Thursday, September 30, 2010

Hits with Putin--Misses in the Kitchen

I thought about it and I think it's okay to reveal a couple of my correct impressions. For one thing, it might help my credibility with regard to getting my son back...please pay attention U.S. and Washington state especially. For the second thing, I thought, since I had already posted a description of what I got, without saying who, why not just confirm it?

Some things I haven't made mention of at all, and those things I won't reveal or post more about.

The little line about seeing someone wearing cream and around maybe gold, or pale yellow and cream or ivory hues, was Putin. I asked God, not really focusing though, what he was wearing that day and it was about 8:30 P.M. or something and I thought, he must be out of bed already. I am pretty sure it was evening for me and I was thinking it was morning for him and not the other way around but I might go back and refresh my memory for better accuracy.

I saw him in cream or with a slight hint of yellow, wasn't sure, and I didn't know if it was short sleeved or long sleeved but I knew somehow that it wasn't an oxford style shirt. I wasn't sure if the other blurred color behind was his bedroom or a location. I didn't know. Then, I saw a photo later and it looked like it was cream sort of, his shirt, under a beige jacket. Then today I saw a photo of him at an industrial facility and all the colors surrounding correspond to what I got. I might post a link to the photo. Here is one:

I was accurate with my impression. However, I was slightly dubious, wondering if the photo or background was arranged after I'd written something but probably not (why would anyone do that? I just doubt myself sometimes). I would have to look at times. It's at an industrial place in a town that starts with S. I had not seen any photos of that day when I had the impression. I also had just the clothing maybe, initially and then later when I thought about it, these other colors (it may have been later, came to mind). Can't remember order but it was all without seeing the photos first. I thought maybe too, they put the photo out, to be helpful, since it is a nice confirmation of a kind.

I only add this because I had already posted something anyway. I really just want my kid back. My son, Oliver. He is rightfully my child and was taken from me improperly and I'm being told it will be "years" in court when someone could just cut through all of that and make it happen. He never should have been removed in the first place. I want my child.

The person with snaps who I saw snappin (on that one occasion) was, I thought (and I could be wrong) Philip, Duke of Edinburgh.

I saw someone playing piano but not sure who it was. I thought I got a glimpse of my Dad playing at one time, and then later it was someone else and I think this person had blond hair and was sort of a young man but I couldn't tell. I really didn't know with that one, for sure. If anything, I suppose it could have even been my Dad, when he was younger, because his hair was (almost) flaxen blond then. I typically don't get anything about my own family. I don't know why, I just don't.

This afternoon, after finding a good preventative Cure for Diabetes (I suppose it's much more prevention than cure once you have it, but still), I met with a lawyer and talked and then after that I got to the house and there were new things from a market and I had to clear space so I made some things quickly. Most of it isn't that good, because I'm missing ingredients I needed, like real butter, and whole milk (only had a little left) and vanilla extract and other spices. And I needed a blender too.

I tried this fig yogurt that was really good, by Hera. I was surprised at how good it was.

I first wanted to make use of zucchini (tons of it) and some mozarella and basil that was really dying, so I threw whole fresh (but wilted) basil into tomato sauce, simmered with fresh mushrooms, added fresh zucchini, lots of garlic powder (no real garlic) and pepper and then layered this with ziti and mozarella, in a pan and baked it. I guess a baked ziti.

Then I wanted to make use of some, what I thought was, yellow squash, but later realized it wasn' was a kind of yellow zucchini. I wanted squash! So I boiled the yellow things thinking they were maybe squash and added cumin and wanted other indian seasonings I didn't have, and then pureed with a beater bc there was no blender. Then I was going to add fig yogurt. The plan was for a creamy yellow indian/med. soup but then I realized it was zucchini and hoped I could use the yogurt and cucumber to add and make it more of a cucumber soup but I couldn't puree the cucs, so I lightly cooked and then strained and added the yogurt and it was bland and thin so added dill to make it more of a dill-cucumber-yogurt thing and I might just end up pouring it over salmon before making fish next time. I don't know.

Then I tried to make no-bake cookies, but no real butter like I like and no Hersheys cocoa so I used peanut butter and Swiss Miss mix and a little milk and margarine and then the quick oats, but it won't firm up. The flavor is fine, there is just not enough cocoa and maybe too much peanut butter or didn't cook long enough. Made 2 dozen.

Then I didn't want to throw this good organic whole grain bread out, when it only had a couple of small spots of mold on the corner, so I broke off those parts and crumbled it into a dish and then cracked 12 eggs to extract the yolk from the whites. Left whites in the bowl for egg-white omelettes sometime and then was using the yolk with a little whole milk I still had, and sugar, and it was making a nice pudding, which I was then going to mix with the bread and bake a little, but I ruined it by adding 1% milk and it made it more of a custard and runny and then I poured it over the bread that was broken up, in a glass bread pan, and let it set up in oven on bake. It needs raisins and a little more sugar, maybe a pinch of salt, and it also needs vanilla extract and I should have just used the small amount of pudding with whole milk rather than dilute and add 1%. I like bread pudding with raisins too. It's healthful and the kind I grew up with. My mom made it all the time.

I did find a cookbook while looking for a blender but I didn't use it. I know some of the basics about cooking and just pinch here and there and pour and stir. But I am missing some of the main things I need to make it right. At any rate, I didn't let any food go to waste.

Someone brought in kippered herring and I threw it out bc there was no expiration date on it and I looked at the wrapper and just didn't know. So I tossed it. I don't like mystery dates with regard to packaged foods. Some things keep a little after the date marked and some things just don't.

Oh, and last night or the night before I made a picante salsa but it's super hot and needs a little lime and of course, chips to go with. It is HOT! I thought, as I was cutting up one green jalapeno, these other yellow peppers would be fine. Maybe they were "anaheim peppers?" They were not banana peppers--they were much hotter than red chili peppers and jalepenos. And I add 1 jalapeno and 2 of those other ones to a medium bowl of salsa. I think this is why I am not catching a cold. :) I couldn't remember how hot on the rating scale. I added 2 of them and was drinking a lot of milk and eating oatmeal after that. Then, even though I had washed my hands, the next morning I almost had blisters on a few of my fingers where I had held them down as I minced with my other hand. It lasted for over 24 hours, that burn. I know the salsa has to be even hotter now, now that it's had a day to sit and be absorbed into the onions and tomato.

I was most disappointed about the chilled soup I tried to make. It could have been really good, if I'd had the right squash and then added that fig yogurt. The yogurt is delicious but needs to be paired correctly. I make a good east indian curry style rice with saffron, tumeric, a little cumin or coriander, and sometimes then a dash of curry mix. with sweetener. With fig...hmm...I don't know. That yogurt, the Hera fig one, is really, really good though. It's a good dessert on it's own. I might have to get some for Granny sometime.

(diabetes cure? at bottom) wardrobe guesses & classical music

I haven't solidly focused or prayed about anyone's wardrobe stuff. It takes only a few minutes, but it feels intense and I get tired, though I don't know why bc I used to pray for a long time every day. I don't think I was focusing for impressions then though.

So I have only had a few moments where I sort of absentmindedly wondered, and nothing else, and I found today that, I would like to know the timing of certain photos, but accurate confirmation on some things, and then other stuff I just can't find. One thing from today I was wrong about I think, another idle guess, but it might have been for someone else because I was just allowing thoughts to drift and sort of aligning but not really.

One thing was so precise it is a little shocking, and yet I would like to know what time of the photo to see if it was a remote viewing, a probable coincidence, or premonition.

But yes, I still feel it's best to not share details, maybe just a small bit and only check things on my own, which I feel, is my instruction for now, and it seems right.

I do believe, on the one where it is precise, I think I did spend a little half-hearted effort or prayer about it, and it turned out to be correct. But I do recall having the person in mind and then getting the general colors and then found later that it was true.

There are a lot of things I simply can't check. No photos for that day. And it's sort of pointless if I haven't even prayed about it. I am not, for example, a walking "eye" where I just pick up on stuff random all the time no matter what. I have to ask (ask and you shall receive). When I get random stuff, it's usually a surprise to me and something that benefits others, like when I knew to tell this one woman that her son was going to be alright. I had no cluse what I was talking about, but knew I was supposed to say it, and it meant something to her...that sort of thing.
Last night I found classical piano and other pieces I liked. I only listened to a few songs, but 2 of the songs were by Bach and piano. One got sort of cut off and went to commercial and then it was I heard a cisterian monk song, and then English Suite 5 in E minor, which I loved and I said, to the housemate, "this one has counterpoint." I told him, "I don't exactly know what counterpoint is, but this one has it, and it comes and goes throughout the piece (or sections)." I said something about how the separate hands were doing something I couldn't describe but it was counterpoint. Then I would say, "Now it's not there..." and then he said, "Well yeah, each hand plays a different part" and I said, "No, I know that, but there is something different about counterpoint and this music has it but I forgot the definition and I don't know enough about music terminology." It was really beautiful. I squeezed about 30-45 mini-oranges ? (clementines) for juice while listening to it. Then they played Concerto for flute and orchestra in D major (Cecile Chaminade) by the London Philharmonic and I then said out loud, after a couple of bars, "It's Snow White in the woods!" He laughed and I said, "Really! There are all the little birds and animals gathering, and the light is filtering through the trees. The woodsman is in the background but it's not known yet." I then sat down and just listened to this one. I haven't heard many flute pieces, but this one was exquisite...fairytale music I thought.

I told him I was going to write these 2 down because I wanted to look them up and see if I was right about counterpoint for English Suite 5 in E minor (and I was!--and whatever it is, I love it! It makes me feel like conducting one way with one hand and another way with the other hand).
My favorite parts of the music were the parts with counterpoint. At least in this piece.

Then I turned to christian music after I'd played a little variety all day and went to bed. Sang in the shower I guess, and then went to bed.

There was one small section of the Chaminade piece that reminded me of Superman movie music. Just a very small section. And then I wondered how the flutist was able to take such deep breaths and control it so well.
This morning I thought more about Ganesh and Parvati but I have a lot to do today and am working on some research and need to settle into it. I've stayed up late (no psychic spying attempts I'm afraid) and I don't like getting up later in the morning. I like to be out of the door early to make the most of the business day hours.

