I think it's maybe time for Wenatchee churches to support another housing ministry. Start up a new one altogether.
I am unlikely to get any kind of help from attorneys in this area, and the police said housing places can do whatever they want, like what Teria did today, giving me 1hour notice to say I was kicked out. Let me tell you about Teria and what happened at the "Haven of Hope".
Right from the very first day, Teria was extremely hostile to me. I didn't know why. Right from the bat, she didn't want me there and it was clear she knew about me from someone else.
Guess who. My old housemate who cheated with my fiance, for one. And then she lied about it. The same woman who gave the morning devotional today, about "lying".
I wondered what her problem with me was, from the very start. Others said NO ONE else ever got the initial treatment that I got. She tried to tell me I was "paranoid schitzophrenic" within 20 minutes after meeting me, but really, only after I said I didn't think I would sign the privacy disclosure statement for all my personal information to be entered into a state database. Haven of Hope gets some government monies and she said to sign this. But it was voluntary and I said I would rather not. So, she started harassing me, saying I was "paranoid" and if I didn't want to sign it, it was a real sign of mental illness.
BS.
The next thing she tried to get me to sign, which was voluntary or supposed to be, was a big privacy release form that was for the Haven of Hope Board of Directors. She told me, if I didn't sign it, that I would be kicked out. That was coming from the top, she said, from Ron Robberson.
The release for the Board of Directors form, said right on it, "Consent may be revoked at any time". I asked, "If consent can be revoked at any time, it indicates this release is voluntary and not mandatory or grounds for refusing housing."
What it comes down to, is that they didn't want to refuse me straight out, because it would be discrimination. So instead, they decided to let me stay there for one week or less, and then try to write up a bunch of excuses to get rid of me. I will tell you what the excuses were.
But first, back to Teria and how she knew my old housemate who tried to say I was "psycho" and held knives after I exposed what she was doing with my fiance, whom SHE thought was my husband. We signed up with her as husband and wife, with Mykal.
So, when I was living with Mykal, she said she wanted me to meet her friend "Teria". I remembered because I kept asking what her name was, and when she spelled it for me, I said it was really pretty and I'd never heard it before. Now, how many people in Wenatchee are names "Teria" and do gardening, like Mykal said she did with Teria? Not only that, Mykal told me, after Exxon left, that I could do "chores" for her, to earn my keep. Yeah, the woman who cheats with my ex wants me to do cleaning for her. Forget it. But she was telling me, I could put together some "welcome gift baskets" for Haven of Hope.
Huh. I didn't put 2 & 2 together until I was being handed the frickin' "gift basket" at Haven of Hope myself.
So I don't know what it is with the whole Methodist or Free Methodist deal, but Mykal went to the same church as Teria too.
So then, I'm sitting there, under their thumb and really getting treated like total DIRT, and I kept my mouth shut. I defended myself calmly when needed, but once, I let Teria insult me for a full 20 minutes and said nothing. That's when I imagined myself, with a crown of thorns being ground into my head. She just went on and on and on, insulting me over nothing. Real christian.
So next, I really had to withhold from blogging about THIS one, but it was maybe one day after they said I could be there, there was a Bible study. That was quite the experience. I had just been asked how much I paid for my purse, my yellow handbag, or how much it cost and I said, "$300" and I added I got it on sale, but I don't know who heard that.
So, then the woman giving the Bible lesson, who comes in from the Free Methodist church, sits down and the first thing she says, is how HER son would NEVER date or be interested in any woman with a $300 bag. She went on and on, saying "Who would pay $300 for a handbag???" She spent at least 5 minutes on this, over and over, $300bag and how HER son wouldn't EVER be interested in any woman who would pay that for a bag.
Finally, I couldn't resist. I leaned over to the woman next to me and whispered into her ear: "I would. I might even switch teams over it." This other woman just sort of smirked.
After that, I couldn't help myself. I became the Devil's Advocate. The whole sermon was all about how material things mean nothing. A lot of it, I agree with, but some of it was extreme. I finally spoke up and said out loud, "Well, I don't think our President would get very much respect if he was driving a beat up Mazda truck." She said, "Oh sure he WOULD!" Yeah right. When Obama starts driving an old Toyota Camry, that will be the day. Let's have Obama in the beater and the security all around in their mercury cars.
So then, it got even better. She said the whole body of Christ was important. I know, I know. I agree too. However, then she's saying the little pinky is no less important than the leg. I just started thinking "I would sure rather have my heart than my pinky. Or my leg. I mean, take my pinky people." I DO understand the concept. I do. I just couldn't help but be less than enthusiastic after the long tirade about a $300 bag. I spoke up for the rich for once. I said, "I don't think it really matters what you have, it's what you do with what you have." Not only that, some bags are WORTH a lot more than others that fall apart after a month.
You know what? I was thinking, why doesn't Obama just drive a beater Toyota camry with maybe something even better? A flat tire. Then we can really demonstrate our muscle. I just, once, want to see Obama driving around on a rim.
I guess I don't like extremes of any kind. Or illogic or false pretenses. Let's just be real about the way things are.
