My food and water have been tampered with in the last several months. I'm sure occasionally before that, but I've done experiments on my water supplies and different bottled water I purchased locally and found disturbing results.
I did a basic seed sprout and found sometimes seeds were not only not sprouting at all, they were shriveling up and dying. That was several months ago, and I returned a bunch of water because of it.
I also had to throw out an entire bag of teff flour because it was tampered with before I ever got it. I thought against pre-ordering an entire bag of teff flour, because with what has been done to me already, I knew it might be possible someone would have advance time to do something to it. Sure enough, that is exactly what happened. I didn't use it right away, because I had a feeling something was wrong with it. I kept it sealed up and off the ground in a cupboard. I checked on it, because I moved it from one place to the next. Then all of a sudden, the rest of my house was fine, no problems with mold on any of my food or house, and this bag started to produce bizarre mold designs in yellow and green on the package. It was from inside of the bag, and spreading out to the bag. It was forming in circles, basically, a large solid yellow spot, and then a green spot, and yellow spot, slightly irregular, but not like mold usually grows. It looked like someone had sprayed the outside of the bag with something that contained mold spores. Since it was only on one section, and just the outside, I wondered at first if something got on the outside of the bag. Basically, I ordered it, and it less than a month to arrive and then I left it at the store until I had a place cleared to store it.
I opened it up and threw out the entire area of mold and it was only on the bag by the flower design, so and the rest was far enough away and looked untouched. So I put it into separate plastic bags and sealed them and then waited. I made a small loaf of bread with it, and one batch of "pasta" and that was it. I mixed it with regular flour, so I only had a very small amount of the teff overall, and then I noticed, it was growing inside the bags too, that were sealed.
So I threw all of it out.
I saw this one man in a truck driving at a distance the day I walked there to order it or pick it up, I don't remember and even though I'm near-sighted, a little, I could see he was upset and didn't want me to get it. I then realized, "There are others who know I have cause to be concerned about making advance orders for food in this country." People know that I've been targeted for various things and falsely arrested, so they know. I"m typically scrupulous about what I buy and where, and making sure it's sealed, but this one time I thought maybe I could try it.
What was the yellow and green idea for? Symbolic of someone's "colors" or something? It was clearly a man-made job and not something that occured because of improper storage.
I didn't put any of it in my garden at all. I threw all of it into a burn stack. I had flowers go there too, because they had fertilizer on them and were not organic. The only things I've put in my garden are non-toxic, non-pesticide, and organic. Just because it's compost doesn't mean it doesn't matter. That same compost provides nutrients for the soil that then grows food that I eat, and while I eat non-organic foods too sometimes, if I have a organic I said was organic, that is how it is.
I really think it is time to garden somewhere else and I'm looking forward to being a gestational surrogate.
There is nothing that I've eaten or not taken care over, that would affect any unborn child, and I seal everything in my house anymore. I even watched the teff flour and I used only about 1 cup of it, mixed in with other things, from a section at the top that was far from the mold, but if there was any mold in that, it wasn't enough to harm me, and it was cooked, or boiled, and I threw the rest out.
As for my water, I test it. I test it to see if sprouts grow from seeds like normal, as they should, or if something else happens.
I'm currently doing a repeat test to confirm my results this time. I've done this, testing water samples, oh, maybe about 4 different times now (in the past year), using a variety of kinds of water.
And my sauerkraut turns out like a charm every time. I started making it for natural, vegan lactic acid, and good bacteria, and it always turns out great. The seal on the jars is always there, it pops at turn of the lid, and it bubbles out over the top like champagne when it's opened because of the good build-up. It takes a month or so to get it to do this, but I have constant success with my sauerkraut, which then means I don't have to buy vegan acidophilus or lactic acid at the store--I make it myself.
Half of my hair didn't fall out from teff flour. I hadn't even opened it yet.
I got extremely sick from a water source when I did my try for a 40 day fast. It was H2O earth water that McKays had in the store and had back stock of, which I picked up. It's Oregon-sourced. It is the only thing that mattered because I wasn't eating, and something had been done to my batch of water. I didn't lose my hair over it though. I tested the water and seeds were dying, not sprouting.
Then I picked up Smart Water and at the time over half of my hair fell out, I had changed or added only a few different things to what I was doing, that could have affected anything. I wasn't using food from the food bank or anything. When I started getting Smart Water, I had no problem with it and I was getting it from the local Safeway. Then one day someone had no Smart Water in packs on the shelf so I had to get some from the back and someone picked out a pack for me and gave it to me. Aside from the back-stock package of SmartWater I picked up, there were no other variables. No new or different vitamins, minerals, or herbs...nothing. So the only variables were 1. torture, severe torture, repeatedly, to the top of my head, 2. Smartwater pack given to me by a sales clerk from a back stock, 3. some fried onion ring chips I had that were on their own, for Thanksgiving, and that's it.
