Wednesday, March 31, 2010

Lebanese Man Accused Of Sorcery

I read this because of people recently (joking or not) calling me a witch. I'm not. I don't even practice the traditional "fortune teller" stuff at all.

I hope he'll be pardoned, because I hope the Saudis or whoever will realize there is a very real "gift" or different "gifts" that people can have, no matter what their beliefs and honestly, well, in christian theology, if God can use a donkey to speak to people, he can use anyone and anything. I also think it's part of the human psyche, that we really have a lot more to tap into and usually it's by letting go and allowing oneself to be wrong, we can get to this. The remote viewers say it can be practiced and greater skill acheived.

Some push the gifts away, and others try to practice it only in private. To do it right though, you need to get feedback and try to verify it, whenever possible. And to do this, I now understand where it's acceptable to be paid for your time. Not that you would charge someone if it just comes automatic and you know you have to say something.

Anyway. I guess I will show off my spam from shell station. The visitation monitor already made notes of the car I gave my son.

Aunt & Uncle's Phone Off The Hook

I am concerned about my son because I think he is rewarded or punished after his visits with me. I have seen him look very afraid to leave me to go with Pablo, looking back at me, scared and desperate. Pablo is either to blame for something or he has allowed things to happen to my son and done nothing about it. I hate to say it, but I saw my son's response.

On the other hand, bad things happen with them and my son in general, which I think they do not want to happen.

Homeless Break

I actually enjoyed this one homeless guy, I found him personable but after getting this migraine out of nowhere, again, and then having people in the town seeming to know it was coming...I had to say no tonight.

I just needed a night to see how things are without him here, even though he brought some really nice things for me. I had to ask him why he thought of giving me gum the night before. The night before I got a migraine when my last migraine, I had to chew gum because my ears were also popping.

He was walking next to me for a short time and I started feeling the migraine return. That's after it was gone pretty much, and I think all that Advil did the trick.

He was in the Army for 14 years and also said he knew street people and law enforcement too. It sounded like he had problems but also defenders, from all sides. I thought he was fun to talk to, but I just had to say wait and at least give it a night or so. If he'd stayed and it had anything to do with him, it would have been harder to figure out because it would appear to be a rebounder. So I have to see if I am free of migraine first and then I would be willing to risk my health if something should happen because it would be more out of the ordinary and easier to spot as such.

I thought it strange today that when I was being kicked out of the WVC, Dr. Gotthold and the chef came out. The chef! WHY? Why the chef? I had given this elderly man my cup of caffeinated coffee when I noticed the canister was empty and told him I would take decaf and he could have my cup. So he said thanks and then later the decaf was gone so I went to the cafe and they said they'd make me a complimentary americano. I wasn't paying really close attention but I thought things were fine. The Chef kept saying "thank you" like for something serious but I thought he had just noticed or heard that I was polite with the elderly man. I had taken one sip and then for some reason, I waited and saved it until I threw it out in a bathroom.

So were they trying to make it look like it might have had something to do with that coffee? or was there something wrong with it afterall? because I know with one sip, it couldn't have done much. It was one or two sips most. I drank that much maybe 24 hours before I got the migraine but when the Army guy was here, he brought me bubblegum and when I woke in the morning with migraine, and he was up all night on his computer, I didn't assume anything but I wondered.

And then it was very clear that people expected me to have to be going to the ER for migraine that day.

I guess what made me decide to take a night off from housing homeless was the fact that my migraine had been mild but I caught it and then it was gone. It didn't come back until the Army guy was there. I thought this was very weird. It just returns when he's around? It was almost instant. He had candles and bath supplies and toiletries for me and I just said, "So why did you decide to give me bubblegum?" and he said he didn't know. I said, "Well, I'm going to have to say no for tonight." After I was away, I had no more migraine. It's remotely possible that someone nearby could do something (?) with technology from a distance to trigger one, but I just had to wait on it.

Also, I had wondered, because...well, I saw some people looking in the window on the day I first sat down with him and I could point one of the guys out if he's still in town. Tall, very dark hair, thin, narrow face, and distinctive features (won't go into detail). I wondered why that particular man should look happy or excited to see where I was sitting.

Anyway, this homeless former Army guy gave me gum and then a can of SPAM, the day before I got migraine.

Harassment By Doctor and Star of David Nurse & More Evidence Against Justin Titus

They all harass me.

But now, I went back to the clinic, reporting my migraine pain had gone down, but I was there for anxiety more than anything.

Dr. Fiedler refused to treat me. Then, this nurse who removed her name tag but was wearing a silver Star of David pendant was REALLY nasty to me. She told me to sign this form and then yanked the pen out of my hand so fast and with such a viciousness, it broke (the pen).

I only noticed the Star of David pendant after she did this and it was hidden beneath her smock. I said I liked I liked it and she just sneered at me and ripped the form out of my hands. I say Star of David only because I'm reluctant to assume she's Jewish just because she's wearing a necklace, just like you can't assume someone is Christian (or acts like it) if they're wearing a cross. But she had very short curly hair, round face and sort of more pug nose and was shorter than me.

Next to where Dr. Fiedler wrote "migraine headache" I was trying to write "anxiety" because this is what he refused to treat. I told him I had anxiety from the treatment by clinics today (naturally) and he didn't want to acknowledge this.

I specifically told him the main issue at this point was anxiety. He wanted me to do a urine test again, before doing any preventative treatment for the return of my migraine. I told him I wasn't doing a pregnancy test when I wrote on the medical form I wasn't pregnant and that is what they should go by.

He said I'd written it on my blog so they were going by that. I said this is not an accurate form of documentation to go by legally.

He said he was going to go by this. When I told him anxiety treatment wasn't contraindicated, he said he refused to treat me for anxiety.

I said "Oh? What's your angle for that?" and he said, "You don't have distress or anxiety. You have a personality disorder and are emotionally unstable and your BLOG shows this."

(the same blog he and his nurses want to use for any evidence about anything in my life at all, without verifying anything)

I think they wanted to find a way not to treat my migraine, which was bad this morning, or looked like it would be heading into a bad one. They wanted to keep me from filing anything in court which would prove a lot of people liars. They don't want me to have access to the records, or to have a public defender or a way to defend my case.

I think they also wanted to claim if my migraine was so bad, how could I function today? when I have migraines of varying degrees and at different stages? The migraine I had the day of hearing, I could not function. I went home and went to bed. The migraine I had this morning, interrupted what I was doing, but it wasn't that bad and I told the nurses and doctors this, but I wanted to have it treated before it DID become an issue. After taking 5 advil all at once, it was a little better and maybe because I caught it in time, which I've been able to do in the past with migraine. If I take Advil early, I can sometimes get rid of one, but I didn't have any Advil at my house. So I took some from someone who gave me a bunch as I was leaving the Central Washington Clinic.

All that these people are doing, is trying to block me from access to court, smear my name, and then try to claim or deny they are intentionally TRYING to inflict emotional distress.

Also, I found out today that someone entered a brand new document into the Wenatchee Valley Clinic system, newly scanned something in that wasn't there before. For Justin Titus, and where usually the person who scanned it, will stamp it with their name, there was no such stamp.

This document WAS a release form, which I signed when I retained Justin, and yet he CLAIMED, to me, that he didn't have such a release and had no way of getting my records. It never showed up until a few days ago.

Regardless, I have email from him where he contradicts everything. He pretty much contradicts himself and the record as well.

More Harassment & Problems

I just had this guy whom I've talked to before, and who remembered my name, pull up next to me and ask me if he could take me somewhere. I was walking back to the clinic, because I still have migraine and wanted to see if I'm refused a second time, for treatment, and because I need to be treated. Not only do I have a migraine--at this point I have anxiety and I feel my distress was intentionally provoked and caused by what happened today.

It's not very bad right now bc it wasn't bad to begin with, the first day, and after being denied treatment I took 5 advil to hold it off until I could get normal treatment and figure out what to do.

So this guy, Bryan, I recognized him so I was allowing him to take me to the clinic. He took me here and the security guard who is always rude to me, Ben, they knew eachother. They were very friendly with eachother and Ben admitted this. What was weird, was that after I was checked in, and when Bryan said he would go to the appt. with me to make sure I wasn't harassed and that I had a witness present, he just took off with the security guard.

When the security guard came back, he looked at ME and then went into the back ER room. I wondered what happened to Bryan and the guy was walking back to his car.

THEN I approached Ben and these guys both had this planned out. I mean Ben acted like he didn't know him and I said, "You two knew eachother" and he said yes and then he said they didn't me. That's when I knew this was bs. They both knew me and knew who I was, and why would they claim differently. Ben said to me, "You're seeing things." For whatever reason.

I went outside and this nice black and white Hummer is being followed by an older blue pick-up truck. What I'm trying to figure out, is why they are so interested in having me involved with them at all.

I believe the whole point was to pick me up and then claim they didn't know me and make it sound like I was some strange lady they didn't know who asked for a ride (when I didn't and they DO know who I am). I swear to God, the whole purpose was to attempt to construct some kind of dirt about me because this town knows they have nothing on me and they need to fabricate and create things instead.

I am positive the point was to slander me and make me look bad and then have something written into some kind of chartnotes.

I regret ever taking a ride from him. He was known, and I saw him at the cafe all the time, and other places as well.

My migraine is only at a 3 or so right now but it will be worse tomorrow. I was shuttled between these two clinics, for hours, as they wasted my time refusing me treatment.

I was crying and distressed after the last place, CWH, told me they would not treat my migraine unless I peed into a cup for pregnancy test. I have never been told I have to be tested for pregnancy before treatment for migraine.

