I am being forced to apply for federal benefits for Social Security.
I guess the FBI and CIA think I need to be compensated $700/month for their corruption and rape by their employees. They don't want to admit any of them have done anything wrong--they want to justify themselves by having me take money from them and make my argument to the UN weaker, and to any court of law weaker. I guess they are dying to get their hands on more medical records with an excuse for themselves.
That way, the ones they stole and used illegally, can now be gathered and they can claim they were legally obtained. They can continue research of civilians and follow the progress and decline.
They can get their contractual nexus and argue with that. I'm being told now, after I was first promised to have my transcript paid for to go to college, that after I quit working for more U.S. funded employees, and filing for FOIA from the FBI, the FBI and these groups now want me to take Social Security as extortion for my transcript being paid off to go to college.
I'm being extorted again, which is nothing new, and it's the United States government again.
No one even suggested this until I started researching on making the OIG complaint. So it's FBI and then it's FBI again and then more FBI.
To mark the occasion before it occured they got rid of the HP printer and signaled the new change coming with an Epson Workforce so I can be on the "disabled workforce" just like Stacey Epping.
Basically, more CIA shit.
I have this friend named Stacey who gets disability from not having a leg. And then lately all the Catholic assholes, since I've been told I am being required to take Social Security, have been limping around me on crutches, seriously. About 3 or more of them, in my face. It must be broken leg season--In a town of 2,000.
God damn every single person who is responsible for defamation of my character and for the torture of me and my son. God damn you and your family. And God damn this country for allowing crimes and being full of criminals in office and for using me for experimentation for research, after allowing their employees (federal) to fuck me and hoping I'd hang out with them longer, for denying justice to me and my child and obstructing my freedom of travel, work, and medical care when we needed it, and for obstructing my education and independence by extorting me to go on their fucking disability program that I want no part of.
They are using college as extortion to force me to take federal SSI.
Under both the Title II and Title XVI programs, medical evidence is the cornerstone for the determination of disability.
Don't you love the language? everything this country does has turned into a cover up for the biggest crime scenes of the century. God damn this country. I mean it. They wouldn't know what "justice" was if it hit them between the eyes. God damn every single fucker I've had to deal with. God Damn you. That photo of me with my hand over my heart? That's me, as a prisoner in this God-Damned country. I am not using "damn" as curse word either, but as a proclamation and prayer that God hears me and damns this place for what they have allowed. They have had full oversight. God damn every single man that touched me without my full consent and permission and God damn those in the U.S. who did nothing when I made reports about it. God damn those who obstructed justice by forcing me out of court illegally through torture.
GOD DAMN you.
And yes, newsflash. You can be a christian and pray for that this country gets what it deserves, and not be anti-patriotic or anti-God. There are plenty of prophets who have done the exact same thing and no one liked what they had to say very much either. I'm not a prophet, but just because someone says this country deserves the wrath of God for torture and crimes committed here against me, my son, and others, is not anti-christian at all. It's also not anti-patriotic. One can love what a country stood for and used to represent and still know that that it is fully corrupt and deserves retributition from God Himself.
They forced me out of getting SSI when I needed it most, for me and my son, and tortured us here and then they kidnapped us to be forced back here for more torture. Then they want me to take SSI just to get into college again bc college would make me appear too productive.
They want a legal excuse to have their hands on my medical records and an excuse to say they never denied medical care.
It is a little too late for that.
They tortured me all the way up to a hearing deadline to file a notice of appeal for my son and then slacked on the torture after doing it again on Friday in front of a bunch of hypocritical CIA fuckers. Then for the last 2 days they stopped torturing me for about 3-4 hours while torturing the living daylights out of me all day and night, all the way until late at night. Last night, I fell asleep finally and then woke up again, to being tortured.
Tonight, about the time I started writing about Kari Sue and Tim, the odd smell started to fill my place again and I had to open up all of my windows to keep it aired out.
My mother came over to give me some banana bread that matches the appearance of bread I made last night. That's just on top of everything. More fucking CIA and U.S. military experimentation. Of course I was nice and thankful but then I'm like, "Yeah and here's my bread, see how they look alike" because I made bread with garbanzo and white navy beans for flour (along with oat bran ground into flour) and then added pieces of rosehips. First I made it into a banana bread shape but I had to flatten it bc the toaster oven ceiling is too low to allow it to rise.
It was basically like a loaf of banana bread before I had to flatten it.
The thing is, this country takes and takes and takes and takes and kidnapped me when I was asking for political asylum and then they ruined my singing voice.
The U.S. kidnapped me back to this God damned country to be poisoned, drugged, tortured, and harassed and mocked, and if they had not, I would still have my singing voice.
This COUNTRY is FUCKED UP.
They fucking Tortured me to lose my singing voice. They kidnapped my son and tortured him and hypnotized him. They forced me onto the streets and tried to sell off parts of my body to have babies for themselves with my DNA.
GOD DAMN THOSE responsible.
And they haven't quit either. They kidnapped me and my son from protected international status to abuse us further and use us. And first all it was, was hate crime. This military and CIA had nothing to do with that. They ruined my life, and I tried to leave to protect my son's life, and they have caused greater damage than before.
God damn the United States of America. AMEN.
They are also trying to force me off of my parent's own property where I am able to see when they come and go and who is around.
God knows, there is no possible way to express the amount of damage that this country is responsible for inflicting upon my family. Who gets TORTURED to not even be able to go to a law library or file documents for their own child?
GOD DAMN the U.S. GOD FUCKING DAMN this country and those who try to cover for the grossest crimes that have been committed here in decades--to totally innocent people, as a COVER for religious hate crimes.
How in the world could God even be against me, knowing all things? There is no possible way that God is against me or angry with me, or thinks I am taking the wrong perspective. God damns this kind of activity regardless of the person who is a victim. He personally damns those responsible. It doesn't even have to be about ME. It could be about, or could have been about, anyone else, and I'm sure there are others, but regardless of the person, God damns this kind of activity. So I do not believe I am incongruent to profess I love God and pray and firmly believe and that I do care about this country and the citizens, and to still pray God damns those responsible.
If they tortured me all the way up to the hearing deadlines for my son's case, making it impossible for me to do anything, there is no altruistic and well-meaning reason to force me onto SSI disability. All they want is more legal excuses and loopholes for themselves. If they cared about me and my son, they wouldn't be torturing me through all the case stuff and ever since they kidnapped us back from Canada.
I am 100% fully held hostage and now being extorted to take a federal program to cover the FBI and CIA's ass. There is nothing well-meaning about this. If someone had quit torturing me and allowed me to write motions and do research here locally, I would also not be asked to take disability because if they had quit torturing me, it would mean they were going to let me get back into college and prove I was not unfit to mother my own son.
But that's clearly not what they're doing. They torture me. And they do not want me in college proving I am well or fit to be in college, or free of SSI. If I made a big point against SSI in the past, they want to use it with me while I am taking SSI.
I am a different case from my son so I can still argue he is free to not have a SSI number. The fact that my son is not and was not a U.S. citizen when he was forced out from the country he should have stayed in, is a different argument from my own argument. I already had a # and I've been forced to use it ever since, just as I was forced out of a political asylum claim by crime. This doesn't mean that it's not null and void if someone is saying, "I removed myself from that place because they tortured us."
If the U.S. breaks it's contract to its own citizen by violating all laws and privileges, how does it then argue we are citizens to be forced back? You get to treat us like "citizens" when it's convenient for your criminals.
Sunday, January 29, 2012
Tortured @ CIA-Catholic "church" (middleton's revenge)
Really interesting "church" thing I went to a couple of days ago. It included criminals locally and from Redding, CA. Some of them were all the way from Nashville, TN because I recognized some of the kids even. There were even a few of them who had British accents.
It wasn't "church". It was a bunch of hypocrites.
I am sure that some of the people there were good and decent and normal. I am positive. But many of them were malicious, hateful and had nothing in mind other than working out their government research. It was quite discusting and artificial.
I said to my mother, whispering in an aside, at the very start of it, "Did they have
'interpretative dance' last time?" because they had gone the night before. She said no and then I noticed the easles and said, "Oh, I just noticed. They have interpretative painting." I added, "I just don't want to get any LSD in a communion wafer."
The entire thing was a government set-up and I'm sure there were others who were not government, but the entire time I sat there I was tortured so badly that I almost passed out.
I got up to use the restroom and my body cooled down bc they were heating my body at such high extremes I could hardly walk and then I cooled down dramatically in the bathroom and by the time I went back to sit down, I was seeing black spots--almost passed out. I literally almost passed out.
I said nothing, showed nothing, and said nothing. But I almost passed out and had to focus on staying conscious. I literally almost passed out, literally started seeing black patches and then I was extremely nauseous.
There were a bunch of fucking CIA assholes there.
I looked over at my parents and they were trying not to cry.
I actually looked at someone else and they had the exact same restrained tears in their eyes. I don't know why. I didn't talk to that person. I don't know if my parent's were also being tortured, but I definitely was.
All that people cared about, was working out their selfish motives and govt. or other revenge. Several of them were just hateful and half of them were into the CIA-military research.
Middeltons are CIA I am positive.
Have you seen that movie with Brad Pitt?
The one about rescuing the woman and man in a prison after the CIA does a hump and dump? In the very beginning scene at the CIA offices, a woman resembling Kate Middleton walks through their halls.
It is no accident.
It's kind of like, yeah, some things are coincidence and other things are the work of a film producer that is connected in some way to CIA who wants to put in a little "wink and nod" for those who already know.