After this, I was buying Smartwater in single bottles, and no problem with that, and then my parents were being pressured to have me pick up a pack of Dasani waiting for me at McKays. I don't know what their weird problem was, but it was a bizarre "issue" to some people, for me to be drinking Smartwater. I know it sounds weird, but I had looks of resentment. I really don't care about brands and all of that--I try to go with whatever is safe, and even looked at getting a distillation machine (high tech-industry level) myself for alcohol-distillation (takes out alcohol from tinctures and then you add glycerin to it so it's alcohol-free homeopathic medicine) and water distillation. So then I was going to stick with Smartwater, and buy single bottles or something, and just watch what I do, and how it affects me or grows.
I had tested Dasani in the past, and the seeds sprouted great! There was no problem at all, with a certain supply of Dasani that I had, and I had good results. Then I was being pressured to pick up a pack waiting for me at McKays, and I got it home, and I still have a whole case of it. I didn't drink it because I had a feeling, by the way some were acting, that they wanted me to have that water for a reason.
So I've tested this batch and the seeds are not sprouting like they did before. Which is possibly a concern.
If my body is a living organism, which requires water to grow and live, and grow new cells and DNA, I need good water just like sprouting seeds do. So I test for normal results and if I don't see nornal results, it raises questions for me.
It's not that this batch of Dasani isn't sprouting seeds at all, but it's taking a lot longer than some other kinds of water. So I'm retesting and will let you know what the results are.
There were very very few factors that contributed to the sudden hair loss of more than half of my hair and it wasn't the teff flour, because I didn't even try it.
It was a specific package of Smartwater, something left in a bag of fried onion rings at my parents house (unlikely, but I was the one who asked to have some to add to my plate, after they were set aside and there were only a few left), and severe constant torture to the top of my head by use of military and NASA technology. It was most likely torture, and that is why I said it was from torture.
Anyway, there is nothing I eat or drink that isn't good for me or would affect a baby, or I wouldn't be looking into it. If I didn't think I would do a better job than most people, 99%, I wouldn't be excited about it. If I just wanted money, there are many different things I could do for quick money, and that I've been offered money for, and I turned down those options because I'm not enthusiastic about it, or I had cause to doubt when contracts were broken.
My word is pretty much, a contract in writing, if I say this is how I understand it to be. But if someone negates that verbal contract ahead of me, they just dissolved the whole thing and now they are at their own risk. If I say I'll do something, and I have the deal agreed to with the other party, I follow-through. I even give time for recommitment at a certain point, but if someone first breaks the contract on their own, and tries to sneak it past me thinking I don't know, and then makes no serious effort to recommit or go back to the original agreement (i.e., don't cheat on me), then that's it. You cut yourself out.
I see marriage agreements as business contracts. And the way I treat a marriage prospect is no different than I would treat a business arrangment. Which is why I already know I have no problem nurturing someone else's unborn child, and then giving it to them. I keep my word, generally speaking.
I'm not the business woman who says, "Yeah, I'll keep taking you back cheater." This is why I have zero tolerance for the Department of Justice and FBI shenanigans. If they had a policy of no corruption and no tolerance for torture, my family would never have been tortured.
My feeling is this...I am hardly the jealous type. So I have no problem with men appreciating other women. But if I say, "Here is where you no longer cheat on me", even if I know you would rather be with Ms. Dental Delight, you go right ahead thinking about Dental Delight and make your plans to be with her. If I find out you cheated on me? You just voided the contract, which means now I am no longer obligated to keep my money in your bank account. It means, if I have the money, I'll hire the private detective to collect evidence, and then I will arrange to have everything we jointly shared, taken away from you and deposited with me, via my lawyers.
It's not the other way around. Cheaters and those who try to sneak around agreements, don't get to further victimize the person they humiliated publicly.
If, for some reason, I like you still, even after you lied and tried to sneak around me, I might hold an open door still, with the requirement of needed more time, which gives you a chance to regain my trust.
I have firm principles about how I negotiate and conduct business and how I should be treated, and with what kind of respect I feel my partners should have from me.
What this country hasn't done, is deliver on any of its promises.
Contract, void. Stealing my son from me? Huge mistake. HUGE.
As to marriage, I can sort of understand a situation where one person is cheating because they try to be intimate with their spouse and the spouse refuses. That spouse who refuses is pretty much invalidating their own marriage contract if it's constant refusal. I don't mean marriage rape is okay, I am just saying, the spouse who refuses to be intimate and then tries to accuse their partner of breaking a contract by cheating, is liable for the same thing--not holding to the general agreement. That's my opinion. If I'm providing intimacy every single day (or, for some it's agreed on a lesser basis), and yet you still choose to go outside of the agreement to be with someone else, I was faithful and you are not. It means, I take everything you own, Ivana Trump style, and you do NOT take anything from me--you don't get your "gifts" to me back, you don't get anything back.