So as for me and my behavior, there was nothing wrong with me. Oh but believe me, some people WANTED there to be. Whatever. I think I was the only one who wasn't on a medication and yet Teria is yelling at me, that if I want to stay there, or go back, I had better be on medication for mental illness. I walked out calmly (oh, there's more) and I heard her scream, SCREAM: She's SICK! I walked back into the main room and said, "What did you say?" in an even voice, very calmly, and in front of about 5 other women, she screams "YOU'RE SICK!!!!!!" The woman was unhinged. If she thought I was so sick, poor mentally ill woman, why was she screaming this to everyone?
Her grounds for my being mentally ill? Let me give you her official list:
1. I didn't want to sign the privacy release that was voluntary,
So therefore, I am: Paranoid Schitzophrenic.
2. I asked questions about their funding and Board of Directors,
So therefore, I am: Paranoid and Authority Defiant.
3. A very mentally ill woman claimed I was "pacing at night",
So therefore, I am: a Sleepwalker (?) or Just Generally Mentally Ill.
Let me detail this last one--Teria brought this up today, claiming since I paced, I was mentally ill. I said we had already gone over this. One woman claimed I was "pacing" in the middle of the night, and then looking at myself in the mirror. Lol. I told the staff I had gotten up twice in the night to use the bathroom (I don't know...something like 10 paces there and 10 paces back) and then I may have seen myself in the mirror when I was washing my hands.
The same woman who said I was pacing was also telling staff that I took photos of a teenage girl in her bra and underwear. I said it wasn't true and the other woman insisted. As it came out, it WAS NOT true, and then the staff just wanted to say "It was your word against hers". No, it wasn't. There was evidence, because the teenager herself said I didn't do that, and her mother checked her cell phone and there was nothing there.
The things I did wrong (which I admit):
1. I forgot to sign back in after getting in late at night, but around 9 p.m. They tried to say it was later but it wasn't and they have cameras so check the footage.
2. I forgot to do the "chore" one day and asked to make it up.
Everyone else makes mistakes, and no one is penalized. But I was. I was run through, over stuff like this and every single day, I was called into the office for the following reasons:
1. I set a book on someone else's bunk that was right across from me, for a few minutes while I was packing a bag. It was very wrong, and against the rules, to put one's belongings in someone else's "area".
2. I supposedly didn't sign back in when I got back and I was out late, more than 3 times in a week. Truth: I was only out past 9 on 3 nights in last week's period which included the weekend. I always signed out and in except for last night, I forgot to sign back in.
Otherwise, I followed all the rules. I did the chore every single day. I asked if I could do it later one day and then forgot but it was one time.
There was supposed to be an initial 3 day grace period and I was hammered over little things, when I was new, things no one else was hammered over, by Teria.
I said to one woman, after being chewed out about something stupid: "I'd almost rather live with a bad boyfriend."
I wanted to live with the women, and just get on my feet financially, but no, that wasn't okay. Teria gave this big sermon this morning about lying, but she lied. One woman (I will never name) said, "She lies. And she says she's a christian."
Everyone makes mistakes. Everyone lies. So what. The big deal, is that I was being harassed one side up and down the other and they first tried to block me from even having housing and then tried to say I broke all the rules or that I was mentally ill when I did nothing wrong and was normal and didn't even talk that much to the others.
One person who is not yet on medication or in counseling (and should be), is Teria.
There were other things going on, but really, it was the responsiblity of the staff to be objective and fair and they made it clear from the start that they didn't want me there.
I did my chores everyday except for forgetting one day when I first asked if I could do it later and then I asked to make it up. I also made a couple small mistakes, like, I set my book on a bunk next to mine for a minute. I also forgot, one time, to sign back in. Other than that, I did the chores, got them done on time, was at the house on time, signed in and out, had my room or space clean and bed made by 9:30 a.m., and I didn't harass anyone or cause any disturbances with others. I pretty much minded my own business and tried to be equally nice and polite with everyone. I certaintly wasn't pacing back and forth one night, nor was I staring at myself in a mirror. I said to the staff, "Who said I was staring in a mirror? at night?! It would be dark and the lights were out." So then I thought, oh, when I washed my hands at the sink maybe I saw my own reflection. So they didn't forget this, and this was cause for meds, and Teria didn't want to remember the woman who said this was the same one who said I took photos of a teenage girl in her bra and underwear.
It wasn't normal, my experience there, that's for sure. But there are some people in this town whose main goal is to push me out of everything and do everything in their power to try to get me "to be" "mentally ill". If I'm taking medications, it MUST mean it's true.
Thereafter, anyone can do whatever they want and say "Oh, she's _________ and on meds." I was normal and followed the rules, and I don't need any medication. What I need, is a decent job, and I wish I had married a lawyer or a Judge sometimes. I don't know, undercover superhero would be fine too.
One woman said to me, "It's like boot camp, huh." I said, "No. It's like grade school outdoor camp."
I did it though. I did what I had to do, and what I thought was expected of me. I didn't do anything wrong, I didn't complain, and that was it. It was humbling, but I did it. I wanted to be in a clean environment where I was just able to get footing financially, but no, drama ensues. And no, I didn't do anything weird nor did I even yell or insult others, though I took my own share of it.
Thursday, September 10, 2009
My Arsenic Test Results
They keep making excuses for giving me the results. I have to go in person, I'm told, back to Bainbridge Island.
She hinted they were normal range. If that is true, then what else would cause blanched out skin? On both me and my son? What would cause this on my son at the same time it happened to me, miles away? And then he got it again, the same thing, but new marks, within the last week.
If it's not a heavy metal poisoning of some kind, the only thing that even could cause something like would be...?
