Well I have no idea if P.T. is married already or with someone or what. I looked up a Brown U. profile a couple of years ago and was one time and that was all. So, not keeping up at all, but since he came to mind and I was writing about why, in an update on my last post about music...Well, I don't understand the process...
But I wrote about it and moved on. THEN, I just randomly thought about grabbing these "angel guidance" cards I have which I haven't used at all and it's not serious to me at all and to me, they're not even "the real thing" BUT! so I was doing it for fun alone, and I pulled the top card for me and got a "Have Confidence" card. For me and then I thought, and prayed to God, "Hmm, if I were to take cards with a question, what should it be about?" and Philip came to mind so I asked about his life, not that these are very elaborate cards. I pulled 3 of them and laid them out and all three are romantic love cards. Which is quite a solid streak.
These cards, this deck, does not have a lot of romantic love cards. But I just pulled 3 for him and I laid them down and they are:
Wedding: (they have words) Marriage is the union of two souls joined in love, mutual respect, and commitment. It signifies a desire to deepen love over time. Your wedding day is a testament to your well-founded faith in love's power. Continually breath life into that faith and love, Dearest One.
Law of Attraction: Each thought is an investment that pays immediate dividends, so invest wisely. You have the power to choose your thoughts and align them with love, peace, and harmony. At your request, we will gladly attune your energies to higher frequencies."
Cupid: "We send great waves of love into your heart and mind, awakening your love for life itself. Your clear decision to accept and enjoy romance has triggered this reawakening. Allow yourself to spontaneously celebrate love in all of its glorious aspects."
But they are sort of reversed I think, because I would think cupid would be first, and then law of attraction and then wedding but maybe it's just an overall idea. They are in reverse order so it might be the idea in general.
I just counted the cards and there are 43 of them. Only 3 are specifically about romantic love and he got all 3. I forget what that's called...a flush?
There are 3 other cards which are about love or new partners, but they could be used for work partners, business partners, or other things and other 2 about love or heart apply to family or friends or anything. The only ones which specifically refer to ROMANTIC love, P.T. got. He got all of them. So something about a relationship maybe, one way or the other, or future. Maybe something will be backwards in some way. I don't know. I don't take it seriously, it's more for fun.
These cards are from Doreen Virtue, "Angels" oracle cards.
I usually think no big deal, but with these odds, I wonder. Like with the other ones, when I kept seeing repeating odds, it makes you wonder.
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The other thing I got, for just myself, was that I opened up a scripture devotional thing today and it fell on "Mozart's Pet Bird" which made me smile because I have been playing PacMan to Mozart piano concertos. First it was tupac & eminem's "dear mama II" over and over and then the last few days, it's been Mozart piano concertos over and over, usually with Horowitz.
You know you've been playing PacMan a lot when you're rounding a corner on a sidewalk and this guy is rounding the corner on the other side and joining up with you and you suddenly see yourself on a PacMan grid. I looked at this man, who came up just like one of those guys going around a corner and meeting up and I said the same thing, something like, as I was laughing, "That just reminded me of PacMan, the way you came around the corner...I think I've been playing too much PacMan." and he totally laughed out loud, as I continued, "seriously, that just reminded me of one of those guys, when they come up around the corner and meet up at the same time...It's like we're on a PacMan grid." and he was just laughing with me. It's true! It really was like that.
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It's from this "Our Daily Bread" devotional that I had for June/July/August 2010. It's the one for August 19th and is a thing about how Mozart was inspired to write music from the melodies of birds. Then, my random mind thought about the title of this devotional and how someone gave it to me after I'd had 2 pieces of bread sitting atop a candle for a couple of days. I thought, "I guess they thought I was putting out a sign for manna." I think I had intended to make a sandwich and got distracted. It wasn't for any reason at all.
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Now listening to "Mosque in Munique" on NPR. Listened to John Tesh a little and turned to this program at the moment it began and it's spy stuff so listening. Before that, mainly worship music and stuff about Br. Andrew, whose book I read when I was little, about taking Bibles into Russia.
