I discovered the English indie rock band "Bloc Party" a few months ago, while looking up the Anne Of Green Gables theme song on YouTube. There's a cool montage video with clips from this movie but set to the song "Banquet" by Bloc Party. So I looked them up. I really like the song "Banquet" and have played it over and over. I listened to a few others. One which was more popular in the U.S., was, I guess, "I Remember You" but I don't like it as well, personally. I like "Eating Glass" and I'm still getting familiar with their music, but I love "Banquet".
The music video to Anne Of Green Gables is pretty cool.
"Positive Tension" is also really good. "You're just as boring as everyone else!" (from the song). Wow. Yeah...Still listening to this one...It's my new favorite.
Hmm. Banquet is still the best. The best one to dance too, by far. Very cool lyrics.
Wednesday, July 30, 2008
Bread & Butter In D.C.
Had my drink last night, near Q street and 17th (NW). I met a gay man who I ended up talking to forever, and then his boss came in, who said he was straight. I pegged him as Irish and he was. They were suprised and said I had a good eye. We had a lot of fun meeting and then I went home.
Oh, and I got the internship AND a paying job yesterday. Two different things. Oh, and a text for a date with the Latino guy I met who travels. He likes my Spanish. LOL. I left him a msg in Spanish which probably cracked him up. He asked me if I was interested in gettng together and practicing "that wonderful Spanish of yours?"
Si!
Oh, and I got the internship AND a paying job yesterday. Two different things. Oh, and a text for a date with the Latino guy I met who travels. He likes my Spanish. LOL. I left him a msg in Spanish which probably cracked him up. He asked me if I was interested in gettng together and practicing "that wonderful Spanish of yours?"
Si!
Tuesday, July 29, 2008
Toasting The Town (D.C.)
Hmmm. I'm going to need a nom de plume, or whatever it's called. I got hired for a non-profit in D.C. today. Yay! And I can take it with me, as they're flex time and flex travel. I will have to contemplate whether it is a good idea for my name to be connected to the organization...I don't want to be anything but an asset.
After my interview (and, by the way, my boss is a like a charismatic speaking genius) I was stopped in my tracks by an aspiring diplomat with middle eastern roots. I'm becoming a middle east magnet. Yay! And we're going to hear live jazz very soon.
I believe my quest for weed will be over very soon. D.C. is a combination town. Conservative, moreso than I would have thought, where almost everything still closes on a Sunday, but weed is in abundance. Oh, and the Mayflower. Let me tell you something...The Mayflower Hotel seems to be guarded almost as heavily as the White House. It's become a historic landmark, what with Spitzer and call girls and all. I passed by at noon and every man within sight was looking me up and down, wondering, I guess, or, perhaps, reminiscing wistfully of days bygone. I did see a few flushed young and pretty women leaving with a man on her arm, but I suspect this is more from the idea she could be suspect.
I really did wonder at all of the very good looking businessmen crowding that particular corner of the street. I was searched more closely at that junction than when I passed security guards by the White House.
I've no idea why.
I've had many adventures here. Good luck too. I've had $100 worth of Metro passes given to me, and then, after receiving this, have been let through without having to even use them, by transportation authorities.
This morning, a gentleman offered me a free computer, but I don't have it yet. He deals in Apple computers. Just my luck this was the man I flagged down for a ride to the Metro station after having to wait too long for a bus.
I've been offered free housing, and free food, and even free weed today too.
I'm not even young and cute anymore!!!
I'm just happy and friendly. My roommate said to me, "You're a really, really, nice person. You're friendly, and you're easygoing. But you have some DRAMA sweetie. Your situation is DRAMA man." He says it's not my fault. I'm so nice and yet my situation is terrible.
I'm going to have a drink in D.C. tonight. I haven't done that yet. I need to toast the town, make it official.
And I may leave for awhile, in the near future, but I know I'll be back.
After my interview (and, by the way, my boss is a like a charismatic speaking genius) I was stopped in my tracks by an aspiring diplomat with middle eastern roots. I'm becoming a middle east magnet. Yay! And we're going to hear live jazz very soon.
I believe my quest for weed will be over very soon. D.C. is a combination town. Conservative, moreso than I would have thought, where almost everything still closes on a Sunday, but weed is in abundance. Oh, and the Mayflower. Let me tell you something...The Mayflower Hotel seems to be guarded almost as heavily as the White House. It's become a historic landmark, what with Spitzer and call girls and all. I passed by at noon and every man within sight was looking me up and down, wondering, I guess, or, perhaps, reminiscing wistfully of days bygone. I did see a few flushed young and pretty women leaving with a man on her arm, but I suspect this is more from the idea she could be suspect.
I really did wonder at all of the very good looking businessmen crowding that particular corner of the street. I was searched more closely at that junction than when I passed security guards by the White House.
I've no idea why.
I've had many adventures here. Good luck too. I've had $100 worth of Metro passes given to me, and then, after receiving this, have been let through without having to even use them, by transportation authorities.
This morning, a gentleman offered me a free computer, but I don't have it yet. He deals in Apple computers. Just my luck this was the man I flagged down for a ride to the Metro station after having to wait too long for a bus.
I've been offered free housing, and free food, and even free weed today too.
I'm not even young and cute anymore!!!
I'm just happy and friendly. My roommate said to me, "You're a really, really, nice person. You're friendly, and you're easygoing. But you have some DRAMA sweetie. Your situation is DRAMA man." He says it's not my fault. I'm so nice and yet my situation is terrible.
I'm going to have a drink in D.C. tonight. I haven't done that yet. I need to toast the town, make it official.
And I may leave for awhile, in the near future, but I know I'll be back.
Monday, July 28, 2008
Criminalization Of Use Of Marijuana
What should be criminal is withholding the right medicine from the people who need it.
Doctors should be using weed as a first line of treatment and to do otherwise is contrary to the best interests of our country.
I did the research. And I've tried it, after trying everything else. I highly, highly recommend migraine sufferers find a discreet way to try this for themselves. Read about it first if you like. It works.
Before, I did a two month experiment and then quit. I had already quit long before I worked for the oil refinery. And I didn't smoke while I worked there, at all. It had been over a month or more. I only smoked for two months, and on principle, that I'd discovered it works, I quit. I tried the Migranol instead.
Last month would make month #3 where I tried it and it worked. So far, there has been a consistent success rate.
Doctors should be using weed as a first line of treatment and to do otherwise is contrary to the best interests of our country.
I did the research. And I've tried it, after trying everything else. I highly, highly recommend migraine sufferers find a discreet way to try this for themselves. Read about it first if you like. It works.
Before, I did a two month experiment and then quit. I had already quit long before I worked for the oil refinery. And I didn't smoke while I worked there, at all. It had been over a month or more. I only smoked for two months, and on principle, that I'd discovered it works, I quit. I tried the Migranol instead.
Last month would make month #3 where I tried it and it worked. So far, there has been a consistent success rate.
Medicinal Marijuana Testimonial On Migraine, Again
Great. I'm getting a migraine and I don't have any weed.
My last migraine period I was totally out of Migranol, which doesn't help much anyway. I smoked a few inhales (about 4-5) with people in Albuquerque, NM and took about 1/16th of a joint with me to abort my next migraine or try to inhale a bit before I was due.
Guess what? I didn't have a migraine!!! I did not have a migraine before my period, but I got one a week later, when my normal course of period would have been over (even though I wasn't having a normal period...example, no period for days but still the after-period migraine came at the same time, as if I were having a normal period) but it was very, very, light. I didn't know what my new roommate would think of me smoking even a tiny bit and I couldn't sleep bc of the migraine so I, GET THIS, I didn't want to wake him up by opening the door and stepping outside to smoke (and I didn't have a lighter), so I put it in my mouth, chewed it up with the wrapper and everything, and ate it. It was DISGUSTING but it seemed to help a little and within a half hour I fell asleep and didn't have migraine the next day.
So the little bit of weed AGAIN fully prevented my first migraine, and greatly reduced the after-period migraine. I have to make this known publicly, because this is a TRAVESTY that the federal government doesn't have this legalized yet. COME ON U.S.A! Do we want to be left behind in the dust?!!! in the scientific community?
Anyway, I ate the last bit of weed I had and haven't smoked or found (or asked around) since then. Now I'm getting one that's trying to break through. I don't even need a half of a joint. It takes, for me, about 1/8 of a joint to prevent and abort a month's worth of migraines. Which is really incredible.
It's illegal here in Maryland I think. But who is going to make a fuss? I am so excited to find this totally works, and I want all migraine sufferers to be able to try it, and have it prescribed LEGALLY.
Believe me, if I'd known about this, I would have done it 10 years ago. But when certain people were claiming I was "drug-seeking" I never was. I've never done any drug in my life except marijuana, and THIS, only after my son was taken from me and I was in Blaine, after Canada. That's it.
I'm a total advocate for passing a bill or changing the law. People who work for the DEA have to know people, personally, who suffer from migraine. What about the FBI? and the states? don't they know people who have migraines? I guess triptans work for some, but it doesn't prevent migraine. For me, marijuna almost completely prevents my migraine and aborts them so I'm fully functional.
Even my migraine right now, which I think is a migraine, but maybe it's just tension bc it seems too soon for me to have another migraine, is light.
1/8th of a joint a month.
How is this criminal in any way? for a legitimate medical reason? and the cost? it's so cost-effective.
If I had health insurance, I'd try to stay legal, and use remedies that don't even work right, until I could do mj legally. But I don't have health insurance. Also, if I were in a state that allowed permits, I would do that, but I'm not currently in such a state. Which is exactly why the federal government should take the initiative and change the law, so it doesn't matter which state you live in.
I'd like to know if any state, or the government has a better solution for me. I've tried everything else. So am I supposed to just suffer? just because of an archaic and unreasonable law? and be stigmatized when this is harmless and HELPS me?
Who, in their right mind, would argue this is wrong? I cannot be accused of being an addict when I inhale only a couple of puffs a MONTH and it prevents migraine, and I'm not showing up at ER anywhere.
My last migraine period I was totally out of Migranol, which doesn't help much anyway. I smoked a few inhales (about 4-5) with people in Albuquerque, NM and took about 1/16th of a joint with me to abort my next migraine or try to inhale a bit before I was due.
Guess what? I didn't have a migraine!!! I did not have a migraine before my period, but I got one a week later, when my normal course of period would have been over (even though I wasn't having a normal period...example, no period for days but still the after-period migraine came at the same time, as if I were having a normal period) but it was very, very, light. I didn't know what my new roommate would think of me smoking even a tiny bit and I couldn't sleep bc of the migraine so I, GET THIS, I didn't want to wake him up by opening the door and stepping outside to smoke (and I didn't have a lighter), so I put it in my mouth, chewed it up with the wrapper and everything, and ate it. It was DISGUSTING but it seemed to help a little and within a half hour I fell asleep and didn't have migraine the next day.