Scientists? Military. Let's start with military. I'd like to hear from the military please.
She hinted they were normal range. If that is true, then what else would cause blanched out skin? On both me and my son? What would cause this on my son at the same time it happened to me, miles away? And then he got it again, the same thing, but new marks, within the last week.
If it's not a heavy metal poisoning of some kind, the only thing that even could cause something like would be...?
Scientists? Military. Let's start with military. I'd like to hear from the military please.
The Truth About My Innocent Son's Injuries
Today I saw my son and there was a blanched out spot on his left cheek. That would be HIS left. It's the same thing that is on my arms and which I found on his right hand (his right) and on his left cheek.
My son had circles under his eyes, which the monitor noticed, was sick with a cold, and had a severe blanched out white and calloused mark on his index finger of his right hand. It looked like it was from a burn. It is white in color and raised.
He said he hadn't been sleeping. I asked if he hurt more during the day or at night and he said at night.
He had fingerprint bruises on his right shin and a couple on his back, lower back.
I want to know who really cares about my son, an innocent 3 year old, who has done nothing to harm anyone.
My son had circles under his eyes, which the monitor noticed, was sick with a cold, and had a severe blanched out white and calloused mark on his index finger of his right hand. It looked like it was from a burn. It is white in color and raised.
He said he hadn't been sleeping. I asked if he hurt more during the day or at night and he said at night.
He had fingerprint bruises on his right shin and a couple on his back, lower back.
I want to know who really cares about my son, an innocent 3 year old, who has done nothing to harm anyone.
Meeting With Someone Who Said I'd Never Make It Back
I guess what concerns me, with someone who tells me I'll never make it back, is why they are not then telling me "why".
What kind of friend tells you you'll never make it back but doesn't try to protect you or tell you what's going on?
There are a lot of wolves in sheep's clothing. And often, they'll use something to conceal what their true affiliation is.
Give me straight up. Either you're a coward, or you're going to be real about who you are and where you're from.
I saw his eyes shift to the left when I asked him about gangs and why some people weren't upfront about it. He said he wouldn't know why and looked to the left, nervously.
Then he kept going back to my son, and kept trying to remind me about my son and how did he look today and did I want him back or not.
His last words were "good luck" and "take care". Sounds familiar. Just a same old same old and he was one who kept serving up pork too. Kept saying I was "special". I said I wasn't anymore special than anyone else.
I don't know. Maybe I'm wrong. Maybe he was trying to help? I'm not saying who.
All I know, is that everyone thinks I know something really big and I don't know anything, except that a whole lot of people think something really big is going on and I know ALL ABOUT IT. If I knew all about it...
If I knew all about it, or anything at all, I would probably know exactly where to go and where I and my son were safe.
That's what I would do if I "knew so much".
I am really frickin' sick of thinking I know "SOMETHING". What the h--- is SOMETHING?
Why doesn't someone just tell me?
All I know, is I see people representing themselves with colors and I have no idea what it's for. I never signed up with any group on anything. I just wanted a normal life for me and my son.
We've got this red + green which is I guess, pro and against me.
Then we've got this black, red, white thing going and I have no idea what that's supposed to be for.
Then there's straight up blue.
Then there's yellow.
Then there's red or maybe red is with red, white, and black. I have no idea.
Does anyone want to EXPLAIN this to me???
What kind of friend tells you you'll never make it back but doesn't try to protect you or tell you what's going on?
There are a lot of wolves in sheep's clothing. And often, they'll use something to conceal what their true affiliation is.
Give me straight up. Either you're a coward, or you're going to be real about who you are and where you're from.
I saw his eyes shift to the left when I asked him about gangs and why some people weren't upfront about it. He said he wouldn't know why and looked to the left, nervously.
Then he kept going back to my son, and kept trying to remind me about my son and how did he look today and did I want him back or not.
His last words were "good luck" and "take care". Sounds familiar. Just a same old same old and he was one who kept serving up pork too. Kept saying I was "special". I said I wasn't anymore special than anyone else.
I don't know. Maybe I'm wrong. Maybe he was trying to help? I'm not saying who.
All I know, is that everyone thinks I know something really big and I don't know anything, except that a whole lot of people think something really big is going on and I know ALL ABOUT IT. If I knew all about it...
If I knew all about it, or anything at all, I would probably know exactly where to go and where I and my son were safe.
That's what I would do if I "knew so much".
I am really frickin' sick of thinking I know "SOMETHING". What the h--- is SOMETHING?
Why doesn't someone just tell me?
All I know, is I see people representing themselves with colors and I have no idea what it's for. I never signed up with any group on anything. I just wanted a normal life for me and my son.
We've got this red + green which is I guess, pro and against me.
Then we've got this black, red, white thing going and I have no idea what that's supposed to be for.
Then there's straight up blue.
Then there's yellow.
Then there's red or maybe red is with red, white, and black. I have no idea.
Does anyone want to EXPLAIN this to me???
Sermon On Telling Lies
Sometimes, the biggest sermons come from individuals who are guilty of the very thing they decide to preach to others.
I heard a very good teaching recently, about lying, and the problems it causes, and I would like to take this seriously and for one day, not mix fiction with fact. Not that mixing fiction with fact or saying so is "lying". But I have a very true story to tell, about a housing situation involving Haven of Hope, and yet I'm going to run it by a few lawyers and maybe the Board of Directors first, before I go public with my truth telling.
