Good morning me.
And mini-me.
Last night I slept and sort of cared for a little one. Which I did a great job of.
I had a nightmare involving police after I put the baby back in the crib for a short bit.
Then I got some tea to go and wore a brown tank and my jeans and saw this Bob the Builder shirt which made me think of my Dad (my Dad does a lot of work on their property with machines) and my son, so I put it over. It's like a mini half top with the tank below.
I have no idea why this came to mind, but but then I was walking and wondering if it looked okay--it's casual, but okay? and then thought it was fine. Then the song "I'm too sexy" by Right Said Fred came to mind and I put on the song random and it ended up being one featuring unicorns.
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I also figured out that some people can actually see what I am viewing, through their own remote viewing and I am trying to not give anyone the satisfaction of seeing a lot of cleavage. I know it has to be a man who must be the talented one because all of a sudden, women and their boobs were everywhere.
And not only that, it wasn't just that boobs were everywhere, but then for example, I saw a small part of something and then this truck goes by me, very very slowly, with the word printed on the side. I knew that someone had remote viewed or got what I got so I decided, aha! that's why I saw about 20 DDs in a row later in the day. This morning I could have seen a different part and just didn't even look bc some man would get the satisfaction.
I'm not making it up. Okay I may as well say...it was the aerola and then what do you know? a truck...now HOW MANY TRUCKS HAVE THIS TITLE ON THE SIDE? that said "Aerola" trucking went by.
I said to myself, "Hmmpf! Well you're NOT getting c--- today!" So I didn't even want to see what I could have seen if I'd wanted to.
I hope I start running into a lot of really ugly women. That would be hilarious. Actually, maybe seeing the other stuff, all the time, would be really distracting. I should just take this person through the Bible, scripture by painstaking scripture and talk to the person and tell God I want them to read everything I'm thinking. Just kidding.
At any rate, I know no one can know what I'm thinking all the time bc a lot of times someone is guessing something but getting it wrong. But I'm on guard and have been learning how to guard my thoughts better and mix it up. There are some tricks I"m employing.
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The Right-Said-Fred video I got, with the unicorns, is @
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hsanQmgylqU.
I might take off the top shirt later today just because it's sort of novelty, but I think it's fun.
I was given the brown shirt to wear so I should just wear that.
If I found a good red one I'd wear red for a change maybe. Has to be the right red though. I just wear whatever colors look good on me, I don't go by any kind of theme.
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My nightmare was very bad.
I was peed on in it.
First it was like I was in Waterville (where the Judge is) and I couldn't get out or leave but I am not sure absolutely. Then I was trying to avoid Wenatchee police, and one was coming at me and I tried to leave. I tried to call 911 for help and as I did this, this old man who was really disgusting, in full view of the police, decided he was going to pee on me. First it was cop harassment and then it was that they were allowing someone to do this to me. The man was older and had a lot of age spots and then the police were refusing to let me leave and blocking and trapping me in so this man could pee on me to insult me.
His you-know-what had age spots on it and he aimed at me and I tried to move and then it was a lot and there was blood in it. It was like rusty pee. I tried to get out of the way and was worried about AIDS or something because it was so foul. And then I wiped my face and looked in the mirror and my face was fine but had little small spots from irritation.
I really don't think it was a random dream but either was symbolic for something very serious or, I actually think it may have happened to someone literally.
I feel that it was a view into gang violence of some kind. Possibly, someone captive who is tortured, or maybe just the idea that this is what police and justice system and corporation gang people are doing to me symbolically. I tend to think it really happened to someone though.
I slept on a girl's bed and then had the baby sleep next to me and after I put it back in the crib, that's when I started to have the dream. It was a dream after I'd woken up and fell back asleep.
I probably have PTSD from what the City of Wenatchee and police have done to me, but I really think it is something that happened in reality too. It was too much of a blend of something that really happened and then symbolism.
It was a gang thing. it wasn't sexual in nature at all...it had nothing to do with that fringe practice of people doing this for sex stuff, it was degradation and like hazing or assault.
I would very strongly caution anyone who is like this or doing this kind of thing, to quit. I would advise against any of this violence and intimidation, in whatever form that it comes or may be practiced, I would advise not being a part of it.
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I also had some kind of impression of someone doing something to another person while standing up. A man and I didn't know if it was a white man with another man or something else. I don't know what.