No one has ever done this before. No one has refused migraine treatment before until today, the day they all knew I was trying to file documents for court. No one has ever told me I have to test for pregnancy before migraine either. I wasn't able to get anything done today with filing things and I was prevented by Dr. Gotthold from getting more of my medical records. I was insulted and harassed repeatedly.

At least I wasn't very bad off with this one, and it was milder than usual. It was very minor but I knew if I didn't treat it now, it would get worse. So I was just trying to have it treated and then proceed with the legal stuff.

If anything, now I feel I have more anxiety than anything else. After all of that.

I didn't have a total deadline of getting it done today, but they thought so. And this is what happens to me on a day when they think I need to get things done. They coordinated their efforts to refuse treatment, harass me, and try to make it look like there was something wrong with me. They also started insinuating I didn't need the Vicodin for pain (it's hardly any at all) which would only be something someone would do if they were friends with Michelle Erickson or wanted to support her coworkers in slandering me.

Harassment At Medical Clinics Today (NOW)

I went to the Wenatchee Valley Clinic and was refused treatment by Mr. Mark Shipman after he harassed me and tried to provoke me first. The medical director, Dr. Freed, is on vacation, and in his absence some decided to take liberties. I was fully refused treatment for migraine today. Then he lied and said I was just asking for narcotics when that wasn't true and has never been true. Mr. Shipman is usually a Central Washington Hospital employee and the Director in charge today was this same Dr. Bill Gotthold that I had a problem with last time.

Then I was followed to Central Washington Hospital by this woman who had some saint and cross thing in her car, and she didn't have any injury and just followed me and then lied and said she did to a nurse here, Joanna, who then took my vitals and then she refused to take my blood pressure. She was telling me it had to be done on my right arm and I said this arm hurt and could she do the other arm. She refused.

As soon as I blogged this, THEN people acted professionally. I shouldn't have to do this while I'm in pain, BLOG, but if I don't, I will be harassed and refused treatment and the migraine will be worse tonight and tomorrow.

I believe some of these people know I had things to continue to file in court and just wanted to delay my filing and harass me.

It's the start of a migraine but if it's not treated, it will be worse later. It's not full blown but it's just on one side of my head. So I will probably downgrade the pain level I gave, but I just gave a high number to get treated after being refused treatment.

So they are very coordinated here. Mr. Shipman and Dr. Gotthold refused to treat me and knew I'd have to go to CWH, where I was told to sit in front of "Carol", and all the women except Carol, are wearing purple and turquoise, which so happens to be the color of the 2 cupcakes my son brought to his visit today.

At Wenatchee Valley, I was harassed by people wearing turquoise or black, white, and red at the front desk but others wore blue or green, or just looked normal. I was approached by 3 people who stood over me before I was ever admitted. They refused to give their names.

It was this huge staged day of threats, death threats, and references to the english royal family and Kate Middleton and they got the Kate thing all wrong. I don't need to elaborate.

I will write more later but for now, I'm only blogging enough to protect myself, which I should have continued to do at the WVC or I wouldn't have had the problem I did and he wouldn't have gotten away with it.

I stupidly turned the computer off, and allowed Shipman to tell me he refused to treat me and that my migraine isn't "life threatening" (the lawyers have already been through this with them, about discrmiination and refusal to treat someone in a place of public accomodation). If I'd had my laptop out and blogged when this was happening, he wouldn't have gotten so far, and I could also document I am thinking clearly. He started harassing me saying "You have issues" and went on and on, yelling at me. Then he tried to say he DIDN'T refuse to treat me and tried to claim I just wanted Fioricet when I told him what worked for me in the past and it's on the record.

As soon as I posted was "Joanna", who is wearing some green smock with red ladybugs on it...as soon as I posted about her, suddenly, they were calling me back to a room and she quit doing her "paperwork" about me which she claimed she had to do when she was refusing to even take my blood pressure. She said to the head nurse, "I tried to take it" and shrugged and the head nurse turned away. So that's when I blogged and posted this.

Joanna was telling me I had to give her my right arm, not my left arm. Then she was demanding I take my shirt off to do it when it was a loose top and there is no reason she couldn't use my left arm.

They put me in a room at CWH with a clock that's military time when it's not usually set for military time. It is now 14:46.

They have someone next door to me who is not injured and who is screaming, "Please help me! Please, please, please, please," over and over and over and not one doctor or nurse is going in. She's in rm 11 and I'm in room 10. She is screaming at the top of her lungs and it doesn't even sound real. Seriously. It sounds like very bad acting. It's not even real crying. I'm not being mean, I'm totally serious.

Oh, what a surprise. She stopped! The acting lessons aren't paying off. As soon as I posted this bit about her drama which wasn't even real, she quit. I guess anyone could check and find out what she is supposedly here for. She's here next door to me at the same time I'm here. I'm sure it's something absolutely devastating!

Oh, now she has a cold. Cough, cough.

Harassed By CPS State Workers & Other Harassment

I was harassed today by Michelle Erickson, which is no surprise, since I filed something for court yesterday and she knows. She not only refused to leave, she refused to let me see my son as she stood there for over 10 minutes, harassing me. She did this after I specifically told her I did not want to talk to her and if she needed to wait to speak to a lawyer.

I woke up this morning with a migraine again, and this isn't normal that I've had this many this month, and I think it is either the fact that I've been eating food which was given to me, or? I think it is the food or some other trigger because it's not stress, because I've had stress before that is much worse and it doesn't cause increased migraines. SO I think it's that I either ate at this homeless shelter place a couple times, where I was offering free room and board to someone, or it is from other food I received and just the alteration in diet has made a difference.

What I find strange, is that it is clear people knew I had migraine today and that they expected this. Why would anyone expect me to come in, on a day when I said I had all this filing to do, unless someone knew I was given something which would trigger migraine?

It's at the start of the migraine but getting worse and I'll write more after I've been treated.

Vibe This Morning

The vibe totally changed. I woke up this morning and that heaviness or bad feeling was gone.

I don't know if it was my son or some kind of world event going on or what. Anyway. For now at least, it's fine.

The first song I played this morning was "Mama" by Tupac. Just playing it over and over.

I love the intro to this song in the video. If she hadn't been acquited, he never would have become, maybe, what he became. His future could have been permanently altered. Maybe he still would have gotten into music, but who knows. Who raises you is really important.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Tq6L2_Ey0dU Then I found this. I was looking for bossa nova but this looked interesting. It's "No Woman No Cry/Nao Chore Mais" Bob Marley's song covered by Gilberto Gil. The guitar! Just those opening notes...and I don't know where they are but the sound is good!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DMd8dntfgAg Yellow Submarine. I don't know why.

One of my favorite christian songs, by Rich Mullins: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BaNwTYJrYtA. "Calling Out Your Name". I used to dance to this one all the time. I also like this one, "Creed", but I just realized how similiar they are. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5Tpq4MoRVV4&feature=related

"We'll Smoke The Blighter Out!": http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7UOjuiE_-Yo
The next one I found was in German so what the hell, here it is: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ePNnyD3BcxE&NR=1
In Dutch? Every version I click on is in a different language: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=v2hdbIwNk04&NR=1
Swedish. I didn't search for it, it was just Swedish next: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CXDAwQbtziQ&NR=1

I laughed when I saw this clip because I just recently burned my thumb while using a lighter. I had to use ice and got a blister. It was the dumbest thing because I didn't even notice for a split second, that I was burning myself because I had my mind on other things. I just hope I don't see my son with a burn mark today bc it seems like there's been this matching thing.

Polish:http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=g2gHAlS9uyk&feature=related

I clicked on a caterpillar song and got Polish again:http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Lz9CBHo5L8E&feature=related.

Tuesday, March 30, 2010

Something Very Wrong Tonight & Today

Something has been very wrong all day. It improved when I blogged about having a bad energy and feeling something was wrong.

So it got better, like something improved somehow, for a short time and then it was very bad again.

This morning, bad. This mid-morning to maybe 1 or so, it was good. Then it went bad again.

I think someone is doing something to my son or someone is doing something that makes my son very sad, or he's having problems with this non lethal weapon stuff. It was happening to me today and it wasn't like it was a secret either.

I think, what makes most sense was that it was from my laptop bc it happened at a cafe and then there were all these trucks driving by with "electric" stuff again, a lot of them. And this woman pulled up in a truck with flames on the side, a different vehicle, and left it parked outside by me.

Something else might be going on.

I know there is a lot of bad going on in the town lately. I am being harassed a lot more too, and today some of the people were pretending to come at me and then laughing, or pretending they were concealing weapons. There were other things, a lot of threats basically, and then the problems with the computer, and no one doing a thing about fixing it, is how this felt. It is like the good people left town, not that no one good is here, but if anyone was on good behavior, not anymore.

I also consider that someone I love besides my son is being affected. Or that someone died and others are grieving. Or maybe something big in the world occured, and it isn't very good.

Harassment By Hagopian Firm (who called police)

I just experienced another totally unnecessary situation by some Wenatchee people.

Since my totally unethical lawyer and his firm screwed me over, they did this when they knew I wouldn't be able to appeal or defend myself.

So I tried to compose a motion for reconsideration and special set hearing, by a certain deadline. I asked a law firm if they would be willing to print and fax something for me since I didn't have means to do this. Leeza or whatever her name is, with Hagopian firm said she would. I had to explain things to her but then she said okay. So I had to draft it before it could be sent to her to print (only 2 pages) and faxed.

I told her I had to get it out by 5 tonight and she said no problem.