Looked up symbols for Ganesh. I looked up, this morning, the meaning of the symbolism behind all of the detail in the Ganesha paintings.
Last night I told this guy who is diabetic that I would try to think of things that raise blood sugars in a healthy way. I think he was wrong about some things bc he said potatoes were bad and I was thinking they might be good, like whole grains, because your body converts the starches to a healthy sugar, but maybe not. I said I would wait and see if something comes to mind for a good diabetic diet and this morning for some reason, "cabbage" came to mind, which doesn't make any sense to me so I'm looking it up. too low is bad and too high is bad. I typed in cabbage and get a lot about balancing. but I don't really know why cabbage. It looks like it's a cure for ulcers, from all the sites. It's also a blood purifier and boosts estrogen which works to counteract against precursors to colon cancer. I see it as a "balancer" but not finding research about it's worth as a cure, though it is listed in naturopath sites of maybe 1 of 8 or 10 or so items which are thought to be, in combination, a natural cure for diabetes. It's used to eliminate engorgement and swelling, which made me also think about this man I met yesterday who had gout and he said it was a "swelling" and I looked it up and cabbage is good for gout. (all kinds of cabbage: red, green, purple, white, the yellowish one...they're all included).

But still looking up the diabetes link. I guess with diabetes, it's partly genetic and partly environmental and about working with what you've got. The beans, greens, fruit, spicy, rice and fish countries seem to have a lower incidence rate, in general but there are other countries that consume that stuff with higher incidence. Asia has lowest incidence rate but then I found India (sort of different) at the top of the list. Not sure why.

With cabbage, the top producers are China, India, and Russia but I don't know if they are consuming it themselves or exporting (don't know with India). It is to be used with caution for those who have thyroid problems.

Because of glucosinolates, broccoli, brussel sprouts and cabbage are a good inhibitor of cancer growth, esp. in organs, according to wiki on glucosinolates.

Cabbage is high in Vitamin C and glucosinolates and because it has something to do with glucose (a sugar) I wanted to look it up to see what the mechanisms are in the body, for diabetes. Additonally, some of the countries with the lowest rates of diabetes have cabbage as a staple. Macedonia for example. Mexico is listed as being lower for rates of diabetes and they use cabbage. China and Korea, where they eat forms of pickled cabbage (suan cai or kim-chi). Japan, ..I don't know how Japan might use cabbage. Russia eats a lot of cabbage but it might just mitigate against some fattier foods they incorporate in the diet. I'm not saying cabbage is a cure. Just curious. At toxic levels they can be goitrogens (problems with goiter, in the throat, due to toxic affects on thyroid) however at the right level or sub-toxic levels, they inhibit tumor growth and regulate horomones, which is a factor in diabetes. I guess the U.S. is pretty high for cancer studies, but not as much for diabetes.

Cabbage is also high in sulfur and nitrogen and sulfur is needed, according to the medical articles, to produce insulin.

It's the glucosinolates that contain nitrogen and sulfur and contribute to the bitter taste of cabbage, brocolli, and brussel sprouts.

I looked up fish because of the higher rates of consumption in the countries that also eat cabbage (in general) and fish is also touted as good for diabetes and when I looked up the content, it said it's particularly high in lysine and sulphur amino acids. The studies are describing how Omegas might benefit diabetes but it might just be the sulphur. I don't know.

Sulphur again, which is supposed to help with production of the body's natural insulin.

The Asian countries consume the most fish, and Near East countries of India, Pakistan and Nepal were the lowest consumers (according to

Both India and Pakistan were on lists for higher rates of diabetes and they are low consumers of fish, with is high in sulphur. On one list I found, India had the highest rate, with the U.S. at #3.

From my research, most of the countries with the lowest rates of diabetes, are highest consumers of fish as well as cabbage which both are very rich in sulphur, which might help with natural regulation of insulin.

Some of the countries were high in producing or consuming one thing (cabbage) but not the other (fish) and then there were mitigating factors like having the rest of the food on the heavy or fattier side. For example, Germany may eat sauerkraut, but the rest of the food might be on the heavy side, so it only acts as a mitigator, as with Russia. India is a top producer of cabbage but I don't know how much is exported. If they do eat it, they are also the lowest consumers of fish. Pakistan rises to top 10 diabetes lists and they are also listed as lowest fish consumers. The countries which are ranking lowest for rate and incidence of diabetes are both cabbage and fish consuming countries.

I should have cited all the places I went as I found these things out, but maybe some other time.
I didn't get the information from one site. I got it by following a line of reason, and checking different things out and then making a tentative conclusion.

Cabbage came to mind so I looked up nutritional content. I compared this with info about diabetes. I then found out why cabbage is a top fighter and that led to another site about how glucosinolates are high in sulphur which led to to finding how this regulates natural insulin. I then wondered about fish since a lot of the countries with low rates seemed to be higher consumers of fish and then separately looked up what is in fish and found they are particularly high in, again, sulphur. Which then led me to to a site where I found the countries that were ranking high in diabetes (india and pakistan) which are usually good about eating veggies, are lowest with eating fish. And then decided one small factor, possibly, with regard to countries that are ranking lowest in diabetes is the fact that they have a diet which consists of foods that are naturally regulating and helping to promote healthy production of insulin. I had to go to maybe 20-30 different sites to then develop a tentative guess.

2 cautions: be careful with toxic levels of cabbage, which could affect thyroid (at extreme levels) and be careful of toxic levels of fish (if that fish is the kind which is high in mercury or other possible contaminants). If fish oil contains the sulphuric properties that fish does, I would get this, and maybe distilled, but I am not sure which things are distilled out.

I guess that's my medical digression of the day. (and thanks to God for the help)

Wednesday, September 29, 2010

Problems With Laptop Overheating Now

The overheating is very bad and it is happening at Safeway.

I believe this kind of thing is only done with something in near proximity because when I go to the larger college library, it doesn't happen because I think it's harder for someone to smuggle in whatever they need, or they don't have as many willing participants.

I am absolutely positive that it is a more local thing and as I say this, now someone has quit something.

When I went to the large college, and used the desktop, it never happened. I could go to some cafe with my laptop and depending on where I was and who was around, it would start up, but it never happened at the library except for one time and it was different and mild and and much much lighter. It is somehow hard to effect, there. I don't know why. Someone might be afraid of getting caught I suppose.

Which would mean it's not from a satellite (I don't think). At least not this, in general, or it's something to do with the laptop which could happen anywhere but is impossible to effect on a desktop that other people could use any given moment, in a larger space.

The other thing that tips me off, is how many people in THIS town KNOW and act like they know, when it is occuring. These people know about this kind of thing, and think it's a big surprise when someone ends up fully dead. They go for torture here. They support and share torture techniques, but stop one shade short of killing. And then when someone finds out who is behind it and takes action, they act like it's a big surprise.

So that suggest locality. It makes it clear that this is something that is done local or is shared on a local level with other people. Maybe not a lot of people, but enough to stand out.

It may be on a larger level, but it is something that is at least passed down to locals so it is or gives the appearance of being local. I would say, it's local.

It's quit for now.

I think now that the exchange student from Korea is gone, someone is trying to start things up with my son again. I think it's good when there are other people there because they are independent witnesses who are harder to control with intimidation because they can say whatever they want at any time, in a different language as well. So I think when things happen to my aunt or uncle or their family or my son, with the kind of pressure they have from certain people, and state workers, they're more likely to do whatever to make others happy, whereas someone who is an exchange student or from out of the area, is more likely to say "fuck you" and say it in Korean. At least someone or certain groups cannot be sure they are able to control someone who is an "outsider" (at least to some degree) because that person might turn around and report their ass and testify as to the validity of my and other persons' claims.

The reason no one has "got" me is because I may not be perfect, but I haven't been corruptible number 1, and number 2, I have nothing to hide that someone could try to use against me in blackmail of any kind.

Since I can't be corrupted or blackmailed, I get "set up" and that's supposed to discredit me and keep me from getting my son back or exposing the truth, if needed, about others.

I somehow managed, to be full of flaws and problems, but I don't owe anyone anything and I have never done anything that I would be ashamed to talk about or have others know.

I believe my family has had high standards too, but because they are trying to protect my son, and care, if someone starts ordering them around, using police or other government authority and by intimidation, they will feel more pressured to go along to keep peace and it's not that they've done anything wrong at all.

So far, with the serious grace of God, I am "okay". Not perfect by any means, and my own worst enemy (mmm, no, I wouldn't torture myself, so no)...let's say, I might not always do what I should do like anyone, but I haven't succumbed, at the lowest lows, to pressure.

I guess that's why I have a general sense of peace and feel like things can work out. Because it will work out.

Anyway, I had just been wondering if I should try praying about,...stopping myself...I would really like to know if Judge Shea DOES have a loose tooth! wouldn't that be something! only his dentist knows for sure I guess, or him. If it's not him I guess maybe my son since I transitioned from praying for my son to then Judge Shea.

But I was thinking about asking for something maybe from head persons in government or agencies just in Washington. I was thinking, "Dept. of Defense? CIA? who should I focus on and ask God for something hidden?" and then I thought, why not just bring it to Washington maybe, and not necessarily in a negative way, I mean, getting stuff about Judge Shea's mom isn't negative at all, but just focus on people who are more immediate and can influence things. maybe in tandem with praying out there to larger heads or something. But I haven't settled on anything. I know I have to wait and allow the right thing to be in mind to pray about and then pray. In the "will of God" so to speak and then it will be much easier.

I don't even know if Judge Shea's mother is still alive or what. I assumed it was her. A little old lady. If she was a strapping 6'0 or 5'11, I don't think that was her. I don't know how tall Shea is. I can't even find a photo for him.

Ah, I cheated. I found a photo. Well, it may have been his mother. I don't know for SURE. But when I saw the photo of HIM with white hair, I thought "Did I see his mother or was I seeing the Judge?" (just kidding). Maybe his mom didn't have white hair like him though, when she was older. Just because he does, doesn't mean she does/did. But it was white, the woman that I saw had white hair, not gray or colored. I sort of thought it was curly or wavy somehow and short. I don't think his hair, the Judge's, looks curly or wavy...just looked again. I guess his hair has a slight wave above his ear. I saw her hair as more curly like hair set curly and white, and then I thought it must be the Judge's mother. But I leave room open for being wrong. Maybe it's some other older woman. I suppose, if he's shy of 70 years old and she had him at a fairly young age, she's alive. I wish I knew. I might be right about 1 thing and not other things, or not right at all. Again, I didn't have the strongest connected feeling but I got a few things after I said a short prayer. I'll pray more later. I guess seeing his photo helped give me a little more confidence to say something about his "maybe" mom. Seeing his snow white hair seems to be a possible indicator or confirmation that maybe if white hair is in the genes, this was right. But again, I may be wrong. It might have been someone else and that way too, it's more private bc only the Judge would know so who can say.