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Then, because I was thinking about J.T. I had J.P. come to mind and pulled three cards for him and got "trustworthy guidance (about following a trustworthy idea), relationship (having a primary relationship w/God), and entrepreneur (self employment as suitable for the personality of this person).
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For myself, I pulled 3 more aside from the have confidence card and got
"new partner", "see only love", and "the ocean" but it doesn't resonate with me exactly bc there is no new partner, and if i see only love i'm blinded by deceit, and the ocean is so far away...the closest thing to the ocean here would be a big conch shell. I think I'll draw again. Go fish (me).
Now there is this program about kidnapping insurance. Hmmm. Can I relate or what. You know, having been a hostage in my lifetime. It's not just about kidnapping insurance but about kidnapping stories. It's not just about traditional kidnappings but other situations where it's an actual kidnapping, where someone is "kidnapped by a neighbor" or "kidnapped by love" but they are actually literally trapped in some situation. First they are talking about Colombian kidnappings by FARC (a specific group) and how people will "tune in" to the conversations between the captive and who they're communicating with. They're talking about prisoner exchange and how it's government negotiations. Then how this one girl was rescued by Colombian military in 2000. Then it's going to be a story about being held hostage by only paperwork. They also said in the beginning, that if you have kidnapper's insurance, not to let anyone know, called it first rule of "Fight Club" (I haven't seen the movie for a long time).
So then it's about a couple being served eviction papers unjustly and having to fight a weird paperwork hostage situation which affected their living situation and lives. Then their stuff would be missing or someone would put weird yellow caution tape up to freak them out. Then, she did some investigation and found she wasn't alone but other people were being affected too.
They had a problem where the city wouldn't help and the police wouldn't help. A $10,000 cost ended up over $90,000.
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I checked on some things. But first, this is such a cool program to hear. It's very strange. In this town, that's what is going on with me and my son. But people from out of the area are involved too.
I believe the sadness I had this afternoon was due to my son and someone around him. It might have been about something else, but I think it was about my son.
I checked on my federal housing program and how I was kicked out of this without grounds and the CLEAR woman I talked to, knew there is a legal problem. But she was saying I might have only recourse--to sue, which people here and other places would know I don't have time to do. Forcing me out of housing is nothing new in this area. They do this to people from out of area who try to start up businesses, even in nearby towns. But this is a very concentrated effort to have me without a normal living situation or apartment. And I know at least one guard with Chelan County has been part of the harassment and infliction of distress regarding offering housing (and having no good reason not to) and then refusing, to put me in a bad position.
I was given a referral, so hopefully someone here will either convince them to ammend their decision or just sue, but I think everyone knows I will not find a lawyer here who is going to sue on my behalf. I have perfect grounds to sue, but not enough resources to do it in a timely manner.
This effectively puts me in a position of having a group trying to force me out of town and out of having my son. So that I cannot get work or housing, and even have been discriminated against and retaliated against on basic housing, which puts me in a bad position, which works out well for a lot of people in this area who do not want me to be financially independent in any way, and want to find any excuse for keeping my son from me.
Community Action has then taken federal monies, for prevention of homelessness, and done the exact opposite with those monies and not only tried to create a homeless situation, but retaliated and knowing anyone who is "homeless" and going through custody, is not in a position of filing their own lawsuit, and knowing it won't be possible to find a lawyer to do a suit when everyone is so tied-in here. To me, when enough ends meet, it's RICO. It's basic collusion and obstruction of justice and makes all of these "church-goers" come across like mobsters and who knows who is pulling the strings. But it suddenly makes these programs about "what causes homelessness" ludicrous. It should be an obvious explanation. The traditional ideas and theories should hold and then you bring in a situation like this, which is happening in modern day America and yet goes back to the Potato Famine in Ireland. Why were the Irish "homeless"? Take someone's property from them, and without normal legal assistance or enforcements, they will lose everything and that's common sense. My situation is the result of perpetual theft of my personal property, and then this would include my son, whom I was guardian of. One doesn't look at the situation in Canada, where one religious group (i guess catholics) were driving out the Protestants, and then Ireland, where Protestants were driving out Catholics (or, as one man put it, it's more about political ideals than religioun even, and it just so happens that politics sometimes align with certain religious groups). If someone is viewed as a threat, or a challenge even, here, they are driven out. How my son was taken is unbelievable and completely illegal.