The other thing I got right before I was falling asleep was something that I couldn't figure out which may have been something someone was seeing from a lab. I wasn't sure.
I thought, it's either food, or flower,, or something from an aquarium or a lab or a fetal thing. It was the strangest thing.
It was like an almost translucent white thing, and I only saw part of it. I saw something very delicate curling up a little bit,
The first impression was that it was soft and not hard like a metal or rock. More pliable and delicate. I almost wanted to say possibly gelatinous. But not gelatinous.
It moved slowly and was delicate so it made me think of like one of those underwater ameoba flower things that curls up when you touch it, with the delicate parts, or like a tiny little fetus, or a moving water lily (but it wasn't thin like water lily petals would be). It wasn't paper thin like that, and it was moving, and it was sort of like a living thing in a way. I suppose it could have been something else. I just don't know what. I saw a part of it only. I only could see like a section where it was a section to my right. If I am looking straight out and forward, it was a section to my right. I saw it in the right corner of my mind's eye.
It was very mysterious but I did get a sense of some things it was and some things it wasn't. I know there was nothing in the house, at that time, that was anything about this, because everyone was lying down or asleep and nothing was going on and the t.v. wasn't on.
Oh, sea anenome, that's what it sort of moved like but also like a tiny little fetus hand (or more than one) or something, but so small it would be before viability. I don't know how to describe it better than that.
It wasn't a steam or vapor,
it wasn't a metal or really hard fixure,
I didn't see any background with it
It wasn't hard soft solid like a rubber ball
It wasn't liquid like without borders or any definition
I remember at the very first I wondered if it was some kind of a robot part because of the small clawing or curling movement, but then I saw that it was translucent white and a different kind of substance. This kid is sitting here with a rubber ball that is sort of clear white or translucent but that wasn't the kind of substance. It wasn't soft like a hard rubber ball,(which could be kind of soft) it was even softer and it was more delicate.
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11:25 a.m. Pretty good feel for the day. Yesterday was up and down and a lot of contrast.
Today has been interesting. I think something interesting just happened but I can't write about it I don't think, not right now, and yet something just coordinated somehow. A lot of shock and surprise so something must have happened!
Then I was walking back from this one store where everyone seemed to be so shocked, and the song by Mariah Carey came to my mind, but I have to look it up.
"I know, I've never told you...all that, I wanted to say...Oh, it's called "One Sweet Day" ft. Boys II Men. It was very strange though bc then I had a major psychic attack and had to pray about it and then it was gone. Things were fine earlier, and now a little more fight but that's okay. I feel like someone is crying, when I listened to this song, "One Sweet Day", that's it's an important song to someone who has a family member that has passed away. I am not sure about everything yet...I guess I would have to know more in reality, what is going on.
I guess, this will sound very dumb, but this song makes me think of Diana. P. Diana but then I think it is special to a lot of people and I have always liked it too. It also makes me think of people who have lost their mother or father and then I just read it was written for someone who was murdered. I am trying to remember when I last heard this song? and what it was about for me then. I guess an old friend comes to mind and family too. Or even makes me think about God. Good song for separation too.
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I will admit to one other thing right now. This morning or last night, right before I went to sleep or when I woke this morning, this boy came to mind, a Ukraine boy, in the outfit he was wearing on Sunday and then today there was a man who looked Irish that was wearing the exact same thing. A turquoise, white, and black shirt and black wrangler jeans. It looked like almost an exact replica of what the boy had been wearing. I didn't think about him on Monday but I did think about him, to the point of thinking about the brand of his jeans (bc they were wrangler and someone had given me wrangler so just thinking, but no big deal) and that they were black, today or late last night. Really handsome and exotic looking boy.
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I was looking up ideas for songs and the word "karmin" and "karmini" came to mind. I looked it up and couldn't find anything. Then I found something in Bosnian or Serbian ?! that means "lipstick" or "lipsticks".
I found something sort of close--ahmad jawad karimi, and it's afghan and pretty good. It's called, I think, "Nigoh"
back to mariah carey again. "we belong together"
At any rate, I was thinking about how to share this part about how I mixed rum with water and then found out it's the way the did it in England. I had no idea and I mixed it exactly the same ratio without even knowing what the ratio was then. I looked it up later wondering what in the world and why in the world I had done this. It's called "grog". I had had no idea.