He sure doesn't look like a man who would have a loose tooth. Either that was for my son or it's a small thing that doesn't bother him much, that's in the back or something, like a molar, I wouldn't know. I just got something about someone with a loose tooth.

Parvati and Ganesha and Bees & Beetles

Looking up Parvati and the story attached, and other stories, as well as Ganesha. The stories are as intricate and well developed as most of the paintings and art. A lot of attention to fine detail.

I looked up Parvati on wikipedia and then Ganesha in several other contexts.

Today I had a black beetle settle on me, from out of nowhere, and a ladybug, after the bumblebee. The ladybug had the odd coloring again and I swear it's government work--something to do with the Air Force project of teleportation. Something changes or alters the natural color of these ladybugs. I might be wrong....maybe they are naturally a different color.

I looked at some Eastern Indian tablecloths today and other art.

I was going to buy something for my son, but I couldn't decide what and I don't know what he has already. So I wanted to call and find out.

There has been mixed energy all day today. Good and then bad.

I have to file something about Mykal Holt, against her "judgement" for money claiming I owe her rent when I on't and when she owes me my Hope Chest back and a lot of other things. The woman has nerve. She even has cancer, supposedly (I guess some have even questioned this) and she has plenty of aggression to take out on innocent people who she deliberately tried to upset from the very start. She's even had videotape of me sent out to other people, when I went dancing at the place her brother owns or co-owns. At least, this is what I was told, and then other things got back to me as well, trying to make me look bad.

What is strange is how many people have gone together to try to make me look bad.

I should leave some major civil suits I guess, for later, to be dealt with in strength and properly, and then take on a couple of small things which could just be nailed right off the bat. Naming, like, one person.

I could at least isolate 1 or 2 smaller things that would be clean and clear cut and not complicated, and then leave the big stuff for down the road, if needed an if I'm still having problems.

Will have to think about which thing to file first I guess because there is a LOT.

I have to put an injunction on the collection of the judgement she was awarded, if I can't appeal it, and then take the other things to court.

All I need, is a straight shot.

Bow and arrow straight shot. One.

I still have to talk to this one lawyer who's interested in my toxic mold claim too. If I have that firm working on the toxic mold, I can take care of something else. One small thing at a time.

Civil Suits: Timing

Just as I write "civil suits" and "timing", who should come around the corner, randomly, but a main legal figure in town. Whose name I should probably not repeat at this time.

He will later read this and wonder. I'm sure.

I might wait on this post for awhile. I wasn't going to write anything big anyway.

I was beginning to pray at my house and had to leave bc I had no privacy, so I just left for now.

Judge Edward Shea impression & other (updated)

I am not sure if I got some correct impressions regarding Judge Shea or not. I asked, and I got some stuff, but when I prayed the connection was different because I felt heavy hearted at the time.

I sensed sadness, from the time I posted about what happened to me with police this morning, until maybe recently, on my way walking to drop some things off.

The impressions I got were really different.

I wrote them down but I am going to just wait on it and pray more later at some point and consider.

Very different.

Haven't tried to guess anything or pray about anything else really. Other than for the return of my son and a smoother path. That's about it.
I've decided to write down what I got, because I felt God wants me to, and also to protect from the idea that I am attempting to manipulate this Judge my way. He should distribute justice because of justice, not because of concern about what I might say. True for all.

And again, I wasn't in the full mode of prayer but I did pray first. I also think a couple things are possibly mixed with maybe my son and then him bc I asked God to show me how my son was doing (which never happens) and then just went straight to the Judge and asked for hidden things.

I got teeth. That Judge Shea has a loose tooth.

This is one thing I questioned bc I thought well maybe it's my son who has the loose tooth, bc it died after he hit it on a table awhile ago. But hey, it is very possible that God was telling me, "Judge Edward Shea has a loose tooth!"

The other thing I got was some older woman and I wondered if it was his mother. Don't want to write too much about that right now.

The next thing, no way someone else could have sent this to me or anything. I got a murder scene. So I am thinking, it is possibly a case Judge Shea had at some point, or who knows, it was an important matter to someone he knew.

I saw a man getting shot, point blank. He had dark brown hair (I think) and his arms went out to the side. He was then dragged through some kind of woodsy area or forest, to some kind of water. Lake? pond? I don't know. Just dragged to water. I think he was shot from the front.

Then, a couple of other minor things, but this is just what I got in about 5 minutes and like I said, I would have to pray about everything more.

I hope that the Judge has a good day! :)

(Oh no, I say this and then I find out there is a possible few conflicts of interest, but he can still have a good day. Just looking at things right now)

Another Confrontation w/an Officer: treats me like a dog

I had the same officer who stalked me last month or before, who I called in, pull into my path again. Just looking for trouble and, I feel, wanting to be intimidating.

He wanted to arrest me. He saw me, walking a certain direction and then pulled into the path and just sat there. So I simply asked if there was a reason he felt he needed to be in my "path" and he started yelling or threatening and then I yelled to leave me alone and was walking away and he got out of his car and kept yelling at me.

Then, he had his day because he stood there and pointed a finger at me and said, "Sit". This is the K-9 dog guy. The same one who arrested me last time. He is the only officer that I've ever felt sort of has stalked me on occasion. I said, "Are you serious? for what?" and he said "Disorderly conduct" which came right after I said, as he was coming after me, that I didn't want to have to get a restraining order against him. So I said, "you have to be kidding me." He pointed to the step and said, "SIT."

Then he said, "If you don't sit, I will arrest you for resisting arrest." So I sat down.

Then, all these people driving by and oh boy, if I ever had the opportunity to be threatened on occasion, just to see what kind of sleazy creatures craw out from hiding beneath the rocks to gloat at me, I would.

There were too many to write down, but one in particular really caught my attention and I wrote it down. Truck, older man, A92800X. He was so glad, and in a secretive way, it drew my attention. He also made a point of making eye contact, and something told me to write down his plates. I am not sure why. But there were SO many people. It was like a whole parade of people driving by, relishing the moment. Really sad. This time, I hardly saw a friendly or normal or concerned face.

Then I was sitting there and this bumblebee, a very fat sort of pretty one, came and rested on my upper chest, like a little broach. It just sat there and by that time Officer West was there and said, "You have a bee on your shirt" and I looked and just brushed it off nonchalantly. I didn't jump or anything. Insects are friends. It's people who behave like insects who might not be friends.

I wasn't sure what to think. About the bee. It wasn't a dove exactly. I didn't know if it was the marker of another mind game or if it was a nice little protective note. It was just a bee. But still, in a way I guess, it felt friendly. It went away after I brushed it off and wasn't pestering, just rested on my shirt.

So I explained what had happened and I was allowed to go and then I walked to a coffee place and only then did I really cry. Mainly because he had had the nerve to treat me like a dog and tell me to sit. When I knew he had deliberately put himself in my path and was expecting me to approach him. Well, not approach exactly, I had to go by as that is where I was headed, but I didn't have to say anything. The only reason I did was because I had noticed he'd turned all the way around to park there when he saw me coming.
I woke up really early this morning and something felt very unsettled. I then fell asleep and didn't wake until 8 and then made breakfast for the person whose house I stay at. I made bisquits and gravy (first time I've made gravy), hashbrowns with shredded pork, sauerkraut on the side, and unsweetened apple sauce. And coffee.

I thought it reminded me of sort of American, sort of German fare. Then I just looked it up and it's also maybe Pennsylvania Dutch (which I am, in small part).

I don't like bisquits and gravy but then I found out it's one of his favorites. I just squeezed some little oranges and made orange juice for myself and had coffee. Didn't feel like eating.
Another Officer (?) in an undercover SUV who harassed me while driving by (and I don't know who it was) was in a vehicle with plates 21235D. I believe it was a government vehicle. I am not sure who it was or which department he would be from and he was using the car at about 2:30 P.M. thereabouts.

I saw other officers today, who maybe looked my direction, or passed, or whatever, but nothing out of the ordinary until this man. He most likely, my that he has something to hide. But I don't know who he is or who he's even with. It was, at least, some kind of uniform that looked like a police or guard uniform.

Tuesday, September 28, 2010

my destroyed sweater

I am starting to wonder if, all this time, people have stolen my clothes to wear them themselves, out of jealousy, or to do some kind of ritual with them.

Today, after finding a machine near the house with "featherlight" on the label, I went to the garbage near the house (not our bins supposedly) to find one of my sweaters destroyed and placed in the garbage with a white feather. I noticed first because it was sticking out of the sack a little but not enough until after I saw the other thing and the next thing I did was uncover the sweater and found a feather with it. I have been wondering where some of my other items have gone as well, like my brown tank top.

To me, it looked like some kind of ritual thing. But then on the other hand, it was maybe the one combination of clothing I had that was somewhat classic and looked put together, out of all the mismatched things I happened to get, after having my other entire wardrobe stolen.

It was my hand knitted (in ireland) sweater that was lavendar. I know there are some in Ireland who may not be great, and whom I wouldn't want to be around, but there are a lot of good Irish people too, and I don't know why someone would do this.

It doesn't "mean" anything. Everyone around here tries to import meaning into the smallest things. The fact that I discovered this and took it out, "means" nothing. It doesn't mean bad news for someone, or good news, or anything symbolic. All that it "means" is that I had a sweater, which, regardless of who owned it before, where it was from, or whatever, I had imparted my own essence and energy into that article of clothing that became mine, and I owned it and to steal anything that belongs to me, is not okay with me.

It is not something I think is the worst thing. Like I've said, stealing or attempting to steal or destroy, a gift from God--that is the worst thing anyone can do and few will escape accountability for this, if done to me or my son.

Those who steal my clothes, if for good for some reason, I guess God bless them. God bless their efforts if, in some way, some group has some huge superstition about something and they are attempting to protect me or my son.

But as for any attempt to cast lots or make guesses about things, that has nothing to do with taking my clothing.