I heard a very good teaching recently, about lying, and the problems it causes, and I would like to take this seriously and for one day, not mix fiction with fact. Not that mixing fiction with fact or saying so is "lying". But I have a very true story to tell, about a housing situation involving Haven of Hope, and yet I'm going to run it by a few lawyers and maybe the Board of Directors first, before I go public with my truth telling.
Wednesday, September 9, 2009
Royal Family Aghast
I got some bad news tonight.
This woman who was a landscaper in Europe, for the English royal family, well, this woman paid me a visit. She bought me some cigarettes ...
Oh, I was going to do a spoof but I don't know if I should. I was cracking up the other night, thinking of a funny scenario, but when I think about writing it out, it doesn't sound as funny. It was really funny last night though. The woman of the house came in and asked what was so funny and I was in the kitchen cracking up. I was making dinner and just laughing, and then I was cleaning and I thought about it and started laughing again.
But when I think about it, it's not in very good taste. I mean, it's so awful it's actually funny. It involves people that literally died, so that's not funny at all. Even if I don't know them. But I had this scene, imagined scene in my mind...that had me undone.
Let me think...Maybe I can write about it...Let me think. I don't know, okay, well this is the thing. Sometimes comedy can be be made of really bad things. I mean, that's how we survive...laughter. I think, sometimes the darkest things, can be turned around and finally you just think about it and have to laugh.
Okay, well, here's my story folks. It's really not a joke.
You see, the English family knows all about me folks. Oh yeeeaaah. If you want some hard evidence, go to the royal website. Look at who is smiling from the balcony.
Yep. The queen and king Edward and do you see what colors they're wearing? Red and green. That's right. And, I found out, they coordinated their outfits just for me. And not just any red and green. I mean, this was like that bright flash of red and green I saw the other night and then I go to the royal website and who is laughing her you-know-what off from the balcony? Queen Elizabeth. She wore all green and Edward wore all red. I was supposed to be there, and got an invitation but it was sort of in your face. William was instructed to ditch me, I heard, and hang onto Kate for dear life, and I was supposed to be at the bottom of the balcony in a reverse Romeo and Juliet scene.
Just kidding. I never got the invite. But I heard, from one of the security guards, that they joked about it. Can you imagine? I found out no one liked me so much after I put up my scandalous french trashy tank photos. AND, someone TOLD Liz what kind of rubber ducky I would have in MY bath.
All of England knows she had a rubber ducky with an inflatable crown. Well, I'm not going to tell you what was inflating on MY rubber ducky...
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The rubber ducky. My crown on my ducky stayed put. It was the DUCK that did the inflating and deflating. I guess you could call it a rubber crown with an inflatable duck.
This was seen as sort of usurping Liz's authority. You know, I was just kidding around, but that kind of thing gets back. Believe me.
So anyway, there was other kinds of drama. Will liked me but Harry saw me first. And what Harry sees, Harry wants. Well, what Harry wants, Harry gets. Who do YOU think wins in a arm wrestling contest? Will wins with karate kicks.
So anyway, there was all this fighting over me, which was kept a big secret and then the Queen found out and flipped.
She didn't find out until it was a little late though. She found out when I was writing about red & fish on the baby bridge. She called them inside her office, and made them sit down.
Her eyes were WIDE open and she was so flustered, she tried taking her glasses down and then she remembered they were on that string. So she took them off her head altogether and said, "BOYS."
(yeah, she still calls them boys)
So they knew right then and there. She continued, calmly, but with a nervous laugh which was quickly covered with a swig of gin. She cleared her throat (so I heard) and said again, pointing to my blog, what is THIS???
"WHO is this" came next.
Harry was as pink as his shirt. Harry always wears pink before he goes into her office for a formal talk and Will always wears blue, so she can tell them apart. Without her glasses, you know. It's not that Harry was supposed to be a girl or anything. Pink suits his complexion better, and like I said, it's just about telling them apart. Okay, I digress. So, anyway, being like a fish out of water, Will was a little blue. A little blue in the face. He was holding his breath actually and Granny told them to breathe and start talking.
They're both usually very articulate but they didn't know what to say. "Uhh. Who?" They tried to play dumb but Granny is very smart. She may not see as well as she used to, but believe me, she's...like, whipper-snapper smart.
Elizabeth wanted the scoop, but you know, she's a practical woman too and very direct. She cut right to the chase. "Will, did you impregnate some AMERICAN woman?"
Harry almost fell out of his chair, and started coughing. What is this about Billy-the-fish and who is RED? this frumpet?!
Harry got defensive and stood up. "She's not a frumpet! She's fun. You'd like her Granny." Granny responded with one raised eyebrow.
(by the way, frumpet is a cross between a crumpet and a frump. It's just an English saying.)
Granny continued, "Harry, tell me something. How would you know if she's 'fun'?" Harry mumbled he'd just overheard some things.
Granny was stuck on the fish and red on the baby bridge. She went back to it. "THIS is what I'm interested in," she said. "Some American woman thinks people are trying to kill her and send messages to her because of some "tryst" with William."
"Oh Granny," Harry said. Harry was doing all the talking and Will didn't know what to say. Granny had another thought. "Who is Mr. Wooley?" Granny started asking a lot of questions and then she said she believed them. But when they left her office, Granny started doing some research.