I drafted it up and after I sent the first part, my computer shut down. Ran out of batteries but a little bit earlier than it said it would. So then I went to this one office and they were very nice. I should always mention the nice places, and people, but I'm too worried they'll be penalized in some way, but helping me at all, sincerely. So I tend not to.

They allowed me to finish drafting the motion I needed to write. I sent it out from their server and to myself as well, and when I checked my inbox it never showed up. Then, I tried to send it from my own account and it went through but after a delay first.

However, when I called her, to say I had sent them over, she tried to say they weren't going to do it, and this was at the very last minute. Why would they do that? She kept trying to argue not to do it for me, at all, and I couldn't understand why other than to screw me over at the last minute. So she was still about to say no and then asked if I was at another business. I said yes and she said, "In this building?" and I said yes and then she said okay, she'd still do it. It was like only if she thought someone else might be listening would she still do it. That's the impression I got at least.

So I walked to her office and then this other guy comes in, office supply, and she was almost telling me to wait outside. The guy said, "Another representative will come see you in 9-12 months" and she looked up and grinned. I have no idea what that was about.

So I don't know. But then she told me, after he'd left, that she couldn't do it for me and she hadn't received the other part. I thought well she might be telling the truth about that. But then I said, "But it showed it had been sent from my inbox" and the other guy said from his office, "Smitty", it's here and said he was sending it over.

So he sent it over. By the time she faxed it, it was past the time she thought it needed to be sent, by deadline. But it's fine. I still have a day actually.

And actually, since I asked for Special Set, that can be made any time, for any reason. So I'm fine.

What I thought was horrible, was how I told her that I didn't have a way to request a new public defender until I did this and they acted like it was a big deal and they couldn't do this.

I mean, I'm sorry, but that was NOT asking too much. They know who I am like everyone in town, and how I've been screwed over, and instead of just printing and faxing 2 pages, after what has gone on in this town, they think that I'M the one trying to abuse some kind of system.

So she did it but it was done 6 minutes after 5 p.m. so if it had really mattered, it could have been a problem, and then she shut the door and told me to sit down and then stands over me. Literally, she had me sit on a couch and stood over me, in front of me, with her arms crossed even (I think).

I thought why in the world.

So I'm sitting there and she started saying, "I think you've gotten through life by being a fast talker..." and then started saying how people don't like "pushy" and she said she thought I was going to have to hear no a few times. I felt it was completely unnecessary and harassing. I stood up and said, "I don't have a problem with 'no' but what I don't respect is when someone says they're going to do something and then, without good cause, doesn't do it."

So then Smitty comes BURSTING out of his office, clapping his hands together and says, "That's it! Get out of here! I'm calling the police!"

He said "calling the police" about one second after bursting out of his office.

He didn't have to force me to leave because I was standing up to leave anyway and she was the one who had shut the door. So I walked out after saying "fuck you." I said it only after being treated this way, but I regreted it, not for them but for me, because I later thought it was inexcusable that I allowed them to upset me at all. I had done nothing wrong and I didn't need to be denigrated and called "fast talker" as if I was some kind of street con. Here I am, a totally normal person who has talents and skills and is good at working and working with others, but just gets screwed over in a state where everyone knows I'll be screwed over, in a town where people are easily bought and caught and then nobody cares, and I'm called "fast talker".

I said this as I walked out immediately. Then I went down the wrong hall, and I had to go past that office again, and of all things, she is standing there, grinning, and mocking and doing a wiggly finger wave. I flipped her off in response and left and that's what bothered me most, was that I even imitated her in my response. They were not even worth any response at all. I mean, there is something wrong, to make such a huge deal out of nothing and then lord it over me and then give evidence of serious anger management issues.

So I walked down to the bike shop and asked where the restroom was and I talked to this bike shop guy for a little while and then when I was leaving, the police were approaching me. This guy, whose secretary or who himself wanting to screw me over on a last minute motion, knowing the circumstances, literally called the police. For no reason other than to harass me.

So the police came and they said I wasn't to go back there and I said I didn't need the notice because I had no plans to do so.

I wanted to see which officers and it was Matney and Torres. I really did not get a good vibe from either of them. Matney has done some strange things in the past, sort of stopping me once and harassing me as if I'd done something wrong when I didn't. Torres, I didn't recognize him, but in general, I didn't have a good feeling.

Then a couple of guys came in to the library after me and I didn't have a very good feeling about them either. They were both wearing blue and yet something didn't feel right. One guy was white and large and the other guy was black with dreadlocks. One said to the other, "Are you ready?" and the other said, more than ready. I just had a bad vibe.

So then I was walking past these guys and this other man with a little girl was taking her to her ballet and she had this cute little pink tutu on and this bag with a butterfly and she was truly, one of the most beautiful little girls I've ever seen. Gorgeous, gorgeous. I chatted with her Dad a little, who was also wearing blue (so nothing against blue, or red or white or yellow or anything at all) and I had to ask, because she had a very unique look and it wasn't quite American so I asked what her background was and he said "English and Russian". This girl was beeeaaautiffful. Truly. She is going to be stunning one day.

It was nice to speak with someone friendly after feeling harassed.

The offices that were really nice to me and just casual, I appreciated too, because they didn't make a big deal out of anything.

Check On My Son NOW Please & Vibe

I think someone needs to check on my son again and also look out for him tommorrow morning before the visit. And that means, people checking up on people who are checking up on him because some of these people, have not been good.

I've been getting threats and bad things are happening to me, which also means people will be doing or trying to do things to my son.

I need people to check on him and I believe the non-lethal stuff is going on. His speech was good and he was doing better.

Even though very bad things were happening with me, and all was going wrong, I still felt this strange peace and like something underneath it was okay. Now, for the first time in awhile, this has changed. Today was a turbulent day and it was very heavy and depressed, and I know it means something and it is most definitely not a "mood".

Washington State General Rule 33 (access to court)

GENERAL RULES RULE 33
Requests for Accommodation by Persons with Disabilities

(a) Definitions. The following definitions shall apply under this rule:

(1) "Accommodation" means measures to make each court service, program,
or activity, when viewed in its entirety, readily accessible to and usable
by an applicant who is a qualified person with a disability, and may
include but is not limited to:

(A) making reasonable modifications in policies, practices, and
procedures;

(B) furnishing, at no charge, auxiliary aids and services, including
but not limited to equipment, devices, materials in alternative formats,
qualified interpreters, or readers; and

(C) as to otherwise unrepresented parties to the proceedings,
representation by counsel, as appropriate or necessary to making each
service, program, or activity, when viewed in its entirety, readily
accessible to and usable by a qualified person with a disability.

(2) "Applicant" means any lawyer, party, witness, juror, or any other
individual who has a specific interest in or is participating in any
proceeding before any court.

(3) "Court" means any court or other agency or body subject to the
rulemaking authority of the Supreme Court.

(4) "Person with a disability" means a person covered by the Americans
with Disabilities Act of 1990 (§ 42 U.S.C. 12101 et seq.), RCW 49.60 et
seq., or other similar local, state, or federal laws. This term includes
but is not limited to an individual who has a physical or mental impairment
that limits one or more major life activities, has a documented history of
such an impairment, or is regarded as having such an impairment.

(5) "Qualified person with a disability" means a person with a disability
who is otherwise entitled to participate in any program, service, or
activity made available by any court.
(b) Process for Requesting Accommodation.

(1) An application requesting accommodation may be presented ex parte in
writing, or orally and reduced to writing, on a form approved by the
Administrative Office of the Courts, to the presiding judge or officer of
the court or his or her designee.

(2) An application for accommodation shall include a description of the
accommodation sought, along with a statement of the impairment
necessitating the accommodation. The court may require the applicant to
provide additional information about the qualifying impairment to help
assess the appropriate accommodation. Medical and other health information
shall be submitted under a cover sheet created by the Administrative Office
of the Courts for use by applicants designated "SEALED MEDICAL AND HEALTH
INFORMATION" and such information shall be sealed automatically. The court
may order that such information be sealed if it has not previously
automatically been sealed.

(3) An application for accommodation should be made as far in advance as
practical of the proceeding for which the accommodation is sought.
(c) Consideration. A request for accommodation shall be considered and
acted upon as follows:

(1) In determining whether to grant an accommodation and what
accommodation to grant, the court shall:

(A) consider, but not be limited by, the provisions of the Americans
with Disabilities Act of 1990 (§ 42 U.S.C. 12101 et seq.), RCW 49.60 et
seq., and other similar local, state, and federal laws;

(B) give primary consideration to the accommodation requested by the
applicant; and

(C) make its decision on an individual- and case-specific basis with
due regard to the nature of the applicant's disability and the feasibility
of the requested accommodation.

(2) If an application for accommodation is filed five (5) or more court
days prior to the scheduled date of the proceeding for which the
accommodation is sought, and if the applicant otherwise is entitled under
this rule to the accommodation requested, the accommodation shall be
provided unless:

(A) it is impossible for the court to provide the requested
accommodation on the date of the proceeding; and

(B) the proceeding cannot be continued without prejudice to a party to
the proceeding.

(3) If an application for accommodation is filed fewer than five (5)
court days prior to the scheduled date of the proceeding for which the
accommodation is requested, and if the applicant otherwise is entitled
under this rule to the accommodation requested, the accommodation shall be
provided unless:

(A) it is impractical for the court to provide the requested
accommodation on the date of the proceeding; and

(B) the proceeding cannot be continued without prejudice to a party to
the proceeding.

(4) If a requested accommodation is not provided by the court under
subsection (c)(2) or (c)(3) of this rule, the court must offer the
applicant an alternative accommodation.