Then, I have all these Navy people around me or approaching and I heard something about the Navy in this general area, back East, but I won't say what or who said it. However, Michelle Erickson has a few people on her friends list, including some Navy.
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Read Princess News for first time in awhile. Just glanced at headlines but no reading. A lawyer talking about arms and explosive diary. Not surprised at all though maybe a little more to it all than that, who knows. Not investigating right now. Then, I was just thinking, "I want to hear a song Di would like!" and I changed the station at that moment and got Elton John! It was "Yellow Brick Road".
I read this news and got the song right after I flipped to The Bible and read whatever I got. I got one passage in OT and one in the NT. For OT it was 2 Sam 24:18, about how David refused to build an altar to the Lord unless it cost him something personally because otherwise it wouldn't be a real or true sacrifice. Then I got Luke 2:41 and it's about Mary finding her son Jesus in the temple and he says basically, "Where else would I be found?"
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I also thought this morning or yesterday, the guy with the fedora and glasses and drumming on the "emilio estevez" clip or whatever, wasn't emilio. THAT guy was John Cusack. That is who matched the woman I had just met. But for some reason, I guess somethign about emilio too. Who knows. I couldn't relate, with that clip except to think "I guess there was that male nurse in SLC who was hitting on me when I was sitting there with a split scalp and hadn't even had stitches yet and he wanted to take me with him to Lake Tahoe."
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The other thing I should add for tonight, is that I was thinking about other people and I saw someone crying. An image or impression of it. A younger man, 22-35.
I also, separately, prayed for healing for someone with a terminal illness, or that's been called terminal, for healing.
Also, totally separately, I saw some sort of, but I think it was partly my own imagination because I had heard about Bibles and the "sword of truth" this morning and so I think possibly this influenced my thoughts maybe or how they turned out. But I saw this large rock, just one, where someone was rubbing two sticks together on it, well, at first it looked like a sword in a rock, like the king arthur legend in a way, or exactly I guess, and yet I thought it looked like it was to split it open for water, so I had this strange combo of a sword in a rock but then it was like striking the rock for water (from OT) and then it was like twisting sticks on top of a rock like for kindling fire. There is someone I sort of know who was working shoveling gravel and small rocks, but this had nothing to do with that. I don't know what it was, it was either small tools or something? But it was the motion of rubbing sticks (I don't know what was in the hands) together back and forth between the palms of hands and on top of an object that looked like a rock or was the size and shape of one, a large boulder or something.
There have been some good worship songs tonight. One I had totally forgotten about but it was one of my favorites: We Will Meet In The Golden City and then some others and some new ones. This one about Jesus, Son Of David (have mercy on me) i don't completely love but I was thinking about that idea, and that oh yeah, Jesus WAS a descendent of David. I had forgotten for a minute but thought it was sort of cool how I got the passage about David making an altar and then Jesus in the temple.****
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Oh my gosh. This really made me laugh out loud: this car flying out of the airport and the way they describe this is so funny...
http://edition.cnn.com/video/#/video/us/2010/06/05/nr.dallas.flying.car.cnn?hpt=C2
just saw it.
The other thing I forgot to say, to be fair, was that after being assaulted, I was calm and polite in general but then at one point, when I was being surrounded after trying to just sit down and go on like nothing happened, I was basically being confronted so I left, but I did give this one guy the finger. I did and I shouldn't have. So that was wrong, although otherwise I had amazing self control and dignity in the middle of such a horrible thing. BUT, I thought about it with my mind's eye trying to see my own raised eyebrows...no, not really, but thinking..."Hey! I flipped him off with my LEFT HAND!" Here I am, having been assaulted for the 2nd time in 1 day, with military or other technology, and having been harassed and followed around besides, and then threatened, and I just walked out of a place calmly thinking to myself, "I used my LEFT hand! huh! I wonder why I did that? Did I do that because I've been using it for video games? so now it's becoming more natural?" I don't know. I do know that I thought it had felt very natural but then I was questioning why I did it later.