Spy Game
Check it out. It's "Spy Game" with Brad Pitt. It's not a coincidence anymore than Steven Spielberg adding an English saddle under a rug that is exactly like the one I used to have, which was under a trap door, which I told my Dad about--that I had in a dream.
I have no idea how she got past the British intelligence but she did.
I didn't know if someone had made my parents go to the restroom and put something in the water bottle my mother brought in or what but I saw both of them drinking out of it and thought, maybe they are drinking this in the open so someone here makes sure they are taking their "medicine" or getting poisoned or drugged. So when the idea crossed my mind, I asked to see it and then opened it up and smelled it, which I wouldn't usually do in public.
My mother took it from me, when I did this and she drank the rest and put the bottle under the seat so I asked to take it to the restroom to fill with water. Then I tasted it, just a little and couldn't tell but since I got gotten up and left being tortured, my body cooled down suddenly and I sat back down and almost started blacking out. I had not been gulping the water, there wasn't much there but I tasted it and thought, what in the world because after this, and my sitting, I started to see the room spin and couldn't see as well and was nauseous. I think it was because I had left being lasered or ultrasounded.
All these people there KNEW.
I am sure some did NOT know. But there is no possible way some of those people did not know I was being tortured there in front of all of them.
I was so ill, that I wasn't sure if it was from the water in the bottle or from being lasered. But I was sick and then I focused through it and felt better.
They did this same thing to me in Nashville, TN, in their govt. funded women's shelter. It was even set up the same, with a section to the left, one in the middle, and one to the right.
This place was called "The Father's House" and it's in Winston, Oregon and owned by a "Susan Gelnette" (supposedly). That's what it said on the ownership thing for the business, not that she knows what happened that night or anything, but it was in the drawer bc I looked through all the drawers.
When we were leaving, I realized I couldn't speak the same.
And I realized, oh my gosh, this is the same thing my parents have had too. My Dad has come home from "work" or wherever he's been or who he's been with, and speaking with this odd slurred speech, not like drunk, but something wrong with ability to speak. And the exact same effect happened to me after that night, after being around some criminals (who go to church! so that makes them better..?).
Again, I don't want to offend anyone who was there and was completely innocent. But many were there who were NOT innocent.
My mother has had this same slur of speech. It is the exact same way I ended up speaking once we were in the car. I started talking and trying to talk and it wasn't the same.
If it was not from something in that water, it was the effects of high level torture.
Which means, my parents are being constantly exposed to high levels of torture from technology. I only swiped the bottle with my finger to taste the water, just a tiny bit, to see if there was a flavor. There was no flavor and I thought well maybe someone could gradually drink something and be exposed to it and have it not affect them.
Like arsenic. The Chinese used to slowly build up arsenic levels bc if they did it in very careful gradual amounts, if they got poisoned by an assassination attempt by poisoning, it was a resistance. They didn't die because they had it in their system.
So for a split second, I wondered if it affected me but not them bc they're always having to drink something toxic but I don't totally think so.
I think the nauseau and black patches were from being lasered at high levels and then cooling down and getting dizzy and sick.
I kept the bottle. I didn't say this at the time, but if anything happened to my parents and they keeled over or got sick, I wanted the evidence. So yeah, I didn't trust those people bc right there among them I was being tortured.
So then my Dad said why didn't you stand up for healing?
I said, "Right. I was being tortured there, and I'm going to stand up and ask the same people who know they are torturing me to pray for my 'healing'?" So my Dad said, "Even if you were tortured, who was doing it? and how would everyone there know about it? they don't all have something to do with it."
Then I remembered too, some things to add to my report which I forgot to write about, regarding restraining orders put against me to smudge and smear my record and who was making the most of that. I haven't even heard from my old best friend, for 7 years, since she got married. When her husband asked the police to "restrain" me and her MOTHER, after we went over there out of concern bc her mom said she sounded kidnapped, they put that on me and all the Catholics used it as a shoe slide for an excuse to then add their own. I'm still sort of worried about her, bc to this day I have not heard from her at all and it's not like her. And I remember thinking there is something about him that is different than what I thought. I mean, why did he have all these Catholic books in his bookcase? I never noticed until I was over there after they got married. And the person he knew, "Kari Sue" was a hateful horrid woman. She was hyper-religious, always doing her Bible studies and claiming to pray for hours in her attic upper-room in a house she owned, but there was something very controlling about her. She was an administrative, inflexible, and self-righteous personality with a lot of jealousy issues. She came in like she already knew me and hated me. She worked as secretary for the church we went to then: New Song church. Kari Sue. Uggh. My friend ended up living with Kari Sue and a couple of other women who were very controlling of Monica. They tried to even ruin our friendship, and then HE knew Kari Sue, and she was a TRIP. She was definitely NOT someone who was on my side in any way, shape, or form. She showed up to give Monica a place after I had met the monks of Mt. Angel. I think her background was actually Methodist, like Mykal Holt. Actually, no, I think her background was maybe New Science or that Scientist one. Church of God or Christian Science or something. She supposedly was from CA and also lived in Kentucky or Kansas and then swooped into Oregon to take over. She was short and petite and had a big show about "worship" publicly--dark brown shoulder-length hair. Just a piece of work. One of those controlling, holier-than-thou types that has a reserve like a spy and a cunning like the devil but so-happens to work in church and come between close friends. She's the one who brought her friend "Tim" over to meet her housemate (my friend Monica).
I owned my own house and Kari Sue owned her own house at a fairly young age. I had roommates very liberally and generously. I mean, I didn't try to make money off of my housemates actually. She was totally different. She was there to make a buck off of people.
For example. I had a house with bills (mortgage payments) and I had extra rooms, so I rented them out. I had (have) good business sense, but I am also generous. So I paid the most, and then the other 2 renters paid very little, I can't remember, but I think $200-$275 but I almost think it was a lot less. I didn't make money above my mortgage. I could have. I could have charged more and actually paid my mortgage AND gotten extra. You know, pay my bill and have a little leftover to put into savings. But even though I could have, and been within renting rates, I chose not to.
So they were essentially helping me pay my mortgage while living there, but I wasn't making additional money off of them. Kari Sue was totally different. She wasn't there to be a generous soul. Kari Sue charged her renters enough to cover her actual mortgage costs and then well beyond it. So while claiming to be the "missionary type" and having a "missionary heart", I was the one with the missionary heart while she had the corporate heart. Nothing wrong with a corporate heart, at all, but the incongruence with how she wanted to make herself appear vs reality--they were totally different things.
Not only that, she treated her renters like they were in a women's shelter and not as independent women managing their own lives. I said the rules are this: pay rent on time, pick up after yourself, and if you're gone for awhile, let someone know so we don't call police and can look out for you, oh, and recycle whenever possible (I had sections for plastics, glass, paper, etc). That was it. My place was their place and they had full independence. I didn't feel the need to lord myself over others or control them.
Not Kari Sue. She had a whole "chore list" and made everyone follow a scheduled list with chores and checking boxes and rotating. She charged her renters to make a profit, not for generosity or pious reasons while she tried to claim she was so religious. Then on top of that, she had curfew for her renters. I mean, it was like a women's shelter. And then on top of that, she was one of the worst gossips--she had prayer meetings for others to divulge secrets in and then keep gossip among themselves. She told her renters not to tell anyone how much she charged them for rent, and basically, while she gossiped about others privately, and tried to separate close friends, she asked everyone to keep it a secret.
She was just horrid. I had starting wondering where in the world she had come from and why she had any interest in me at all and wanted to remove friendships or keep her house closed off to others. And that is the person (woman) who brought in her "friend" with all of the other weird people she knew. There was this woman named Ana and her husband, and they seemed nice but everything was about being rigid and controlling. They preached and encouraged absolute, total, and full "obedience" of the woman to the man. Monica wasn't allowed to have an independent thought separate from him, and that's what they encouraged. It wasn't just "wives be submissive to your husband" like scripture, but "wives do not think, act, or do anything without your husband's permission.
She worked as a manager at a bank or mortgage company when I knew her. She was a bank manager for some time and then ended up working as secretary for New Song Church.
With Monica, all I know is that it wasn't just me who was concerned, I knew her mother and her mother had never acted panicked before until that time. The police totally supported Tim but some of them wanted something on me anyway--an excuse from a Protestant. But I had started to wonder what his background really was and SHE, Monica, had told her mother that she felt kidnapped. She had quit and cut off all contact with all of her friends and even her own mother. Her mom (Mexican-American) said to me she thought she had married into some kind of hippie-weirdo-cult.
Ha. It was probably just the CIA. The last time I ever talked to her, it was telling her about these things that were happening to me after these monks, and what was going on. She was freaking out about it and believed me 100% and then the next thing I knew, I was at their house and Tim sort of came onto me and after that, he never wanted Monica alone with me, EVER. So I didn't know if it was bc he didn't want me telling Monica her new husband had come onto me, (which I didn't do), or if he was somehow connected to the monks or something. I just thought it was odd and then they were isolating themselves with just a couple of people who acted suspicious and closed off. For all I know, they heisted Monica for CIA shit. She was a virgin, like me, when she got married, and then had kids, so how do you tell anyone about anything weird. Her mother was forgiven, but I never was. And then her mom wouldn't talk to me either. I guess bc things were getting so bad for me. But definitely, these new friends were very odd. They wanted to enclose her and isolate her and those poor kids. I can only imagine what some of them have done with them.