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I went to this store today and instead of wanting everything in2s I wanted 1. thank goodness. It was like breaking a curse for a minute. So I'm back to ONE, numero uno, mi y mi hijo solamente. at least for today.
One other weird thing yesterday was that this one woman, won't say who, set out yellow pants with cherry blossoms on them yesterday. I didn't pay attention until today I thought about it because I had mixed a yellow and cherry cake mix together and then yesterday I accidentally spelled "bloger" instead of "blogger" with 2 gs and I came back to the laptop and there was an asian family in yellow on one side and a royal crest in red on the other side. haha. I thought someone was playing a joke and then I realized oh, i had spelled it wrong. but it was a weird accident bc then i got back and there was oolong tea (which i like) from london and this uk-chinese mix of things i guess,, for the theme yesterday. it was just random but there are definitely psychic people out there.
i thought it was so weird about the grog though. I had even held up the bottle as if to measure and then added water at a certain level, which is just bizarre. esp. for having no idea about grog and what it is. it's something the u.s. does to be hospitable to uk but it's an old navy thing. maybe it goes back 100 years or more.
i heard some christian music today which was nice. "i exalt thee" and I do like that song. I might make it a worship song day.
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A little more by Jennifer Knapp came to mind. One of my favorite christian artists.
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There must be some kind of a bet over numbers or something bc there was this shock first and then a weird backlash from somewhere, after I started choosing things in 1 and then it was like a few people started going by in 2s with twins and "twinning" truck and then also this woman snubbed me with her back to me and I have no idea why and even the babylon thing started sending me harassing links...like, "lose the belly fat idiot" or "fat loss secrets for idiots" and things like this. the good thing was that on the other end, i saw a lot of hawaaian leis, and vw beetles and christian music. i figure if there is worship music, it can't be that bad what is going on...i don't think? i don't know. i can't tell without seeing my son. when i can see my son, then i know how things are going.
maybe it's my bob the builder's shirt someone doesn't like. I looked at it again and it is JUST fine. it looks stylish in a theme park way.
this idiotic man just walked by though, saying "i just saw a store, crazy, crazy, crazy this and that" and on and on.
yesterday I had "Onward Christian Soldiers" to mind so playing it now and I got the Mormon Tabernacle Choir and a guy on a horse with a big sword in the air. At church the other day, the message was about staying in God's garden, so to speak, or in the will of god to avoid serpent as symbol of sin. Then there was a message about 10 talents, and then about King David and how he single handedly slew (slew? is a word?) over 800 or more enemies and it was about feeling small but standing your ground and getting a victory in the end despite the odds. Also, I guess his hand was so tired and worked so hard it was fixed to the handle and people had to literally pull it off. In all of my Bible studies, I had never remembered this part or heard of it so it was new to me. I was late but got the references for notes.
I clicked on this link for the onward christian soldiers and then later noticed, it says dutch templars and then there is a large st. george's cross? on the horse and then...this is sort of strange. at the end, it was made in oct. 11, 2207 so it's not new, but it says, "christian soldiers? british troops watch a white cross in the sky and a black cat charm below." ? I don't know what the emphasis of the video is.
better than a hallelujah, by amy grant
(but i love the hallelujahs too)
this song came to mind bc of spending time with the baby last night and the fact that i know i'm an excellent mother and i know God knows this too.
yesterday i saw a few bulldogs and now when i have Red Bull or anything, instead of thinking about past stuff and associations, I have a nice thing to think about--my son. I read awhile ago that he's a taurus, a may baby (i knew may but not so into all the zodiac stuff that i know all the signs for all the months and timeframes...) and realized he's represented by the bull. so i think this is kind of cool. everytime i get a red bull now, or see a bulldog, i don't think about negative things but of my son. I also can't remember who, but he shares a birth month with some people i've known in the past, I am just not positive about who.
A peace song came to mind so played
Peace in the Valley by Elvis Presly
Oh, and last night I bought something for this woman and she usually strikes me a certain way but then it was interesting bc when she gave me a hug it was good energy. She started cryiing and everything, as if what I offered her was exactly what she needed or wanted.
I like the Song of Reconcilliation by Becker. I sang it for a wedding a long time ago.
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