Like that's the most important thing...I was thinking like some kind of just-been-assaulted-absent minded professor. I think I did pretty well, under the circumstances. I guess being assaulted and harassed is becoming no big deal to me. I'm like, "TAZER me you bahstahds." as I cooly walk out flipping the bird with my left hand and inhaling on a cigarette with my right. Head high, one eyebrow raised and walking out with back errect, not a tear in sight. Just 2 Glaring Peacock Eyes buggahs.
The guy was all over me so I felt it was warranted when he was screening me as if he didn't know and then he told me, in a threatening tone, "I wouldn't do that if I were you KID."
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I like this worship "Oh Sweet Grace (or face?, has carried me)" will have to find out who sings it. I haven't heard this one before but I like it.
I am looking for it but can't find it. It sounded like a hymn but I don't know if it's old or a newer song but it would refrain: your sweet face, has carried me...and then change to your sweet grace, has carried me,
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I started feeling the sad vibe again about 20 minutes ago. I am not sure why. But I was looking for that one song and everything was fine but then I sensed something shifting.
Anyway, I like this song too, about "Hungry" by Katherine Scott and I know this one from memory. I really liked the sweet face one and it must be popular...it was such a good melody and refrain with those lyrics and I'm trying to find it under "lyrics" and "hymn" but can't yet. So I looked up this radio program, "lifeline" but I got the wrong one--one about a comic strip christian show or something so still trying to find program notes.
It's sort of shifting back. To not as sad. It's 10:30 approximately, right now PST. It was fine, everything was fairly level, and then I sensed it went down and shifted and someone I know or don't know or something or someone is suffering or sad. At least I felt that heaviness and I don't want this for those I care about.
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I had to change the station. I prayed and even though it's christian music, if something seems wrong I have to switch what I'm doing and find out why. I went to k-love after this and tried to look up the playlist and instead of getting the one for this week, I got the one for May 17, 2010. Which is when they tried to terminate my rights to my son or served me with papers. I believe it was before this that I was being assaulted at the house I lived at and medicated as well, and I guess that was before the vandalism.
Some of the stuff though, I had 2 other people who came into my apartment so I don't know. One was an "Adam" and the other was this other guy who did some weird things when he was there and stole one of my sweaters. Every single thing I did was being leaked to a lot of people, not just U.S. but UK and that was strange in itself. I have to believe there was money involved.
Anyway, almost everything I go to online is being directed as some kind of weird personal harassment, like the ads I've had in the past and that I've had even tonight while listening to music, and then on my last cell phone, which was Virginmobile, when it ran out of minutes, it said I could talk to "Alex" if I wanted to add more minutes. That's what a customer service person told me, that I needed to speak to someone named "Alex". And this is a different phone from the others I've used, where I was having misdirections and connections when I dialed 411 and was having totally bizarre things going on with the phone. When I sat down at the booth at Sharx Bar, there was a quiz that came up on the screen, of a game to play, which I didn't play, but of asking which organization was in charge of federal communications and it reminded me of this.
I am not delusional about this stuff either...this woman asked me if I'd really seen a woman with a fedora and sunglasses smoking or if it was just my imagination, and I told her no, I literally saw her, and she was there in the flesh and then I randomly, right after talking to them, clicked to that one clip and thought it was so weird I even showed THEM right away and then they came over to me and wanted to talk more and introduced themselves. I can prove it, because I am able to recommend their health food site which online and his username is higgstix. They were great and I liked them and I wasn't the only one who thought was happened was strange--they did too! It was as purely coincidental but funny, like my asking for a song Di likes and getting Elton John. I was thinking Phil Collins for some reason but EJ came online right away.