But yeah, he showed up after I knew the monks, through Kari Sue. I don't have anything against him inherently at all, I just know she wasn't acting mentally healthy after she was married to him and then she had kids and we were all isolated. I don't mean I thought Monica was acting "ill" but not herself and self-doubting and panicked. Out of it, basically. They probably tortured her in childbirth and she didn't even know what was happening. She also had this overly long child bearing session. I wonder if her kids' heads got "molded" too. They treated that entire childbirth like an Area 51 Top Secret Project, barring her own mother from seeing her.
(there was a new DJ switch and now the man that replaced the woman is entertaining the pregnancy topic. About being sick. By the way, I also saw that about Kate Middleon. Looking through receipts or papers of different sizes, smaller, in her hands and someone looking over her shoulder as she tried to hide it. Then her reading my FBI files from someone and I'd like to know who is giving HER my FBI file. And then something about throwing up--I just saw it once.)
Anyway, I am not pregnant and there is no possible chance of that. I've been celibate for almost 3 years now, again. I guess in 3 months it will have been 3 years of celibacy again.
Like I've said, it's not a problem for me (celibacy by choice). You have to get over the habit like anything and then it's homefree. Sure, if I'm married, I know it would be everyday, but there is no problem going from one extreme to the other for me. Which is WHY I am NOT an "addictive personality". I can quit anytime I want. Mind over matter.
The only things I imagine would be unfair to almost anyone, is maybe heroin or crack cocaine or the things I've heard someone say it's like you try it one time and you're hooked and it's almost impossible to stop. I mean, stuff like that would challenge the self-control of anyone, and definitely, tobacco is addictive. But I can take something on and quit it, like a snap of my fingers.
Love you! oh oh. You crossed the line. I don't love you starting now. Tah-dah!
Most times, on the relationship thing, I give people way too much leeway and benefit of a doubt. I mean, it took me years to face the facts about my "friend" Christa. I gave her several years past when I should have known but I didn't want to jump to conclusions. Even when so many things add up, still, I wanted to be sure.
Anyone who thinks they have to be in a relationship or can't survive without something, hasn't allowed themselves to be abstinent long enough to see if they can really do it. Some people are chain-daters like chain-smokers. They have their next one lined up before the last one ended, just in case.
No way jose. Not for me.
You know what pop song I love? the one about "I'm not doing a drive-by...I really like you but I'm not doing a drive-by" or whatever. It cracks me up only if I think about James Cartwright singing this song. It cracks me up, only to put this next to a professional person. Drive bys.
The other day I was looking up legal stuff, federal law, about kidnapping and thinking about B.C. and what happened to me there and then I noticed my books, out of the blue. I hadn't planned it but stopped and noticed, this one book overlapping another one and the one under it said, covering the "w", "ellness". I thought about Elle from the legal movie. Elle-ness and the book is from CA Berkeley so I sort of laughed. Ironys.
Oh to have an Iron Bed 13 feet long and be known in historical accounts as "The King with the iron bed that was 13 feet long." And the bed was put into a museum where everyone could see it and amaze until one day there was a war and they melted it down for weapons. Make ? not WAR? Why does anyone need a bed that's 13 feet long?
Anyway, this whole "church" thing had people there imitating people from my old church New Song, which I thought was odd, and then torturing me, and doing bizarre stuff with trying to read people and insult them at the same time.
It went from my telling Monica to remember what I told her because she could be a witness in the future, to never seeing her again. Right before litigation. ? Totally bizarre. Now it's been 7 years. Which is not like her, and her own mom knew it but I guess once you're married to someone and have kids, it's hard to argue against it.
I wrote to an old mutual friend and asked if he'd heard from her and just through the grapevine but Monica had been telling me even 7 yrs ago she couldn't email me unless Tim said it was okay. First, when we were still talking, she couldn't meet me for coffee or to chat anymore without him there. Then it was not even email. Then it was nothing. By now, she's probably completely brainwashed.
Now I'm remembering. Kari Sue moved to California. She was supposedly from Kansas (?) at first and sometimes California and she knew Tim from a Bible place in California (pretty sure). After she was in Oregon separating friends, she moved to California I think, for a job transfer or promotion with the bank or lending firm she worked for.
Kari Sue. Straight from Hell.
I would love to know what she was doing before Oregon and what she's done since because she was so secretive and conniving. I think it says something that I am still not in contact with Monica. She had said to me then, "Tim says you have to send him an email apologizing first and then we can talk again."
The police were dumb enough to use him as an excuse to put a restraining order on me and her mom and then they dropped the one for her mom and kept the one on me bc it worked to the advantage of others who already wanted to smear me (and maybe who were even connected to Tim or Kari Sue). Her mom had said to me, "She says she thinks she's going to have a nervous breakdown!" and something about being kidnapped. I had thought she acted like something was wrong before she was even pregnant. It was in their apartment, not their house. She just wasn't acting like herself. That was most likely the effects of Kari Sue and the brainwashing of others telling her to obey them and get rid of long-term friendships. I think even though hippie people were from California originally. They were all Californians at some point.
I would bet some of them profitted off of smearing me for others. How much you wanna bet?
I was just at this church conference that says I'm right.
I almost want to say I remember hearing something about Kari Sue having some kind of connection to the Air Force too. I am pretty sure it was a military connection as well and I believe it was Air Force. Like her Dad was, or someone very close to her was.
On Saturday, the day after the church thing (which was Friday night) all these people were in town doing psychic psi stuff. I saw several people from the church service we'd just been to. I left to get something downtown and when I returned my Mom didn't look very happy and the dog was freaking out. I said, "Have you been around English accents Scooter?" I said with my mom overhearing and I said who was here. She said no one and I said, "He's shivering and acting like he's been around that one kind of English accent." She said no one but he was acting strangely.
There were 2 men with British accents at the thing that night (and other english without accents (slips) showing), but neither of the accents sounded like the one dialect that Kiera and that other guy use.
Kari Sue recommended that Monica buy and use Tea Tree Oil products. All of a sudden she was on a tea tree oil kick. Whatever Kari Sue suggested, she did. I know Kari Sue had a brother, but I don't remember which one was in the Air Force. Bill Gates' site just put up an ad next to my email which reminded me about something else. It's an ad "from corporate sponsors to end poverty"...which is hilarious. She gave to World Vision like I did then, but she overcharged her renters to profit from them so she could then appear to be a philanthropist. Sort of like Bill and Melinda milking others for billions and screwing over small business owners and ruining democracy so they can put their pile of change into africa in a big heap hoping everyone will see. It's like the parable of the business person that screws people over and gets rich or makes money off of them, and then goes to church to dump a bunch of money into the coffer hoping people will notice how much they gave.
The 'excuse' is that they can do good with their money if they ruin democracy and society by screwing other honest people over first. So instead of allowing others to make a living in business and contribute to helping people, they want the philanthropist credit to go to them. How about not screwing over the justice system so it stinks for everyone to begin with?
Thanks for weakening America while you try to take credit for yourselves.
(and I do NOT have anything against the rich and favor the poor either. I think the rich get persecuted too, just for being rich or talented...the point is the hypocrisy)
Here. Let me take away everything that you own and then I want to be the one to "help you" out of your grave. That kind of thing. It's a backwards idea of appearing charitable.
It wasn't "church". It was a bunch of hypocrites.
I am sure that some of the people there were good and decent and normal. I am positive. But many of them were malicious, hateful and had nothing in mind other than working out their government research. It was quite discusting and artificial.
I said to my mother, whispering in an aside, at the very start of it, "Did they have
'interpretative dance' last time?" because they had gone the night before. She said no and then I noticed the easles and said, "Oh, I just noticed. They have interpretative painting." I added, "I just don't want to get any LSD in a communion wafer."
The entire thing was a government set-up and I'm sure there were others who were not government, but the entire time I sat there I was tortured so badly that I almost passed out.
I got up to use the restroom and my body cooled down bc they were heating my body at such high extremes I could hardly walk and then I cooled down dramatically in the bathroom and by the time I went back to sit down, I was seeing black spots--almost passed out. I literally almost passed out.
I said nothing, showed nothing, and said nothing. But I almost passed out and had to focus on staying conscious. I literally almost passed out, literally started seeing black patches and then I was extremely nauseous.
There were a bunch of fucking CIA assholes there.
I looked over at my parents and they were trying not to cry.
I actually looked at someone else and they had the exact same restrained tears in their eyes. I don't know why. I didn't talk to that person. I don't know if my parent's were also being tortured, but I definitely was.
All that people cared about, was working out their selfish motives and govt. or other revenge. Several of them were just hateful and half of them were into the CIA-military research.
Middeltons are CIA I am positive.
Have you seen that movie with Brad Pitt?
The one about rescuing the woman and man in a prison after the CIA does a hump and dump? In the very beginning scene at the CIA offices, a woman resembling Kate Middleton walks through their halls.
It is no accident.
It's kind of like, yeah, some things are coincidence and other things are the work of a film producer that is connected in some way to CIA who wants to put in a little "wink and nod" for those who already know.
Spy Game
Check it out. It's "Spy Game" with Brad Pitt. It's not a coincidence anymore than Steven Spielberg adding an English saddle under a rug that is exactly like the one I used to have, which was under a trap door, which I told my Dad about--that I had in a dream.
I have no idea how she got past the British intelligence but she did.
I didn't know if someone had made my parents go to the restroom and put something in the water bottle my mother brought in or what but I saw both of them drinking out of it and thought, maybe they are drinking this in the open so someone here makes sure they are taking their "medicine" or getting poisoned or drugged. So when the idea crossed my mind, I asked to see it and then opened it up and smelled it, which I wouldn't usually do in public.