So the little bit of weed AGAIN fully prevented my first migraine, and greatly reduced the after-period migraine. I have to make this known publicly, because this is a TRAVESTY that the federal government doesn't have this legalized yet. COME ON U.S.A! Do we want to be left behind in the dust?!!! in the scientific community?
Anyway, I ate the last bit of weed I had and haven't smoked or found (or asked around) since then. Now I'm getting one that's trying to break through. I don't even need a half of a joint. It takes, for me, about 1/8 of a joint to prevent and abort a month's worth of migraines. Which is really incredible.
It's illegal here in Maryland I think. But who is going to make a fuss? I am so excited to find this totally works, and I want all migraine sufferers to be able to try it, and have it prescribed LEGALLY.
Believe me, if I'd known about this, I would have done it 10 years ago. But when certain people were claiming I was "drug-seeking" I never was. I've never done any drug in my life except marijuana, and THIS, only after my son was taken from me and I was in Blaine, after Canada. That's it.
I'm a total advocate for passing a bill or changing the law. People who work for the DEA have to know people, personally, who suffer from migraine. What about the FBI? and the states? don't they know people who have migraines? I guess triptans work for some, but it doesn't prevent migraine. For me, marijuna almost completely prevents my migraine and aborts them so I'm fully functional.
Even my migraine right now, which I think is a migraine, but maybe it's just tension bc it seems too soon for me to have another migraine, is light.
1/8th of a joint a month.
How is this criminal in any way? for a legitimate medical reason? and the cost? it's so cost-effective.
If I had health insurance, I'd try to stay legal, and use remedies that don't even work right, until I could do mj legally. But I don't have health insurance. Also, if I were in a state that allowed permits, I would do that, but I'm not currently in such a state. Which is exactly why the federal government should take the initiative and change the law, so it doesn't matter which state you live in.
I'd like to know if any state, or the government has a better solution for me. I've tried everything else. So am I supposed to just suffer? just because of an archaic and unreasonable law? and be stigmatized when this is harmless and HELPS me?
Who, in their right mind, would argue this is wrong? I cannot be accused of being an addict when I inhale only a couple of puffs a MONTH and it prevents migraine, and I'm not showing up at ER anywhere.
Russ Radi
I'm pretty sure the Canadian immigration guy I talked to was Russ Radi. It's close to Radavi, but different and I don't believe there is any connection at all.
Radavi
Also, I'd like to know who Ben Radavi is exactly.
I dated him briefly, before I moved to Washington and a law enforcement person said to me, "Do you KNOW who he is?" or maybe he said, who his Dad was. I said no, and I didn't. Why would someone in a government job approach me and ASK me if I knew, if it wasn't significant?
I knew he showed me a photo of his former girlfriend who was still at St. Andrew's prep school in Scotland, and that he was planning to go back to Scotland to see her, but I didn't know more. He was some middle eastern heritage and said his father was on the computer all the time. That's all I knew.
Radavi was the last name.
I dated him briefly, before I moved to Washington and a law enforcement person said to me, "Do you KNOW who he is?" or maybe he said, who his Dad was. I said no, and I didn't. Why would someone in a government job approach me and ASK me if I knew, if it wasn't significant?
I knew he showed me a photo of his former girlfriend who was still at St. Andrew's prep school in Scotland, and that he was planning to go back to Scotland to see her, but I didn't know more. He was some middle eastern heritage and said his father was on the computer all the time. That's all I knew.
Radavi was the last name.
Motive (?): Things I Reported Prior To Electromagnetic/Radiation Exposure
I've been thinking about anyone and everyone I could have angered or made mad prior to what began to happen with me and my son. I've already listed the possibility of some fringe Catholic group (just an extremist group), or the FBI or someone within law enforcement after I reported the FBI employees in Oregon. There were a few others though.
The car vandalisms were so bad, and I had officers in Wenatchee tell me to move away from the area. No one else in my neighborhood had the constant vandalisms that I did.
I reported Judge Warren to Wes with the Wenatchee FBI for unethical judicial practices (refusing to file kites and telling his clerks not to file anything, for one).
When I had to look for new housing for me and my son, I went to a Russian restaurant in town, owned by a couple who had emigrated here. I met with them right after the thing with Alexander Litvinenko happened in England, where he was poisoned and died, withering away in a hospital and blaming the Russian government. I brought it up to the man, just for conversation, and I said it was scary and this man looked at me hard and said, "He should have kept his mouth SHUT" and then went on to defend the killing of this journalist. I thought perhaps it was just "talk" but the sincerity he had scared me. He told me he had relatives and brothers that would "take care of people" who got in the way. So I actually called or emailed (I don't remember which) the CIA and made a report. I said I didn't know much about them but that I was concerned about why they were in the states with such opinions which could just be random, or NOT. This couple had a disabled son whom they introduced me to after I had bragged about how smart my son was. Their son was totally autistic or mentally retarded and was a grown man. Very sweet, but I could tell they didn't like me after I had been bragging about how smart my son was and how he was hitting his milestones so in advance. I told them I thought he was sort of a genuis because of the things he'd been doing and I had confirmed his abilities were unusual with other parents of exceptionally gifted children online, and through reading about milestones. I documented all my sons milestones. So here I'd been bragging, and made a misstep of offending by bringing up Boris. I can't rmeember the guys last name but I'll look it up. (it wasn't Boris, Alexander Litvinenko)At any rate, after I reported to the CIA, shortly after this, the stuff began to happen to me and my son. And then after it was already going on, I saw the Russian guy's wife following me to the library in E.Wenatchee one day and she just observed me and smirked smugly. I had a really bad feeling about it. That was the only time I ran into her. But she just stared and stared, and smirked, and looked over at my son. I told Christa Schneider about what had happened, I remember, or about my conversation with them. I also told her about contacting the Protestant Irish militias. She asked me for all the details about this and shortly after, was asking where my son and I slept, near a window and which one in the house, etc. Also asked me how I least wanted to die and I said death didn't frighten me, but torture did.
I also contacted the Protestant version of "militia" from Ireland, just the Orange order and a few others, Ulster something or other, asking what I should do given my constant car vandalisms and problems which began after I first reported the higher ranking officials at the RCC Abbey. I wasn't joining a militia or giving them support in any way, but I knew my son and I needed protection and felt we were in danger and no one was listening to me. They were telling me to "move" but to where? I'd already moved and I was easily found and the same stuff was happening there. So I don't know, if someone thought I was a Protestant militia or something, would they go after my son and I? The thing is, I tend to think the militias, Protestant or Catholic, don't go after civilians unless they're heaviliy involved in stuff. And I wasn't and am not. I questioned all the propoganda and efforts to smear me by certain members in the Catholic church, and I knew some group had been doing the car vandalisms since I reported...I also had my house broken into and, for example, in Oregon, only my MEDICAL RECORDS were stolen ??? What kind of robber only takes medical records? I had a huge stack and told a couple friends about it and how I was going to get a P.I. lawyer for the hit-and-run which damaged my knee, and then use some of the money to get a lawyer to sue the Mt. Angel Abbey for civil rights violations.
Also, I told my friends, RIGHT before I "met" these FBI employees at the federal courthouse in Portland, Oregon, that my goal was to finish well in college (I was improving upon my GPA, which was then at 3.6), apply to a top-tier law school, get my license, and then apply to the FBI through the lawyer referral program. My objective was to fight corporate crime from the inside, with government money, because I was told, by lawyers, that it's extremely difficult to be a civil rights attorney without being independently wealthy. I wasn't independently wealthy. So if money was needed to fight for people's rights, I thought it would be good to have government backing. Only problem is, I told my friends, some who were not friends I later discovered, that one of the things I wanted to do, was try to reverse church standing as privileged organizations to the same rules and regulations which apply to regular business corporations. I also wanted to hold clergy accountable under RICO, from any church religion (Protestant, Catholic, Mormon, Jewish, Muslim, Etc) for child abuse and other things. I felt it had been wrong not to treat these crimes as crimes, and organizaed crimes by the very fact there was clear obstruction of justice, fraud, and manipulation of others, across state lines and even country boundaries. There was already a team of attorneys making this argument, headed under a Mr. Anderson, who was actually even naming the Vatican, but it was more of a longshot. On this count, though, I wasn't just wanting to go aftr the RCC, but ANY and EVERY church which tried to escape accountability by hiding under their religious privileges and excuses. I also wanted to go after Enrons and white collar corporate crime, because of the vast damage it does to countless private citizens and the common good. White collar crime isn't prosecuted in the same way petty theives are, and white collar criminals fight back, with money and power and often win their own cases. I want life to be fair. For everyone. It's not, but I wanted to make a difference and try.
These are the things which were going on, besides state problems, immediately prior to what happened to me and my son. I don't know exactly who did it, but it happened. And more than one group or person could have had motive and means.
Believe me.
I had also been bragging about my son and all his accomplishments, through tons of email, to Christa Schneider, and I told her over the phone that I thought my son was going to grow up with a strong will like me, and that he was so smart, and loved me so much, when he was older and found out what had been done to me, through the harassment, criminal use of police by church, and defamation (newspaper article), that he would defend me and people would know, as my own son lived with me, there was nothing wrong with me. I said I thought my son might follow in my footsteps and be an activist, but that I didn't care what he did as long as he was happy. By that time, I knew things weren't adding up with my friendship with this woman who kept pressuring me to send her my "book" about what happened with the RCC and how she'd edit it for me, and how after I spoke with her about my FBI interest, I was meeting FBI who were also Catholic and then got into my house and assaulted me. So, I was laying it on thick, sending email after email about what my son was doing now, and how bright he was. I bragged about him and nothing else, and did it intentionally, to annoy. The thing is, with Schneider, I would give info to her and then something would happen when she was the only one I told. For example, I told her I was filing an important motion at the bankruptcy court (Archdiocese bankruptcy) and what time I was going (bc she'd ask) and then when I got there, there was a service guy for the Catholic church lawyers, WAITING for me, and then slapping me with a motion, saying "you're served" before I could file, to prevent me from getting my thing filed first. How did HE know I was going to be there? I only told her. Things were happening like this all the time. Another thing, when I met the FBI guy I first met, it was at a federal courthouse I'd told Schneider I was planning to walk over to, if I lost a hearing at the state district courthouse (which was across the street). I told her if I lost, I was walking straight over to the federal courthouse and going up the elevator to file. The FBI guy came in after me, not before. He came in after me, but moved ahead of me so that he was BEFORE me in line. After he got through security first, he waited to see which direction I was going and went the same way and then he followed me up to the floor where I was headed.
I met the FBI guys after I dated (very briefly) Mike Tancer, a guy I'd met whose family has a winery in CA (Ironhorse is the name). I'd told Mike about my interest in the FBI and he asked me if I was FBI. I told him no, but I wanted to work as a lawyer for the FBI. I was telling Schneider the same thing, but told her my objectives, and didn't tell Mike this. It was shortly after dating Mike Tancer that I met the FBI guys.