I have had almost every single article of clothing I have ever owned, stolen from me. If I add everything up, it would be enough to fill 2 walk-in closets. I am not kidding. And MOST of the clothing, I bought myself with my own money and they were good pieces, from Cache or Nordstrom and a few things cheap here and there, from H&M and other places. My shoes were usually from 9west where I went to bargain places and bought them new but discounted.

I am really tired of it.

If someone wants an article of clothing from me that badly, they should ask, because I would honestly probably give it to them if they liked it. I wouldn't give away everything, but I have done this in the past.

I have had thefts where someone stole just 1 item over time, untold number of times, to grand theft jobs where my entire closet was basically taken. It happened in a very good apartment complex in Oregon (which was supposedly gated, and where almost everything, including good wool coats and expensive imported things (which I got on discount) were stolen), at a sort-of normal apartment complex (where 2 loads of white and cream colored articles of clothing, almost all from Gap and Nordstrom were taken), to the confiscation of all of my clothing that I had which was a combination of gifts from my ex-fiance and clothing I had purchased myself on the East Coast.

That's not counting shoes and the destruction of some of my shoes. It's also not counting the missing underwear and bras (mainly underwear).

Ask. If you want something, like my panache, ask God and maybe He'll give you some of your own.

Definition of panache:
1. Dashing style: a sense or display of spirited style and self-confidence
2. Helmet plume: a plume or set of feathers, esp. on a hat or helmet.
There are also references to the white plume by Henry IV of France and more especially, in Cyrano de Bergerac.
Then, after I retrieved the sweater, I had all these people driving by with "Wow" and little finger to the eye in fake tear for sarcasm. Really nice stuff. Reeeeaaaaaally nice show.

The rest of my day, prior to later this afternoon, has been great. I am getting a lot done and while this man who is no good is still here, I am getting a few things accomplished even though I had to lie down for awhile because of migraine which was trying to come on. I pretty much got rid of it for now.
I looked Octavian's perfume page today and it's about the secrecy of perfumes. There is a page all in German and I don't know a word of German. I could try a humble guess and translation but I don't know how I'd do. I am only able to understand some parts. moscozon extra I've no idea, but understand parts of the paragraph; Ambra kunstlich I've no idea but maybe amber something?; Vert de lilas maybe spirit of lilacs or lilac spring; animalide 6666 for beast ?; azarine T 8187 ?no idea; tonkarome, no idea; prunella for plum?; resedal S 7615, no idea. I can understand some of the content but not everything. I'm able to tell whether it's a rich and warm fragrance (or supposed to be) or more of a light flowery one, that sort of thing, reading about what flowers, characteristics, and notes. By context, I'm able to tell if it's woodsy or general attributes and then what mediums it comes in (colonge, cream, perfume) and cost. I would have no idea how to pronounce it but I can read and understand most of it, having taken no German but extrapolating from what I know as an avid reader in the English language.

Usually I'm led to new sites out of curiosity or my own interests but maybe I should try pulling up a few new things for fun. maybe i'll choose 4.

I had in mind gypsy horse cart but didn't know what to click on and then the only song to come up was "here's the money my gypsy". then i typed in perfume with notes of peach and candlelight and got an online review for "very irresistable" sensual perfume by Givenchy.

How hilarious. Because then this college student got up and walked past me twice, wearing a peach fragrance. It was very light and I've smelled it before. Colonge spray.

Then I typed in perfume, strawberries and chardonnay and got Ed Hardy perfume by Christian Audigier.

I typed in perfume with butterscotch and musk and found too many to choose from. right off mainly found Burberry Brit Sheer. It describes both musk and butterscotch and then there was a en avril un soir some describe with these things. I don't know, just goofing off for a minute.

Last look-up brought up "L'eau Ambree" by Prada. I got it by typing in the following, "perfume, tapestry, gossamer threads of rose, mystere and that is what came up, from the blogger site of perfume reviews by "Perfume Shrine".

Did I turn Amber over?

Can I have my son back now?

Are we there yet?

Now I've found Septimanie Perfumes Pavillon des fleurs, Creed, from sniffapalooza and discovered the U.S. military fragrance and princess anne, all on the same page. Oh, wallis too...wally and eddy and some others. A beautiful silk wedding dress there, of Ambre Cannelle (just found name). still trying to find the words I used which pulled this site up. The Snifapalooza Magazine from April 3, 2008.

I typed in a search with "perfume, dynamic, unrelenting, ganesha, base and top notes" (don't remember order exactly) and got this site from this date. unrelenting is from a description of Creed. dynamic fits for Pink Room Parfum #1. Wait, it might fit for Pink Room Pour Toi. Either one I suppose. They're both in there.

Anyway, I love this dress, I assume it's a wedding dress, of Ambre Cannelle.

I think I'll stop there. It's been interesting! as usual. :) The fun of being pleasantly sidetracked for a few moments. Now back to work.

Reporting Steve May

This asshole is now going to the library I have been using. He just now showed his face, and went right over to the printer next to me to take his papers.

He has a fucking printer in his own house, and a lot of other places he can use as well and comes over here to intentionally put himself in my face.

Which means if this continues to occur, I will file a restraining order against him and the potential for a civil lawsuit is not done, nor are criminal allegations over.

I was just sitting here thinking about how he intentionally screwed me over and disseminated my personal information all over the place, including to people from the UK.

Some of the most horrible things possible occured while I stayed at his house, and then he vandalized my property, allowed strange men into my apartment while I was there (with no notice--a trespass), had friends delete information about the vehicle plates of the men who showed up in my apartment, and stole and distributed all of my personal belongings to people in the community including police.

He got away with it, with the help of some officers who bent over backwards to cover for him.

I was just sitting here thinking how I didn't like this energy around right now, and how he screwed me over, I was literally thinking about him, and he decides to come over to me, and stare.

Whoever he is aligned with, they did horrible, horrible, things to me while I stayed there. He also stole my paystubs from work while I was gone for a short time. No one else stole it, he did. I take that back. It is possible that the other housemates stole the paystub. I do not know. But he then threatened me when I said I was going to go to the police to make a report about it. He then kept everything I owned and parcelled things out to others and kept things. He left a Bible at the counter of this housing place, with a photo after he stole my photo albums even. When I went back to ask which photo it was (I mean, that is a sick thing to do and might be telling, to know which photo he selected out of all of my photos) and it was gone. No one wanted me to have the evidence then because they knew it was a sick thing to do. A police officer was the one to let me know there was a Bible with a photo inside of it that had been left for me.

This man is not a good person.

My legs swelled up to unbelievable proportions when I stayed at his house and I had other people in that neighborhood, or at this time, do ghastly things. There were extreme problems there.

He and some of those with him had access to my son which I did not approve. His own kids (sons) have major issues and I would never want them near my son.

That entire time at his house was a turning point for the worst. I was tortured there, just like I was tortured one time in the russian baptist church. This happened and happens, to MY SON, from the time he was a baby. It is inexcusable.

That is one time where I had a bad feeling about signing a contract with him and I went against my own instincts because it seemed like the only option. I was otherwise homeless and no one was renting to me, unless I was engaged. Everyone I tried to rent from just queried me about whether I was still with my fiance or not and if not, they weren't renting to me. I was set up to rent from this guy, May. It was the only option I had at the time, and even though it was a nice house and seemed like a decent set up, I remember the very day that I sat at the table in the Jeepers cafe with cars going by outside and I just had a bad feeling about signing in with him. I was ever so right. EVER so right! I am positive that I was also given things in my food or some kind of drug while I was there. There was more than one bad thing going on.

This was after what happened in Seattle and Bainbridge.

There's another guy here that I recognize as no good. Won't go into it. I am not going to reveal everything right now.


The bad vibe sort of left last night as I was leaving the library. The farther away I was, the better I felt. However, it was hard to discern because sometimes I've picked up on feelings of family or people close to me, and it's not that they are bad, it's just an empathetic feeling if someone is down (I guess).

I looked up the religious article on CNN first thing this morning. They then had a quiz from Pew Research, which I took. It was 10 questions and I missed 1. I didn't guess what some might think I would guess though. I should learn more about the Eastern religions because I have a pretty good handle on the other ones. I got the legal question right too--it was the one about Indonesia that I missed (I won't say what I chose in case others want to take the quiz).

It was shocking to read that the education level is that low, overall, with regard to religion in general, and they had Protestants and Catholics at the bottom (I think just for the U.S.). The Atheists and Agnostics were the highest scorers, it said. I am not sure how scientific the study is, and where they pooled from though, so that would affect everything.

I looked up Indonesia and then India, on wiki. The food featured in the photo for Indonesia made me is probably very good. I liked the motto of India, "Truth Alone Triumphs".

This morning I decided to ask for more help in getting insights to put pressure for people being willing to admit they were wrong, as I have done myself (or tried to, for my own benefit, God, and as an example), or to get involved in returning my son.

But I didn't have a lot of time to pray so I only got a very vague idea of something about Michelle Obama--a large wooden cooking spoon. That was this morning, at about 8-9 A.M. PST. I don't really see her cooking when they have a chef, but that is what came to mind, but without any focus or a good connection to prayer so it might not be that big of a deal.

Yesterday I got a passage from scripture, from Jeremiah about how the captives will be set free. I thought of myself and my son. Then, I got a passage out of Isaiah, about how since people did not listen to the peaceful waters of Shiloh, which asked for peace, there will come great floods in the future (it's metaphorical). That fits for me because for so long I only asked for peace. And some people didn't agree with that or want it. Then I read Job last night when God answers him out of the whirlwind, and Job reminds me of Psalms a lot.
Also, I forgot to mention, I had a strong impression of a young man playing piano yesterday. Must be classical pianist but not sure, all the way down the scales, to the very end and intricate. that was yesterday. don't remember what time.

Monday, September 27, 2010


snapping. 6:59 p.m. snapping buttons or unsnapping. man. on clothing. more than one snap. waist-up.

separate: yellow or golden and cream colored surrounding, maybe some white, but a lot of cream or ivory with golden hues. 5:45 p.m. approx. maybe earlier.

that's all that I feel like sharing. I didn't pray for new stuff today so that might be later. i probably need to write some funny stuff tonight, or try at least, to conjure some mirth.

My Cup Runneth Over (random readings today)

I stopped at this place, thinking it might be a day where there is a food bank and I was right. I went in to pick up things for my son and put everything that was not expired into a bag for him, and some cupcakes.