The heat was on.
Granny was digging through all the records, to find out when and where Will and Harry were and what they were up to.
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Anyway, I had a funnier scenario in my mind when I was cracking up while making dinner. I cracked up laughing thinking about what their expressions would be if they read my blog and believed it at all, and what kind of American nut was dramatizing every event in her life, believing it was about Harry and Will. So I started thinking about a spoof but it's not very funny. In fact, I don't know that it's very good to make mention of something so serious in a funny way. It's really not funny but I'm stressed out!
So I was telling this other guy I might write a whole book on a Da Vinci version of my flame and history and how the whole kingdom got this idea that some nutcase American woman had secured a place in one of the royal's hearts. Oh, and some was on the idea that "X" is really for "Chris" not "10", because X is used to replace Christ for Christmas: Xmas. Chris is the secret weapon--He is a twin of Harry's and was whisked away to the States to grow up undetected. That's the big national security matter.
And then I was going to have them all giving up the throne to farm. But Will wants to act, so he goes to California and gets a new nickname, as he comes in with hayseed in his pockets. They give him the nickname: The Beverly Hill-Billy. I don't know what Harry does. I think he paints. I said they all quit the throne and open an art gallery. Will is curator, Kate too, and Charles and Harry paint, but I then decided that wasn't becoming, to advertise one's own art after being royal. Sort of selling oneself. They have an art museum and they work the land and act and dance. Charles dances like--you have no idea. He's not so stiff when he thinks no one is looking. He's very limber too. He puts on a very good comic act when he wants to as well. He knows how to jig. And Margaret, Princess Margaret loves violets. She insisted on having a canopy bed when she was a little girl, even though she already knew she was a Princess.
Prince Charles had a very brief interest in me TOO, but that was toOtally under wraps and he realized it was just some innocent fascination with my some personality traits I had in common with Diana. He loves Camilla, but then Camilla found out and asked him what was going on.
Harry's ex, well, she was so brokenhearted, Chelsey, that she made a public point with his interest in me. She had her eyes all black underneath from crying and stepped out wearing a HUGE Cameo piece of jewelry at her neck. Yeah, like I didn't miss THAT. I took ONE look and thought, "OH NO SHE KNOWS!" yeah, and imagine. For a frumpet like me.
Cheers. I thought she did really well, considering. I mean, I was thoroughly impressed.
1. Get photographed looking really sad and then,
2. Switch it up. Get photographed looking like you're having a grand time, drink in hand, and make him jealous and want her back.
I love you deeply and you hurt me and then "I'm having SO more more fun without you." I learned some really good things from Chelsea.
In the end scene, we're all pulling horses through the meadow and trying to get along.
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uh oh, getting the sad vibe. How do I make this funny again?
Everyone needs to laugh more. I told Alvaro once, "Who do you think I'd be better with? Prince Harry or Prince William?" Alvaro stared at me and said, firmly, shocked and then standing straight and staring me down, he said, "Prince ALVARO."
I still remember exactly where he was standing, and what he looked like when he said this. It was AL FINITE!
Anyway, I knew I was a Princess after I tried to sleep on a crappy sofa bed. My back was fine and then I slept on that bed and had to go to the ER. I knew there had to be a pea in that couch or something. It was like, "What tha...???" I was FINE on a normal mattress. But I had to be rushed to ER on a subpar mattress and then I knew it. "I KNEW it!" i said to msyelf, "I AM a PRINCESS!" and then I understood.
Anyway, when the Royal Courts lost me, they lost the next Fergie-in-House. I guess they decided one rambunctious redhead was enough.
I wouldn't get caught sucking on toes though. Oh, but she and I would TEAR up the town, er, courtyards. I think they really missed out. They really missed out on me. I could have brought a whole new kind of energy to the crew. Ah, c'est la vie.
So it all went down, and in the end, the King and Queen celebrate their good fortune in red and green. I don't think everyone is happy about it though. There were a few votes that weren't heard.
My father told me, "I believe you will raise people from the dead." I think Fr. Joachim would laugh and say "Yeah, from their graves." I want to raise people up, sure. I want to raise Hell, well once did I guess, which is sort of the same thing as raising people from the dead maybe. Who knows, maybe someone will be able to get enough courage to start over and lead a new life, like one from the dead. Maybe someone will have a second chance at life.
I do have a soulmate. Sure. And he knows who he is and hasn't told me yet. So I'm with the sistahs until he gets up the nerve to figure out what he wants. Granny wanted one of her daughters to name their kids "Valiant" like from Prince Valiant. Wouldn't that be tacky?
Anyway, Harry and I were going to stage a little drama at that last royal function, but he had his military duties and everything.
So anyway, Bainbridge and Seattle. Humph. Yeah. THAT was being fun. Um...I don't want to be a Princess unless I get bodyguards. So anyway, everyone over there was smoking cigarettes with the label "kings".
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I don't need a king or a prince. I just want someone who loves me who I can trust and have fun with. Who cares about the rest. That's what everyone wants.
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This woman who was a landscaper in Europe, for the English royal family, well, this woman paid me a visit. She bought me some cigarettes ...
Oh, I was going to do a spoof but I don't know if I should. I was cracking up the other night, thinking of a funny scenario, but when I think about writing it out, it doesn't sound as funny. It was really funny last night though. The woman of the house came in and asked what was so funny and I was in the kitchen cracking up. I was making dinner and just laughing, and then I was cleaning and I thought about it and started laughing again.