I had an FBI business card, from Raul Bujanda, the agent I met in the federal courthouse. Bujanda wrote 3 numbers on the back of his card: cell, business, and home. He asked me to call him and to go out. I said okay, and didn't know he was married. I found out about that later, after I'd reported him to the FBI for what he and his "boss", Armando Garza did (which I haven't written about yet). I had that business card on my windowsill in my kitchen. I didn't move it or take it anywhere. After I reported him to the FBI, it disappeared one day later. I couldn't tell anyone had been in my house at all. It was absolutely undisturbed, except the business card was gone. Not that the waitresses couldn't have confirmed where we had all been the night before. I was out with them, and they were really FBI, but the business card disappeared. Only the FBI or someone working on behalf of Bujanda and Garza would have motive to do this.
I was doing this at the same time I met the Russian couple, contacted CIA, and wrote Irish militia.
I made someone mad.
And what happened, HAPPENED. This post is absolutely true, as much as my TTSOML posts.
I swear the above statement is true and is made to the best of my belief and knowledge, and is subject to penalty for perjury in a court of law, and may be used as evidence.
The car vandalisms were so bad, and I had officers in Wenatchee tell me to move away from the area. No one else in my neighborhood had the constant vandalisms that I did.
I reported Judge Warren to Wes with the Wenatchee FBI for unethical judicial practices (refusing to file kites and telling his clerks not to file anything, for one).
When I had to look for new housing for me and my son, I went to a Russian restaurant in town, owned by a couple who had emigrated here. I met with them right after the thing with Alexander Litvinenko happened in England, where he was poisoned and died, withering away in a hospital and blaming the Russian government. I brought it up to the man, just for conversation, and I said it was scary and this man looked at me hard and said, "He should have kept his mouth SHUT" and then went on to defend the killing of this journalist. I thought perhaps it was just "talk" but the sincerity he had scared me. He told me he had relatives and brothers that would "take care of people" who got in the way. So I actually called or emailed (I don't remember which) the CIA and made a report. I said I didn't know much about them but that I was concerned about why they were in the states with such opinions which could just be random, or NOT. This couple had a disabled son whom they introduced me to after I had bragged about how smart my son was. Their son was totally autistic or mentally retarded and was a grown man. Very sweet, but I could tell they didn't like me after I had been bragging about how smart my son was and how he was hitting his milestones so in advance. I told them I thought he was sort of a genuis because of the things he'd been doing and I had confirmed his abilities were unusual with other parents of exceptionally gifted children online, and through reading about milestones. I documented all my sons milestones. So here I'd been bragging, and made a misstep of offending by bringing up Boris. I can't rmeember the guys last name but I'll look it up. (it wasn't Boris, Alexander Litvinenko)At any rate, after I reported to the CIA, shortly after this, the stuff began to happen to me and my son. And then after it was already going on, I saw the Russian guy's wife following me to the library in E.Wenatchee one day and she just observed me and smirked smugly. I had a really bad feeling about it. That was the only time I ran into her. But she just stared and stared, and smirked, and looked over at my son. I told Christa Schneider about what had happened, I remember, or about my conversation with them. I also told her about contacting the Protestant Irish militias. She asked me for all the details about this and shortly after, was asking where my son and I slept, near a window and which one in the house, etc. Also asked me how I least wanted to die and I said death didn't frighten me, but torture did.
I also contacted the Protestant version of "militia" from Ireland, just the Orange order and a few others, Ulster something or other, asking what I should do given my constant car vandalisms and problems which began after I first reported the higher ranking officials at the RCC Abbey. I wasn't joining a militia or giving them support in any way, but I knew my son and I needed protection and felt we were in danger and no one was listening to me. They were telling me to "move" but to where? I'd already moved and I was easily found and the same stuff was happening there. So I don't know, if someone thought I was a Protestant militia or something, would they go after my son and I? The thing is, I tend to think the militias, Protestant or Catholic, don't go after civilians unless they're heaviliy involved in stuff. And I wasn't and am not. I questioned all the propoganda and efforts to smear me by certain members in the Catholic church, and I knew some group had been doing the car vandalisms since I reported...I also had my house broken into and, for example, in Oregon, only my MEDICAL RECORDS were stolen ??? What kind of robber only takes medical records? I had a huge stack and told a couple friends about it and how I was going to get a P.I. lawyer for the hit-and-run which damaged my knee, and then use some of the money to get a lawyer to sue the Mt. Angel Abbey for civil rights violations.
Also, I told my friends, RIGHT before I "met" these FBI employees at the federal courthouse in Portland, Oregon, that my goal was to finish well in college (I was improving upon my GPA, which was then at 3.6), apply to a top-tier law school, get my license, and then apply to the FBI through the lawyer referral program. My objective was to fight corporate crime from the inside, with government money, because I was told, by lawyers, that it's extremely difficult to be a civil rights attorney without being independently wealthy. I wasn't independently wealthy. So if money was needed to fight for people's rights, I thought it would be good to have government backing. Only problem is, I told my friends, some who were not friends I later discovered, that one of the things I wanted to do, was try to reverse church standing as privileged organizations to the same rules and regulations which apply to regular business corporations. I also wanted to hold clergy accountable under RICO, from any church religion (Protestant, Catholic, Mormon, Jewish, Muslim, Etc) for child abuse and other things. I felt it had been wrong not to treat these crimes as crimes, and organizaed crimes by the very fact there was clear obstruction of justice, fraud, and manipulation of others, across state lines and even country boundaries. There was already a team of attorneys making this argument, headed under a Mr. Anderson, who was actually even naming the Vatican, but it was more of a longshot. On this count, though, I wasn't just wanting to go aftr the RCC, but ANY and EVERY church which tried to escape accountability by hiding under their religious privileges and excuses. I also wanted to go after Enrons and white collar corporate crime, because of the vast damage it does to countless private citizens and the common good. White collar crime isn't prosecuted in the same way petty theives are, and white collar criminals fight back, with money and power and often win their own cases. I want life to be fair. For everyone. It's not, but I wanted to make a difference and try.
These are the things which were going on, besides state problems, immediately prior to what happened to me and my son. I don't know exactly who did it, but it happened. And more than one group or person could have had motive and means.
Believe me.
I had also been bragging about my son and all his accomplishments, through tons of email, to Christa Schneider, and I told her over the phone that I thought my son was going to grow up with a strong will like me, and that he was so smart, and loved me so much, when he was older and found out what had been done to me, through the harassment, criminal use of police by church, and defamation (newspaper article), that he would defend me and people would know, as my own son lived with me, there was nothing wrong with me. I said I thought my son might follow in my footsteps and be an activist, but that I didn't care what he did as long as he was happy. By that time, I knew things weren't adding up with my friendship with this woman who kept pressuring me to send her my "book" about what happened with the RCC and how she'd edit it for me, and how after I spoke with her about my FBI interest, I was meeting FBI who were also Catholic and then got into my house and assaulted me. So, I was laying it on thick, sending email after email about what my son was doing now, and how bright he was. I bragged about him and nothing else, and did it intentionally, to annoy. The thing is, with Schneider, I would give info to her and then something would happen when she was the only one I told. For example, I told her I was filing an important motion at the bankruptcy court (Archdiocese bankruptcy) and what time I was going (bc she'd ask) and then when I got there, there was a service guy for the Catholic church lawyers, WAITING for me, and then slapping me with a motion, saying "you're served" before I could file, to prevent me from getting my thing filed first. How did HE know I was going to be there? I only told her. Things were happening like this all the time. Another thing, when I met the FBI guy I first met, it was at a federal courthouse I'd told Schneider I was planning to walk over to, if I lost a hearing at the state district courthouse (which was across the street). I told her if I lost, I was walking straight over to the federal courthouse and going up the elevator to file. The FBI guy came in after me, not before. He came in after me, but moved ahead of me so that he was BEFORE me in line. After he got through security first, he waited to see which direction I was going and went the same way and then he followed me up to the floor where I was headed.
I met the FBI guys after I dated (very briefly) Mike Tancer, a guy I'd met whose family has a winery in CA (Ironhorse is the name). I'd told Mike about my interest in the FBI and he asked me if I was FBI. I told him no, but I wanted to work as a lawyer for the FBI. I was telling Schneider the same thing, but told her my objectives, and didn't tell Mike this. It was shortly after dating Mike Tancer that I met the FBI guys.
I had an FBI business card, from Raul Bujanda, the agent I met in the federal courthouse. Bujanda wrote 3 numbers on the back of his card: cell, business, and home. He asked me to call him and to go out. I said okay, and didn't know he was married. I found out about that later, after I'd reported him to the FBI for what he and his "boss", Armando Garza did (which I haven't written about yet). I had that business card on my windowsill in my kitchen. I didn't move it or take it anywhere. After I reported him to the FBI, it disappeared one day later. I couldn't tell anyone had been in my house at all. It was absolutely undisturbed, except the business card was gone. Not that the waitresses couldn't have confirmed where we had all been the night before. I was out with them, and they were really FBI, but the business card disappeared. Only the FBI or someone working on behalf of Bujanda and Garza would have motive to do this.
I was doing this at the same time I met the Russian couple, contacted CIA, and wrote Irish militia.
I made someone mad.
And what happened, HAPPENED. This post is absolutely true, as much as my TTSOML posts.
I swear the above statement is true and is made to the best of my belief and knowledge, and is subject to penalty for perjury in a court of law, and may be used as evidence.
Intro To Charlie Wilson
Last night, I was kicking back with my roommate and he put in the movie "Charlie Wilson" with Tom Hanks. I hadn't seen it before. It's about a congressman who helps Afghanistan fight against Russia, and pretty much does the fundraising and gains support for the cause through his position.
I didn't realize congressmen could do this sort of thing, or were involved much in international affairs.
I told my roommate how I had wanted to visit all of the embassies in D.C. and he said it's possible. He said he'd take me to them and that he used to be in that area, doing training or security for the Vice President or something. I said I didn't know what I'd do--"Hi everyone!" (?!), but I want to do this before I leave D.C. I'm going to have to leave before I can come back, to fix this thing concerning my son.
If I could work for a non-profit, getting in through an internship, and work with international people, I think that would be fun. I enjoy learning from other cultures and advocating for any type of civil rights issue.
I didn't realize congressmen could do this sort of thing, or were involved much in international affairs.
I told my roommate how I had wanted to visit all of the embassies in D.C. and he said it's possible. He said he'd take me to them and that he used to be in that area, doing training or security for the Vice President or something. I said I didn't know what I'd do--"Hi everyone!" (?!), but I want to do this before I leave D.C. I'm going to have to leave before I can come back, to fix this thing concerning my son.
If I could work for a non-profit, getting in through an internship, and work with international people, I think that would be fun. I enjoy learning from other cultures and advocating for any type of civil rights issue.
Offer For Private Attorney
I was thinking, I've actually guessed 2 passwords in my life (tried and was correct first try). The other one was in Canada. There was a hint on that one though, but it was random too and I just happened to recall someone saying a name once--and I remembered.