There were 6 packages of cupcakes on the table so I had the idea come to mind, to pray and do a random reading.

Maybe today is a day of peace and unity because it seemed I got something for everyone, and lot of christian stuff from England and U.S.

I didn't look and selected from the church bookshelves and decided I would pull out 6 books and then go in order of which one I turned over.

When I went in, I noticed a cup on some kind of altar thing. After I came in someone removed it. I only thought about it when I turned over my first book and it said, "thou preparest a table before cup overflows..." and thought of the cup and how I had also placed a cup full of water in a "Dad" cup on the windowsill, thinking of my Dad, my family, and my son.

So I will list what I wrote down and the excerpts I got:

1. Roadside Tables by Alberta Lunger: thou preparest a table before cup overflows...". 1960 by Bethany Press.
pg. 49, Chapter V. With Jesus at the table of forgiveness (in simon the pharisee's house). "Jesus must have loved the twilight hours. work was finished. There was a certain feeling of leisure in every household--children would gather round to listen to stories. All young foks were delighted when jesus came. He was ready to tell them stories. Unlike their experiences with most adults, they felt joy in his presence. They knew they were wanted. (then it goes on to speak of how we are to have the hearts of children and simon was not like a child and criticized the woman who poured expensive oil on the feet of Jesus.)

2. The Religion of Jesus and Love: the law of life--Toyohiko Kagawa. Copyright 1931. Britain and U.S. John C. Winston Co.
pg. 100-101 (preceding pages all about wonderful mothers and then on pg. 100 how a sword pierced the heart of Jesus' mother to see his suffering. 101, "Jesus was silent for awhile, and then, after taking the sour wine, he aid, "It is finished." This does not mean that everything was ended, but rather that matters were accomplished. That is, that he had walked the full length of the path that had to be covered. Nelson's words in the naval battle of Trafalgar, "Thank God I have done my duty, " are beautiful words. Should we not be grateful for Jesus' words, "It is finished, " which he said in the hour of his seeming defeat?

3. Britain In Old Photographs: the market towns of Leicestershire and Rutland by Trevor Hickman. By Sutton publishing (the man is, haha, wearing a turqoise shirt). Pg. 86, Memorial to Sir Frank Whittle, who "pioneered the design of the jet engine in 1936. I landed on a sculpture of a jet plane.
(I wrote, "some tall structure in background" and looked it up and it is the "Church of St. Mary the Virgin" where John Wycliff preached. There is a "kissing gate" but I don't know what that means. It's called "the kissing gate" and encircles this church. There is a memorial of Queen Victoria's diamond jubilee nearby. All these things are from the town of Lutterworth. Also, pretty photos of a "River Swift".

4. High Is The Wall by Ruth Berry, Muhlenberg Press. (to my children, within and without the garden wall). 1955. Pg. 46, "A few days later he brought her diamond. It was much more beautiful than any of her girlfriends had been given. He had bought the best he could afford."

5. A Gown Of Spanish Lace by Janette Oke: her mother's wedding gown--so priceless, but so mysterious..."). Bethany House Publishers out of Minnesota. Pg. 167, "Don't worry, " he drawled, as though reading her mind. It's all paid for. He did not explain how he had come by the money that paid the accounts."

6. The Interpretation of the New Testament 1861-1961 by Stephan Neill. 1964, Oxford University Press. Pg. 184, (Greeks and Christians), "They are no new peole, but the ancient peole of God; since they have entered into a covenant-relationship withgod through faith, they are heirs of Abraham, god's covenant was established on the basis of faith and nothing else. It is sometimes affirmed that the original christians had not supposed themselves to be adherents of a "new" religion; and one of the changes alleged to have been introduced by the Hellenists is that of supposing themselves to be a new race, the third race as opposed to pagans and Jews. But this is an argument which will hardly hold water." (here they are just talking about the early church but it has nothing to do with "race" later, really).

This made me think about the full cup of water I had out for my Dad on the windowsill, and I didn't do any kind of ritual or anything, but it was a wish that he will have good luck and also for me, and my son, separate entirely, to have good luck. To then get a book about a cup running over was sort of interesting. I mainly had this idea of filling a cup to the top with water in a cup that said Dad, which is to represent my own Dad & Mom and family and me and the return of my son to me. I put it on the sill as a symbol of hope and good luck, that the cup may be full or with the idea of "runneth over" in a certain sense. I just found out they have a cold and I guess a lot of people in my family even in Wenatchee came down with something small (cold virus)--so far I haven't had any problem...but I'm sure the first one of the season will be coming up in a few months.

But maybe not. Hopefully, good. The Spanish lace gown is something that made me think of my mother because I think that's the kind of lace on her wedding dress, even though she wasn't spanish or anything. I didn't equate this with anything to do with my life.

I was sort of curious about the kissing gate. I looked up the town of Lutterworth and it's picturesque and has a very cool history about the church there, because supposedly Wycliff translated the very first Bible into English, from the Latin, there. Then, there's a Gideon headquarters which makes me think of Gideon Bibles. I want to find out about the "kissing gate" though.

Yikes. I went to that church site and some look like perfect hooligans. Might delete this last comment... ;)

I thought more about Ganesha as well--this story. I am still working on ideas for a book for my son but I think first I'll just send a simple card so it doesn't take as long to complete and send off.
Today I "touched" on many religions and cultures in this church. The food was all multi-ethnic, from coucous to eastern indian curry to matza to italian to spanish to eastern europe, whey protein, generally american from west coast to new england...and then lots of pears too. and good old american cupcakes. I hope today will be a good day for everyone.
another cat song just came on. The Cure's "cat song. tons of cat songs today. I heard "The Year of the Cat" in the bathroom this morning and then I walked into Safeway as they were playing "Stray Cat Strut" and then now it's another cat song. hahaha.

Anyway, I have to make an exit after this one, to get some work done.
I sent an email to the Lutterworth church, asking about the kissing gate. I said I thought maybe there was some history behind that particular gate, but I don't know what and I couldn't find anything online either. Then I read how Wycliff, that there is a tale that where his ashes fell, on the way to the River Swift, there came new springs. Sort of a nice story. Waiting to hear about the gate still.
I didn't do any wardrobe checks today, on anyone. I didn't pray at least and when guessing without any work, it's more fuzzy. I was sort of "on", sort of not. Right now I feel a bad vibe, which started at about 5:30 p.m., which is the time by which I filed something for an extension of time for a court matter, and maybe something shifted somewhere, I don't know. Things were starting to feel a little bit better for my son.

Also, something must have been better for someone out there because I went from almost no sleep and restless, sad and heavy hearted nights to sleeping like a rock. It was this timeframe where it was just horrible, and so heavy hearted, for a whole month and then worsening and then it improved just a little bit, for maybe a whole week or so, until today. Probably my son is wondering why he didn't see me after his church day.

I want my son back Mr. Barak. I think it is possible to make an Executive Decision now and then. Why not? I want my lawyers to get the records I need, too, and quit stalling, on purpose, by hoping that if I have even a stipulated continuance it will block me, for 2 years, from getting records from Canada about what happened between U.S. and Canadian officials.

This was a solid kidnapping of my child and has been a perversion of justice.

I want my son and I don't care who he is "bonded" to. The bonding argument is irrelevant when the State of Washington deliberately colluded to try to break that bond. It holds up just as well as the Cuban boy situation did, and lets not delay the return of my son until he is 7 or even further bonded to others who are not his rightful parents.

If someone from the U.S. paid attention, and was or is willing to investigate, I am able to point out all the records and evidence that is needed to clear this whole thing up very quickly.

Sunday, September 26, 2010

more on the femur image of obama barak's leg

I guess I thought I would explain, first of all, that it is impossible anyone "sent" me anything about Obama when I asked. No one was communicating with me psychicly or putting ideas in my head. It would have been impossible. So if anyone is claiming to take credit for it, they are stealing that from God.

I also started to wonder why I got so exact but was slightly off, and I thought of 3 things. I first thought it is possible his medical report lists this problem but intentionally makes it the other leg, for security reasons. 2. His other thigh started to act up. 3. I assumed he was facing forward when I really only saw a cut off view of his thigh after seeing a few flashes and then settled on the wrong idea when I was only seeing from his knee to upper thigh.

As for the way I "got" it, it didn't come in word form. I didn't get this impression of the word "femur" or "thigh".

I literally was praying and asking God and then I saw an actual visual (in the mind's eye) of his legs and then it sort of zoomed in on one leg and then went right to this visual of his thigh bone.

After I got this visual of his thigh bone, I then rationalized, to myself, "It must be his femur."

There is absolutely no way that even the world's best psychic could do a little scene, and then zooming in action and then go to this interior view of his thigh bone.

No one sent me a mental picture.

It was God's work and the glory and genius is God.

Had I received an audio impression of "femur" first, it would have been possible someone sent it, and that then my imagination took over. But that is not how it happened.

I did have a few other impressions sort of come up first but then when I got that one, I knew it was something and I raised my head and thanked God and that was it. I got off of my knees and took my shower. It took only a few minutes, but that's not my timing. I don't get very precise things all the time maybe, but I think God still answers prayer. Not all the time, and not in the way we want all the time, but in his time and somehow, his grace.

For a split second I thought, after getting this, was this something about William of Wales? because he had once had a limp (but that was ages ago) but I thought to myself, "no, you prayed to God for something very specific and hidden about Obama and you should go with it and trust that."

I did have a couple of things flash up first, but that was this part where I was doing a mental filter, of sifting out what was my imagination until I felt like I hit on something I wouldn't have thought of myself.

For example, in my human process of thinking, I thought "a knife?" why would I think of that? and then "a catheter?" and no, it was this mental "noise" or human imagination and I felt that wasn't correct at all and was just interference. I was getting some other person that was near, and it was interfering with what I had asked for. I kept praying and waited.

So I waited, having sifted out other information that wasn't about Obama, then all of a sudden, when my inner vision focused on Obama, and then this thigh and then went to the interior, I knew this had to be it. Or hoped that was it, and that it was correct, and I didn't have confirmation until I read the report later.

I have never seen that medical report in my life, or heard of it, and anyone who monitors what I do on my computer would know this. I also wouldn't lie about it and have been honest about these things bc it's important.

So anyway, I wanted to describe better how it came to me, because I know without a doubt that no other psychic sent it to me or influenced the outcome of what I saw, in any way.