When Carmen got a lawyer and took everything from my brother, her reason was that my brother cheated on her. She broke their marriage contract first, with frigidity. She got married and they had sex maybe one time every 3 months, because of her. In 7 years of marriage, she only wanted to have sex a few times but then she accused my brother of cheating on her. Even if he did, which wasn't right, what she did wasn't right either and basically negated and annulled the contract of their marriage. For her to then feel self-righteous and take everything from my brother, was something only a spy would do. Who did she work for? U.S. Army.
This country, has broken its contract repeatedly, and then attempted to put blame on me and accuse me of all kinds of false things. The U.S. is guilty of treason against me and my son.
My son has been illegally taken from me and if this country and FBI was following the law, and if the Department of Justice amounted to anything at all, they would be returning my son to me.
How about it.
In a surrogacy agreement comparison, cheating on the contract might be something like this: You agree to contract as a surrogate and sign documents and before this, you agreed verbally to do certain things for health and activity and to prepare for the child. The man whose sperm you are being injected with, has already promised he is HIV-free. You find out later, after you were injected, that he is not only not HIV-free, he is AIDS positive and just gave you AIDS. It wasn't that you would have turned him down possibly, if he had a form of some problem, and if screened, everything was okay, but no, he deliberately endangered your life and lied and now you have AIDS.
You kept your agreement, and didn't lie or say anything that endangered someone's health or safety. You kept all verbal contracts that really mattered.
If the surrogate then says she changed her mind, did she break the contract? or did the man who lied and gave her AIDS break the contract. She lives with AIDS now, and her prospects are meager, and she doesn't have long to live. Her fiance or husband broke up with her or divorced her, because of the AIDS.
On top of this, now the man is trying to take everything she owns from her, and the police, U.S. military, FBI and CIA and Department of Justice people all think it's great. She's getting what she deserved.
Right. Like being tortured with AIDS every day wasn't their fault.
Common sense. I deal in clear-cut, common sense, terms and those who work best with me, are as respecful of me as I am of them.
They don't say, after injecting me with AIDS several times, "I think we want to call it off now, but you had a good experience right?" while slobbering over a Taylor Swift magazine cover.
I don't need your YEAST issues.
How ironic that as I was being nonconsensually treated for thrush that started with the birth of my son, they brought another kind of yeast to my life. And then they and their friends think they have a right to try to take revenge. My thrush was from my breastfeeding my child and is only a rash, it's not the nasty vaginal cheese yeast that the other women brought with them. I don't get that kind of cheese, ever, unless someone is unfaithful to me and tries to contaminate me with the cheese of some strange woman.
Alvaro worked for the FBI and he was the one bringing me my food. Before that, it was the federal Post Pub. By the way, what kind of weird hypocrisy is it for Chris Dabney to make a big deal about my washing his clothes and bedding, but then he bragged LATER about how his Jewish girlfriend cleaned the entire house's kitchen. So they really liked her, because she cleaned all their kitchen crap. So he doesn't mind having someone invade the personal products of himself and every other person in an entire house (of at least 3-4 others), but he had an issue with my laundering his dirty sheets. I had to sleep on those sheets and I washed them and threw in a few of his shirts. He made a huge deal over it, and got mad at me and banished me from the house. But then he was later bragging about how his Jewish girlfriend cleaned the whole kitchen and everyone liked it. ?
All they did was play mind games and use me. It was one form of humiliating me after another.
Non-consensual medication by the government who used getting into my pants their way into continued medical research against me.
I had no idea that The Post Pub was BZ Edgewood (The New Yorker, Dec 17, 2012). Read the article called "Operation Delirium".
There is probably no one out there, in another country, that could understand what kind of gestational surrogate I would be, but I still try. It's not all love-and-bunnies-and-puppies thoughts right now for me, for a good reason. So if you want an activist child with a lot of adrenaline, maybe go for my womb. In general, I bring laughter and a lot of peace and gentleness to the child I carry, and prayer, but but since I would be transistioning from living here to living somewhere else to carry the pregnancy, I would have to shift somewhat, with my thinking, but since I'm still dealing with things, sure, maybe it would be an activist. My son was born with immense amounts of love for others and happiness. He was happy, was the best and most remarkable thing. Did he ever love me to death and have a sense of safety and trust with me. But if someone is worried my thoughts may affect their unborn, I guess if you are an activist and intellectual, you won't mind.
Which one do you want? Snooky vaginal cheese lady or the baby breastfeeding rash lady?
It looks like cream cheese doesn't it? I can't say it's happened to me more than 3 times in my life, each time related to what some unfaithful man was bringing to my house.
What beautiful flora! She's overflowing with the flora!
How many women with vaginal yeast infections walk through business and stores every single day and touch the hands and persons of men, women, and children, and yet I have some people accusing me of being "unclean" for having an external rash due to breastfeeding my son. It is not even something I or my son should have had to deal with at all, had we been treated for a normal occurance like any other person was at that federally funded U.S.A. clinic.
Who is unclean?
The hypocrites are unclean. Go wash your heart.
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