My mother took it from me, when I did this and she drank the rest and put the bottle under the seat so I asked to take it to the restroom to fill with water. Then I tasted it, just a little and couldn't tell but since I got gotten up and left being tortured, my body cooled down suddenly and I sat back down and almost started blacking out. I had not been gulping the water, there wasn't much there but I tasted it and thought, what in the world because after this, and my sitting, I started to see the room spin and couldn't see as well and was nauseous. I think it was because I had left being lasered or ultrasounded.
All these people there KNEW.
I am sure some did NOT know. But there is no possible way some of those people did not know I was being tortured there in front of all of them.
I was so ill, that I wasn't sure if it was from the water in the bottle or from being lasered. But I was sick and then I focused through it and felt better.
They did this same thing to me in Nashville, TN, in their govt. funded women's shelter. It was even set up the same, with a section to the left, one in the middle, and one to the right.
This place was called "The Father's House" and it's in Winston, Oregon and owned by a "Susan Gelnette" (supposedly). That's what it said on the ownership thing for the business, not that she knows what happened that night or anything, but it was in the drawer bc I looked through all the drawers.
When we were leaving, I realized I couldn't speak the same.
And I realized, oh my gosh, this is the same thing my parents have had too. My Dad has come home from "work" or wherever he's been or who he's been with, and speaking with this odd slurred speech, not like drunk, but something wrong with ability to speak. And the exact same effect happened to me after that night, after being around some criminals (who go to church! so that makes them better..?).
Again, I don't want to offend anyone who was there and was completely innocent. But many were there who were NOT innocent.
My mother has had this same slur of speech. It is the exact same way I ended up speaking once we were in the car. I started talking and trying to talk and it wasn't the same.
If it was not from something in that water, it was the effects of high level torture.
Which means, my parents are being constantly exposed to high levels of torture from technology. I only swiped the bottle with my finger to taste the water, just a tiny bit, to see if there was a flavor. There was no flavor and I thought well maybe someone could gradually drink something and be exposed to it and have it not affect them.
Like arsenic. The Chinese used to slowly build up arsenic levels bc if they did it in very careful gradual amounts, if they got poisoned by an assassination attempt by poisoning, it was a resistance. They didn't die because they had it in their system.
So for a split second, I wondered if it affected me but not them bc they're always having to drink something toxic but I don't totally think so.
I think the nauseau and black patches were from being lasered at high levels and then cooling down and getting dizzy and sick.
I kept the bottle. I didn't say this at the time, but if anything happened to my parents and they keeled over or got sick, I wanted the evidence. So yeah, I didn't trust those people bc right there among them I was being tortured.
So then my Dad said why didn't you stand up for healing?
I said, "Right. I was being tortured there, and I'm going to stand up and ask the same people who know they are torturing me to pray for my 'healing'?" So my Dad said, "Even if you were tortured, who was doing it? and how would everyone there know about it? they don't all have something to do with it."
Then I remembered too, some things to add to my report which I forgot to write about, regarding restraining orders put against me to smudge and smear my record and who was making the most of that. I haven't even heard from my old best friend, for 7 years, since she got married. When her husband asked the police to "restrain" me and her MOTHER, after we went over there out of concern bc her mom said she sounded kidnapped, they put that on me and all the Catholics used it as a shoe slide for an excuse to then add their own. I'm still sort of worried about her, bc to this day I have not heard from her at all and it's not like her. And I remember thinking there is something about him that is different than what I thought. I mean, why did he have all these Catholic books in his bookcase? I never noticed until I was over there after they got married. And the person he knew, "Kari Sue" was a hateful horrid woman. She was hyper-religious, always doing her Bible studies and claiming to pray for hours in her attic upper-room in a house she owned, but there was something very controlling about her. She was an administrative, inflexible, and self-righteous personality with a lot of jealousy issues. She came in like she already knew me and hated me. She worked as secretary for the church we went to then: New Song church. Kari Sue. Uggh. My friend ended up living with Kari Sue and a couple of other women who were very controlling of Monica. They tried to even ruin our friendship, and then HE knew Kari Sue, and she was a TRIP. She was definitely NOT someone who was on my side in any way, shape, or form. She showed up to give Monica a place after I had met the monks of Mt. Angel. I think her background was actually Methodist, like Mykal Holt. Actually, no, I think her background was maybe New Science or that Scientist one. Church of God or Christian Science or something. She supposedly was from CA and also lived in Kentucky or Kansas and then swooped into Oregon to take over. She was short and petite and had a big show about "worship" publicly--dark brown shoulder-length hair. Just a piece of work. One of those controlling, holier-than-thou types that has a reserve like a spy and a cunning like the devil but so-happens to work in church and come between close friends. She's the one who brought her friend "Tim" over to meet her housemate (my friend Monica).
I owned my own house and Kari Sue owned her own house at a fairly young age. I had roommates very liberally and generously. I mean, I didn't try to make money off of my housemates actually. She was totally different. She was there to make a buck off of people.
For example. I had a house with bills (mortgage payments) and I had extra rooms, so I rented them out. I had (have) good business sense, but I am also generous. So I paid the most, and then the other 2 renters paid very little, I can't remember, but I think $200-$275 but I almost think it was a lot less. I didn't make money above my mortgage. I could have. I could have charged more and actually paid my mortgage AND gotten extra. You know, pay my bill and have a little leftover to put into savings. But even though I could have, and been within renting rates, I chose not to.
So they were essentially helping me pay my mortgage while living there, but I wasn't making additional money off of them. Kari Sue was totally different. She wasn't there to be a generous soul. Kari Sue charged her renters enough to cover her actual mortgage costs and then well beyond it. So while claiming to be the "missionary type" and having a "missionary heart", I was the one with the missionary heart while she had the corporate heart. Nothing wrong with a corporate heart, at all, but the incongruence with how she wanted to make herself appear vs reality--they were totally different things.
Not only that, she treated her renters like they were in a women's shelter and not as independent women managing their own lives. I said the rules are this: pay rent on time, pick up after yourself, and if you're gone for awhile, let someone know so we don't call police and can look out for you, oh, and recycle whenever possible (I had sections for plastics, glass, paper, etc). That was it. My place was their place and they had full independence. I didn't feel the need to lord myself over others or control them.
Not Kari Sue. She had a whole "chore list" and made everyone follow a scheduled list with chores and checking boxes and rotating. She charged her renters to make a profit, not for generosity or pious reasons while she tried to claim she was so religious. Then on top of that, she had curfew for her renters. I mean, it was like a women's shelter. And then on top of that, she was one of the worst gossips--she had prayer meetings for others to divulge secrets in and then keep gossip among themselves. She told her renters not to tell anyone how much she charged them for rent, and basically, while she gossiped about others privately, and tried to separate close friends, she asked everyone to keep it a secret.
She was just horrid. I had starting wondering where in the world she had come from and why she had any interest in me at all and wanted to remove friendships or keep her house closed off to others. And that is the person (woman) who brought in her "friend" with all of the other weird people she knew. There was this woman named Ana and her husband, and they seemed nice but everything was about being rigid and controlling. They preached and encouraged absolute, total, and full "obedience" of the woman to the man. Monica wasn't allowed to have an independent thought separate from him, and that's what they encouraged. It wasn't just "wives be submissive to your husband" like scripture, but "wives do not think, act, or do anything without your husband's permission.
She worked as a manager at a bank or mortgage company when I knew her. She was a bank manager for some time and then ended up working as secretary for New Song Church.
With Monica, all I know is that it wasn't just me who was concerned, I knew her mother and her mother had never acted panicked before until that time. The police totally supported Tim but some of them wanted something on me anyway--an excuse from a Protestant. But I had started to wonder what his background really was and SHE, Monica, had told her mother that she felt kidnapped. She had quit and cut off all contact with all of her friends and even her own mother. Her mom (Mexican-American) said to me she thought she had married into some kind of hippie-weirdo-cult.
Ha. It was probably just the CIA. The last time I ever talked to her, it was telling her about these things that were happening to me after these monks, and what was going on. She was freaking out about it and believed me 100% and then the next thing I knew, I was at their house and Tim sort of came onto me and after that, he never wanted Monica alone with me, EVER. So I didn't know if it was bc he didn't want me telling Monica her new husband had come onto me, (which I didn't do), or if he was somehow connected to the monks or something. I just thought it was odd and then they were isolating themselves with just a couple of people who acted suspicious and closed off. For all I know, they heisted Monica for CIA shit. She was a virgin, like me, when she got married, and then had kids, so how do you tell anyone about anything weird. Her mother was forgiven, but I never was. And then her mom wouldn't talk to me either. I guess bc things were getting so bad for me. But definitely, these new friends were very odd. They wanted to enclose her and isolate her and those poor kids. I can only imagine what some of them have done with them.
But yeah, he showed up after I knew the monks, through Kari Sue. I don't have anything against him inherently at all, I just know she wasn't acting mentally healthy after she was married to him and then she had kids and we were all isolated. I don't mean I thought Monica was acting "ill" but not herself and self-doubting and panicked. Out of it, basically. They probably tortured her in childbirth and she didn't even know what was happening. She also had this overly long child bearing session. I wonder if her kids' heads got "molded" too. They treated that entire childbirth like an Area 51 Top Secret Project, barring her own mother from seeing her.
(there was a new DJ switch and now the man that replaced the woman is entertaining the pregnancy topic. About being sick. By the way, I also saw that about Kate Middleon. Looking through receipts or papers of different sizes, smaller, in her hands and someone looking over her shoulder as she tried to hide it. Then her reading my FBI files from someone and I'd like to know who is giving HER my FBI file. And then something about throwing up--I just saw it once.)