(d) Denial. Except as otherwise set forth in subsection (c)(2) or (c)(3) of
this rule, an application for accommodation may be denied only if the court
finds that:

(1) the applicant has failed to satisfy the substantive requirements of
this rule;

(2) the requested accommodation would create an undue financial or
administrative burden;

(3) the requested accommodation would fundamentally alter the nature of
the court service, program, or activity; or

(4) permitting the applicant to participate in the proceeding with the
requested accommodation would create a direct threat to the safety or well-
being of the applicant or others.

(e) Order. The court shall issue an order consistent with its decision.
If the court denies a requested accommodation pursuant to section (d) of
this rule, the order shall specify the reasons for the denial. If a
requested accommodation is not provided by the court under subsection
(c)(2) or (c)(3) of this rule, the court's order shall include a
description of:

(1) the facts and/or circumstances that make the accommodation impossible
under subsection (c)(2) or impractical under subsection (c)(3); and

(2) the reasons why the proceeding cannot be continued without
prejudicing a party to the proceeding.
The court shall inform the applicant and the court personnel responsible
for implementing accommodations that the request for accommodation has been
granted or denied, in whole or in part, and the nature of the accommodation
to be provided, if any.

(f) Duration of Accommodation. The accommodation ordered shall commence
on the date set forth in the order granting the accommodation and shall
remain in effect for the period specified in the order, which may be
extended as the court deems appropriate. The court may grant an
accommodation for an indefinite period or for a particular proceeding or
appearance.
Comment
Access to justice for all persons is a fundamental right. It is the policy
of the courts of this state to assure that persons with disabilities have
equal and meaningful access to the judicial system. Nothing in this rule
shall be construed to limit or invalidate the remedies, rights, and
procedures accorded to any person with a disability under local, state, or
federal law.

[Adopted effective September 1, 2007.]

Evidence From Medical Records of Lawyer's Lying

I got proof my lawyer lied. He lied more than once, of course, but I just got medical records which prove he was sitting on my case.

He told me he didn't have my medical records and couldn't do anything and I just got evidence from records that he was copied all information by the doctor in January. Justin Titus lied and said he had nothing. He got that much, without my consent. It's right here in the record.

Then, he went out of his way to pretend he was interested in my case, and asked me, in MARCH, for a copy of the records. I refused and he got them anyway, AGAIN, when he was lying and claiming he never had them to begin with but he did. And the consent form he used wasn't official.

He maliciously went out of his way to obtain my records, knowing I didn't want this, knowing it would cause me distress, when he ALREADY had them and was sitting on them and lying and claiming to have nothing. I have notes from the clinic about his duplicate efforts.

He did this throughout my whole case. SIX months. He also lied to me about getting the audio CDs for this case.

Correction! on Doctors (the good, the bad, and the UGLY)

I have to correct something that I wrote about Ruckman and Ettinger. Their notes were good.

What I had was a cover sheet where a nurse wrote something down for discharge notes.

Ettinger's notes confirmed migraine and were professional. And Ruckman's notes were for fatigue and I guess I remember I did go in for something like that at least one time when I was very sick with flu.

So I'm going to go back and correct the entry I made. The yellow discharge notes were written by nurses, not by the doctors.

I haven't gone through all the notes, the written records, but so far, I don't have anything to complain about with the doctors I thought were in question because it was the nurses that wrote this down and it was just on a discharge thing and not an official record.

The only thing I found to be inaccurate so far, was something about my having "blackouts", remote blackouts or something in question but I don't have those. I had one minor one when I had my accident and never since.

However, I'm discovering my lawyer lied more than I thought he did.
***************************
I am just skimming these notes, and many of these doctors did a great job. Most of them. Their notes are pretty factual.

However, I was right about Dr. Matthew Marion. That guy is no good. He is the one I saw at Central Washington who I had such an odd encounter with, where he was the only doctor in the valley who was trying to bring in a social worker for a migraine. His notes are very biased and he tried to make me sound crazy again, and he contradicts himself. He claims in one section that I'm in no acute distress and comfortable and then in the next section he claims I'm crying and upset. He totally contradicts himself.

Either I'm in distress or I'm not. He also makes light of the computer hacking issue where I was trying to send a note to the court and had him look. He doesn't confirm that he saw what I saw, even though he did. He just tries to make me sound nutty.

I saw Dr. Gottlieb today and I had a good impression about him, in general. I think he may have some questions about me but he looked sorry today and sort of, I don't know. I have the feeling that he would at least back me up on what was going on with my computer and I know for sure that Nancy would. So if Dr. Marion wants to lie, he can lie all he wants. He's a good looking man, and that's about it, that Dr. He wrote a very dramatic script. He could probably write something like a John Grisham novel. I don't believe Wenatchee Valley hired him, he just rotates here.

Abnormal Computer Hacking and Other

I tried to sign up for a new account at a different house. I asked if I could use their desktop computer and they said yes.

My account was intercepted and the information on my profile changed. It occured at a house inbetween 1267 and 1297 (or was it 1247?) on Cherry Street.

It was their regular desktop. I walked over to that house and asked if I could use the restroom and computer quickly. They said yes and when I sat down, I didn't go to any of my accounts that I have on my normal laptop. I just went to yahoo and tried to open a brand new account, and instead of giving a referring email address I chose a secret question and answer.

There was a slight delay when I was trying to "continue" to the next screen and on, and instead of going straight over, it came back as, instead of "Jenn Thompson" it came back to me as "Jenn F. Lynnwood". It said this was how I'd be seen. Then when I called rivercom I had Jenny answering.

There have also been a ton of trucks going by today and just a lot of commotion. "Mayflower" and "Overbye" and people going by, grown women, mocking me and waving their hands torwards their faces, like fanning as if they're having hot flashes and then another driving by in a car with flames.
*****************************
I also have my computer start up going to several open internet pages again, with different numbers, not allowing me to do anything until it brings up all of the open explorer pages. Right now it wouldn't let me do anything until it brought up "6" and before that it was 12 and then 10. It's not very normal.

The heating thing of the laptop is also happening.

Bad Vibe Today

I have a bad vibe. I've had it all day today since this morning.

I feel it's my son. No one will be checking on my son or checking on who is with my son today.

I also think there is something else going on that's very dark and I can tell, this is the feeling I get when I know things are being plotted.

The vibe that I have is very deep, very sad, and very bad. Bad people are winning at something.

Doctors Trying To Screw Me Over Still

I just looked at the discharge notes which I got for a couple of visits to ER for migraine. I went in for MIGRAINE, and got TREATED for MIGRAINE, with ergotamine, and Dr. Ettinger wrote on the discharge notes, or that nurse Ally, wrote I was there for "Weakness".

Then I have another one for "Fatigue" when I was there for Migraine.

Then, a couple of the doctors just wrote "headache" instead of migraine, but I was treated for migraine. I had someone say "headache" is the same thing, but the thing is, it still dimishes what really happened.

It doesn't really matter, the headache stuff as much as I was shocked to see I had been written up as going in for "weakness" and "fatigue" when the primary cause was migraine. I mean, maybe weakness or fatigue secondary to migraine and low iron or who knows what, but seeing this just confirms to me that I'm being discredited, still, or attempts are still being made.

Monday, March 29, 2010

Visit With Son (Skippyjonjones, Mozart, & Pooh)

My son had two small round parallel marks on his left knee and then one small picked off piece of skin up higher by his left ear. I would have thought the mark on the knee was normal until I saw the mark near his ear. He also had some small mark on his chin. I don't know what that was from. He also had a piece picked off of one of his fingers.

Of course, no one in the state cares. They let all these things happen and just want my rights to be terminated and promise my aunt and uncle and family that everything will be fine. Next thing they want to do, is move in on my family and my family is too confident and intimidated to believe me.

His speech was much better. He sounded more like he had been going through some of the other stuff with non-lethal weapons. He seemed to be happy this morning. To me, he still showed signs of brainwashing and I also saw all kinds of things laid out in the visitation room again, just like there was last time and every time.

I would like to know why this country is allowing this, and why the FBI is not directly involved at this point. If they are not doing anything about it, it's because they're corrupt.

Last visit, was the "king" visit where everything laid out was like a farewell to some kind of royalty theme. My son wore a shirt with royal lions on it and then on the inside it said "made in pakistan".

Today was the Forest Tancer and Joy Sterling day I guess, where everything was about trees and a tree again and horses. Oh, but throw in the number "5" for good measure for everything. I have no idea who comes up with this stuff. I'm not blaming this family I just mentioned either. I'm just saying what is going on.

There were basically, what I took to be thinly veiled threats in the room as well. Some stuff about the "elephant treed" when the people in this town have joked about how I wore the elephant mask for my Cyrano act in jr. high. Then, there was the Bambi book sticking out with a fawn. Two Little Mermaid books on display. Not one, but two. Because I need to see The Little Mermaid more than once I guess, and be reminded of what was done to my voice. Someone in a state office did this.

The main things my son did which were obviously something he was coached to do, was someone told him to ask me to "Scratch my back". Not "rub my back" but "scratch my back". This isn't something he came up with on his own, or my aunt and uncle came up with. And he kept saying he wanted horses (the toy horses) to kiss him. He looked like he was almost falling asleep when I was scratching his back and then he was wide awake. Just like this little girl from the preschool with the Strawberry Shortcake doll who asked me to rub her back.

My son definitely had better speech, or clarity of mind. But I still wondered about a couple of other things. He was dressed in all blue basically and then wanted his jello and showed me there were 2 gingerbread men and 1 tree. Whatever that's supposed to mean, because the landlord had positioned 3 large logs in my apartment and then took one upstairs at some point. And in the last visit, a red piece of paper was positioned on the ground, and a blue piece of paper, but the yellow piece was way over on the other side next to the wall. But someone had purposefully put paper out like that, and then had all the animals together except the blue plane and the yellow chickie I think, were turned over like they crashed.

