images

violets under the weeping willow
one wave of the hand a smear to the right
oils and my canvas white and then muddied
best part of the whole scene is me
i should be in the portrait
nothing looks very good, nothing that i've done
but i am dancing with my hands covered in oil paints
and there is a pattern of green over red
mustard yellow under purple
and i am dancing to loud music, spilling paint
onto the glass table.
mixing acrylics to sponge out the oil for a chalky and rough sky
the landscape, the shapeshifting, the clouds making a design
hearts to break, souls to take, something in the making
always creating wine from water, oil from spit, diamonds from glass
gold molten, throwing in all the rings for the refiners fire
and saving the fake stuff for a trophy of what i knew
and held my head up to
the best part of art is not the final product
it's the process
leaving all the brushes out to dry
oops...not one for details
but they look so nice all messy that way
i want to sell the easle with the paints and brushes
in array and disturbed as Art Itself
********************************************************************

bedsheet upon my head,
dragging it behind me
my veil, for my 3rd grade wedding
i am marrying! i have a veil upon my head
or rather, do i look a little dead,
dragging the sickly white sheet behind me
which is scraping up the gum and dust along the aisle
as i move to the beating of my own drum
this dirty, dirty, nasty thing in the woodshed!
aha! hahahaaaaaa...madness med mad hatters head
ahaaaahaaa-ha-ha-ha!
i've cracked up again
and left the sheet behind for the cutters
such an old maid i must be
gleefully looking at what i've left behind
the miserly man is wearing my fucking bra
i want it back fucker
oh fine, woman, you keep it muthahfuckah
your boobs were always bigger than mine
and my balls always beat yours
i drive you better than you drive me
drove you fucking crazy
black under the eyes from the concealment of your sin
**********************************************************

alzheimers
sorry mommie dearest and dearly devoted
you've not been so devoted as to NOT notice
the way granny picks tiny little bits of cheese apart
and puts them into a design onto a half slice of bread
arranging the little pieces for 15 minutes until they cover
the bread just right
spite? no. i was the one arguing for the assistant to come in
and help but no, all the apples falling from the tree are not
money enough for thee to consider
the flight of imagination that a disease takes reigns of
one minute granny is so happy to see me
the next, irritably asking why i'm looking at her medications
to see if anyone cares enough to try to get her
something that will slow the train down
granny doesn't remember if she just called grandpa about 5 minutes ago
but NO! she's just OLD!
she doesn't have alllzzzzzzzzzzzzzheeeeeeeeeeeeeeiiiiiiiiiiimmmmmmeeeeeeeeeers.
she doesn't remember if i was living with them 2 weeks ago or 2 years ago
but NOooooooooooooooooooo! it's NOT alzheimers
come on people
smell the fucking chocolate chip cookies burning in the oven
because granny forgot she was cooking
oh, shit...that's a little bit like meeee....
*******************************************************

why did you do it?
the muthahfuckah put GUM on the bottom of all of my shoes
pink bubblicious
sat around chewing the cud and gum, and when i wasn't looking
affixing the gum to my shoes
try walking in heels with sticky gum on your shoes
he was always lagging behind, following me
kicking aside the stringy bits that were stringing HIM along
poor man, he had a mess of a web on the front of his loafers
and sneakers
that gumshoe had gum on the TOP and front of his shoe
just from trying to keep it clean
like i didn't notice how i couldn't turn when i wanted to turn
because i was stuck to the floor
i saw the fucking gum
i was chewing my own wads, and he was stuck with what he'd started
even when he wanted to pull away he couldn't
even now, he can't
even now, he misses me and all my gum.
no one gonna give it bettah Bum.
****************************************************

drops falling into a puddle
teakettle on the stove
old japanese movie teakettle
petals of lotus falling from the sky
petals from the maple tree
ice skating on the frozen pond
sharks and goldfish red swimming beneath
drill is coming
drill to the oil earth
cracking the ice sending coats and skirts and boots
sliding down like harris landslide
taking all the avalanche has to offer
pulling down down a golden chain
like a daisy chain slipping beneath the surface
games are over but they go
quietly, holding hands as they sink one by one
falling into something deeper than
they realize they had taken on
something deeper grabbed the fuckers
by the fragile ankles which were
kicking down and beating the defenseless
fragile ankles being broken by
the jaws of the machine
something crying from the depths
a child crying
the voice of my son
you will bow to the my son
you will bow and pray for forgiveness and you will
apologize to
the one
this whip is snaking out like a sprung coil
lashing out and latching onto the ankles of those
who walk on thin ice who brag and gloat sitting on high
these are coming down
to beg for the forgiveness of my son
you will not survive without his forgiveness
karma
will get you
eat you alive
and strike you dead while you are sleeping
where is your blood for the door now?
your blood of the lamb?
where is your blood now.