I also had "femur" come to mind as a word I used myself, after I had the interior sight of the thigh bone. After I saw this, I then said, after I had quit praying, "his femur" but then I thought, it's the long thigh bone but maybe i should just say thigh bone in case there are other bones involved. I started to doubt and question my vocabulary or medical knowledge because I saw what I saw, but thought I might generalize to just thigh bone.

It was the first time I have ever seen "inside" of someone's body before.
Anyway, I'm going back to eating some ice cream and having some pudding in a minute.

I only asked for this information, out of a request to God to help me again, to show that He is in agreement that my son must be returned to me. I also wanted something that would prove I did not get it from some other psychic and that it was original.

My son was wrongly taken from me and a lot of people have lied and colluded to keep evidence out of the record. I have been deprived of proper counsel and justice and so has my son and I will not quit fighting for him, by whatever legal means necessary.

I just don't know how much more info I should post publicly if I keep praying for things.

Image of A Leg Bone (obama?)

I tried to focus and pray and clear my plate for a few minutes. I asked for something about Obama but I am not sure, it could have been a crossed wire. I wanted something hidden, and for the credit to be to God, but I guess hopefully also benefiting the return of my son to me as well. I can't help but have this wish.

So I prayed and I got a leg bone.

I saw a leg and then saw the bone inside of the leg (in the mind's eye only of course).

I have never heard or seen anything about him that has ever resembled an issue with any bone in the leg, but I sort of saw this from straight on or an almost 3/4 angle and with person facing my direction and it was the leg, from that perspective, on the left, so it would be HIS right leg, whoever this was.

It was a long thigh bone.

Why in the world? I don't know. For all I know, maybe he went through a security scan and it picked up his thigh bone for some reason.

But I don't know what about it. Old injury or new? no idea.

I didn't see it like an x-ray scan. I saw it like first I saw this person's leg and next I was seeing the bone underneath. hahah. Like x-ray vision! But I didn't see anything except for the leg bone, nothing personal like underwear or anything. Really, just that section of bone too.
The other thing that came to mind, for someone who I don't even know and so I'm not sure who it was but he was taller and that's all I got. When I was listening to the radio and the Eminem song "Like The Way You Lie" came on, I saw someone boxing at a boxing bag to this song and then in a ring too, sparing or something with this song. But somehow professional, with gloves and everything. This other thing was completely different and separate, and had nothing to do with the image I go of Obama (Obama-I-think).

I almost want to say tall and dark hair but I don't know for sure. Just got a lot of practice.
I just looked some things up and see that his father lost both legs in a car accident but that isn't it.

It might have been that I was thinking about him and then got something for someone else. It wasn't the stripe on his black pants or anything. The impression was of some kind of bone of some kind.
If I am wrong, I must have gotten it for someone else, however I was specifically praying about Obama and then it's possible I somehow missed the mark in some way. I was trying to filter from my imagination and what was correct and I might have gotten it wrong.

If I'm right, maybe I could have a more private audience next time I have something to share. I don't know, I mean, I'm trying to be helpful.

I thought, since he's playing basketball supposedly, today, maybe he just got bumped or a bruise, but then why would I get a bone instead of that? I guess bones can be bruised too.

I felt a good connection with God and something was right and I don't think he would steer me wrong when I am asking for his help. But I am new at this and might have things to work on.
Then I tried looking up health problems but I am not seeing anything. I see maybe he smokes but nothing else, at all, to go by.

Anyway, I didn't mean it as an attempt to disclose security things, if right. I mean well, even though I wrote I wanted to start looking up personal stuff about Dept. of Justice people if things don't straighten out...I took that post down.

I just ask for protection and freedom for my son and I, esp. my son. But I felt that if this is right, it was given to me, to share because God knows my only forum right now is a public one.

I will keep working on things I guess.

I suppose it is something I'm supposed to work on. I guess I got that answer when I asked God and then said okay then, show me what people are wearing and I was so close. I'm just not super enthused in some ways because it means more than just guessing and doing symbolic rituals. It means being in touch with, and in good standing with God.

Also, disclaimer to say no one but the person themself can know if it's true for them and no one can assume anything bc it is true I could be wrong. So please do not base ideas about things I say, because I'm sometimes right and still sometimes wrong.

One thing that I would like, is an opportunity to quickly move past the problems I'm having with corruption in this case with my son and just live and work in a different state. I cannot get justice or equality here. There are good people, but it seems bad ones have most of the power and control here.
Oh, I don't know if this is a real document, but I just found something! I didn't think the President's medical stuff was put online. I didn't think it was for the public either!

I just found something about a Feb. 28, 2010 medical examination of the President done by the Bethesda, Maryland Naval Hospital.

I am wondering if it's right.?

On THIS one it notes no problems except for femural (thigh bone) pain, stemming from a knee problem. However, on this report, they note the LEFT leg. ?!

I guess, very close but I thought it was his right leg. I wonder if there is either a new problem on the right thigh or if I just got the wrong leg somehow.

If this report is right, I am a little excited by the fact that I got only this and it was hidden from ME at least, even if it was somehow online, I didn't find it until later. Really nice to find though,,to see a kind of confirmation so I don't feel wacky.

Anyway, I will just leave it at that then.

I hope I can find out if it's a different leg too, sometime, or if I just got the wrong side, not being clear enough for some reason.

The way I got it was interesting because I saw just pants and was thinking about something, to get something, and then I got the pants and then it went, my field of interior vision or whatever, went right to actual bone and I got the idea "femur" but I just wanted to go with thigh bone in case there are other bones in the thigh besides the femur.

Thanks for putting up with me while I figure all of this out at least!

I guess that wasn't bad after all. His physician was/is listed as a Jeffrey Kuhlman.

Dreams (harry and other) & song about lucille (updated)

I was mainly thinking about camping and cars and things last night and this morning too, but I had a dream last night involving Prince Harry.

Usually, if I have one about any of them, it's people in the circumference, and strangers, and maybe the Queen or William but last night it was about Harry and it was really weird. I had a lot of little dreams, but the one about Harry I remember because it was the last one I had before I woke up.

It was, I can't remember all the detail, but he thought I was trying to trap him into marrying me. Which is really funny actually.

There was some house and he was there with a friend and I was there too. I think we were talking and hanging out and everything was fine and Harry was interested in me until I said something about the bottoms of my feet.

(I think it was some mixed up Christopher Hitchens/tylosis/flower/Harry/dream)

We were actually getting together or something and then I asked someone to help me take these things off of the bottom of my feet. They were all different colored, and I have no clue what they were supposed to be. They were almost like flowers or gems but they were on the bottoms of my feet and I didn't want them there, and I showed him my feet and then he backed out with his friend, sort of towards the door, and the idea in the dream was that he was worried I was trying to trap him. In the dream, I wasn't trying to trap him at all, I just wanted someone to help me get these things off of my feet, and no strings attached to knowing eachother, but he misunderstood and thought I was showing it to him because I was implying we should be married or something and he thought I was doing it on purpose as some kind of trap. I can't remember if it was viewed as self-promoting (aggrandizing) or an "i need you" kind of move...I don't remember, just that he thought I did it to try to prove or suggest something and he backed off because he thought I had done something with some kind of intentional design. I think in the dream, I didn't even know or recognize what it meant to him or what I had done.

And then he was sort of at the door and it wasn't a goodbye forever, but he was apprehensive about my motives or something, when I showed him this, and then I went out and I was going to different places and some unsavory people following me around.

I had one about Diana first, which I don't remember at all except that I had one, and then about something else, and then after this, the Harry dream and then it sort of morphed into a Harrison Ford kind of movie where I was followed everywhere. And then I woke up.

To me, that dream, because it was half-waking, felt like either a dream where someone was trying to send stuff to me, or just a mixed up dream. It didn't feel like an intuitive dream or like one from God, or just natural and with important meaning. It felt more like a tampered dream or a mixed subconscious one.

And actually, I wasn't thinking about camping or cars last night and this morning at all. But for some time, I haven't been stating exactly what I am thinking, because it is better to keep people guessing. All I know is that a few people have had some lucky guesses with me but a lot of times I think someone is trying to guess and it's really off. Why would anyone even care either, unless they thought I was some kind of threat and literally wanted to do their psychic spying attempts to try to know what I am thinking or know about others? It would seem to me that those spending the most time on it, might be associated with parties who have something to hide or who do think I am some kind of threat in some way. That said, I guess someone thinks I'm a threat in some ways bc for the life of me I cannot pull up photos of the british royal family or putin anymore! they're all in hiding! one thing I noticed which I thought was nice though, was to get a few voluntary confirmations on things that no one in the royal family even had to share and I thought it was really generous. I think they really must psychic themselves and are good natured, in general, about encouraging this in others who aren't harming people with it. At least, it has helped me to believe in myself more, and help show I'm not nuts or "paranoid schitzo". There have been others in the U.S. and other places too, who have done this. I honestly haven't been trying to guess wardrobe stuff at all anymore, not since the couple of days I really prayed about it. I don't know what to do exactly bc it feels exhausting somehow and I don't know if I'm supposed to work at it or what. It sort of freaked me out too, so I just needed a mental break. I've made idle random guesses but not with prayer and focus. Even if I only spent 5-10 minutes on it, and pray, it's somehow draining, slightly.
Then the other thing that happened this morning, which was a little bit psychic, was that I was listening to music and it was songs that were country and folk but story songs and right before one of them came on, I got the name for it. Lucille.

I'll have to find the title but I got the name of the woman that the song was about before it ever came on, but it was the very next one. It was "You Picked A Fine Time To Leave Me Lucille"

Actually, I think I got the name after the song was already playing and maybe it's because I've heard this song before. Kenny Rogers was played at my Mom & Dad's house all the time. It might not have been psychic at all and probably wasn't.