But, for example, all day today I've had ads that are just messing with you type of ads, and I have to get rid of this "babylon" program so they don't come up at all. But there is a headline with it and depending on what I've been blogging about, if it's anything that isn't even about Di but sounds remotely I guess, like her, they start advertising colon cleansing. Which, I feel, is harassing in a way because until now, or on one other post...I've never looked this up and never post anything close to this. So, for example, today, I've gotten all these ads about colon cleansing and then energy and stuff and the energy thing I get but not the other. Colon cleansing is not that common and routine for normal public and the fact this keeps coming up on ads is strange. Then, if you look at my whole post here and back today, I have not once talked about chicken. But when I was looking some things up, and I haven't done any "surfing" today but I was looking up the meaning of the ark of the covenant because of what someone said to me the other day...and then I started getting all these ads about "don't buy a chicken coop" and then "chicken coop designs" and then after this, all this stuff about "clean" products.
It's not normal and especially not when the only time I've talked about chicken or coops is when I'm with my son and I was told he is relegated to sometimes playing with them and then where I'm staying now, until I can sue Community Action for housing discrimination and retaliation, there is chicken coop style wire on one of the windows, which I noticed. Which I've never written about or even talked about but then I get ads about this?
It's been like this all day. After I listened to the k-love program, "lifeline", I started getting ads about "Watch The World Cup Online".
Oh, well I just looked up the "babylon" program and it was created in Israel and that's who runs it.
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Babylon_(program).
I only wanted to know because it matters to me who is harassing me or utilizing technology, in any way, to play mind games. I guess I'm disappointed. I would have thought the last thing Israel would name one of their programs would be "babylon". Of all things. Not that I didn't already have monitoring and other surveillance which was more than a little obvious. But now I can be rest assured, I have had an Israeli program onto my laptop for several months.
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Oh thank God. A song that both my Dad and I like. I think my own Dad doesn't even know the half of it. Neither does my uncle. "How Far Is Heaven". It starts out "Save me from this prison..." and then the second verse starts out with "I've been locked up way too long"...
I remember the day my Dad played this song and we listened to it and what a new twist this now takes. "Lord, can you tell me? how far is heaven?"
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To my knowledge, it's been U.S., UK, and Israel and maybe a few others on the side but the main ones with monitoring have been the first 3. With all the time and money and resources that have gone into monitoring me, I just wonder. Oh, and maybe Canada, some good and some bad. I think, some good and some bad from all.
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I went to uninstall and it said it was last chance at $9.70 but I'm not paying for it. There is a little girl featured with a red apple in one hand and a green apple in the other hand, sort of a play on, I guess "apples and oranges" but even less of a difference. I had one ad about get rid of hijacker. Maybe because I used the name Jack. Oh probably bc of my writing about kidnapping and different forms. That was a good program. Yes, out out hijackers and weirdos.
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the vibe has been changing back and forth a little but it improved and then sort of went down and then improved again. I like this song, "As I Lay Down To Sleep"
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I turned off music and laid down to sleep and got an image. I don't know where it's from though because I didn't see this today and don't remember seeing this picture. It was of two very dark haired women, with very long and very dark hair and maybe curly? and sitting close to eachother against a wall or a tree. backs to the wall or tree. It's 12:30, PST, about. I think they're from another culture because they had long dresses or flowing garments on. They were sitting on the ground or floor and I think it was outdoors. Not sure, but that's what I think. I also saw motion because the angle was of, if I am facing the opposite direction of the women, so they are looking my way and I'm looking their way, except I was to their left. It is either Eastern India or Middle East, one of those countries. I would think also possibly Latin America but I don't know if they wear longer gowns anymore. There was no head covering though because what the woman on the far side, to the most right side, was doing, was she had her arm casually draped over the other woman's shoulders and was sort of playing with her hair but like a mother would. Like they were either mother-daughter, sisters, or close relatives. So the hand was this other rightside woman's right hand and it was on the head of the second woman but both had dark hair.
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