Anyway, I am not pregnant and there is no possible chance of that. I've been celibate for almost 3 years now, again. I guess in 3 months it will have been 3 years of celibacy again.
Like I've said, it's not a problem for me (celibacy by choice). You have to get over the habit like anything and then it's homefree. Sure, if I'm married, I know it would be everyday, but there is no problem going from one extreme to the other for me. Which is WHY I am NOT an "addictive personality". I can quit anytime I want. Mind over matter.
The only things I imagine would be unfair to almost anyone, is maybe heroin or crack cocaine or the things I've heard someone say it's like you try it one time and you're hooked and it's almost impossible to stop. I mean, stuff like that would challenge the self-control of anyone, and definitely, tobacco is addictive. But I can take something on and quit it, like a snap of my fingers.
Love you! oh oh. You crossed the line. I don't love you starting now. Tah-dah!
Most times, on the relationship thing, I give people way too much leeway and benefit of a doubt. I mean, it took me years to face the facts about my "friend" Christa. I gave her several years past when I should have known but I didn't want to jump to conclusions. Even when so many things add up, still, I wanted to be sure.
Anyone who thinks they have to be in a relationship or can't survive without something, hasn't allowed themselves to be abstinent long enough to see if they can really do it. Some people are chain-daters like chain-smokers. They have their next one lined up before the last one ended, just in case.
No way jose. Not for me.
You know what pop song I love? the one about "I'm not doing a drive-by...I really like you but I'm not doing a drive-by" or whatever. It cracks me up only if I think about James Cartwright singing this song. It cracks me up, only to put this next to a professional person. Drive bys.
The other day I was looking up legal stuff, federal law, about kidnapping and thinking about B.C. and what happened to me there and then I noticed my books, out of the blue. I hadn't planned it but stopped and noticed, this one book overlapping another one and the one under it said, covering the "w", "ellness". I thought about Elle from the legal movie. Elle-ness and the book is from CA Berkeley so I sort of laughed. Ironys.
Oh to have an Iron Bed 13 feet long and be known in historical accounts as "The King with the iron bed that was 13 feet long." And the bed was put into a museum where everyone could see it and amaze until one day there was a war and they melted it down for weapons. Make ? not WAR? Why does anyone need a bed that's 13 feet long?
Anyway, this whole "church" thing had people there imitating people from my old church New Song, which I thought was odd, and then torturing me, and doing bizarre stuff with trying to read people and insult them at the same time.
It went from my telling Monica to remember what I told her because she could be a witness in the future, to never seeing her again. Right before litigation. ? Totally bizarre. Now it's been 7 years. Which is not like her, and her own mom knew it but I guess once you're married to someone and have kids, it's hard to argue against it.
I wrote to an old mutual friend and asked if he'd heard from her and just through the grapevine but Monica had been telling me even 7 yrs ago she couldn't email me unless Tim said it was okay. First, when we were still talking, she couldn't meet me for coffee or to chat anymore without him there. Then it was not even email. Then it was nothing. By now, she's probably completely brainwashed.
Now I'm remembering. Kari Sue moved to California. She was supposedly from Kansas (?) at first and sometimes California and she knew Tim from a Bible place in California (pretty sure). After she was in Oregon separating friends, she moved to California I think, for a job transfer or promotion with the bank or lending firm she worked for.
Kari Sue. Straight from Hell.
I would love to know what she was doing before Oregon and what she's done since because she was so secretive and conniving. I think it says something that I am still not in contact with Monica. She had said to me then, "Tim says you have to send him an email apologizing first and then we can talk again."
The police were dumb enough to use him as an excuse to put a restraining order on me and her mom and then they dropped the one for her mom and kept the one on me bc it worked to the advantage of others who already wanted to smear me (and maybe who were even connected to Tim or Kari Sue). Her mom had said to me, "She says she thinks she's going to have a nervous breakdown!" and something about being kidnapped. I had thought she acted like something was wrong before she was even pregnant. It was in their apartment, not their house. She just wasn't acting like herself. That was most likely the effects of Kari Sue and the brainwashing of others telling her to obey them and get rid of long-term friendships. I think even though hippie people were from California originally. They were all Californians at some point.
I would bet some of them profitted off of smearing me for others. How much you wanna bet?
I was just at this church conference that says I'm right.
I almost want to say I remember hearing something about Kari Sue having some kind of connection to the Air Force too. I am pretty sure it was a military connection as well and I believe it was Air Force. Like her Dad was, or someone very close to her was.
On Saturday, the day after the church thing (which was Friday night) all these people were in town doing psychic psi stuff. I saw several people from the church service we'd just been to. I left to get something downtown and when I returned my Mom didn't look very happy and the dog was freaking out. I said, "Have you been around English accents Scooter?" I said with my mom overhearing and I said who was here. She said no one and I said, "He's shivering and acting like he's been around that one kind of English accent." She said no one but he was acting strangely.
There were 2 men with British accents at the thing that night (and other english without accents (slips) showing), but neither of the accents sounded like the one dialect that Kiera and that other guy use.
Kari Sue recommended that Monica buy and use Tea Tree Oil products. All of a sudden she was on a tea tree oil kick. Whatever Kari Sue suggested, she did. I know Kari Sue had a brother, but I don't remember which one was in the Air Force. Bill Gates' site just put up an ad next to my email which reminded me about something else. It's an ad "from corporate sponsors to end poverty"...which is hilarious. She gave to World Vision like I did then, but she overcharged her renters to profit from them so she could then appear to be a philanthropist. Sort of like Bill and Melinda milking others for billions and screwing over small business owners and ruining democracy so they can put their pile of change into africa in a big heap hoping everyone will see. It's like the parable of the business person that screws people over and gets rich or makes money off of them, and then goes to church to dump a bunch of money into the coffer hoping people will notice how much they gave.
The 'excuse' is that they can do good with their money if they ruin democracy and society by screwing other honest people over first. So instead of allowing others to make a living in business and contribute to helping people, they want the philanthropist credit to go to them. How about not screwing over the justice system so it stinks for everyone to begin with?
Thanks for weakening America while you try to take credit for yourselves.
(and I do NOT have anything against the rich and favor the poor either. I think the rich get persecuted too, just for being rich or talented...the point is the hypocrisy)
Here. Let me take away everything that you own and then I want to be the one to "help you" out of your grave. That kind of thing. It's a backwards idea of appearing charitable.
Evidence of Torture to Me (photo) and art photos
I'm including what the marks from laser to my hand now look like today (after peeling). One of me showing it's me and then a close up of the marks.
These are my Bibles. Blurry photo. The things sticking out are ties (twisties) I use to mark spots with, along with pieces of paper and mail--whatever is at hand if I suddenly don't want to lose a spot and grab whatever is closest)
the following are not necessarily best quality or focus or clarity but maybe i liked something about the balance. some of the best ones are in hiding right now bc i took so many so they're not showing up. so some of the best ones will not be up today. i might put up a few of things as I found them too, which are not art but interesting things I found.
Bible Scripture
I said I'd write about some things I've read recently so I will, since it's Sunday.
Today I read a few different passages but the one which I felt the most on was from Deuteronomy 2 & 3. It was random, not of my own choosing but random but I prayed before that God would have me think about something from what I turned to. I read at the part where it says not to provoke or harass the Moabites. It said God gave them their land for an inheritance. Then it goes to the other lands God does want them to take. And then the part I thought about the most, aside from seeing directions on "go" and "stop", was how God then says, go forth to this other land and take it and Moses prays and flatters God and says let us look over to this land and see it.http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZmPNqPhHV2Y (I read from my own bible but here is a clip though it's missing 3 so I'll go to the one with 2 & 3).
There is no interpretation about what this meant but then God tells Moses in response, you can go ahead and look at it. Go to the top of the hill and look in every direction but you will not cross that land.
I think it's because God was upset he didn't have faith. God told him to do something and he wanted to see it first. God didn't like that (I think). So he said, go ahead and look but now someone else will take the people over the Jordan river.
And God loved Moses, to the point of striking his own sister Miriam, with leprosy when she and Aaron grumbled and said "Does God only speak through Moses? he's spoken through US too!" God said others see me in dreams and signs but Moses sees me face to face. There is no one as humble as Moses. So Moses cried out and asked God to heal her and he did, but this shows God's favor on Moses, yet it is not as though Moses was perfect.
When Moses doubted God, as he did when he said, "I stutter and I'm not a good speaker, make Aaron the speaker...", when he faltered about taking a good land without seeing it first, God said okay then, go ahead and get a preview. Look. But now someone else will lead the people over it.
It made me think about how God wasn't giving them "all" the land or territories--he said "this one is for them" and go here, not there, and then this one is for you, but have faith.
Before Moses prays this, sort of interesting, but I don't think it means anything, they pass through "seir" (pronounced seer) and then he wants to see the next land and God just wanted him to maybe have faith and believe it was good or not to worry about strategy.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=K-qkjGcyGIo
Here's 2 & 3 together: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vsASSSJJO6k (this one is easier to follow as it's together and doesn't drown out or fade out in the end...I don't know why the ending is muddled in the one through audiobible but it's not muddled in this one at the end of ch. 3 and you can hear it clearly)
It sort of goes with some things I've thought about recently but I know the application is much broader. I have thought in the last few days, maybe it was yesterday or day before, about Moses and how he said, "but I am only..." and he wasn't gifted the way he felt he should be. I was thinking about how some very good people appear to have few outward signs of gifts and others have gifts and don't believe in them or trust God, but thinking of Moses and how God said it's his power but since Moses kept worrying about his stutter, God said okay, I'll have Aaron be the speaker but you are still the leader. So I thought about fear and then this morning I turned on the radio and heard a sermon about not having fear, for God has given us x and x and "a sound mind". And then the pastor said he used to be afraid of speaking publicly and became nauseous from it but just did it anyway.