I only listened to this song and Strawberry Wine and then changed it. I listened to all the stations this morning really, kept flipping around and couldn't find one I liked to stay on long enough.
This morning, I wondered if someone is getting scriptures at church about Nehemiah. I don't remember what Nehemiah is about but I felt someone out there was speaking messages or referring to Nehemiah. And I knew it had to do with church, like a message someone was getting in a church. I guess Nehemiah was cup bearer to the king of Persia (now Iran) and rebuilded the walls or temple in Jerusalem, with the king's consent. For some reason, Persia and Israel must have been getting along then.
i am thankful too, that now this laptop isn't overheating anymore. Thank you God.
The other thing I knew I was supposed to look up today, was Octavian's page. The perfume guy. At least it came to mind, and so out of curiosity I did. He is featuring new fragrances by Kenzo called "Once Upon A Time". I haven't looked up his page since the last time I wrote about him, when I found the cats page and the fragrance Love. He writes very nice pieces, in my opinion. This one is about a tragic end where she is transformed to the ocean (so describes the fragrance) and it sort of reminds me of the story of Clytie, who stood at the water's edge, with tears, until she became a sunflower. I think he definitely has a niche with his writing. I think he came to mind after not thinking about him awhile, or his site, because just last night I was talking about some French things.

Tried To Get Copy Of Dark Heart & laptop burning

The first article I read today was about the recall on the book "Operation Dark Heart". I had put in a request for it myself.

I also thought, today, about "dark heart" and what that means, like black heart and thought about the herb "bilberry" and how this used to be referred to as black heart in the past. Just random.

I also read the article about the computer virus that was sent to Iran. I don't really think that was the best idea. For a nation-state to do that, to another country, isn't maybe way to resolve differences.

Like trying to "fry" me and my son hasn't been a good idea either. It only incites people.

But maybe it wasn't a country.. There are many very talented computer experts out there, who crack codes and do all kinds of things.

It might be one thing to go in and attempt to spy or intercept information but another thing to send out a huge virus that disrupts business of any kind. I don't believe most countries would think this is a good idea, as something to do against any other country. In my opinion. But while some people think it's a nation-state, it might not be. Or at least not one which officially sanctioned this.

I have all this hate mail coming at me now and it's all from the same person. So I'm not publishing it. They also keep wanting me to refer to a certain site that has, I guess, more hate stuff about me and as far as I know, this would all be coming from the same person again, or spurred on by them. So anyway, I haven't checked and I'm not going to either. And I am not publishing the hate mail. And, I am pretty sure I know who it's coming from. They were sending hate mail to me at about 2 in the morning even. Anyway, anyway. I publish all kinds of nasty hate mail, but not the same thing over and over. I don't censor any of the mail, no matter how mean it is, unless it's just the same thing. I might change my mind. We'll see.

My laptop has had the burning thing going ever since I turned it on today.

Just now, someone quit, right after I posted that.

Cooking This Morning

This morning I did some cleaning and cooking.

I made split pea soup with ham and potatoes and green salad vanilla pudding and bisquits. I also squeezed grapefruit for fresh juice and then drank it all.

I think the soup turned out well.

I had made a good potatoe salad a day or two ago and no one was eating it so I added it to the split pea and it worked out really well.

First there was just ham so I cut it up, then I found the lentils and added these with water and wanted them to steep with the ham for flavoring the lentils. Then I had no onions or anything so I took the potatoe salad out and added it.

The potatoe salad had potatoes, a lot of chives and scallions, finely cut celery, finely chopped dill pickles and a little pickle juice and real mayo, and then freshly ground pepper.

So it was the perfect seasoning for the lentils and ham.

Then there was a mix for sugar free vanilla pudding and it was one where you just mix the powder with milk, cold and I did it differently to add to the flavor.

I was sort of cooking for someone who is diabetic so I couldn't use eggs milk and sugar and make real custard or pudding, so I used this sugar free powder but first I whisked together 4 egg yolks with milk and then took it to the stove on medium and whisked until it gained consistency. After it had thickened, I added the mix and more milk to cool it down and then beat on high with beaters and poured into cups.

Then while the soup was still simmering, I made bisquits with this mix where you either add only milk or water and I figured water was fine so I stirred this up, kneaded it out, and then after flouring so it was kneadable, I oiled a pan and then coated the surface of the lump of dough with oil and tore off into bisquit size.

I squeezed 3 ruby grapefruits and just drank the juice myself.

Oh, and I made a salad too. Just a regular green salad with tomatoe cut into it and a couple of radishes on the side.

I figured, soup/salad and bisquits and then vanilla custard-pudding.

Also, a trick to keeping bisquits warm, I've found, instead of using the oven, is to place them on a metal tray and then place this over the pot of soup if it's on lowest level and while the soup simmers the bisquits stay warm. I think bisquits are probably best when they are 10 minutes out of the oven though, right after they've cooled down enough to handle and cut.

Reminded of Cat Frat

I was reading the BBC science articles and it reminded me of how I have thought about reporting more on cat behavior but I guess there are already articles out there. Maybe I should write one for a Cat magazine though. What has been interesting to me, is that in very short periods of time with the cats, I've picked up on things before that I never noticed when I was usually around only 1 or 2 cats.

They are smarter than I thought and more socially connected than I thought. The mother knows her grown kittens and still licks them and defends them over the other others. They also know who their Dad is. And I thought male cats just left and didn't care, but it's not true.

The group behavior of all these cats has been interesting and helped me to understand them better, in groups. I feel like Jane Goodall sometimes (just a tiny bit, for a brief moment). But I might write a good article and submit it.

The Man In Charge Of BBC Science Articles

The guy responsible for the science articles for the BBC has a political agenda and a fine sense of humor.

I never thought that science could be so amusing. One minute I'm reading about endangered freshwater turtles that are dying and then it's the sad plight of "nuisance" pests that encroach on british terrain, like the "ruddyduck" with the turquoise bill featured prominently, and then it's about "long haul birds" and how the "warming" factors will affect where they go. How they might need to go south rather than north.

Seriously, it reads like an "ours"-"theirs" line and is so tongue-in-cheek I'm sure no one who is authentically british would think I could pick up on any of it. Since I'm "American" I must not grasp the subtleties of sarcasm.

All of the other sections mind their ps and qs but not the BBC science section.

I will have to discover who is writing these articles. And then consider who would be most interested in reading them, and get the most out of the satire. I am quite sure "long haul birds" are the most fascinating and relevant topic in the science world at present. That one is by Mark Kinver. Will have to go back and find out who wrote the other ones and who the editor is.

This is when I have to say "Go U.S.A." and wonder what in the world has been going on, because why would I have a lot of problems from UK and Canadian direction? Maybe because I'm not a team player or a hooker? Not "pretty woman" enough so I need to have people imported from the other side to join in on screwing me over? no, it's not even UK at ALL. It is just a very few select who, for some reason, feel I am a threat of some kind or was a threat of some kind. It's not that many, they just have loud voices and money.

Anyway, what I have to say on cat behavior, is far more interesting than Kinver's article.

I can't find any bio on Mark Kinver. I will continue to look. It might be more interesting to make guesses about him. But I'll try if I can't find anything else first.

I write this and then go back and get an ad about making "the retirement cornerstone part of your retirement plan".

Anyway. I think it's more of someone's editorial decision and the way someone chooses to write the titles. I cannot find anything about the man. Just his articles.

Saturday, September 25, 2010

This Evening

I felt some things were okay but there are some things happening which are not good. And right now, the overheating is bad, and it has to be someone in close proximity.

I sat down by the river for awhile and then this man invited me to a hockey game. I said okay and then declined because I started thinking of this international conference where the man was holding up a puck to demonstrate uranium.

Someone just deleted this whole thing. I had written more.

So I went to some different places first, looking up someone about Ganesha, out of curiosity. I then decided to peek in at the game out of curiosity, but heard a movie playing in the park and went that way, thinking, since it was a cartoon, that it was harmless and a nice way to think of my son. So I sat down and the character in the movie started singing, "Sunshine, lollipops and rainbows!" and this whole song over and over. I felt good energy from kids but not all of the parents. I knew when I was there, just again, full confirmation to me from God that my son is to be with me. I got up and thought I would peek in at the game real quick so I did and it was very strange. Shock. I don't know why people were shocked. But absolute shock and some friendly faces and some very mean.

At first everything was fine and on one side I felt a little better maybe but then I started to feel a down vibe, just a little bit and I left because I couldn't find the person and picked a flower that was near the ground and gave it to the woman I'd talked to about Ganesh. I just picked the first one that was by me and that was all. I had talked to her about removing obstacles first and then the next thing I heard was the "sunshine, lolipops and rainbows" song and I felt a little tension so was hoping it was going to be okay soon and not like a happy song in a horror theme park.

It seemed okay, the vibe, but I was trying to accomodate others too.

This woman I sat next to at the kids park had her kid fall in front of me and then said, "look out Ivan." When I showed up she took out a crock pot from some shelter and brought it back and then I was sitting there and just wondering how things were going down.

Then I checked on my family and called everyone and wanted to make sure everyone was okay.

I later looked up the second part to "brushka...which was something like netanuva" but I don't know exactly what. I found out, on another "rainbow" page of for baby names, that "Anuva" is russian for "a new beginning". But I am not sure how that would really go together.

Then I was walking back home and someone had intentionally killed a cat and had it lying on the side of the sidewalk but I didn't stop or anything. It was a siamese cat and maybe someone's pet, I don't know. It didn't look hit at all, it looked more like it was poisoned or died for some other reason. I thought about calling it in to animal patrol but wondered if someone just wanted a big reaction and a lot of people were looking so I just walked on.

I don't like weekends here. There is too much violence and fighting.

(I am really sorry to hear about the news from the shooting in L.A.--not good. Just checking news now.)

This laptop is still doing serious overheating.

"Chariots of Fire" came on overhead and must be some kind of Safeway joke. The one before was "Shot to the Heart".

I saw a nice man in the music store today. That was good. Everyone there was decent but this one man I really liked.

I thought about my brother and want him to be doing really well.

I have someone writing in a lot of hate mail just repeating the same thing and it's the same person so I'm not publishing it. Said my brother was in Miami or lived there, which isn't true, and a lot of other things.

I had better go.

I bought more apple cider vinegar today and I am telling you, that stuff WORKS. I am not kidding. It really, really, works.

I took a couple of swigs straight from the bottle, without diluting and it immediately goes to your head, starts up the circulation, and gets blood and other kinds of things going. I am not kidding. Women will notice it.

If you are not busy and doing other things, try taking a couple of swigs of this stuff and then notice for yourselves what it does.

It's also very good for the female cycle and other horomone related things and armies used to drink this stuff regularly, for strength.

Named A Few Cats & "Brushka?"

I decided to give temporary names at least, to some of the cats.