The monitor today was wearing brown shoes and then a black pullover that said "Calvin Klein" on the side.

I gave my son a seeded dandilion to blow out and he wanted me to help so we blew it out together. Then I gave him some yellow tulips I found along the side of the road, in the public way (not from a yard) with a little green trim (a yellow & greenish succulent). I brought him the book "Skippyjonjones in the doghouse" and he was very excited about this. I also brought a Mozart CD. It had:
1. Eine kleine Nachtmusik: 1. Allegro (Boston Symphony/Erich Leinsdorf)
2. wouldn't play
3. Laudate Dominum: Lucia Popp/Munich Radio Symphony/Kurt Eichhorn
4. Turkish March/Rondo alla turca: Walter Hautzig (one of my personal favorites!)

Before I continue, I have to interupt, as I found this piece--
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=C4YB0-xji7k (don't know who it's by) of Turkish March. I listened to these pieces while pregnant with my son and he seemed to like them and be perked up by them. He lost some interest but when I was conducting with imaginary sticks and da-dah-dahing along with the music, he had big smiles. Then I whistled along with the Turkish March.

I just looked it up, and it's by maybe an unknown (sort of?) from China who lives in Canada. Very good! The word that came to mind after hearing it to the end was "splendid" and where I got that word I don't know...I don't use it myself. But it just popped to mind as the perfect adjective. I can sense the emotion or feeling in this rendition, very bright and cheerful.

I think this one and the nachtmusik are great for kids. I also liked the laudate dominum which I wasn't really familiar with. It's all from this RCA Victrola CD: The Best Of Mozart.

So we listened to some pieces and then he wanted the book so I read it and then he wanted me to use the animals to play with. So he asked me to scratch his back and I did and he almost fell asleep. Then I read the book to him again from last time, about the mummy. And then I got the CDs out for the books and he was very happy to hear them and flip through at the same time. Then he showed me his jello and liked this a lot and then we were in the bathroom drying his pants which got wet and then we were back in the room and I found a Winnie-the-Pooh card matching game and he made all the matches and liked doing this a lot. I would say, "a hammer for the..." and he would say, "nail!" and I would say, "honey pot for..." and he would exclaim "pooh!" He got very upset when I "helped him find something". He didn't want my help or for me to make it easy for him. He wanted to do it himself.
************
I just listened to the first clip I selected of cosi fan tutte: saove sia il vento:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RwOBSbP4iZ4
I think I skipped past this in our visit maybe because it was more sad and not as bright for my visit with him. It was the 5th song and then it was:
6. Piano Concerto No. 20 in D Minor: lll. Rondo. (this is minor key but doesn't feel as sad to me, as cosi fan tutte)
7. Symphony No. 41 in C "Jupiter": IV. Molto Allegro

I think that's as far as we got. Here's the first rendition I clicked on: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Fcly8-RGhgw
It's good. I started to laugh when reading some of the comments posted.

Anyway, at about this song I think, he turned it off. I wasn't sure why he kept turning it off. He really enjoyed it and this was evident but, I don't know. It sounds weird, but it didn't seem like something he would do. Anyway, then he was nodding his head to some of the music in the skippyjonjones book and it was a bossa nova style and I said I'd bring some of that next time. I sort of feel like he's been coached not to enjoy music with me.

Because some of our strongest bonding moments were while we sang, danced to music, or listened to music together. He would sob when he had to leave and then the monitors and CPS took the music box out of the room. It was there until music became too much of a threat I guess.

So, seriously, they took it away and said they didn't have one anymore. Almost half a year later I see it in the other rooms now and then and then it was there. But my son started using strange behavior of saying "no music" or "no singing!" and literally, I feel he was coached to this.

He's probably been in a fucking CIA style cuban prison between that daycare and whatever happened there and then the house. I mean, what the hell? He goes from being absolutely fanatic and enthusiastic about music to acting very strange about it, but it was after they took the music box away from our visits.

He would cry and not want to leave and was becoming more and more affectionate and bonded, and looked forward to it as much as I did, and then someone decided they would take that from us because it was actually developing and nurturing our bond and providing something that was probably missed at home. They didn't want me and my music winning over the affections of my son.

So I still sang with him after they took it away but then he started acting brainwashed.

As a matter of fact, when I brought in our own box eventually (bc I didn't have one to bring for a long time) or radio, they would tell me to turn it almost all the way off, claiming it was "too loud" and they would tell me not to sing, saying the other workers complained it was "too loud".

These workers at CPS have done everything in their power to try to BREAK our bond. They went out of their way even, and not once, have I seen instances of good faith at reuinfication and honesty. Not once.

Oh, at one point he was talking about the horses a lot and he wanted them to be flying so I had the horses flying all over the place. Then I sang the songs, "Oh Susanna" and then "She'll Be Coming Round The Mountain (when she comes)".

Oh, and I thought about the car from the Cheerio box, and took it out and my son and I tore off the wrapper and then he put the shell stickers on it.

What I also found disturbing, was that no matter how many times I said it was a seashell, he kept saying "fish" and it is a kind of fish but usually he accepts correction and it was more like someone had drilled this into his head. In the past, too, he's known the difference between a shell and a crab and a fish. So I thought it was odd that he was prepared with this alternate idea. I took it out of the Cheerio box and seriously, I question what my level of privacy has been in this house. I took it out in the kitchen. I didn't bring it out on the "king shirt" day, or royalty shirt (I stand corrected) day, bc I forgot about it and brought it out today instead, after getting my nice little reminder spam mail a day or two ago. Yes, the Cheerio box was completely sealed, top and bottom. I double-checked. I don't remember what the point of the Shell station was really. I actually forgot. When I think of that kind of a shell though, I think about Diana.

I'm a WITCH! or the CIA is secretly conspiring to make me Queen at the chagrin of Mossad! Or no! they're working together to drive me nuts! wheeeeee! I'm joking but for some reason I feel sad to write this.

I really don't know who is trying to help and who is just screwing me over. I felt very good and strong energy during the visit with my son and for some reason, during the Turkish March. Last week too. Of course, in general with my son. But there have been times I've felt sadness.

I don't think feeling sadness means it's wrong or bad. Maybe it's just picking up on something.
*******
I just want to say, I don't orchestrate my life or try to navigate anything other than the mess with my son. If I wear something, it's random. If I pick something out, like the CD and book, it's random or with normal thoughts in mind--I knew my son likes skippy so I got another one. I didn't read it first to think about how it will sound to the world which somehow gets all my info. I had just been blogging about the turkish march and it came on t.v. on the channel I was on (click, to new channel). I was actually going to get the 3 tenors bc my son and I watched this and he liked them, when we were together--he seemed fascinated and sat watching them sing through the whole thing. But I couldn't find it so I grabbed the first Mozart CD I found.

Thought About A Glass Of Wine

I thought about having a glass of wine, very small amount, and decided against it. I poured it out and then poured it right back. I have been told I could help myself to any liquor or wine after it's been opened but I am not sure if that is a good idea when I am making it a policy not to drink or consume anything that's opened already, no matter what it is!

I could definitely use a glass and think it's beneficial in very small amounts, and in Europe it's no big deal, to have a sip or so in very small minor amounts, but I think it's probably best not to.

During my pregnancy with my son, I didn't have a drop, and I also didn't even have coffee at all. I've decided a small amount of coffee is okay but that's probably it.

I also think I have to get the restriction not to drink eliminated because I have NEVER been an alcoholic or had a problem with drinking and I don't even have an addictive personality type as I quit smoking all on my own, which is reportedly the most difficult habit to break of all the habits. I feel that telling an adult woman, through a court order, not to have a glass of wine is completely a violation of my basic rights when there is zero evidence to support the necessity. It is not as if I need to be in AA and abstain for life because there is zero documentation of alcoholism in ME or in the family

I wonder at why my last lawyer didn't even attend to some of the most basic details such as: "do you drink or do drugs? do you smoke?" and then look at what's written about me. He had a clean hair analysis from me and did NOTHING with it.

I mean, the hair analysis was CLEAN. There are so many things he had information for making motions with, and he did nothing.

NADA.

I had a totally clean record for hair analysis, not even showing for any narcotics when I have to go to ER for DHE and 2 vicodin per time, and Michelle Erickson tried to dirty up my record by claiming going to the ER for migraine was for "drug seeking" purposes when they KNOW I have migraines. So it was just one more proof of discrimination against me for disability of migraine.

images

guckenheimer came to mind but i have no idea why, or what it is in regards to.