But when I think about it, it's not in very good taste. I mean, it's so awful it's actually funny. It involves people that literally died, so that's not funny at all. Even if I don't know them. But I had this scene, imagined scene in my mind...that had me undone.
Let me think...Maybe I can write about it...Let me think. I don't know, okay, well this is the thing. Sometimes comedy can be be made of really bad things. I mean, that's how we survive...laughter. I think, sometimes the darkest things, can be turned around and finally you just think about it and have to laugh.
Okay, well, here's my story folks. It's really not a joke.
You see, the English family knows all about me folks. Oh yeeeaaah. If you want some hard evidence, go to the royal website. Look at who is smiling from the balcony.
Yep. The queen and king Edward and do you see what colors they're wearing? Red and green. That's right. And, I found out, they coordinated their outfits just for me. And not just any red and green. I mean, this was like that bright flash of red and green I saw the other night and then I go to the royal website and who is laughing her you-know-what off from the balcony? Queen Elizabeth. She wore all green and Edward wore all red. I was supposed to be there, and got an invitation but it was sort of in your face. William was instructed to ditch me, I heard, and hang onto Kate for dear life, and I was supposed to be at the bottom of the balcony in a reverse Romeo and Juliet scene.
Just kidding. I never got the invite. But I heard, from one of the security guards, that they joked about it. Can you imagine? I found out no one liked me so much after I put up my scandalous french trashy tank photos. AND, someone TOLD Liz what kind of rubber ducky I would have in MY bath.
All of England knows she had a rubber ducky with an inflatable crown. Well, I'm not going to tell you what was inflating on MY rubber ducky...
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The rubber ducky. My crown on my ducky stayed put. It was the DUCK that did the inflating and deflating. I guess you could call it a rubber crown with an inflatable duck.
This was seen as sort of usurping Liz's authority. You know, I was just kidding around, but that kind of thing gets back. Believe me.
So anyway, there was other kinds of drama. Will liked me but Harry saw me first. And what Harry sees, Harry wants. Well, what Harry wants, Harry gets. Who do YOU think wins in a arm wrestling contest? Will wins with karate kicks.
So anyway, there was all this fighting over me, which was kept a big secret and then the Queen found out and flipped.
She didn't find out until it was a little late though. She found out when I was writing about red & fish on the baby bridge. She called them inside her office, and made them sit down.
Her eyes were WIDE open and she was so flustered, she tried taking her glasses down and then she remembered they were on that string. So she took them off her head altogether and said, "BOYS."
(yeah, she still calls them boys)
So they knew right then and there. She continued, calmly, but with a nervous laugh which was quickly covered with a swig of gin. She cleared her throat (so I heard) and said again, pointing to my blog, what is THIS???
"WHO is this" came next.
Harry was as pink as his shirt. Harry always wears pink before he goes into her office for a formal talk and Will always wears blue, so she can tell them apart. Without her glasses, you know. It's not that Harry was supposed to be a girl or anything. Pink suits his complexion better, and like I said, it's just about telling them apart. Okay, I digress. So, anyway, being like a fish out of water, Will was a little blue. A little blue in the face. He was holding his breath actually and Granny told them to breathe and start talking.
They're both usually very articulate but they didn't know what to say. "Uhh. Who?" They tried to play dumb but Granny is very smart. She may not see as well as she used to, but believe me, she's...like, whipper-snapper smart.
Elizabeth wanted the scoop, but you know, she's a practical woman too and very direct. She cut right to the chase. "Will, did you impregnate some AMERICAN woman?"
Harry almost fell out of his chair, and started coughing. What is this about Billy-the-fish and who is RED? this frumpet?!
Harry got defensive and stood up. "She's not a frumpet! She's fun. You'd like her Granny." Granny responded with one raised eyebrow.
(by the way, frumpet is a cross between a crumpet and a frump. It's just an English saying.)
Granny continued, "Harry, tell me something. How would you know if she's 'fun'?" Harry mumbled he'd just overheard some things.
Granny was stuck on the fish and red on the baby bridge. She went back to it. "THIS is what I'm interested in," she said. "Some American woman thinks people are trying to kill her and send messages to her because of some "tryst" with William."
"Oh Granny," Harry said. Harry was doing all the talking and Will didn't know what to say. Granny had another thought. "Who is Mr. Wooley?" Granny started asking a lot of questions and then she said she believed them. But when they left her office, Granny started doing some research.
The heat was on.
Granny was digging through all the records, to find out when and where Will and Harry were and what they were up to.
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Anyway, I had a funnier scenario in my mind when I was cracking up while making dinner. I cracked up laughing thinking about what their expressions would be if they read my blog and believed it at all, and what kind of American nut was dramatizing every event in her life, believing it was about Harry and Will. So I started thinking about a spoof but it's not very funny. In fact, I don't know that it's very good to make mention of something so serious in a funny way. It's really not funny but I'm stressed out!
So I was telling this other guy I might write a whole book on a Da Vinci version of my flame and history and how the whole kingdom got this idea that some nutcase American woman had secured a place in one of the royal's hearts. Oh, and some was on the idea that "X" is really for "Chris" not "10", because X is used to replace Christ for Christmas: Xmas. Chris is the secret weapon--He is a twin of Harry's and was whisked away to the States to grow up undetected. That's the big national security matter.