Well, I hope my good luck is true, but someone came forward, to be an annonymous donor to pay for a private attorney for my case. Retainer, and all other costs to conclusion. I was sort of shocked.
A private attorney. For me and my son, and a good one too. Costs of travel for me covered too, and tests and diagnostics.
A full-on, serious offer. Finally.
I'll write more of the TTSOML and then I have to be finished, fairly soon.
I may be able to have a chance against the state now, and those who've done harm.
Well, I hope my good luck is true, but someone came forward, to be an annonymous donor to pay for a private attorney for my case. Retainer, and all other costs to conclusion. I was sort of shocked.
A private attorney. For me and my son, and a good one too. Costs of travel for me covered too, and tests and diagnostics.
A full-on, serious offer. Finally.
I'll write more of the TTSOML and then I have to be finished, fairly soon.
I may be able to have a chance against the state now, and those who've done harm.
Sunday, July 27, 2008
D.C. Friends & Intuition
I had my date with the scientist guy. He was from Iran and is a really nice guy but definitely just a friend, I decided. What was funny, was that I guessed something about him, out of the blue, which shook him up a little. His majors were math and science and he is now studying engineering of a particular form of technology to get his PhD. He never told me what his undergrad work was in. So he's talking about probabilities all the time, and then how he likes to spend time brainstorming, and the thought came to my mind, "gametheory". So I asked, "Are you a game theorist?" and he looked at me, with an almost scared look in his eye, and said quickly, "How did you know that?" I said, "I don't know, are you?" and he said yes, and looking at me warily said his master's work had been in game theory and its application to satellite technology.
He believes everything about what happened to me with electromagnetic or radio waves, and said the technology is out there and he knows it's fully possible. He's too afraid to testify on my behalf for my hearing, to talk about it, because he's worried he would get kicked out of the country because he's Iranian and only has his visa. He said it was already difficult to get back in, as a student, from Europe, and that his family in Iran is worried about getting bombed and being attacked every day, and he feels if he made someone mad, they'd just find an excuse to boot him out. They're all really worried the U.S. is going to invade and that Iraq was a stepping stone to get to Iran or something. He believes the U.S. thinks Iran is the #1 enemy right now. So I told him I wouldn't mention his name to anyone.
The other good guess I made happened today. My roommate came home totally drunk from a night out on the town and checked his email and turned off the computer by mistake and went to bed. He usually leaves it on and I don't know the password. He lets me use his computer. So this morning, I was staring at the "enter password" box and thinking, "GREAT" because he'll be in bed until afternoon. So, within 3 minutes a word came to my mind. It's a combination word and isn't something generic. I just thought about things he's interested in and likes, and nicknames he has for different things and one came to mind. I typed it in, and I was RIGHT! First time! I'm through!
Yesterday I met more people from Iran. I like the group in general. Just random meetings, and one offered me a job but has to see if he really can afford to hire, on Monday. So I'm waiting. I have an interview for an internship in D.C. set up as well. AND, on my way back to the Metro station (the train/subway), I ran into a very articulate man who is Latino and who offered me a free place to stay while he's out of the country for a couple of weeks. The conversation began with my asking him how to get to the subway from where I was. I asked him in Spanish. I think he thought it was funny, because I realized later, when he asked what I was doing in town and what my plans were, and I told him I was looking for un apartmento nuevo, I was trying to say, "in exchange for housekeeping, or something". I said something like, apartmento por mi limpia or something and I think the translation was "I want an apartment because I'm clean." Anyway, he laughed out loud. His Spanish was different. I could tell it wasn't Mexican-Spanish and it wasn't. I guessed before he told me. He's in communications. AND I got my first card from a woman. All these contacts from men! But this other woman works for a non-profit. I had someone encourage me to finish my degree out here, online or something.
It's very international here, which I love and then someone said it's bc there are a lot of embassies here. I'd like to visit all of the embassies, but I don't think that's something you can just "do" as a tourist. I am definitely a people-person though.
It's pretty much impossible to get a job in D.C. unless you live here. People want to see you face-to-face and it's about who you know, even if you've only known them for 15 minutes. I didn't realize I've been networking until recently as I wasn't sure what the definition was. It's a lot of fun.
I haven't find housing and friends in the places I've been recently, by being offered money in exchange for sexual services or anything else. It's been all on the up & up.
Recently, I had a man who seems to be interested in me, ask if I was a shoes, clothes, or purse girl. How do I tell him, "Neither. I'm a private attorney girl"? So I'm thinking about the 3 options. Shoes. Hmm. I could use a good pair of running shoes but that's not romantic. He'd want to buy peep-toes. I love clothes and want to go shopping, but without the right shoes, it won't make the outfit. Purses I don't use too much. I could use a laptop carrier. But, since I don't have a purse, maybe I should say purse.
Of course I'm being really careful out here. I use my intuition to the best of my ability.
He believes everything about what happened to me with electromagnetic or radio waves, and said the technology is out there and he knows it's fully possible. He's too afraid to testify on my behalf for my hearing, to talk about it, because he's worried he would get kicked out of the country because he's Iranian and only has his visa. He said it was already difficult to get back in, as a student, from Europe, and that his family in Iran is worried about getting bombed and being attacked every day, and he feels if he made someone mad, they'd just find an excuse to boot him out. They're all really worried the U.S. is going to invade and that Iraq was a stepping stone to get to Iran or something. He believes the U.S. thinks Iran is the #1 enemy right now. So I told him I wouldn't mention his name to anyone.
The other good guess I made happened today. My roommate came home totally drunk from a night out on the town and checked his email and turned off the computer by mistake and went to bed. He usually leaves it on and I don't know the password. He lets me use his computer. So this morning, I was staring at the "enter password" box and thinking, "GREAT" because he'll be in bed until afternoon. So, within 3 minutes a word came to my mind. It's a combination word and isn't something generic. I just thought about things he's interested in and likes, and nicknames he has for different things and one came to mind. I typed it in, and I was RIGHT! First time! I'm through!
Yesterday I met more people from Iran. I like the group in general. Just random meetings, and one offered me a job but has to see if he really can afford to hire, on Monday. So I'm waiting. I have an interview for an internship in D.C. set up as well. AND, on my way back to the Metro station (the train/subway), I ran into a very articulate man who is Latino and who offered me a free place to stay while he's out of the country for a couple of weeks. The conversation began with my asking him how to get to the subway from where I was. I asked him in Spanish. I think he thought it was funny, because I realized later, when he asked what I was doing in town and what my plans were, and I told him I was looking for un apartmento nuevo, I was trying to say, "in exchange for housekeeping, or something". I said something like, apartmento por mi limpia or something and I think the translation was "I want an apartment because I'm clean." Anyway, he laughed out loud. His Spanish was different. I could tell it wasn't Mexican-Spanish and it wasn't. I guessed before he told me. He's in communications. AND I got my first card from a woman. All these contacts from men! But this other woman works for a non-profit. I had someone encourage me to finish my degree out here, online or something.
It's very international here, which I love and then someone said it's bc there are a lot of embassies here. I'd like to visit all of the embassies, but I don't think that's something you can just "do" as a tourist. I am definitely a people-person though.
It's pretty much impossible to get a job in D.C. unless you live here. People want to see you face-to-face and it's about who you know, even if you've only known them for 15 minutes. I didn't realize I've been networking until recently as I wasn't sure what the definition was. It's a lot of fun.
I haven't find housing and friends in the places I've been recently, by being offered money in exchange for sexual services or anything else. It's been all on the up & up.
Recently, I had a man who seems to be interested in me, ask if I was a shoes, clothes, or purse girl. How do I tell him, "Neither. I'm a private attorney girl"? So I'm thinking about the 3 options. Shoes. Hmm. I could use a good pair of running shoes but that's not romantic. He'd want to buy peep-toes. I love clothes and want to go shopping, but without the right shoes, it won't make the outfit. Purses I don't use too much. I could use a laptop carrier. But, since I don't have a purse, maybe I should say purse.
Of course I'm being really careful out here. I use my intuition to the best of my ability.
Friday, July 25, 2008
TTSOML #58: Hit-and-Run
At the same time I was trying to find a new lawyer, I was trying to get help for my knee which was injured in the hit-and-run auto collision. The other car had hit my car after running a red light and had rammed into the passenger side and corner of the hood part of my car. I'd been making a legal left turn and witnesses verified I was in the right. The driver was laughing and looking in my window at me as he backed up, and then sped off, across a parking lot. He probably never would have been caught, had his LICENSE plate not fallen off upon impact, left behind for the police.
This guy thought he was in the clear, and he took off so fast, no one got a plate number. They just saw it fall off.
My car was pushed and came to a stop upon impact. I tried to turn out of the way, but he was going too fast. On impact, my left knee hit the dash underneath and I had severe whiplash. I was wearing a seatbelt. It was a very bad impact and my door was stuck all the way on the other side, because of the impact. My car was later declared totaled. I tried to drive it later and when it was examined, it was determined to be totaled.
I didn't want to get out of the car, but someone came over and tried to get me out. So I limped out. When the ambulance came, I debated whether or not to go to ER. My knee was popping weirdly and hurt, but I was still in shock. I said no, I'd go home and change my mind if needed, later.
I called my friend Christa Schneider and told her what had happened. I also called my insurance company. After about a half hour or hour, I began having an extremely painful burning sensation in my pubic bone region. It wasn't the whole pelvis, just the bone, and tingling that went down my left thigh, on the same leg where my left knee was popping and beginning to hurt more. It got so bad, I asked my roommate to take my to the hospital. I told Christa I was going to go to St. Vincents. So we went. When I got there, I told them what happened. No one would take an X-ray of my pelvis. She examined me, and said I could go home. It was my pubic bone that hurt more than my knee at the time. I thought maybe my knee would "pop back in" or something. I didn't know.
Everything got worse. My knee started giving out underneath me. I would be walking, and BAM, down. It was true "giving way". I told my friend about it and that I was going to another hospital to have it X-rayed. Which is when the doctor took 3 views but only showed me 2 of those 3 views. I didn't even know he'd taken 3 views until I later obtained the records, because he didn't say anything--he just put 2 views up on the screen and pointed to them and said nothing was there.
A week to month later, I was at the same place, insisting I wasn't okay. It hurt all the time. I was by then in college at Portland State University.
I really need my timeline out. Because there is so much, and dates are needed to show exactly what was happening when. Because sometimes many things were happening at once.
This guy thought he was in the clear, and he took off so fast, no one got a plate number. They just saw it fall off.
My car was pushed and came to a stop upon impact. I tried to turn out of the way, but he was going too fast. On impact, my left knee hit the dash underneath and I had severe whiplash. I was wearing a seatbelt. It was a very bad impact and my door was stuck all the way on the other side, because of the impact. My car was later declared totaled. I tried to drive it later and when it was examined, it was determined to be totaled.