More recently, in the last few days, there have been more correlations of scripture with things I'm thinking about. So it's been interesting. I wrote about "Silence of the Lambs" for example and how I feel my torturers are like this Hannibal Lector and then I turned, after writing this, to a section about "He was led as a lamb to the slaughter.." and how it talks about Jesus, but referring to the scripture from the OT to apply to Jesus, about how he was "degraded" and "in his humiliation" he was treated or saved some.
Then, for a couple of days I kept getting scriptures about the old one being fertile. The same kind of scriptures about how the old one is the fertile one and I don't know what that's about exactly. I marked out the sections and let me find them. First I kept landing on sections about older women giving birth and then while thinking about this, I ended up on Psalm 92 about older women being fertile (on Friday 27th). The other passages were II Kings 4:14, "...she has no son and her husband is old." and Elisha says you will hold a baby in your arms next year and she says don't lie to me. Then it happens. There was one other passage and it was about an older woman or the old one being fertile...I was just trying to find the other section I had read and in so doing, came across 2 new passages on the same topic, within seconds. One about the old tree being cut down and how it will still put forth buds and branches. (Job 14). How the old tree can be cut down and still flourish again but if a man is dead, how shall he rise from the grave? (which is possibly why my family needs to have the UN intervene on CAT--convention against torture petition). After this I turned back and was trying to find the other section and instead I randomly landed on, next section, scripture about a king who was 80 years old and another king said come with us. He said, "I'm 80 years old! why should you want me to go with you in my old age?" and others questioned this and the king said, "this man is a close relative and why should we leave him behind?" (II Sam. 19:34 is what my eyes landed on). (at about 12:50 a.m. or something). Anyway, I can't find the one about the woman right now, the other passage about the same thing, and I know there are many examples (Sarah, etc) but I was wanting to find the exact passage it was. Right now I am hungry and need to have breakfast, or I guess it's lunch now.
Also, I read from the part about Elijah and Elisha and the coat that parted the waters and how Elisha was given a double portion of Elijah's spirit. and from the NT from Mark 3 about Jesus and Beelebub, when a lot of people accused Jesus saying "he is out of his mind." Jesus's own family was sent to "take care of" JESUS. They went to go get Jesus, a grown man, because people were saying, "He's out of his mind." So Jesus's mother and father went to "go get him" like they were his guardians (as if that's not humiliating). And all these pharisees (religious jewish leaders) were telling everyone, "Any 'miracle' that is being done through him is of evil spirits and the devil." and they were not even saying he was out of his mind but that he was "demon-possessed". Beelzebub is a name for "Prince of Demons".
So I guess I never thought of Jesus in that way, because not many pastors give a sermon about how Jesus became a ward of the court (in approximation) and entire communities told his parents to "come get him" and "take care of your mentally ill son".
If he wasn't being accused of being an alcoholic (wine-bibber, for having an occasional drink), or mentally ill, he was accused of being demon-possessed.
He would have been falsely arrested, sent to drug rehab without needing it, and put in a psych ward with the signature of his mom and dad. Most likely, the people who hated him most would have wanted him to be injected with Haldol.
Today I read a few different passages but the one which I felt the most on was from Deuteronomy 2 & 3. It was random, not of my own choosing but random but I prayed before that God would have me think about something from what I turned to. I read at the part where it says not to provoke or harass the Moabites. It said God gave them their land for an inheritance. Then it goes to the other lands God does want them to take. And then the part I thought about the most, aside from seeing directions on "go" and "stop", was how God then says, go forth to this other land and take it and Moses prays and flatters God and says let us look over to this land and see it.http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZmPNqPhHV2Y (I read from my own bible but here is a clip though it's missing 3 so I'll go to the one with 2 & 3).
There is no interpretation about what this meant but then God tells Moses in response, you can go ahead and look at it. Go to the top of the hill and look in every direction but you will not cross that land.
I think it's because God was upset he didn't have faith. God told him to do something and he wanted to see it first. God didn't like that (I think). So he said, go ahead and look but now someone else will take the people over the Jordan river.
And God loved Moses, to the point of striking his own sister Miriam, with leprosy when she and Aaron grumbled and said "Does God only speak through Moses? he's spoken through US too!" God said others see me in dreams and signs but Moses sees me face to face. There is no one as humble as Moses. So Moses cried out and asked God to heal her and he did, but this shows God's favor on Moses, yet it is not as though Moses was perfect.
When Moses doubted God, as he did when he said, "I stutter and I'm not a good speaker, make Aaron the speaker...", when he faltered about taking a good land without seeing it first, God said okay then, go ahead and get a preview. Look. But now someone else will lead the people over it.
It made me think about how God wasn't giving them "all" the land or territories--he said "this one is for them" and go here, not there, and then this one is for you, but have faith.
Before Moses prays this, sort of interesting, but I don't think it means anything, they pass through "seir" (pronounced seer) and then he wants to see the next land and God just wanted him to maybe have faith and believe it was good or not to worry about strategy.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=K-qkjGcyGIo
Here's 2 & 3 together: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vsASSSJJO6k (this one is easier to follow as it's together and doesn't drown out or fade out in the end...I don't know why the ending is muddled in the one through audiobible but it's not muddled in this one at the end of ch. 3 and you can hear it clearly)
It sort of goes with some things I've thought about recently but I know the application is much broader. I have thought in the last few days, maybe it was yesterday or day before, about Moses and how he said, "but I am only..." and he wasn't gifted the way he felt he should be. I was thinking about how some very good people appear to have few outward signs of gifts and others have gifts and don't believe in them or trust God, but thinking of Moses and how God said it's his power but since Moses kept worrying about his stutter, God said okay, I'll have Aaron be the speaker but you are still the leader. So I thought about fear and then this morning I turned on the radio and heard a sermon about not having fear, for God has given us x and x and "a sound mind". And then the pastor said he used to be afraid of speaking publicly and became nauseous from it but just did it anyway.
More recently, in the last few days, there have been more correlations of scripture with things I'm thinking about. So it's been interesting. I wrote about "Silence of the Lambs" for example and how I feel my torturers are like this Hannibal Lector and then I turned, after writing this, to a section about "He was led as a lamb to the slaughter.." and how it talks about Jesus, but referring to the scripture from the OT to apply to Jesus, about how he was "degraded" and "in his humiliation" he was treated or saved some.
Then, for a couple of days I kept getting scriptures about the old one being fertile. The same kind of scriptures about how the old one is the fertile one and I don't know what that's about exactly. I marked out the sections and let me find them. First I kept landing on sections about older women giving birth and then while thinking about this, I ended up on Psalm 92 about older women being fertile (on Friday 27th). The other passages were II Kings 4:14, "...she has no son and her husband is old." and Elisha says you will hold a baby in your arms next year and she says don't lie to me. Then it happens. There was one other passage and it was about an older woman or the old one being fertile...I was just trying to find the other section I had read and in so doing, came across 2 new passages on the same topic, within seconds. One about the old tree being cut down and how it will still put forth buds and branches. (Job 14). How the old tree can be cut down and still flourish again but if a man is dead, how shall he rise from the grave? (which is possibly why my family needs to have the UN intervene on CAT--convention against torture petition). After this I turned back and was trying to find the other section and instead I randomly landed on, next section, scripture about a king who was 80 years old and another king said come with us. He said, "I'm 80 years old! why should you want me to go with you in my old age?" and others questioned this and the king said, "this man is a close relative and why should we leave him behind?" (II Sam. 19:34 is what my eyes landed on). (at about 12:50 a.m. or something). Anyway, I can't find the one about the woman right now, the other passage about the same thing, and I know there are many examples (Sarah, etc) but I was wanting to find the exact passage it was. Right now I am hungry and need to have breakfast, or I guess it's lunch now.
Also, I read from the part about Elijah and Elisha and the coat that parted the waters and how Elisha was given a double portion of Elijah's spirit. and from the NT from Mark 3 about Jesus and Beelebub, when a lot of people accused Jesus saying "he is out of his mind." Jesus's own family was sent to "take care of" JESUS. They went to go get Jesus, a grown man, because people were saying, "He's out of his mind." So Jesus's mother and father went to "go get him" like they were his guardians (as if that's not humiliating). And all these pharisees (religious jewish leaders) were telling everyone, "Any 'miracle' that is being done through him is of evil spirits and the devil." and they were not even saying he was out of his mind but that he was "demon-possessed". Beelzebub is a name for "Prince of Demons".
So I guess I never thought of Jesus in that way, because not many pastors give a sermon about how Jesus became a ward of the court (in approximation) and entire communities told his parents to "come get him" and "take care of your mentally ill son".
If he wasn't being accused of being an alcoholic (wine-bibber, for having an occasional drink), or mentally ill, he was accused of being demon-possessed.
He would have been falsely arrested, sent to drug rehab without needing it, and put in a psych ward with the signature of his mom and dad. Most likely, the people who hated him most would have wanted him to be injected with Haldol.
Friday, January 27, 2012
today
I have no idea if anything I say at all will work in my favor or not, bc some things only God knows and sees and I make my mistakes in the open all the time.