I guess incidentals would be that I said, out of the blue the other day: georgie porgie, pudding pie...

that rhyme and didn't know why and then the next george I came across was The Madness of King George and I think before I came up with the verse, I'd read something online in an article about how Charles liked him. I agree. I saw the movie a very long time ago (at least 10 years or more) and thought it was excellent and probably it wasn't as bad as they make it out to be and part of it could have been physical and the rest, wasn't so bad. At least more interesting and not boring, like most artistic types. then, i almost chose a curious george book for my son for this visit. it was george, george, george for a couple days.
***********
i got an image tonight, while writing my post about my visit and then moving down, and I don't know who it was but it was a woman, young woman, sobbing and tearing at a cloth with her teeth. what time is it? i don't know. roadshow is on channel 9, house is on 8 and cbs sitcom that was playing mozart's "turkish march" when i was blogging about it, was channel 7. so whatever time THAT is, is what time it is. it didn't seem like a dangerous situation, more like tearing a shirt with teeth that she's wearing and brought up to her mouth or tearing at a pillow case somehow. very aggravated and sobbing. sort of a rounder or squarish face. dark hair or brown hair i think and teens to 20s. it wasn't anyone from royalty or connected with royalty that i've seen at least, just to say so, so it's clear. i couldn't see the face, as usual, just sort of this fuzzy shape and hair and what she was donig but it was very quick, lasting just seconds. the only reason i clarify is because i was just posting about some of that stuff and joking around. so i didn't want to then go to the images and have someone or anyone think it has anything to do with, at least i don't think so...

but it was definitely sort of a style of crying and frustration. I mean, not everyone greives or expresses emotion this way. it crossed my mind to wonder "past" or "present" and i felt, at least, that it was of someone who is about this age at present but it had also flickered in my mind to be about someone who was that age, when she...oh something came to mind but i just don't know so i cannot guess anything at all. i can only say what i saw and i don't know the rest. heaving, sobbing, anguish though, and trying to control it maybe, with this form of tearing with her teeth against cloth. the hair was either pulled back but sort of full around the face or shoulder length or maybe shorter? I didn't really get the impression of longer hair but maybe it was pulled back. i saw the image face on, face towards me but not seeing me. but we were face to face and it was like i wasn't there, i just saw.

Eureka, I Knew It!

I knew it.

Oh, I need a good line of poetry right now. I know what some of the threat is and this is ridiculous! Wow. I am not even kidding. Just keeping my mouth shut for now, but seriously, unbelievable the lengths some will go to. To harm my reputation and son besides!

And the thing is, someone got it very wrong because initially, that wasn't even what any of it was about. Confused wires. I guess we will just have to confuse them more!

Here's my pact with you--hold fast, hold firm, and lie your head off to keep the dogs off the scent.

For some of the others, sometimes potatoes don't mean Idaho OR potassium either, do they? happee hoo-hah holidays.

Saint or Witch? Neither

I don't know where the guy went, who stayed here yesterday. I saw some license plate as I was walking by, about a "saint" and then as I was walking home, some guy is carrying a movie about a "witch".

I had some guys today, I THINK, wanting me to admit I do some kind of rituals or something. I don't. I told this one guy who was talking about a medicine man, that I burned sage in the house because it smells good and wave it around, and he said it's "smudging". But that's not what I'm doing. I don't say any chants or prayers or have any beliefs associated with it. I just do it for the smell.

So then I'm walking home and some guy keeps flashing a witchcraft movie at me.

Not kidding.

I am not a SAINT (everyone knows) and I am also not a WITCH (even though I joke about bewitched and just joke around).

It is what I've said it is and it's just a small gift that's not even very good and I don't have any rituals associated with it at all, other than praying to God sometimes more than at other times.

I got an email about "Shell Station" in my inbox and then took this little car to my son that was all sealed up and came out of a Cheerio box I received. There were 4 types of cars with stickers to affix and this one was Shell Station. And yes, I remembered I had a dream about the Shell Station. What do I think? I don't think anything about it except that it's weird that someone sent me an email (spam) about Shell Station.

Pregnant & Gaining Weight

I put out a couple of ads still, to other agencies, for surrogacy, since this pregnancy might fall through. It is too early to know and I don't know for sure what will happen. I was talking to one agency this morning but then they didn't call later, so I am aware that things fall through. I had one woman at an agency tell me sometimes the intended parents actually CHANGE their minds and the woman is stuck with the baby so you have to consider all options. Some of the agencies are interested in both adoption and also surrogate mothers. But anyway, so I'm just waiting.

I've been eating a ton. I've gained about 8 lbs already, and it didn't show up last time I was on the doctor's scale, but it showed up on someone else's scale. Just hungry all the time. I'm hungry all the time anyway, but moreso.

I'm very glad it's happening now, but at the same time, I need to keep my eyes and ears open. I didn't tell this one agency today that I was already pregnant because you just never know. I got home too late to take their call so have to try to look them up.

At any rate, I don't have morning sickness and never have. I'm a little more moody but not much.

I'm working, eventually, with a lawyer but that's down the road.

I couldn't believe it when this woman told me how some of these parents change their minds. I guess it's really happened. Usually, if anyone changes their mind, it's the surrogate mother and they try to keep the kid and there are legal problems, but that's not what I'm worried about here. If I ended up with a pregnancy and they don't compensate me for it, it will be all of that to go through and no compensation and then, I would probably give it up for adoption in Washington. I don't know if there's an adoption agency in the Wenatchee area at all.

I've really had to go out of my way to be secretive about some things because almost every single thing I do is monitored (or that's how it certaintly comes across).

I asked why some parents change their mind and I was told some of them just decide they can't afford to compensate, or others start feeling iffy about the whole thing and if they want a kid or another kid, afterall. It makes NO sense to me, but I guess this kind of indecision is why some mothers are prego until, I don't know...until up to 6 months even and then they just change their minds for no reason and have an abortion. WHY wait that long?

So I guess it happens with some of these parents, and usually you are compensated a little to protect against that, after about the time of the first heartbeat. You have to wait until there's 1 or 2 months of missed period and then do blood to back up urine and then heartbeat but it's a whole process.

I feel total peace about it. Except for the idea that if they change their minds for any reason, I would have to put it up for adoption. I'm too tired and busy to deal with that. Literally, that would be my worst nightmare. I could have very bad and dark dreams thinking about that!

Illegal Use Of My Email Federal Offense

I continue to have people interferring with my email communications.

I also just got evidence that someone went in and changed my email profile. This is what it said this morning:

Gloria • M • Washington is how you will be seen on Yahoo!, searchable by name and email address. Your birthday (just month/day) is only shared with your Connections. Manage your Profile

Sunday, March 28, 2010

Homeless Venture

I learned a lesson.

I was willing to allow a couple people to be guests and the first one has been respectful but I had to turn someone away.

I was told to call a pastor and I did, to reach this person, and was told they were sleeping in their car so hoped to help, using judgement and the pastor said it was "Destiny" church or something. I don't know. They sounded very nice and I do hope this guy finds help from somewhere, but the problem was that he just walked right in without knocking or anything.

I felt uncomfortable with that. I thought I heard someone in the house and walked out to look and he was standing there and I said, "You didn't knock." He was just facing me and wearing a black shirt with a cross on it. No problem. He said he'd knock but I said, "No, that is a fundamental basic in respect and I'm not comfortable with this." So I asked him to leave. The only thing I'd asked him to bring, if he could I said, would be a couple rolls of toilet paper because we were getting low. So he brought in 12 rolls of MD paper and I told him he could take it with him. He said he didn't want to so I said okay and then he turned and left, and there was this "Savior Jesus" on the back of his shirt with Christ and a burning flame thing, like the "sacred heart of Christ" deal.

I'm actually confused as to what was going on because earlier today he had a different shirt on. I'm confused about what his church is too, because he was making a big deal about it and I told him it was all his business and I didn't need to know anything at all. I told him it was his private business.

I had a place made up for him and it would have been fine, but I just had a bad vibe with the no knocking and just walking in.

My intention was to help out women if I found any but I didn't. These guys said they knew the pastors of this one place, or different pastors, so I thought it was okay but...? I was planning to take numbers first and screen but I talked to a couple of pastors first so thought it was okay.

He said, "Well the pastor's wife says 'God Bless'".

So I think I have learned a lesson. What I don't understand, at all, is why, when he's, I guess a protestant convert of some kind, he wanted to change his shirt and wear one which is catholic? i mean, I don't know if this other guy is catholic, protestant, or jewish or what, but i didn't ask and don't care. It's not a condition to offering shelter, but I just don't get it.

I guess I got a "12" from MD. Maryland? May Day? I mean, if the shirt is supposed to mean something, maybe the toilet paper brand is too for all I know.

I guess I had a couple of reservations because this one guy nodded over to a different guy who was there today, reading some book about "PenDragon" and I didn't get the best vibe. Then, actually, this guy who is here, nodded to the same pendragon guy, and a few others and I just figured, I am doing this to be nice, and I don't know about their affiliations, but just trying to be a good steward of what I have also been given, if it's even for a short time.

When I was walking with this one guy, I had all these cars driving by slowly. Some people taking photos, and I felt like this was a game again. I almost turned him away, not because he wasn't clean at that moment but because I didn't want this to be another game and hurrah for some group motives I know nothing about. But I decided, no, at least this guy could use a shower and has been living next to the river on the hard ground, and I just figured if he's respectful, the least I could do would be to help a little.

It sort of pissed me off thought. While all these people driving brand new SUVs and cars were driving by in glee, after hearing how this other guy had been living out there with nothing when people in town even knew who he was, I thought, "What are THEY doing?" It's one thing to turn a blind eye and another thing entirely to make FUN of someone who is homeless or someone trying to help in some way. I thought it really made some of those who have money look very miserly and mean.

No, I don't always help with housing. But when I can, if it's safe, I have. And I have also given money to people who ask for it, at least a couple bucks, if I can and when I can.

I feel sort of bad about the other person because if he's really in his car, I wanted him to be able to stretch out. But if it's that bad, they do have a place for men, and in general. I just couldn't do a second chance on that. Some things are open for second, third, fourth, fifth...chances. If someone made a mess and didn't clean it up--I wouldn't kick them out. If someone smoked too close to the house, I wouldn't kick them out. If they were dressing in drag and cooking in the kitchen with too much cleavage and stockings showing, I wouldn't say no. Mental illness but not dangerous? no problem. But I felt like that one was just non-negotiable.