I didn't want to get out of the car, but someone came over and tried to get me out. So I limped out. When the ambulance came, I debated whether or not to go to ER. My knee was popping weirdly and hurt, but I was still in shock. I said no, I'd go home and change my mind if needed, later.
I called my friend Christa Schneider and told her what had happened. I also called my insurance company. After about a half hour or hour, I began having an extremely painful burning sensation in my pubic bone region. It wasn't the whole pelvis, just the bone, and tingling that went down my left thigh, on the same leg where my left knee was popping and beginning to hurt more. It got so bad, I asked my roommate to take my to the hospital. I told Christa I was going to go to St. Vincents. So we went. When I got there, I told them what happened. No one would take an X-ray of my pelvis. She examined me, and said I could go home. It was my pubic bone that hurt more than my knee at the time. I thought maybe my knee would "pop back in" or something. I didn't know.
Everything got worse. My knee started giving out underneath me. I would be walking, and BAM, down. It was true "giving way". I told my friend about it and that I was going to another hospital to have it X-rayed. Which is when the doctor took 3 views but only showed me 2 of those 3 views. I didn't even know he'd taken 3 views until I later obtained the records, because he didn't say anything--he just put 2 views up on the screen and pointed to them and said nothing was there.
A week to month later, I was at the same place, insisting I wasn't okay. It hurt all the time. I was by then in college at Portland State University.
I really need my timeline out. Because there is so much, and dates are needed to show exactly what was happening when. Because sometimes many things were happening at once.
TTSOML #57: Finding A New Lawyer After Gatti
In Oregon, many plaintiffs of clergy abuse cases were having one of the torts dismissed--that of vicarious liability of the Archdiocese to parishes, religious schools, monasteries, and the workers of the aforementioned.
After I quit Gatti's services, I began to research what was going on for myself, with other cases. At first, it was minimal. I figured I'd just hire another P.I. attorney. It was too difficult to find one after I reported Gatti to the Bar. It was very clear that Dan Gatti had some very important legal friends in Oregon, and, I also discovered, he had his detractors. Some of the lawyers began to mutter under their breath when I brought Gatti up. With Gatti, you either thought he was a darling or a scoundrel. I found out, from more than one attorney, that Gatti was a "darling of the Bar". Which was made clear to me by their hard work in trying to justify what he'd done to me.
I went to several attorneys, who wanted my case until they found out I'd reported Gatti to the Bar. So I knew I had a case. I was very shocked by how many lawyers were clearly AFRAID to take my case, or any case against the Catholic church. There was a palpable fear emanating from them and some would even become flustered and say, "Do you UNDERSTAND?! that's the Catholic church!" I got tired of hearing, over and over, how "powerful" the Catholic church was. How "they've been doing this kind of thing for years". How "they would bury me in paper" and the like. I thought to myself, "What a bunch of wimps." I couldn't believe so many were actually afraid to hold clergy of the Catholic church accountable. The fact that my case involved police officers who'd been used against me probably didn't help to reduce the fear level. I didn't realize some of these lawyers were more aware of the mafia type of behavior which has been used by this church, or certain groups or people within this church. I just thought of them as any other organization or corporation which should be held accountable. I kept hearing, "They've been doing this for thousands of years" and I thought, "Yeah, because no one is doing anything about it." The more I heard fear expressed, the more I was determined NOT to be afraid but to treat them like any other organization. I kept getting lawyers who were very interested in what happened to me, who believed strongly that I had a case, but who felt ill-equipped to fight it, if they weren't afraid outright. I got a lot of referrals to David Slader and other preeminent attorneys in the area who took clergy abuse cases. But the main form of clergy abuse Slader and the others were interested in, was child abuse. I also found that later, the plaintiffs attorneys, along with the attorneys for the church, would try to isolate child sex abuse as the only actions which fit the description of "clergy abuse".
Oh, I need to back up a little bit. I need to go back to when I was in the meeting with Dan and Greg and how, at the end, I gave them some information they weren't excited I had, about the monks of Mt. Angel Abbey. I had gone to the official tax records and property records of the Mt. Angel Abbey. These were located in a building across the street from the Salem, Oregon courthouse. I made copies of all the property records, and was planning to give them to Gatti, as a favor. What was bizarre was that after the meeting with Greg, Dan asked him to obtain these records for him. I said to Gatti, "Oh, I already have them. I just got them today," and I dug into my bag and produced a small stack of papers. They both looked at me and instead of being excited their work had been done for them, they seemed annoyed or something. I also told them, "Guess what I found out--Fr. Joachim had a large tract of property in HIS name, and after I reported him, he left the Abbey for the East Coast." It meant, possibly, that damages from Fr. Joachim could come from this piece of property.
So Gatti and Smith were not excited about this. Which I thought was strange. It was like they didn't appreciate my knowing these things.
So, I was also shocked when most of the plaintiffs attorneys for victims of clergy abuse, attempted, on their own, to narrow down the description of "abuse" to mean sexual abuse of children and that was it. There was at least one case of abuse against a child which was mental and retaliatory, and yet they tried to push this case out. There are also countless stories and documentation of abuse of women who go to clergy for counseling and who are exploited and taken advantage of, where a professional uses the trust he's gained, for self-interest. It's no different from the kind of abuse which takes place when a psychologist attempts to romance and seduce and bed his client, whether it's in the client's best interest or not. There are boundaries, and crossing them often amounts to abuse. There is also physical abuse of children, which is not sexual, and abuse of adults. But the plaintiffs attorneys went along with the church in limiting what the potential for damages was. Probably, because the more the claims get spread out and are diffused with different kinds of abuse claims, the LESS money there is to collect from the select few child sex abuse cases the plaintiffs attorneys filed for. The plaintiffs attorneys get a pay-off with larger dividends, and this suits the church, because in exchange, other forms of abuse and hundreds of thousands of other claims get shoved back into the closet or are never given credibility. If the plaintiffs attorneys wanted to define abuse as sexual abuse of children, victims of other forms of abuse wouldn't come forward to file suit. This minimizes the damages to the credibility of the church and their reputations. For every one child that is abused, they have about 100 grown men and women who were raped or abused by clergy.
I went to lawyer after lawyer. When I went to Slader, after I said I hadn't been "touched", he wouldn't take my case but sent me information about counseling for those who suffered from clergy abuse. He sort of acknowledged what had happened was wrong. Other lawyers thought the Section 1983 aspect was the real problem. If they didn't think I had been exploited or abused by clergy, they thought the use of police to cover themselves was egregious and shocking. But they were usually afraid to take my case, because they were worried about retaliation and, basically, their own careers and safety. So they kept hoping a clergy abuse lawyer would take my case but no one did.
It was approaching the statute of limitations when I found Mr. M...
After I quit Gatti's services, I began to research what was going on for myself, with other cases. At first, it was minimal. I figured I'd just hire another P.I. attorney. It was too difficult to find one after I reported Gatti to the Bar. It was very clear that Dan Gatti had some very important legal friends in Oregon, and, I also discovered, he had his detractors. Some of the lawyers began to mutter under their breath when I brought Gatti up. With Gatti, you either thought he was a darling or a scoundrel. I found out, from more than one attorney, that Gatti was a "darling of the Bar". Which was made clear to me by their hard work in trying to justify what he'd done to me.
I went to several attorneys, who wanted my case until they found out I'd reported Gatti to the Bar. So I knew I had a case. I was very shocked by how many lawyers were clearly AFRAID to take my case, or any case against the Catholic church. There was a palpable fear emanating from them and some would even become flustered and say, "Do you UNDERSTAND?! that's the Catholic church!" I got tired of hearing, over and over, how "powerful" the Catholic church was. How "they've been doing this kind of thing for years". How "they would bury me in paper" and the like. I thought to myself, "What a bunch of wimps." I couldn't believe so many were actually afraid to hold clergy of the Catholic church accountable. The fact that my case involved police officers who'd been used against me probably didn't help to reduce the fear level. I didn't realize some of these lawyers were more aware of the mafia type of behavior which has been used by this church, or certain groups or people within this church. I just thought of them as any other organization or corporation which should be held accountable. I kept hearing, "They've been doing this for thousands of years" and I thought, "Yeah, because no one is doing anything about it." The more I heard fear expressed, the more I was determined NOT to be afraid but to treat them like any other organization. I kept getting lawyers who were very interested in what happened to me, who believed strongly that I had a case, but who felt ill-equipped to fight it, if they weren't afraid outright. I got a lot of referrals to David Slader and other preeminent attorneys in the area who took clergy abuse cases. But the main form of clergy abuse Slader and the others were interested in, was child abuse. I also found that later, the plaintiffs attorneys, along with the attorneys for the church, would try to isolate child sex abuse as the only actions which fit the description of "clergy abuse".
Oh, I need to back up a little bit. I need to go back to when I was in the meeting with Dan and Greg and how, at the end, I gave them some information they weren't excited I had, about the monks of Mt. Angel Abbey. I had gone to the official tax records and property records of the Mt. Angel Abbey. These were located in a building across the street from the Salem, Oregon courthouse. I made copies of all the property records, and was planning to give them to Gatti, as a favor. What was bizarre was that after the meeting with Greg, Dan asked him to obtain these records for him. I said to Gatti, "Oh, I already have them. I just got them today," and I dug into my bag and produced a small stack of papers. They both looked at me and instead of being excited their work had been done for them, they seemed annoyed or something. I also told them, "Guess what I found out--Fr. Joachim had a large tract of property in HIS name, and after I reported him, he left the Abbey for the East Coast." It meant, possibly, that damages from Fr. Joachim could come from this piece of property.
So Gatti and Smith were not excited about this. Which I thought was strange. It was like they didn't appreciate my knowing these things.
So, I was also shocked when most of the plaintiffs attorneys for victims of clergy abuse, attempted, on their own, to narrow down the description of "abuse" to mean sexual abuse of children and that was it. There was at least one case of abuse against a child which was mental and retaliatory, and yet they tried to push this case out. There are also countless stories and documentation of abuse of women who go to clergy for counseling and who are exploited and taken advantage of, where a professional uses the trust he's gained, for self-interest. It's no different from the kind of abuse which takes place when a psychologist attempts to romance and seduce and bed his client, whether it's in the client's best interest or not. There are boundaries, and crossing them often amounts to abuse. There is also physical abuse of children, which is not sexual, and abuse of adults. But the plaintiffs attorneys went along with the church in limiting what the potential for damages was. Probably, because the more the claims get spread out and are diffused with different kinds of abuse claims, the LESS money there is to collect from the select few child sex abuse cases the plaintiffs attorneys filed for. The plaintiffs attorneys get a pay-off with larger dividends, and this suits the church, because in exchange, other forms of abuse and hundreds of thousands of other claims get shoved back into the closet or are never given credibility. If the plaintiffs attorneys wanted to define abuse as sexual abuse of children, victims of other forms of abuse wouldn't come forward to file suit. This minimizes the damages to the credibility of the church and their reputations. For every one child that is abused, they have about 100 grown men and women who were raped or abused by clergy.