And then I was going to have them all giving up the throne to farm. But Will wants to act, so he goes to California and gets a new nickname, as he comes in with hayseed in his pockets. They give him the nickname: The Beverly Hill-Billy. I don't know what Harry does. I think he paints. I said they all quit the throne and open an art gallery. Will is curator, Kate too, and Charles and Harry paint, but I then decided that wasn't becoming, to advertise one's own art after being royal. Sort of selling oneself. They have an art museum and they work the land and act and dance. Charles dances like--you have no idea. He's not so stiff when he thinks no one is looking. He's very limber too. He puts on a very good comic act when he wants to as well. He knows how to jig. And Margaret, Princess Margaret loves violets. She insisted on having a canopy bed when she was a little girl, even though she already knew she was a Princess.
Prince Charles had a very brief interest in me TOO, but that was toOtally under wraps and he realized it was just some innocent fascination with my some personality traits I had in common with Diana. He loves Camilla, but then Camilla found out and asked him what was going on.
Harry's ex, well, she was so brokenhearted, Chelsey, that she made a public point with his interest in me. She had her eyes all black underneath from crying and stepped out wearing a HUGE Cameo piece of jewelry at her neck. Yeah, like I didn't miss THAT. I took ONE look and thought, "OH NO SHE KNOWS!" yeah, and imagine. For a frumpet like me.
Cheers. I thought she did really well, considering. I mean, I was thoroughly impressed.
1. Get photographed looking really sad and then,
2. Switch it up. Get photographed looking like you're having a grand time, drink in hand, and make him jealous and want her back.
I love you deeply and you hurt me and then "I'm having SO more more fun without you." I learned some really good things from Chelsea.
In the end scene, we're all pulling horses through the meadow and trying to get along.
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uh oh, getting the sad vibe. How do I make this funny again?
Everyone needs to laugh more. I told Alvaro once, "Who do you think I'd be better with? Prince Harry or Prince William?" Alvaro stared at me and said, firmly, shocked and then standing straight and staring me down, he said, "Prince ALVARO."
I still remember exactly where he was standing, and what he looked like when he said this. It was AL FINITE!
Anyway, I knew I was a Princess after I tried to sleep on a crappy sofa bed. My back was fine and then I slept on that bed and had to go to the ER. I knew there had to be a pea in that couch or something. It was like, "What tha...???" I was FINE on a normal mattress. But I had to be rushed to ER on a subpar mattress and then I knew it. "I KNEW it!" i said to msyelf, "I AM a PRINCESS!" and then I understood.
Anyway, when the Royal Courts lost me, they lost the next Fergie-in-House. I guess they decided one rambunctious redhead was enough.
I wouldn't get caught sucking on toes though. Oh, but she and I would TEAR up the town, er, courtyards. I think they really missed out. They really missed out on me. I could have brought a whole new kind of energy to the crew. Ah, c'est la vie.
So it all went down, and in the end, the King and Queen celebrate their good fortune in red and green. I don't think everyone is happy about it though. There were a few votes that weren't heard.
My father told me, "I believe you will raise people from the dead." I think Fr. Joachim would laugh and say "Yeah, from their graves." I want to raise people up, sure. I want to raise Hell, well once did I guess, which is sort of the same thing as raising people from the dead maybe. Who knows, maybe someone will be able to get enough courage to start over and lead a new life, like one from the dead. Maybe someone will have a second chance at life.
I do have a soulmate. Sure. And he knows who he is and hasn't told me yet. So I'm with the sistahs until he gets up the nerve to figure out what he wants. Granny wanted one of her daughters to name their kids "Valiant" like from Prince Valiant. Wouldn't that be tacky?
Anyway, Harry and I were going to stage a little drama at that last royal function, but he had his military duties and everything.
So anyway, Bainbridge and Seattle. Humph. Yeah. THAT was being fun. Um...I don't want to be a Princess unless I get bodyguards. So anyway, everyone over there was smoking cigarettes with the label "kings".
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I don't need a king or a prince. I just want someone who loves me who I can trust and have fun with. Who cares about the rest. That's what everyone wants.
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Vibe Could Be Wrong & Prayer
I feel I need to follow up on the last post. That officer, whoever she was, I didn't get the best feeling. HOWEVER, how do I know, for sure, without any kind of evidence, whether she is good or not or even where the vibe came from? Feelings are just that sometimes--feelings. Nothing more. And the other thing is, I could have been picking up on the fears of some of the others who were driving by. I've seen a lot of fear lately. Fear and worry on others' faces and I feel like I'm always trying to sidestep to make other people feel better or not be concerned.
It is true that was my first impression though. It was unnerving. Who knows. Maybe she wanted to park from a distance to see if it was true that I turned when eyes were on my back, who knows.
The other thing, is when I had a strong positive feeling in the hearing, that could have absolutely NOTHING to do with the fact that a woman and her family walked in at that moment. It could have a lot more to do with a connection I have with my son, whom I thought about and pray for, or with someone long distance or even just the need to pray period. I don't know what it's from, but I pay attention and then I let it go.
I know what I feel, but I think it's wrong for anyone to base games and judgement calls off of it. It's like there's been some kind of contest and I don't know what it's about but if I don't have a say or know about it, it's probably not something I really should have others involving me in, in any way at all.