Today I wore what was comfortable and have to change now, but I wore red plaid pj bottoms under my grey pants and a orange shirt and rose blue and pink and green and purple shirt over it and my cambodia tee underneath and then 2 grey tops over and black gloves and blue and yellow socks.
On the surface, different shades of grey and underneath, many colors. I even carried my yellow keys. so every color, accidentally.
Interesting things from scripture but have to go for now. will write about it later
Today I wore what was comfortable and have to change now, but I wore red plaid pj bottoms under my grey pants and a orange shirt and rose blue and pink and green and purple shirt over it and my cambodia tee underneath and then 2 grey tops over and black gloves and blue and yellow socks.
On the surface, different shades of grey and underneath, many colors. I even carried my yellow keys. so every color, accidentally.
Interesting things from scripture but have to go for now. will write about it later
Torture 4 Obstructing Justice & Hacking Laptop
. I have had someone really causing disruption to my laptop service and normal internet function for about the last 2 weeks especially. It has been since I've been working on the OIG complaint and most especially when I quit bleeding and then attempted to write more (but didn't get very far).
I have been tortured all day today. The entire day.
The only time the U.S. quit was when I was taking photos tonight of some things. If I take benign photos that have nothing to do with my hearings for my son, or trying to get work done on legal things, they don't torture me. They let me take photo after photo. This is a pattern that has repeated several times.
I once thought it was that they just quit torturing me if I took photos of myself because they stopped then, but no, they quit torturing me if I'm taking art photos, house photos, whatever.
They torture me all day and night if I do anything at all that has to do with my son. They torture me using technology if I am doing research for any case that has anything to do with him.
It's not just my son that they want to keep kidnapped and tortured and used for CIA and military reasons. They are obstructing justice to protect criminals who refused to do their job and concealed evidence.
I just spent over 2 hours taking photos and the entire time, they quit torturing me. Before I did this, all day they tortured me. When I started looking up internet stuff for my son's hearing and legal case, as soon as I quit taking photos, they started torturing with technology again. They have done this every single time I have ever taken photos for a length of time. From Wenatchee, WA to TN to here, they stop torturing if I'm taking photos.
All day today they used technology that affected my heart specifically, and then this DJ tonight makes some odd comment about heart stuff and how you have to have a beating heart still (out of blue, referring to nothing) and I got in my parents car and they were doing it the entire time I was in the vehicle.
Then, almost the entire time I was walking when I walked to the hospital and back to pick up records.
Basically, they're following me in my house, tracking my parent's vehicle to torture with technology (a moving vehicle) and then tracking me while I walk, away from my house and miles away from it.
I was surprised they were doing this in my parents vehicle. At different times today and last night, I went to my parent's porch and even if they were not home, their house was buzzing with ink-bursts-out-of-pens technology. Then on top of that, they've been using something else that basically sucks on the heart, like it pulls it out of it's normal place.
No I'm not kidding. It's some form of technology that specifically targets the heart bc it doesn't feel like it affects any other organs and it lifts it up out of place and feels like it's being suctioned. I have no idea how a technology would only target the heart and not other liquid dense organs like liver or kidney too. When they've used ultrasound and the microwave or MRI that causes twitching in me and my son, it's not just the heart but other related organs feel it.
This is something they are using that is targeting the heart specifically and it is literally suctioning it upwards and then the ribs go in slightly concave a little from the pressure but mainly the actual heart is being pulled upwards. I have no metal near my heart so the only metal is in my neck, if someone taps into that and it can pull, I don't know.
But that's what they have been doing for several days in addition to all the other forms of torture they have used to prevent me from getting my son or proving my innocence.
It's not coming from the neighborhood though I am very sure someone could do this, it's coming skyward down. They did this ALL DAY today.
I got in my parents car and they had targeted my parent's vehicle and it was even worse in there than outside. And first they only did it while I was in one section of my house and then today, they followed me with it, almost every single place I went. Not everywhere, but almost everywhere.
This also causes my heart to speed up and beat faster than normal and I guess that's because it's stressed from being suctioned. It's like it's magnetized but unless I got something strange in the contrast from the CT, there should be nothing in my heart that would allow for this. Then a couple of times, I put my hand across the area and someone turned it off but not because it's coming from straight ahead. They are doing this skyward and monitoring my family in other ways.
And not only do they quit torturing me if I take photos of stuff, whether it's myself or art stuff, they actually try to "help". I am not kidding. Someone starts getting the focus better than it normally is, and it suddenly starts picking up detail this cam will not pick up usually. And colors get thrown in sometimes and added...most of it is my own but a few things someone else has done. And on top of that, they order my photos in sequences someone likes. Instead of going in the chronological order, they do themes.
What kind of WHACKED out people like to play with layout and organizing my photos thematically ...you know what it's like?
Silence of the Lambs.
It's like you have the most disturbing people in U.S. govt. giving orders to torture us and then if I take a photo break they get excited and into it and start playing around with it while humming I imagine. Like the sadist and cannibal Lector who hums and puts around the house like nothing is wrong, and looks very normal and is even a psychologist with good career credentials. In his time while not working on surveillance and hacking into computers to arrange photos, he is torturing people while they still live and watching with a distant satisfaction. He-she, whoever.
This was the exact same thing that happened in Wenatchee and they didn't get in a van and park next door to camp in the woods and stake out our place to torture us as little mafia militia men.
No, they have the U.S. govt BACKING THEM and they are Hannibal Lectors.
I have even had my photos disappear from my post after I publish them, like they got deleted, and I find them again and someone gave them a new scroll number or whatever it is. You know, the string of letterrs and numbers.
I am not nuts and I was myself shocked to find they are targeting and following my parents vehicle. I have been in the car when other forms of technology were used when it was me and my mom, but I cannot believe these people don't quit.
It has nothing to do with govt. research. It's hate crime.
They don't care if I do something pointless.
They don't care if I humiliate myself.
They don't care if I work on photos.
They did care if I sang.
It is like my voice was too good for them and worried them because it was a gift that had been buried and they didn't want anyone to be "enchanted" or moved by my singing voice. They didn't want me singing worship songs either, after I'd said worship is a form of war preparation.
But they let me take photos because I guess they feel they can interface or be interactive on it. And probably because they know it's never going anywhere except for their own documentation. It's not like I'm going to make money off of my internet photos. They know I COULD have made money from singing and writing my songs (that some of them stole ideas from).
And they don't care if I take photos at all but if I do research, or even check my email and try to catch up, or sometimes blog, or try to work on legal matters, they turn off my light and shut down my electricity repeatedly, torture me so badly it runs me out of my house, and then I find out they have gimlets threatening my parents on the side.
They're torturing me to obstruct justice--not for research. They were doing this before I even had my son.
I have been tortured all day today. The entire day.
The only time the U.S. quit was when I was taking photos tonight of some things. If I take benign photos that have nothing to do with my hearings for my son, or trying to get work done on legal things, they don't torture me. They let me take photo after photo. This is a pattern that has repeated several times.
I once thought it was that they just quit torturing me if I took photos of myself because they stopped then, but no, they quit torturing me if I'm taking art photos, house photos, whatever.
They torture me all day and night if I do anything at all that has to do with my son. They torture me using technology if I am doing research for any case that has anything to do with him.
It's not just my son that they want to keep kidnapped and tortured and used for CIA and military reasons. They are obstructing justice to protect criminals who refused to do their job and concealed evidence.
I just spent over 2 hours taking photos and the entire time, they quit torturing me. Before I did this, all day they tortured me. When I started looking up internet stuff for my son's hearing and legal case, as soon as I quit taking photos, they started torturing with technology again. They have done this every single time I have ever taken photos for a length of time. From Wenatchee, WA to TN to here, they stop torturing if I'm taking photos.
All day today they used technology that affected my heart specifically, and then this DJ tonight makes some odd comment about heart stuff and how you have to have a beating heart still (out of blue, referring to nothing) and I got in my parents car and they were doing it the entire time I was in the vehicle.
Then, almost the entire time I was walking when I walked to the hospital and back to pick up records.
Basically, they're following me in my house, tracking my parent's vehicle to torture with technology (a moving vehicle) and then tracking me while I walk, away from my house and miles away from it.
I was surprised they were doing this in my parents vehicle. At different times today and last night, I went to my parent's porch and even if they were not home, their house was buzzing with ink-bursts-out-of-pens technology. Then on top of that, they've been using something else that basically sucks on the heart, like it pulls it out of it's normal place.
No I'm not kidding. It's some form of technology that specifically targets the heart bc it doesn't feel like it affects any other organs and it lifts it up out of place and feels like it's being suctioned. I have no idea how a technology would only target the heart and not other liquid dense organs like liver or kidney too. When they've used ultrasound and the microwave or MRI that causes twitching in me and my son, it's not just the heart but other related organs feel it.
This is something they are using that is targeting the heart specifically and it is literally suctioning it upwards and then the ribs go in slightly concave a little from the pressure but mainly the actual heart is being pulled upwards. I have no metal near my heart so the only metal is in my neck, if someone taps into that and it can pull, I don't know.
But that's what they have been doing for several days in addition to all the other forms of torture they have used to prevent me from getting my son or proving my innocence.
It's not coming from the neighborhood though I am very sure someone could do this, it's coming skyward down. They did this ALL DAY today.
I got in my parents car and they had targeted my parent's vehicle and it was even worse in there than outside. And first they only did it while I was in one section of my house and then today, they followed me with it, almost every single place I went. Not everywhere, but almost everywhere.