I went to lawyer after lawyer. When I went to Slader, after I said I hadn't been "touched", he wouldn't take my case but sent me information about counseling for those who suffered from clergy abuse. He sort of acknowledged what had happened was wrong. Other lawyers thought the Section 1983 aspect was the real problem. If they didn't think I had been exploited or abused by clergy, they thought the use of police to cover themselves was egregious and shocking. But they were usually afraid to take my case, because they were worried about retaliation and, basically, their own careers and safety. So they kept hoping a clergy abuse lawyer would take my case but no one did.
It was approaching the statute of limitations when I found Mr. M...
Basic Survival
I went to Canada with $300 in my pocket, and knew no one. I found friends and a place to stay, within days, and a job within 2 weeks.
I was tossed across the border into Blaine, WA with $30 in my pocket. I found housing and friends and work.
I came to Washington D.C. with $200 with me, not knowing anyone. I found friends, housing, and have job possibilities.
I never asked for anything but had these things offered to me. And I owe a lot of people, and remember everyone, and will one day find a way to repay them for their kindnesses. They can also know I have always been a giver when I was able to give and that this will continue in the future.
You do what you have to do, and sometimes, you have to take a risk to acheive what you want to do and where you want to be. People do this all the time, immigrants and refugees especially. It's taking that jump, knowing you are strong enough to land on your feet and believing there are decent people in the world.
Someone who has paranoid schitzophrenia doesn't do this. And I'm not manic. Each decision was calculated. Not having resources doesn't mean you haven't made plans.
There are many different forms of survival. One kind is essential survival, for goods you need (shelter and food) and another kind is emotional survival (finding strength within yourself). There's also survival from traumatic bodily injury and possibility of death.
I've done all these things, and I've become stronger, not weaker, and I never had a breakdown. I made a decision, once, to try to end things because I was sick of what was going on, and being harassed. But it wasn't a "phase" I was in, and it didn't persist. I decided I'd made a bad choice and would never try THAT again, and have never considered it since. That would be a reference to a suicide attempt, which I'll get into, and talk about what led up to that, in my TTSOML posts.
I was tossed across the border into Blaine, WA with $30 in my pocket. I found housing and friends and work.
I came to Washington D.C. with $200 with me, not knowing anyone. I found friends, housing, and have job possibilities.
I never asked for anything but had these things offered to me. And I owe a lot of people, and remember everyone, and will one day find a way to repay them for their kindnesses. They can also know I have always been a giver when I was able to give and that this will continue in the future.
You do what you have to do, and sometimes, you have to take a risk to acheive what you want to do and where you want to be. People do this all the time, immigrants and refugees especially. It's taking that jump, knowing you are strong enough to land on your feet and believing there are decent people in the world.
Someone who has paranoid schitzophrenia doesn't do this. And I'm not manic. Each decision was calculated. Not having resources doesn't mean you haven't made plans.
There are many different forms of survival. One kind is essential survival, for goods you need (shelter and food) and another kind is emotional survival (finding strength within yourself). There's also survival from traumatic bodily injury and possibility of death.
I've done all these things, and I've become stronger, not weaker, and I never had a breakdown. I made a decision, once, to try to end things because I was sick of what was going on, and being harassed. But it wasn't a "phase" I was in, and it didn't persist. I decided I'd made a bad choice and would never try THAT again, and have never considered it since. That would be a reference to a suicide attempt, which I'll get into, and talk about what led up to that, in my TTSOML posts.
How I Got To D.C.
I have to say something about the NIH campus. National Institute of Health or something...Anyway, it's very cool. Probably one of my favorite places. It's huge and a lot of interesting and smart people are milling about, doing research or participating as guinea pigs.
There are so many clinical trials happening over here you could practically part yourself out and become a walking guinea ghost.
I'll bet there are people here like in the movie "Fight Club", where Edward Norton's character just goes to a bunch of self-help clubs and groups for fun. You could ride the experiment-on-me circuit here.
I have one thing to say. Keep an eye on your drink if you're going out with one of these federally funded scientists. ;)
Anyway, people are friendly here. I've had people offer all kinds of things without my asking. I suppose I could land in a foreign country with no resources and be okay, after seeing how I handle Canada, Blaine, and the East Coast. I think I've discovered a talent. It must be that I have a nice face? OR I have angels in disguise helping me and knowing ahead of time where I will be or finding me. I haven't asked for anything, but anything I've received I want to pay back, and one day I will. I know I would be the type to house people who are "passing through" sometime in the future. Like an underground railroad or something.
I've received housing, food, entertainment, and Metro bus tickets, from a variety of people, for nothing. Just friendly people. And directions to free wi-fi places and other helpful tips. I've been given access to very high security sites besides. One guy tried to give me his bike, but I refused to take it because he needed it more than me. My principles are that it's okay to receive if it won't hurt the other person's finances.
Anyway, I had only a couple of hundred dollars on me, a month ago, when I left. I knew why I was leaving, but I didn't know how everything would work out. I just had to have faith, and be smart, and make the right high-risk investments, with the information I had at hand and my limited resources. I didn't know anyone out here--at all. But now I do.
The Christmas song playing now is "If You Just Believe" by Josh Groban. Now they're playing "Drummer Boy". Merry Christmas to me in D.C.!
I don't have a sugar daddy and haven't done anything strange to sustain myself. I guess I've just tried to be me, and have faith. I did have more of a plan of where I would stay, but it fell through, and then on the same evening I was offered something else, randomly.
There are so many clinical trials happening over here you could practically part yourself out and become a walking guinea ghost.
I'll bet there are people here like in the movie "Fight Club", where Edward Norton's character just goes to a bunch of self-help clubs and groups for fun. You could ride the experiment-on-me circuit here.
I have one thing to say. Keep an eye on your drink if you're going out with one of these federally funded scientists. ;)
Anyway, people are friendly here. I've had people offer all kinds of things without my asking. I suppose I could land in a foreign country with no resources and be okay, after seeing how I handle Canada, Blaine, and the East Coast. I think I've discovered a talent. It must be that I have a nice face? OR I have angels in disguise helping me and knowing ahead of time where I will be or finding me. I haven't asked for anything, but anything I've received I want to pay back, and one day I will. I know I would be the type to house people who are "passing through" sometime in the future. Like an underground railroad or something.
I've received housing, food, entertainment, and Metro bus tickets, from a variety of people, for nothing. Just friendly people. And directions to free wi-fi places and other helpful tips. I've been given access to very high security sites besides. One guy tried to give me his bike, but I refused to take it because he needed it more than me. My principles are that it's okay to receive if it won't hurt the other person's finances.
Anyway, I had only a couple of hundred dollars on me, a month ago, when I left. I knew why I was leaving, but I didn't know how everything would work out. I just had to have faith, and be smart, and make the right high-risk investments, with the information I had at hand and my limited resources. I didn't know anyone out here--at all. But now I do.
The Christmas song playing now is "If You Just Believe" by Josh Groban. Now they're playing "Drummer Boy". Merry Christmas to me in D.C.!
I don't have a sugar daddy and haven't done anything strange to sustain myself. I guess I've just tried to be me, and have faith. I did have more of a plan of where I would stay, but it fell through, and then on the same evening I was offered something else, randomly.
Notes From Last Night
From My Notes Last Night...I decided to copy and paste what I wrote and observed last night until I started getting asked to dance. After that, I had to shut the computer down because they were sort of lining up. I took one guy's number just to get dance lessons from him and to meet me in a public place again, for this...Oh, and when I left, one of the guys followed me outside but another one came with and stood watch, to be sure I was safe going home alone. So nice! Thanks to the good guys.
I wish someone would buy me a drink here at this bar. I'm at my own table, not at the bar (which seats 5) and bought my own papuso...I just theought about (omitted) and the movie "Lost in Translation" just came to mind. I wish someone would walk in here and buy me a drink and something to eat. I need to start writing about all the crap of the TTSOML stuff but I'm having a hard time getting there. I need to write this stuff out, here, and then just post it online when I can, but there's something satisfying about hitting that "post" button and doing it instantaneously.
I think I need a drink. This bar is filling up. Everybody is speaking Spanish except the guy right in front of me, who is the only other Caucasian person here, who says to me he's leaving pretty soon.
I think this isn't karaoke. It's this woman's set-up I believe. She looks really good. She's wearing this tiny black dress and is huge on top and has a nice everything else. She's gorgeous. All the women here are voluptuous.
This is sort of a hideaway, I think, from regular DC. I don't imagine a lot of political wrangling happens here. The people here mainly look like regular workers, like I would find in Wenatchee. Probably a little poorer in general. Okay, If I'm going to sit here and take up a table, I should probably start writing things that are important.
Well, I just bombed trying to communicate with some people from Honduras. I apologized for my poor Spanish and tried to explain I know Mexican-Spanish. Okay, this guy in front of me is really comfortable, he's got his foot on the chair in front of him. I don't know if that's okay ? in this culture? maybe it's traditional in some Latin American countries. This guy just had a glass of wine. This other guy just asked if I wanted a cervesa. YES! YES! YES!
Okay, I may be able to write now. I may get distracted though. I really like this song...This guy said it's "bachata". I like it. The guy in front of me doesn't even speak any Spanish. So I'm really wondering about his feet on the chair.
With this music, esta difficiles a concentrar. to concentrate.
It would be really fun to sing songs in Spanish in another country. I would love it.
Okay, I am going to TRY to write something serious to post later. I just sort of forgot where I left off.
Now the guy who bought me the beer really wants me to talk to him. Okay, this is interesting. The guy in front of me is getting another glass of wine. Oh, and I guess he's having dessert. So that's okay. I was wondering what the heck he's doing here because he's so detached. Sort of a voyeur. Well, the woman singing IS gorgeous. Probably just his type.
I wish someone would buy me a drink here at this bar. I'm at my own table, not at the bar (which seats 5) and bought my own papuso...I just theought about (omitted) and the movie "Lost in Translation" just came to mind. I wish someone would walk in here and buy me a drink and something to eat. I need to start writing about all the crap of the TTSOML stuff but I'm having a hard time getting there. I need to write this stuff out, here, and then just post it online when I can, but there's something satisfying about hitting that "post" button and doing it instantaneously.
I think I need a drink. This bar is filling up. Everybody is speaking Spanish except the guy right in front of me, who is the only other Caucasian person here, who says to me he's leaving pretty soon.
I think this isn't karaoke. It's this woman's set-up I believe. She looks really good. She's wearing this tiny black dress and is huge on top and has a nice everything else. She's gorgeous. All the women here are voluptuous.
This is sort of a hideaway, I think, from regular DC. I don't imagine a lot of political wrangling happens here. The people here mainly look like regular workers, like I would find in Wenatchee. Probably a little poorer in general. Okay, If I'm going to sit here and take up a table, I should probably start writing things that are important.