There are these 2 black kittens and they are Ipse and Bipse.

Then there is Beverly, who won't leave my side since I helped her in kitten-birth, and she already had that name. It sort of cracks me up bc Beverly is Granny's name and there is this cat that was named Beverly and she loves me the most.

Then this orange cat has a very long and fluffy tail and fluffs it around a lot and I don't know if it's a male or female but I named her "Delilah".

Then there is a striped kind of tabby and I don't know what to name it. Maybe Steve. "Coon" came to mind for racoon but I think it might sound racial so I can't name it that.

Then this partial grey cat came in and I thought it should be Vladdie P. because it has the same shade of grey as Vladimir P's hair in some places and the other more solid grey one I want to say Vladdie D. because it reminds me of talking about McDonald's Vladimir. The only thing is, I think Vladdie D. is pregnant. So I think I might scratch those names and just come up with something else entirely.

Delilah is perfect for the fluffy orange cat. Even if it's a male, it's a Delilah.

Lots of russian talking now. something like brushka netanuva something something. Came to mind. Not sure about the second part exactly, but I definitely got brushka. and then I went online and in online slang it means a male dog just wanting to get a female pregnant. But it's also a personal russian name, however, I don't know what it means.

Strangely, I have gotten a lot of East Indian words in my mind before too and looked them up and found it really means stuff.

Strange to get brushka when I was just talking about the pregnant cat.

I think I need a small walk to get some oxygen to my brain.

353 YVZ washington plates: "Nosy" & spitter

I don't know who she is but first she passed me one way and then the other way and before she even passed me the second time, I had written down her plate numbers with the mental note: "Nosy".

Which is sort of funny because after I designated her as "nosy" she passed by again and was checking me out.

She was in a black Landrover SUV.

I also had the sense that she is connected to some government stuff.

I didn't have a bad or good feeling, one way or the other. Just nosy, and maybe govt. connections, and something about "pencil you in, and pencil you out."

That she is the type of person to "pencil you in" rather than use a permanent pen.
Then, I walked past the skateboard shop where the guy there has been "iffy" and had weird stuff with a bike helmet and blood and "Arizona" in his bathroom wastebasket (right after my friend from Arizona told me his daughter had had an injury) and he specifically waited for me, then opened the door and loudly hocked up a huge spit wad and spit on the ground as I walked by and then called me a "dike".

I think this is the defense of ugly men, to call women "dikes", in a town where it's not normal if you don't get married at age 20 and start popping out kids. I think he's tied to his mother's apron strings still. Tell me if I'm right. Not only that, he's getting tips from Theodore Keyes, who should be in jail rather than out and about causing problems.

Iranian President's Speech at 2010 NYC UN

I didn't think it was as bad as all the reports made it out to be. In fact, I am wondering if I didn't see the right clips so I still want to find the whole thing.

For how coarsely his speech was criticized, I was trying to find the unforgiveable part.

Watching the footage made me sad, to see people walking out and all of this conflict in the room. On the expressions on faces, you could see it. That was, I think, some of weight, in seeing discordance under the surface. I felt sad to see the U.S. being attacked but I also felt sad to see all of the various tensions. It wasn't quite as bad as I imagined it was supposed to be. I thought it was going to be this hugely bigoted and spewing speech, judging by the criticism but then I watched just small clips and he did mention something about the "zionist regime" or something, but it wasn't that bad. The thing is, it is true that the U.S. and Israel have strong ties and with intelligence as well. It may be a stretch to say regime, but it's not unfair to say Israel sometimes influences policy decisions. Other countries do as well. I think the part about his belief about there being no Holocaust is wrong, and supposedly even the Pope once ? said he didn't believe it happened. That's wrong, because it did happen, and denial is an excuse. There are other genoicides as well, though, that don't get as much attention. Horrible things have been done to so many different groups of people.

I also thought Obama's speech was somewhat emotional. He didn't show emotion, but it was under the surface as well. I don't mean emotional in a bad way, but that there was a sensitivity under the surface which he tried to conceal and did a good job of, but I still sensed it.

At this, I put all of my criticism back to draft instead of published, because I feel for the U.S., and those who may be good in the U.S. and are trying to reverse a bad tide of corruption.

However, for the last few days, in various locations, I have had tampering with my laptop again, with overheating and this kind of thing, and a lot of really odd mind games being played, and I would like to have my son back and someone get to the root of what is going on.

Which is why, for me, when it seems the U.S. is refusing to help, I wonder why and turn to look at government archrivals to see if there is better peace there, because there is so much leveraged against me and my son.

I feel that my son and I are not "safe" in many "camps", however, I know that I am the type of person where I am fair and try to give different people equality no matter what group they are from. I personally have no agenda against any group, but some groups HAVE, against me and my son, and I have realized I have to be prudent and discover which groups these are and avoid them. Because while they can trust me, I cannot trust them worth a stone's throw.

I find myself having to figure out who does NOT have a conflict of interest or want to harm me and my son, and how to align myself with those who seek our good or at least are neutral and don't wish us any harm. Who have no cultural, religious, legal or other kinds of obstacles which would put them in opposition to me. Or reason to be jealous or other motive to use me or my son. I have had people try to destroy me and my son and the gifts God gave me and my son. Some of these gifts have been destroyed. My voice, for one.

This is unforgiveable. These are God-given gifts that God gave for his glory, not for destruction out of jealousy and I know that there is going to be a serious vengeange of the Lord on those who have attempted or succeeded to take any of these blessings from me or my son.

No one should try to steal or destroy beautiful things that God gives to others. Not even beautiful monuments and buildings, in countries that have enmity are typically destroyed. Usually, most have an appreciation for art and the work and what God blesses others with. But those who have gone after me and my son to steal what God has had planned, or to destroy the gifts that no man or woman or child and only God alone gave us, will themselves be destroyed.
It is one thing to try to steal belongings that one human gives to another. But when you steal gifts that God gives, you are treading on seriously dangerous territory and you will be tried and discovered and held accountable.

God gives gifts to people in all countries, of all races and religions and cultures.

It is evil to try to destroy a gift of God for spite, revenge, or jealousy. It doesn't matter who you are, you do not have God's permission. When God takes away a gift, it is without human intervention. It is God's doing, and he can do as he wants, whenever he wants, and doesn't need a group of people to do it for him. That curse to 2 generations that I asked God for, out of his mercy, to those who have harmed me and my son, will not be revoked. God will have mercy on whom he has mercy.

Stealing my material things is nothing compared to stealing my son, which was and is a gift of God to me, and stealing my God-given talents and trying to destroy them.

God given gifts are health, life, talents (whether it's sense of humor, musical or academic ability, or any special ability), liberty, free will, intellect, looks, and children. They are gifts God gives at the moment of conception. Those who decided to fuck with me and my son on those levels, have God as their Judge.

Human given gifts, are material things, and work, and housing--all of which are important, but which are given by the allowance of society which controls these things, with or without God's help.

There was no justification for what was done to me and my son and what still continues from time to time. The only motive for someone to tamper with my voice was jealousy and an attempt to take something from me that, for some reason, some group felt was an attractive quality and therefore a threat to their own agenda or something they thought they could ruin out of revenge from hatred. It was almost as if someone heard some prophesy that someone powerful was going to fall for a woman with a beautiful voice and they went out and tried to destroy this in particular. It is like something out of a sick novel. And then to continue harming me and my son to make me sound nuts when there are criminals who are getting away with very serious crimes.

My son and his gifts, were also God-given and he was and is a gift to me, from God. It is not the right of anyone to take this natural gift from me.

There are good people in every group, and every country and I feel that I must have secret friends in every group. But there are some things to be avoided.

I respect the fact that, while I care about my own country, how some countries wish to be absolutely autonomous, like Iran. In a way, it's remarkable that there are no diplomatic ties, and in a world where everyone is extraditing others to do favors for big shots, no matter who or where they are, and whether the reason is political or not, it cannot be a bad thing to have a few countries that try to hold up their own fort.

Of course I don't want war, nor do I think there should be, and it would be horrible to make things even worse than they are for everyone. However, what Iran did in freeing the hostage was a generous concession and where there are horrible things happening to U.S. citizens in the U.S., I would think the U.S. needs to put a cinch on what is going on domestically rather than focus on 2 hostages in Iran. There are a lot MORE hostages, and some of them are children, in the U.S., and the U.S. should be focusing on domestic stability as well as peaceful relations.

It is like the bullies in the U.S. have taken over and they need to be rooted out, no matter who they are and what kind of money they have.

I would like to know why the Seattle FBI personnel tried to BLOCK me from reporting my receipt of a poisonous cigarette and then having someone use technology to attack my fucking voice. These kinds of people should not be allowed to be free. Those who assaulted me and my son, in our home, through technology, in East Wenatchee, must be held accountable.

I prayed for blessings again, to those who protect my son and root out those who harm him or coerce him to do things against his natural free will. Blessing means "joy" and it is not always in a form of material reward but a sense of joy or peace where there is no reason for it. And this I pray, among other things, for those who defend us.

Thank you.

Actually...update...I take it back about just leaving the other hostages. I don't mean that exactly. If they are innocent, they should be freed. Anyone who is innocent should not be held hostage. I just find the focus to be strange when there are very bad things happening to people and people dying in whole groups even, to defend a couple of people whom they know are innocent and who have been tortured, by every definition of the word.

Also, it is not all of the people from the FBI. The main persons who were hounding me and following me around when I was in Seattle/Bainbridge, and who were the main persons to try to obstruct justice, were Catholic. To date, every single person who has deliberately had a problem with me and stepped in the way of my making a report to them, was Catholic, and I don't say this to down everyone (all Catholics), because there are very good people, but for some reason, these are the ones who didn't want me to have any reports made. During that time, I kept having "Chris" brought up a lot as well. Tons of references made about "Chris". I've only known 2: a Chris who was the girlfriend I had who leaked info about me, in Oregon, and then the Chris I worked with. Maybe another one but can't think right off. Oh, Chris Rozollo who was more local and had moved to Seattle by that time. Having a large number of people in an organization, who are from the same religion and have possible ties, makes it difficult to get anywhere by way of normal justice.

And I only say this, having even recently met some really good Catholic people, who have even expressed their faith with symbols and things and I've said it's nice to see, as it highlights the nicer people I've met who are not afraid to demonstrate their faith either. There is some group(s) that's out for me though.