This also causes my heart to speed up and beat faster than normal and I guess that's because it's stressed from being suctioned. It's like it's magnetized but unless I got something strange in the contrast from the CT, there should be nothing in my heart that would allow for this. Then a couple of times, I put my hand across the area and someone turned it off but not because it's coming from straight ahead. They are doing this skyward and monitoring my family in other ways.
And not only do they quit torturing me if I take photos of stuff, whether it's myself or art stuff, they actually try to "help". I am not kidding. Someone starts getting the focus better than it normally is, and it suddenly starts picking up detail this cam will not pick up usually. And colors get thrown in sometimes and added...most of it is my own but a few things someone else has done. And on top of that, they order my photos in sequences someone likes. Instead of going in the chronological order, they do themes.
What kind of WHACKED out people like to play with layout and organizing my photos thematically ...you know what it's like?
Silence of the Lambs.
It's like you have the most disturbing people in U.S. govt. giving orders to torture us and then if I take a photo break they get excited and into it and start playing around with it while humming I imagine. Like the sadist and cannibal Lector who hums and puts around the house like nothing is wrong, and looks very normal and is even a psychologist with good career credentials. In his time while not working on surveillance and hacking into computers to arrange photos, he is torturing people while they still live and watching with a distant satisfaction. He-she, whoever.
This was the exact same thing that happened in Wenatchee and they didn't get in a van and park next door to camp in the woods and stake out our place to torture us as little mafia militia men.
No, they have the U.S. govt BACKING THEM and they are Hannibal Lectors.
I have even had my photos disappear from my post after I publish them, like they got deleted, and I find them again and someone gave them a new scroll number or whatever it is. You know, the string of letterrs and numbers.
I am not nuts and I was myself shocked to find they are targeting and following my parents vehicle. I have been in the car when other forms of technology were used when it was me and my mom, but I cannot believe these people don't quit.
It has nothing to do with govt. research. It's hate crime.
They don't care if I do something pointless.
They don't care if I humiliate myself.
They don't care if I work on photos.
They did care if I sang.
It is like my voice was too good for them and worried them because it was a gift that had been buried and they didn't want anyone to be "enchanted" or moved by my singing voice. They didn't want me singing worship songs either, after I'd said worship is a form of war preparation.
But they let me take photos because I guess they feel they can interface or be interactive on it. And probably because they know it's never going anywhere except for their own documentation. It's not like I'm going to make money off of my internet photos. They know I COULD have made money from singing and writing my songs (that some of them stole ideas from).
And they don't care if I take photos at all but if I do research, or even check my email and try to catch up, or sometimes blog, or try to work on legal matters, they turn off my light and shut down my electricity repeatedly, torture me so badly it runs me out of my house, and then I find out they have gimlets threatening my parents on the side.
They're torturing me to obstruct justice--not for research. They were doing this before I even had my son.
Thursday, January 26, 2012
My Mom's Papers and "81"
this is not a good photo. no date showing. let me take a different one.
I'm not putting a different one up. This is it. What I noticed, is that the U.S. tortured me unless I did something that means nothing, like take photos of things. If I try to research legal things or work on my case for my son, they torture me. The U.S. is torturing me all the way up to hearing deadlines and dates and makes it 100% impossible to get anything done. If I sidetrack and take photos of benign things that have nothing to do with my legal matters or son, they quit torturing me. They have been literally obstructing justice by using torture as a weapon.
I wrote my post about seeing Kate Middleton with smaller pieces of paper and hiding them or something after someone approached from behind and looked over her shoulder as she sat in a chair (her left side). She looked over her left shoulder.
I didn't tell my mom I had just blogged about it and then I went to the door to let her know I was going downtown to get something and said where there 30 or 31 days this month? couldn't remember and then said, "Oh yeah, do you have that calendar or something you said you give me?" (a free one from work or something).
She said she could get one but here was something for now. She handed me 2 rectangular pieces of cardboard or stiff paper that had calendars on it and they are perforated so you can tear them into card size. They had scripture verses on the back and photos of seashells by the ocean.
They are all the same, the photo, but the verses are different.
It's not what I saw in Kate's hands, and it wasn't cards either. Sort of a wallpaper effect like I was getting with FBI SACs Laura Laughlin's photo.
Any connection between the hidden pieces of paper and then my seeing FBI records about me in Kate's hands (separately?).
Maybe it's Patty Otterbach. Maybe it's Patty accessing FBI records and somehow getting them to Kate. There is also California--I'll bet she has a contact through CA or OR. Maybe WA.
Then I ran out to my parent's car and I realize now, they knew it was the left shoulder. I had thought they both just looked over their shoulder's, back at me, from the left bc they thought I was going to that side of the car but now I know, they knew what angle I got or they knew what I was going to write about tonight.
And they were sort of laughing and then said get in and I got dropped off to get cinnamon and dutch hot chocolate.
Something sort of detail-y from last night. I had to go out to the barn to flip a breaker bc my lights went out and I came back and this rock fell out from my shoe. I normally don't notice but it got my attention and I looked and it was perfectly V shaped. A total triangle rock. I mean, like it got cut out into a triangle and it was black. It was like an arrowhead.
I have NO idea what it means. This is totally separate from my mom's stuff or middletons or whatever. Just random stuff that's happened. So out of all the rocks and pebbles, this one got stuck in the sole of my shoe and came out with a noise and I bent over because it was this arrowhead shape. I stared and I am reeallly not a weirdo, but I thought, "That is sort of strange." So I thought, "God, is this supposed to mean something?"
I asked, because that day, yesterday, I had been led to several passages about how God sometimes (caution-operative word is *sometimes*) works.
It talked about Joseph saying how dare steal the cup my master drinks from and "divines" with and I thought "a divining cup?" and then thought usually it's bad about diviners but maybe God shows things sometimes in unusual ways. Then, i had also read about how this king solomon had a dreeam. I sort of thought it was not a dream but a vision he had or God speaking to him directly. But no, the question to Solomon about "what do you want?" came in a dream. Solomon answered in his dream and it was like it was real and then he woke up and noticed it was a dream. So sometimes people and technology manipulate things but I had thought well, sometimes God uses things to point to other things.
So I had put this penny on my kitchen table.
I had 4 pennies left after sorting out my change and wanting to change it for bills. So I had 4 pennies and put them in a jar. I hadn't looked at the dates and then I did and out of the 4 I picked out the one that was dated 1982.
I picked the 1982 one out, because I had asked FBI for FOIA going back to 1982, for me (just myself).
So I had it on the table and the other 3 in my jar with pens and pencils and then I came in from the barn and this triangular rock came out from my shoe and bc I had just read that day about how God sometimes shows things to people in different ways, I decided not to touch it and
(this DJ that just came on the radio, while I am being newly tortured with technology announced, "LIVE LIKE YOU'RE DYING BABY--GOOD ADVICE". Wasn't really pleasant actually)
So I didn't touch it and just stared and asked God, "Does this mean something? show me." So it was brought to my mind, "It is an arrow pointing to something".
I had just cleaned and swept my entire place and even the floor was pretty clean but I looked to see what it was pointing to and there was one tiny piece of paper on the ground. It was the size of half a fingernail. Just a tiny piece and I don't know if it got there by my other shoe or what but I hadn't noticed it bc it was so small.
It was one inch away or a couple inches away from the arrow. I picked it and turned it over. It said 81. It was just a number: 81.
It was white and blue stripes with the number 81. The stripes are vertical navy blue stripes and the number 81 is also navy blue. I just counted them and 6 stripes and a tiny part of another but mainly 6.
I thought, "81, not 82"
I picked it up and put it underneath the 1982 penny to straighten it out bc it was slightly curled at the corners. And I put the arrow next to it and thought, "What does this mean? anything?"
I sort of thought maybe it was to ask for FBI FOIA from 1981-forward, not 1982-forward. And then I also looked at what I had set it under and it was under my Thomas Train (which makes me think of my son and has the #1) and then my purple nailpolish which I was wearing and how I sometimes called myself the "8 ball". I don't know, that's a stretch maybe. The first thing to my mind was to go back 1 year and ask the FBI for more.
And when it dried it wasn't black. It's a grey arrow. The color of the rock is gray/grey. And then the other thing was that I waited to see if there was anything to "divine" in my saucepan.
Someone work with me here. I mean, tolerate me. I wasn't "divining"...I just thought, God, I don't get it but is there something you could show me in my saucepan? it is not a cup but whatever. Sometimes God does weird things and i don't do spells or witchcraft. Truly. Well there was sort of something but it would sound too weird.
I was just taking a few photos of it and thinking, yes, I think it's for 1981.
I just got this letter from the FBI and then the Office of Information, denying my request for FOIA from 1982-present. It was given a number.
If I go back 1 year, it's a separate request. It gives me another chance to make a stronger argument over the same material but designate it differently.
Maybe God knows something that I don't about that year too, 1981.
There was nothing else on the ground when the rock fell out. It was just the piece of paper. Which is only strange in that my mother has all this ticking in crimson and white or cream for curtains and then I found this on the ground with blue stripes instead of crimson. Maybe it's pointing to a criminal...
We'll see.
I know to go back to 1981 with the FBI.
Why 1981 instead of 1982?
What's weird is that I looked happy in my school photos still, in 1981.
Well, I take that back. In my kindergarten photo, in my green polka-dotted dress, I was pouting. I wanted a pink dress with lace and ribbons and frills and stared at this polka dot creation like "Are you KIDDING ME?"
I still remember how excited Granny and my mother were, over that polka-dot dress. I sort of ruined it forever. It was the last dress made for me. I really did throw a fit. It was all they could do to persuade me to wear it just once, for my school photo.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)