Well, I just bombed trying to communicate with some people from Honduras. I apologized for my poor Spanish and tried to explain I know Mexican-Spanish. Okay, this guy in front of me is really comfortable, he's got his foot on the chair in front of him. I don't know if that's okay ? in this culture? maybe it's traditional in some Latin American countries. This guy just had a glass of wine. This other guy just asked if I wanted a cervesa. YES! YES! YES!
Okay, I may be able to write now. I may get distracted though. I really like this song...This guy said it's "bachata". I like it. The guy in front of me doesn't even speak any Spanish. So I'm really wondering about his feet on the chair.
With this music, esta difficiles a concentrar. to concentrate.
It would be really fun to sing songs in Spanish in another country. I would love it.
Okay, I am going to TRY to write something serious to post later. I just sort of forgot where I left off.
Now the guy who bought me the beer really wants me to talk to him. Okay, this is interesting. The guy in front of me is getting another glass of wine. Oh, and I guess he's having dessert. So that's okay. I was wondering what the heck he's doing here because he's so detached. Sort of a voyeur. Well, the woman singing IS gorgeous. Probably just his type.
To Be Different
Ohmigosh. It IS a radio station! (see last post for reference). The DJ just announced, "Merry Christmas in July!" or something like that. They're seriously playing Christmas songs in July over here. Right now I'm hearing: "Jingle Bells".
This is reeeeeaaaaaallly weird. I think I fit in here. Crap. This could be a problem.
Oh, and by the way, over here, everybody knows someone or at least 5 people who work for the CIA, FBI, ATF, and NSA. It is NO BIG DEAL and no one will accuse you of being delusional if you say so. There's tons of government workers and military here. I thought I'd have to join the military to meet a few good men, but all I had to do was move to Maryland.
Now the song playing is "Santa Claus Is Coming To Town." I kid you not. This is so weird. I wonder if they play the Beach Boys during Christmas, just to be different over here.
This is reeeeeaaaaaallly weird. I think I fit in here. Crap. This could be a problem.
Oh, and by the way, over here, everybody knows someone or at least 5 people who work for the CIA, FBI, ATF, and NSA. It is NO BIG DEAL and no one will accuse you of being delusional if you say so. There's tons of government workers and military here. I thought I'd have to join the military to meet a few good men, but all I had to do was move to Maryland.
Now the song playing is "Santa Claus Is Coming To Town." I kid you not. This is so weird. I wonder if they play the Beach Boys during Christmas, just to be different over here.
Life In DC Area
I'm starting to think people in Maryland walk to the beat of a different drummer. Today I saw a beautiful woman walking down the sidewalk in 90 degree weather, with a sleeveless shirt on...and a SILK scarf wrapped around her neck. I have been sitting in a deli where they've been playing Christmas music for the last 2 hours and I think it's a radio station. Christmas music in July. And then last night, this businessman sat as the only white man in a crowded Hispanic restaurant/bar and put his feet up on the chair next to him, as he read his newspaper. His feet were on a chair, and his legs bent so that his knees rose above the table. He'd had dinner and white wine, and ordered dessert and more white wine. Then when I was dancing with a guy, he pushed me to get by, without saying a word. We all just looked at him. I thought, "Who does he think he IS?!" and I saw an almost full glass of white wine on his table. I wanted to reach over and grab it and down it, just to spite him. Thanks for the wine asshole. Of course, I didn't. It wouldn't be very cool for a man to do this, but I think a woman doing this would rock. Viva la revolution. Just kidding.
I've met a lot of middle eastern people over here, and many of my job offers are coming from this direction. And from the Turkish.
Right now, at this moment, a female country singer is singing, "Where are you Christmas? Where are you now?..." in an ethnic deli.
I have a hot date tonight. I've been networking today until I go out. He's a scientist. Yay! I love the NIH campus!!! And from another country (I won't say which, out of privacy interest). Yay! Interesting, no? Last night I danced with a bunch of Guatamalen and Honduran and Mexican men. I sort of learned how to salsa. I was working on stuff and was asked to dance, and how could I say no? But I don't know what the bar owner thinks of me now, because the only 2 other hispanic women left and I was the only woman along with a singer, and I danced with a whole roomful of men. Oh! and without other people standing up and dancing! I just partner danced with one after the other after the other. It was sort of daunting, but I had one cervesa con limon and that took the edge off. I danced with an old, old, man, and a serious gangbanger, and some honest workers, and a 22 year old who was celebrating his birthday that night. I danced at least one time with anyone who asked. It was fun. Nobody spoke English except me. I realized my Spanish isn't as good as I thought, or the music was loud, because I kept having to repeat myself. The music WAS really, really, loud. I found out I like a style of music called "bachata", and of course I danced to the reggaeton.
I'm going out with an Irish guy and already went out with probable CIA-guy who lives next to the organization base, and my roommate is black. We're just friends. Ah! but I love the diversity!
Now, if someone would just be so kind as to want to help me and my son by making an annonymous donation (or not annonymous) to a private attorney for my case, I would be happy.
I've met a lot of middle eastern people over here, and many of my job offers are coming from this direction. And from the Turkish.
Right now, at this moment, a female country singer is singing, "Where are you Christmas? Where are you now?..." in an ethnic deli.
I have a hot date tonight. I've been networking today until I go out. He's a scientist. Yay! I love the NIH campus!!! And from another country (I won't say which, out of privacy interest). Yay! Interesting, no? Last night I danced with a bunch of Guatamalen and Honduran and Mexican men. I sort of learned how to salsa. I was working on stuff and was asked to dance, and how could I say no? But I don't know what the bar owner thinks of me now, because the only 2 other hispanic women left and I was the only woman along with a singer, and I danced with a whole roomful of men. Oh! and without other people standing up and dancing! I just partner danced with one after the other after the other. It was sort of daunting, but I had one cervesa con limon and that took the edge off. I danced with an old, old, man, and a serious gangbanger, and some honest workers, and a 22 year old who was celebrating his birthday that night. I danced at least one time with anyone who asked. It was fun. Nobody spoke English except me. I realized my Spanish isn't as good as I thought, or the music was loud, because I kept having to repeat myself. The music WAS really, really, loud. I found out I like a style of music called "bachata", and of course I danced to the reggaeton.
I'm going out with an Irish guy and already went out with probable CIA-guy who lives next to the organization base, and my roommate is black. We're just friends. Ah! but I love the diversity!
Now, if someone would just be so kind as to want to help me and my son by making an annonymous donation (or not annonymous) to a private attorney for my case, I would be happy.
Thursday, July 24, 2008
Outcome of Hearing Yesterday
I got a continuance of one month.
So that is good, and I thanked the judge, even though I know any regular attorney would get a lot more than a month to prepare.
So either I'm screwed again in one month, pro se, or I luck out and have a private attorney to bat for me.
I am trying to get some diagnostics on my own in the meantime, but still don't have money for it. So, I have to network and wait on it. Which doesn't mean I'm being lazy. Let me tell you...the MEN over here are fiiiiiiiiiinee.
Scroll down for more hot news...
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I'm only kidding.
You know what the really sad thing was about the hearing yesterday, was that CASA workers and the state were trying to get the judge to enforce his order to ban my son from having telephone visitation with me. They wanted to cut off his conversations with his mother. These people are seriously sick. The judge said no, he wouldn't do this. So I continue with my phone calls to my son, which my son needs and benefits from. Here's the state, claiming to be interested in keeping the bond, and doing everything to break it. I've had roommates who have overheard my conversatoins with my son, and my aunt and her family know my talking with my son is good for him and always appropriate, as I tell him what I'm doing, ask him what he's been doing, sing songs with him that he loves and SINGS along with. Just the day before, I comforted my son to sleep and it's not the first time this has happened.
I hope the CASA people and state workers lose their jobs. They're a disgrace to children and families, and to the government. These CPS numbskulls would have all those FDLS children permanently removed from their loving mothers if they had anything to do with it. They must recruit only the most narrow-minded legal sluts for this kind of work. I'm just sayin'.
So that is good, and I thanked the judge, even though I know any regular attorney would get a lot more than a month to prepare.
So either I'm screwed again in one month, pro se, or I luck out and have a private attorney to bat for me.
I am trying to get some diagnostics on my own in the meantime, but still don't have money for it. So, I have to network and wait on it. Which doesn't mean I'm being lazy. Let me tell you...the MEN over here are fiiiiiiiiiinee.
Scroll down for more hot news...
keep scrolling......
keep scrolling....
keep scrolling.......
keep scrolling....
I'm only kidding.
You know what the really sad thing was about the hearing yesterday, was that CASA workers and the state were trying to get the judge to enforce his order to ban my son from having telephone visitation with me. They wanted to cut off his conversations with his mother. These people are seriously sick. The judge said no, he wouldn't do this. So I continue with my phone calls to my son, which my son needs and benefits from. Here's the state, claiming to be interested in keeping the bond, and doing everything to break it. I've had roommates who have overheard my conversatoins with my son, and my aunt and her family know my talking with my son is good for him and always appropriate, as I tell him what I'm doing, ask him what he's been doing, sing songs with him that he loves and SINGS along with. Just the day before, I comforted my son to sleep and it's not the first time this has happened.
I hope the CASA people and state workers lose their jobs. They're a disgrace to children and families, and to the government. These CPS numbskulls would have all those FDLS children permanently removed from their loving mothers if they had anything to do with it. They must recruit only the most narrow-minded legal sluts for this kind of work. I'm just sayin'.
DSMV I: Bitch
I think people just want me to be on medication for being a bitch when my occasional bitchiness is justified.
I think this realization is why I've been playing Meredith Brooks' song "Bitch" over and over like it's my personal anthem.
I can be a god-damn good mother and be a bitch too.
I've been listening to "Bitch" today (YEAH! fist in the air) and "Learn" by Alanis Morrisette. Even the shit that's thrown my way to bury me is useful. I've become stronger because of it, so thank you.
Thank you for making me stronger and showing me just how tough I really am.
Truth is, I'm very rarely this way, but only as is required or provoked. Nice people get a nicer me in return for usually, just being halfway normal and not obsessed with trying to smear me to cover up their own shit.
I'm just pumping up to write some more TTSOML's and get the rest of the truth out there. I did all that writing the last TTSOML time, under a bit of stress and with 2Monster drinks within reach. Good stuff.
I think this realization is why I've been playing Meredith Brooks' song "Bitch" over and over like it's my personal anthem.
I can be a god-damn good mother and be a bitch too.
I've been listening to "Bitch" today (YEAH! fist in the air) and "Learn" by Alanis Morrisette. Even the shit that's thrown my way to bury me is useful. I've become stronger because of it, so thank you.
Thank you for making me stronger and showing me just how tough I really am.
Truth is, I'm very rarely this way, but only as is required or provoked. Nice people get a nicer me in return for usually, just being halfway normal and not obsessed with trying to smear me to cover up their own shit.
I'm just pumping up to write some more TTSOML's and get the rest of the truth out there. I did all that writing the last TTSOML time, under a bit of stress and with 2Monster drinks within reach. Good stuff.