I was even giving up the foam mattress I sleep on and was going to sleep on the floor without anything but a blanket and space heater. I was giving him the foam mattress. And I wouldn't have said anything about it either, if it had been done. I wouldn't have blogged, "I slept on the hard floor, blah blah" because I wanted to do it as a practical sacrifice of giving to others, but now, I'm writing about it, because I get pissed when I try to go out of my way to care, and it gets ruined because someone doesn't seem to return the idea.

So now, I guess I will sleep on it myself.

My Email Blocked & Not Going Through

I have been wondering if I'm not getting all of my email. I don't think I am and I don't think everything I send is going out. If my email is being captured and held inbetween transmission, then it's because someone is reading it and then deciding what to do with it.

I set up an account somewhere else and as soon as I try to use it on this laptop, I have problems.

Someone Poured Perm Solution Down My Son's Throat

I went to the homeless place and talked with some people and had lunch with them, after first leaving a note about having a place for someone short term, that was safe.

I found out from someone who was there, that what happened to my son had been talked about on the street and in the park and that some guys held my son down and poured perm solution down his throat.

That's not all that has happened to my son either. But not one person in law enforcement has done one single thing about any of it. To my knowledge, no surveillance, nothing.

People on the street know about things that have happened to my son. They talk about it and it spreads, and I have made a ton of complaints about things happening to my son and how it's obvious, and how people are blocking me from documenting anything. Most likely, intimidating the Avilas as well. I don't think the Avila's would do this to my son, but I do believe that if someone with a lot of power told them to keep their mouths shut or they'd lose my son, they would.

I also know my son has been brainwashed, just like I said, to do and say certain things and some of those things are not things my aunt and uncle would come up with.

I am thankful for those people down there at the homeless shelter, because I tried to give them respect, the same that I would want, and maybe some of them feel that in return, they will share with me.

I will keep anything and everything confidential. And actually, the guy who told me about the perm solution and my son being held down when it was done, he wasn't even in the homeless place but just outside for a little while near it and then left.

But I have monitors and people in state offices colluding to prevent me from documenting the things my son says during visits. They keep me from photographing too.

God bless the poor and may the weak be strong.

Anglican Church Today

I was going for a walk when I remembered it was the Palm Sunday. So I walked to the church. I left about 10 minutes later but it wasn't because there was anything wrong. Billie was the greeter, of course, but you ca't help it if your name is Billie.

Everyone seemed nice, and the main thing I noticed, was that I sensed the presence of the Holy Spirit there. I could literally feel a presence of very powerful calm and warmth in the church. So I know there was something very good there and yet I walked out (not conspicuouslessly).

I felt like not staying after reading the back of the bulletin which had all these quotes about letting go, and acceptance, and not taking control. To me, when I read this, in the context of my situation with my son, it was upsetting. My duty as a mother is to fight and I didn't like reading quotes about giving up.

But I was still going to stay until I went to the bathroom and read more of the bulletin and the rite of Christ and what happens and just reading it made me tear up, in private in the bathroom, and I wasn't going to sit there in public and burst into tears.

So, having assessed whether I could emotionally handle a service which would mean a lot to me and be very lovely and yet, unfortunately, would bring me to tears in public, I decided it would be best to leave. To read the bulletin at home and have it mean something and then try to go another time after I've firmed up a little bit. I'm not depressed at all, it's just that I know sometimes passages are moving for me, and having not been in church for awhile, I didn't want to fight tears. Because it's a very poignant message. It is when they say to Christ "Save Yourself" and I just knew having thought of this very thing the night before while walking, that i couldn't handle it today. So I will try to go another time. I wanted to stay and would have stayed, because I felt the presence of God there, but I had to leave and it wasn't because I was offended at all.

I decided instead to go to a homeless shelter in town and find someone who could make use of a spare room I have, short term. To find a guest/friend.
************
The quotes on the back of the flyer were these:
"Fast from holding on tight and trying to trying to control life."
"Pray for acceptance."
"Give up the illusion of control in a situation today; step back and let someone else take charge."

"In the end, the treasure of life is missed by those who hold on, and gained by those who let go."--Lao Tzu.
***************************

SO this is what was on the back, which might be fine for someone who is having to accept the diagnosis of a disease or something, but in my life, in my world and context, even if the whole world is against me, I know God is not. However, God doesn't force anyone's hand. Those who are not good, God is not going to change for my benefit, because those people have free will. I believe God can create circumstances to soften people's hearts, but that's about it. It's not God's fault. What people have done to me and my son, is not his fault. It's their fault.

As for my life, passifism is not the way to go here. If there is something worth fighting for, you fight for it, and you fight for it to the exclusion of all else. I would not dare to think my "treasure" is in "letting go" of my SON and finding something else in life. God gave my son to me for a reason and bad people, corrupt people, took him from me. If it is a gift of God from the start, it would be immoral and wrong for me to hand it over to others whose right it never was to take. I have nothing to apologize for and nothing to be ashamed of, in what I've been up against, in fighting for my son with integrity. Personally, I don't understand those who give up on their children. I feel that those who do, are maybe better off not being parents afterall.

You do not give up on kids and you do not hand over power and authority to those who abuse it. You take it back, and at all costs, and by any means, you take the land back.

Which is why I am not now falling apart or sobbing or dissolving into nothing. I feel very calm and firm about things and feel it is time for me to make good on my word. That doesn't mean I dislike certain individuals or groups. It just means that I am not going to be afraid or hold back on making reports that need to be made. If there are violations, there are violations, and I can do something about it and where I've failed is that I have NOT done what I said I would do, when I should have. Instead I said, "I forgive you" and allowed these people to just steal from me even more.

Darts: "Not Bad For A Girl"

I got something to help me sleep last night. Now I am getting a migraine this morning. It must be a reaction to the pill they gave me. Also had bloody stuff in tissue this morning. Bloody nose and from mouth a little bit. Not a lot.

I was walking home and stopped by at a house where they were playing darts outside and they said I could join. Just 3 guys and me. He said I could try but looked dubious and then when I was hitting the marks, he said, "That's not bad! I didn't know what to expect you know, because most girls, or women..." I didn't do too bad. Then he gave me a tip because I was throwing curveball darts. He said I could turn my body and didn't have to face straight forward to the dartboard. So I tried this and I all of them in the target and most close to the bullseye. It was a good tip and it worked!

I have always sort of liked darts for some reason but never got to play them much. So we threw several rounds and then I walked back. That was my Saturday night. I really enjoy darts.

First song that came to mind this morning was "Spooky" (love is kinda crazy with a spooky little girl like you). For no reason. It just started running through my head and I wasn't thinking about anything in particular.

I had a lot of dreams last night and didn't write them down. The last few days I've had tons of dreams and just too tired to write them down. Should have had pen and paper right there, ready to pick up.

Saturday, March 27, 2010

Dead Bird Wings On Sidewalk (photo)



I was on my way to walk to the clinic for anxiety due to, primarily, what this law firm has done, and my lawyer, to my case and my son. What they did NOT do, all that time, and then the blocking of me, has done the most damage and has severely prejudiced my case.

I guess that might include the Judge as well, for not granting continuance for migraine. Every single time. I have noticed that if I even once say anything about Judge Hotchkiss, all the motorcycle gang guys come out en force and start buzzing by me scowling. I've been wondering if they are the Hotchkiss posse.

Secondly, more minor, was what the landlord did or has done with excusing unnecessary intrusions in what should be my private living area--my apartment. But this was only the last stray, not the bale of hay. Still, it was malicious to evict me at the moment he did, after what has been done to ME, and then to allow further harassment. Really, I blame the biggest issue on what affects my SON.

So I was walking to the clinic and everyone knew where I was going because it's one way road to the clinic once you make this one turn. Someone had taken a dead bird and cut out the middle, the body, and just left wings spread out there, black and grey and white wings. I don't know what it was supposed to mean, and mainly seemed to be a prank, but what bothered me more than anything were the people who drove by acting like they knew what was there and thinking it was hilarious. Most of them, were all conservative looking white people in SUVs.

388 ZGT
538 UNV
543 UKV
541 WGP

These bird wings were made to look like the wings that were on the profile of the woman I talked to now and then.

A few people who were particularly mocking when I came out of my house to start with, were a blond woman in SUV with plates MULLY-2,638 XID, 727 ZDR, 323 ZRY, 004 WST, 473 UGL (2 or 7), 501 WIG.

I have more plate numbers from yesterday, which was a very harassing day.

I also noticed several people carrying around bags or papers with the words "Special" on it, like today is your "special day" and "specials" and the like and I had been on my computer today and made one ad about services for a "special family" and then just got tons of people throwing this my way today. Then I also noticed, in the waiting room, this young man with a book and he made the cover face me and it said "Drive" and last night I'd been IMing with this woman who wanted things confidential but had no idea that nothing has been private with any of communications because somehow I have people on my laptop or hacking, and I have people bugging my phones and listening in and that is no joke at all. She had brought up a movie "Drive Angry".

The other thing was that I got a lot of things right again, with her, but won't say what bc I promised not to, but I really did, in a genuine way. I shocked myself even. So I am feeling a little bit more confident about having a gift but it's really not so big as that of some I see. I watched some episodes of Lisa Williams and I get things in a similiar way, but not to that amount of detail and not knowing it's spirits of the dead or anything.

Yesterday too I laughed after inviting a guy to eat with me at Arby's. He was glum and then he sounded schitzo but it was so funny I couldn't help it and started laughing out loud and then he was laughing and hamming it up. He called himself micky mo. But with him, I sensed someone he'd known had committed suicide. He said he'd known a lot of people who had, about 5 or more, but sometimes he was joking so I didn't know for sure. But it was the first thing that popped to mind.