I called for work today, and then I went to pray and then I'm going to work again.
When I got there for prayer, I just sat in silence for awhile. I didn't have any kind of vibe at all. Just nothing and just the need to wait. I prayed for general things and then when I thought about the books on the shelf, I actually started feeling a little bit of the good vibe--like I don't know if it's good or bad but it was something to pray for.
Then, I had several names come to mind. The other day I had this name "Jason" stand out in a big way. Then, the weirdest thing happened. I met him. I met the Jason I was praying for but I didn't even know his name was Jason. He showed up and I saw him and in my heart I knew "that's him". It was so odd, and it was a very good thing, and good experience. There was peace between us and I knew it but I hadn't even known what I was praying for.
When I got to the chapel I saw that there were three different kinds of roses. Pink and red next to the statue for Christ, and white for the statue for Mary. It made me think maybe there isn't a war of roses. They're all for the same thing. Peace.
I had the following names and countries come to mind today while praying. I have to say, I felt nothing different being in a chapel, but it was a quiet place to pray. I felt better when I was praying for the names and countries and locations, and then it really was sinking in when I left and was walking back. I saw there's a list of things one can pray for, for other people, which is good. I thought about it, but I spent about an hour there anyway so that was good enough. In a crowded house it's hard to find a place to pray sometimes.
I had a ton of names today. Some of them were repeats. I couldn't shake Emily for some reason. A few others:
Jonaquin
Esther
Marianne
Alicia
Emmet
Israel
Ishmael
Honduras
Peru
Alburquerque, NM
Iceland
Bosnia
Georgia
Mike N.'s family
Angelina
Austria
Cameron
Drew (had this one the other day)
Justin
Aaron
Conner
Emmanuel
George
Ben
Syrie
Magdalena
Chantel
Alison (big one but I don't know why)
Desiree
Jeremy
Joe
Donatto
Ezra
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For example--regarding the vibe...I felt it very strongly from 12:30 p.m. PST and on, but what does that mean? I was smoking outside just thinking about the names to pray for. So I don't think it means anything except that I have a calling to pray for others.
I'm not in love with anyone, nor am I with anyone, nor have I heard anyone refer to me as their soul mate, so I think it's wrong to assume this has something to do with any man.
Last night I couldn't sleep and just kept waking up and falling asleep again. Then this morning there was an absence of any kind of vibe at all.
It is true that was my first impression though. It was unnerving. Who knows. Maybe she wanted to park from a distance to see if it was true that I turned when eyes were on my back, who knows.
The other thing, is when I had a strong positive feeling in the hearing, that could have absolutely NOTHING to do with the fact that a woman and her family walked in at that moment. It could have a lot more to do with a connection I have with my son, whom I thought about and pray for, or with someone long distance or even just the need to pray period. I don't know what it's from, but I pay attention and then I let it go.
I know what I feel, but I think it's wrong for anyone to base games and judgement calls off of it. It's like there's been some kind of contest and I don't know what it's about but if I don't have a say or know about it, it's probably not something I really should have others involving me in, in any way at all.
I called for work today, and then I went to pray and then I'm going to work again.
When I got there for prayer, I just sat in silence for awhile. I didn't have any kind of vibe at all. Just nothing and just the need to wait. I prayed for general things and then when I thought about the books on the shelf, I actually started feeling a little bit of the good vibe--like I don't know if it's good or bad but it was something to pray for.
Then, I had several names come to mind. The other day I had this name "Jason" stand out in a big way. Then, the weirdest thing happened. I met him. I met the Jason I was praying for but I didn't even know his name was Jason. He showed up and I saw him and in my heart I knew "that's him". It was so odd, and it was a very good thing, and good experience. There was peace between us and I knew it but I hadn't even known what I was praying for.
When I got to the chapel I saw that there were three different kinds of roses. Pink and red next to the statue for Christ, and white for the statue for Mary. It made me think maybe there isn't a war of roses. They're all for the same thing. Peace.
I had the following names and countries come to mind today while praying. I have to say, I felt nothing different being in a chapel, but it was a quiet place to pray. I felt better when I was praying for the names and countries and locations, and then it really was sinking in when I left and was walking back. I saw there's a list of things one can pray for, for other people, which is good. I thought about it, but I spent about an hour there anyway so that was good enough. In a crowded house it's hard to find a place to pray sometimes.
I had a ton of names today. Some of them were repeats. I couldn't shake Emily for some reason. A few others:
Jonaquin
Esther
Marianne
Alicia
Emmet
Israel
Ishmael
Honduras
Peru
Alburquerque, NM
Iceland
Bosnia
Georgia
Mike N.'s family
Angelina
Austria
Cameron
Drew (had this one the other day)
Justin
Aaron
Conner
Emmanuel
George
Ben
Syrie
Magdalena
Chantel
Alison (big one but I don't know why)
Desiree
Jeremy
Joe
Donatto
Ezra
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For example--regarding the vibe...I felt it very strongly from 12:30 p.m. PST and on, but what does that mean? I was smoking outside just thinking about the names to pray for. So I don't think it means anything except that I have a calling to pray for others.
I'm not in love with anyone, nor am I with anyone, nor have I heard anyone refer to me as their soul mate, so I think it's wrong to assume this has something to do with any man.
Last night I couldn't sleep and just kept waking up and falling asleep again. Then this morning there was an absence of any kind of vibe at all.
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