Trespass In My Apartment

I walked out of my room, into my apartment to find 3 men standing outside of my door. I had no make up and was not prepared to see anyone. I had underwear that I was washing by hand in the sink, in the bathroom.

The landlord decided he was going to show this place while I was here, with no notice to me at all. Not even a word, or a knock.

I asked him politely to do this another time and that he hadn't given me any notice. He waved me away.

He continued to show the man and his son the whole place, the bathroom with my underwear in the sink soaking, and everything.

I called Wenatchee police and Officer Carlson's voice had a smirk in it and he said it wasn't "criminal" it was "civil". I said, no, it was illegal to just come into an apartment and bring people into it, without any notice.

It was a comlete violation of my privacy. I got on the phone and tried to call 411 for Washington State Police and I burst into tears while talking to the 411 service operator and forgot she wasn't even a police officer or anyone I should talk to about this. I was so distressed that I forgot she wasn't with a law agency. I just sobbed over the phone to her and then remembered oh yeah, I needed the number for the other police. So I called the state and told them what had happened.

I can't prove other trespassing, but I was able to go outside and get the plate number of the man and his son as they were driving away. He drove a white truck, license plate: B83113C. It wasn't their fault, but they are witnesses to the fact he was showing it and I didn't want them there without notice.

So then I looked up the law and found what had happened was a violation of RCW 59.18.150 which says a tenant can expect 1 day notice before entry.

A different couple of officers came out after I called state police and I talked to Jim West and he said I would need to look at the contract because he was being told there was some provision in it. I said I would, on Monday, when I could talk to someone about it. He said do you really want to do anything? and said I needed to focus on getting a place. He said maybe I don't want to add to things. I said, I thought I was too nice and didn't do enough. I threaten to do things and don't follow through and people have just gotten worse and taken advantage of me more. It hasn't done any good to just let things go. And I've let a lot of things go.

This landlord has done a lot of things to humiliate me. He's let various people into my room and taken photos and someone has come in and messed things up on more than one occasion. And that's not to mention being harassed by the other housemates and having my important things stolen from this room.

New Anglican Pastor In Town

So I wrote to my lawyer "I wouldn't be so cocksure to think someone wasn't listening in on the phone when (you lied to me)" and I never use that word "cocksure" and then that day I met this guy who was in Europe for awhile, who is the new pastor in town for an Episcopal church. Doug Cockbill.

He said Episcopal is the same thing as Anglican basically and he's been here 2 weeks and was in Jerusalem and the Gulf for awhile. So I'm confused about how he got this English accent but he said he was in Europe for 20 years.

He just got here 2 weeks ago and I ended up sitting next to him when I didn't know who he was at all. After I sat down though, I said to him, "You're not from this area are you?" and then said something about I thought he was from out of the country and this was before he'd said a word. So he was the one who said, "How did you know that?"

He asked if I reeally believed in God or just went to church and sort of believed. I said I really do believe, sincerely. So he said we should get together and talk about God and he invited me to church. I told him I'd once gone to an Anglican church, many many years ago, in Portland, Oregon and thought the pastor was good. So I asked him why he was in Wenatchee and if he'd been put out to pasture. His remark was that he'd put up for torture or something like that. He was joking though. It wasn't hard to banter with him at least. I could probably toss one back with him and have some laughs.

One hour after using the word "cocksure" I meet Cockbill. He wrote his name down and I almost passed out. I was calm and collected though. Then, I hoped he wasn't making fun and that I wasn't sport because it said "HELP" on the paper he gave me from his inbox and then something about banking and then beggars and I hoped he didn't think I was a beggar. I guess some might but if they knew what I've been up against maybe not.

I feel I have half of the world with their feet on my back, arms folded, watching the clock. My son to the side, no one cares. It's me they care about. Maybe others, wanting me to get ahead but wondering what in the world is going on themselves.

I decided to look for a random scripture verse online and I got this one. I decided not to click on the first link that came up but just went random. I guess it's for yesterday though.

Romans 8:37
Yesterday, March 27, 2010, 12:01:00 AM
No, in all these things we are more than conquerors through him who loved us.

Then I clicked on the verses passage:

Isaiah 61:1
Yesterday, March 27, 2010, 12:01:00 AM
The Spirit of the Lord GOD is upon me, because the LORD has anointed me to bring good news to the poor; he has sent me to bind up the brokenhearted, to proclaim liberty to the captives, and the opening of the prison to those who are bound....

IMing

I will make a space here.

There has been someone who started Iming me with a great deal of interest in Nicolas Cage, supposedly. Initially, with royalty too but then just Cage. Most of the time seeming normal but then sometimes, saying very creepy things and making veiled threats. She has written things which make fun as well, last night suggesting I wear a hat to "block intuition" like the psychic Lisa Williams. Other times, it's been making fun of something else. But still seeming interested in my psychic ability and confirming some things I've said are right.

They changed their profile to read:

Bon-Bon
FemaleIllinois
“Experiencing a lesson in futility....which goes against everything that I am or believe in. It's truly a painful awakening.” said 33 hours ago
**********
They changed it after I said I would look it up. Some of the advice has been helpful but other things that have been said in the past were questionable...but what bothers me is that she (or he) has popped up to chat, right after I'm looking up something that's English, like she knows or someone knows what I'm looking up. The other night, it was after I was looking up Queen Elizabeth and then tonight, after I was looking up this man I met who is an Anglican pastor who is new in town.
*********************

She wrote to me after I made this post and I won't say what about. However, I have not revealed the content of our discussions or what we talked about yesterday.

Anything we talked about was getting out to others without my saying a thing. A couple nights before she'd logged in and just typed "last check made tonight" or something and all day the next day I had people saying things to me about a "check" or "checks" when usually no one brings this up. For example, a librarian said "I found a check in a book today!" (a male librarian). Which is no big deal until you have a lot of people talking about it so it's clear people have hacked into my business and can see what I'm doing or know someone who is sharing things.
*************
When her screenname first appeared: simplymeME, another one appeared below it and it was: srstephenl. But no one wrote from this, it just popped up as available at the same time.

Ex Tried To Set Me Up To Go To Prison

I don't think it will help to conceal the truth. If anything, my Ex has had a lot of sympathy when I don't believe he should have any at all, after what he tried to pull. And there were other groups behind it and I don't think they deserve my silence either, because they misled people and then tried to get sympathy and had me put on a blacklist.

He was connected to Maryland court workers and also to the U.S. federal government and they wanted him here and they wanted me trashed. I wouldn't have met the CIA communications man through him if this wasn't the case.

They tried to have me locked up.

He never wanted me to have my son and did several things to keep me from getting court records in Maryland and being able to prove certain things. He also tried to stall on things to keep the clock ticking.

I also know some people from Europe were very interested in him and in trying to do something with me, possibly because they felt I was a threat in some way.

When some things went awry, they tried to get sympathy for him, hatred for me, and then bent over backwards to try to smear me more.

I have had people trying to kill me and poison me and zero protection from the U.S. and this is why they don't care. They care about their own objectives and I am disposable. My son? Is disposable.

I also believe some of the motive was possibly religious for some and that others who were not of the same religion, were willing to go along simply because they were getting paid. Another fear factor was the idea that I'd sparked any interest with any member of the royal family or that I was interested in the case of Princess Diana.

I was given medications without my knowledge or consent as well and it was most likely some form of experimental psychological medication or birth control. He claimed he wanted children with me but it was a lie and he never did. He almost passed out and looked very dark when I said I thought I might be pregnant.

I stopped having my period the whole time I was with him and then I only had my normal periods again, 2-3 months after we separated and I was no longer eating food he gave to me. After he left, I had more of my period each month until by the 2nd or 3rd month I was wondering what the hell they had put me on. He didn't want to use protection half the time or didn't care but I insisted.

I had a normal period every month after that but then I had people going after me with non-lethal weapons, stealing my things, trying to say I was nuts again, poisoning me, and even doing what they did to my voice.

I was also given food to eat by other military persons in the U.S., and others, from the time my son was separated from me and all that time I thought something was wrong with my fertility. When I was able to buy my own food for a whole month, my periods would be totally normal.

I met him after I was put up in a hotel by someone who works for the Department of Defense. Probably some of those people worked for more than one group and someone thought I knew everything and that's why they wanted to get rid of me.

Everytime he separated or was apart from me, I had more wackos and weirdos come out of the woodwork than you can imagine, and people trying to kill me and poison me. Every single time, there was some kind of celebration and my Ex seemed happy whenever he thought I was close to losing my son.

He claims he'll have to go back to Colombia but he won't because he's worked out his deals with government workers who want him here. If he does, he'll be able to come back.

I had someone tell me on the subway one day, that I would be in Canada in 2 years and I don't know why.

What I DO know, is that the U.S. has been behind some of this and they stood back and did nothing while several government workers knew what was happening to my son and that I was not mentally ill and I was innocent. There are government workers who have not WANTED me to be with my son because they wanted to use me for something else.

The real question is, why am I being persecuted and blacklisted and blamed for not getting married when I knew that person had tried to pass me off to go to federal jail?

Oh I'm just sure you'd want to sign on the line after that.

He also cheated on me, which may not be a big deal to most but it was something I asked him not to do, and he allowed me to be put in humiliating situations.

All I ever asked for, was to have my son and I safe and free from corruption and harm and to live a normal life. One would think this could be managed. Instead, I am harassed, hounded, and blacklisted, and this is a country that claims to be "free".