Singing On YouTube
I put more clips on my YouTube account (bisybear). I tried to convert files myself without my roommate's help, and something is wrong with the ones I did. They're all scratchy and I don't know, not smooth like they should be. So I'll have to replace them. They're extremely boring, but at least CPS or whomever can see for themselves how "drug-seeking" and mentally ill I appear to be, and all these clips contradict their suspicions. I may sound like an airhead, or look vain, but there's no bizarre "behavior" and this was during the time we were going through all the stuff.
There was nothing wrong with me except the acute pain and symptoms we suffered from. When I wrote about it, on my posts, I was in extreme pain and of course I sounded nuts because something was going on and no one paid attention.
I made the clips of just me when my son was asleep so they're quieter. Some of the original songs I do I usually belt out, but I couldn't sing to my potential with my son in the next room.
At least this gives people an idea of what I sound like and who I am on an everyday basis, when I'm not upset because I'm being harassed by others who are clueless. But I look at these clips of myself, and listen to how I talk, and it makes sense that people think I'm ditzy or vulnerable. My determined side is interior, not a surface thing (I think that could also be said for my intellect).
If I can get my roommate to set up his webcam and borrow my neighbor's guitar, I'll make some new clips of some of my original songs and add those. They'll sound a lot better with instruments and the music along with my voice.
Some of the things I do on camera are really stupid and it's embarassing, but I didn't think I would be putting these online--I was just experimenting for the first time with a webcam. I even have shots of me standing with underwear that's too tight on and making a crease in my butt. Not cool. But it's authentic I guess. I don't think I sound TOO crazy for someone who is just thinking out loud...??? do I? :)
I really do NOT like learning how to splice and convert files and video and stuff. It's too much "follow the directions" and put the parts together for me. It reminds me of those "assembly required" table and chair sets. Or anything which requires assembly. I hate assembly. Which is why I love others who get off on fixing things, putting things together, and assembling stuff.
There was nothing wrong with me except the acute pain and symptoms we suffered from. When I wrote about it, on my posts, I was in extreme pain and of course I sounded nuts because something was going on and no one paid attention.
I made the clips of just me when my son was asleep so they're quieter. Some of the original songs I do I usually belt out, but I couldn't sing to my potential with my son in the next room.
At least this gives people an idea of what I sound like and who I am on an everyday basis, when I'm not upset because I'm being harassed by others who are clueless. But I look at these clips of myself, and listen to how I talk, and it makes sense that people think I'm ditzy or vulnerable. My determined side is interior, not a surface thing (I think that could also be said for my intellect).
If I can get my roommate to set up his webcam and borrow my neighbor's guitar, I'll make some new clips of some of my original songs and add those. They'll sound a lot better with instruments and the music along with my voice.
Some of the things I do on camera are really stupid and it's embarassing, but I didn't think I would be putting these online--I was just experimenting for the first time with a webcam. I even have shots of me standing with underwear that's too tight on and making a crease in my butt. Not cool. But it's authentic I guess. I don't think I sound TOO crazy for someone who is just thinking out loud...??? do I? :)
I really do NOT like learning how to splice and convert files and video and stuff. It's too much "follow the directions" and put the parts together for me. It reminds me of those "assembly required" table and chair sets. Or anything which requires assembly. I hate assembly. Which is why I love others who get off on fixing things, putting things together, and assembling stuff.
Wednesday, July 23, 2008
Proposals Of Change For The Justice System In America
My concerns about the justice system (aside from small town corruption or corruption in general):
1. The right to trial is no longer a guarantee. In some cases where a jury should decide, there is no jury. I believe a jury should help decide dependency cases and any civil lawsuit which does asks for non-monetary "relief". Corporations who want to deprive someone of a jury trial and try to discredit someone can file a claim and, if they ask for "other relief" they know someone who is indigent will not be provided with representation. This often means trial will not follow as well.
2. Public defense should be provided for civil cases. Civil cases are as important as criminal cases and while conviction of a crime may land someone in jail, the inability to sue for civil rights violations leads to another kind of prison outside of the prison walls, and the damages may be as severe. Defamation, for example, if not fought, can lead to false arrest and convictions for crimes someone didn't commit, simply because their character was discredit and reputation tarnished and they were not able to fight it. That's a 2-step tactic plenty of lawyers employ. They know that if the person is too poor to fight back with a civil lawsuit, the next thing which could follow is their credibility is down the drain for everything else. This has happened to me and I haven't been cleared yet, nor have the proper people been held responsible.
3. Public defense attorneys should be held to standards of "reasonable counsel". There should be no excuse for the difference between PD and private defense. Public defenders should be held to a higher, not lower standard and should be recruited actively from the best law schools. In order for law students to take these jobs, law schools should be less expensive and those entering public interest law, should be ablet to state their intentions from the beginning and have a reduced tuition by at least half or more. Getting a license by reading of the law should also be allowed to avoid monopoly by the law schools and the bar associations, which are corporations themselves and money makers.
4. Summary judgement should be revised and have restrictions placed on it. The American judicial system is turning into the old fashioned legal system of 1800s England where the judge is superior to the jury and trials are rare. Judges should not be given the power to decide on the merits of a case by summary judgement, this was not the intention of those who drafted our first laws and bills, which were made to PROTECT the interests of the common by providing a trial by jury of their peers, not one judge who was also once a lawyer and has more in common with the attorneys than the common people.
5. Corporations need to have all of their privileges checked and reversed. The power corporations have gained has contributed to the inequal distribution of wealth in America and the weakening of the justice system. Corporations have more money and money has purchased our current laws and policies, which benefit the rich and corporations and harm the middle class and poor.
6. The right to file a lawsuit pro se and be given equal opportunity to access of justice should be encouraged. Anyone who files pro se and WINS their case, whether they are licensed or not, if they've filed on behalf of themselves and proved their case, they should have the right to receive compensation for their legal costs and expenditures because they never would have had to file and spend money to begin with, and waste their time, if the other party hadn't been guilty.
7. Laws which protect the common interests and the equal rights of all to civil liberities and justice, should be decided by the people, not the corporations and rich. It shouldn't take a Supreme Court lawsuit to change things, it should be possible to restrict powers of the corporation and introduce change in the justice system, by passing a bill through a majority vote of the common person.
8. Petty drug offenses should be decriminalized to free up PDs and the justice system from having to pack jails full of "dudes" with long hair. If someone wants to make minor drug use or possession a big deal, any and every person should be directed to rehab services or counseling, not the criminal system. Additionally, use of marijuana, in small amounts, should be decriminalized altogether as the health benefits for some far outweigh the risks and it shouldn't be made an issue that someone who needs medical marijuana can only legally obtain it, as it currently, from about 8 states in the union. It takes very little marijuana to control, for example, migraine headache, and prevent them, and the cost and labor benefit is great. The only people who lose out are pharmacuetical corporations who try to push all of 20 varieties of triptans instead, at $50 per migraine or more, or who push other meds as "preventative" treatments which cost an arm and leg, when marijuana can be grown for free and used in minimal amounts to not only prevent migraine, but abort it. The stigma should be removed for this reason.
9. Juevenile court cases should also be decided by a jury. A child or teenager should be respected and given the same equal access to the law as an adult. It is assumed the state will act in the best interest of the child, and this is not always true and some kids are railroaded or labled early-on. Kids and teens should be given a trial with a jury of their peers (teens and adults) because while convict
ions may not go on a permanent adult record, their liberty and civil rights are affected by any form of incarceration and forced treatment, if they are actually innocent. Kids from poor families are charged far more than kids from rich families, because rich families hire private attorneys to sway the judge. At the very least, kids should have the right to a jury, in order to have their case filtered through the eyes of many instead of one judge.
10. Government offices, state and federal, need more checks and balances by the public. The public needs more control over ethics complaints, misconduct, and other violations. Public offices who are supposed to serve the public should also be willing to be held accountable by the public.
There's more, but that's all for now.
1. The right to trial is no longer a guarantee. In some cases where a jury should decide, there is no jury. I believe a jury should help decide dependency cases and any civil lawsuit which does asks for non-monetary "relief". Corporations who want to deprive someone of a jury trial and try to discredit someone can file a claim and, if they ask for "other relief" they know someone who is indigent will not be provided with representation. This often means trial will not follow as well.
2. Public defense should be provided for civil cases. Civil cases are as important as criminal cases and while conviction of a crime may land someone in jail, the inability to sue for civil rights violations leads to another kind of prison outside of the prison walls, and the damages may be as severe. Defamation, for example, if not fought, can lead to false arrest and convictions for crimes someone didn't commit, simply because their character was discredit and reputation tarnished and they were not able to fight it. That's a 2-step tactic plenty of lawyers employ. They know that if the person is too poor to fight back with a civil lawsuit, the next thing which could follow is their credibility is down the drain for everything else. This has happened to me and I haven't been cleared yet, nor have the proper people been held responsible.
3. Public defense attorneys should be held to standards of "reasonable counsel". There should be no excuse for the difference between PD and private defense. Public defenders should be held to a higher, not lower standard and should be recruited actively from the best law schools. In order for law students to take these jobs, law schools should be less expensive and those entering public interest law, should be ablet to state their intentions from the beginning and have a reduced tuition by at least half or more. Getting a license by reading of the law should also be allowed to avoid monopoly by the law schools and the bar associations, which are corporations themselves and money makers.
4. Summary judgement should be revised and have restrictions placed on it. The American judicial system is turning into the old fashioned legal system of 1800s England where the judge is superior to the jury and trials are rare. Judges should not be given the power to decide on the merits of a case by summary judgement, this was not the intention of those who drafted our first laws and bills, which were made to PROTECT the interests of the common by providing a trial by jury of their peers, not one judge who was also once a lawyer and has more in common with the attorneys than the common people.
5. Corporations need to have all of their privileges checked and reversed. The power corporations have gained has contributed to the inequal distribution of wealth in America and the weakening of the justice system. Corporations have more money and money has purchased our current laws and policies, which benefit the rich and corporations and harm the middle class and poor.
6. The right to file a lawsuit pro se and be given equal opportunity to access of justice should be encouraged. Anyone who files pro se and WINS their case, whether they are licensed or not, if they've filed on behalf of themselves and proved their case, they should have the right to receive compensation for their legal costs and expenditures because they never would have had to file and spend money to begin with, and waste their time, if the other party hadn't been guilty.
7. Laws which protect the common interests and the equal rights of all to civil liberities and justice, should be decided by the people, not the corporations and rich. It shouldn't take a Supreme Court lawsuit to change things, it should be possible to restrict powers of the corporation and introduce change in the justice system, by passing a bill through a majority vote of the common person.
8. Petty drug offenses should be decriminalized to free up PDs and the justice system from having to pack jails full of "dudes" with long hair. If someone wants to make minor drug use or possession a big deal, any and every person should be directed to rehab services or counseling, not the criminal system. Additionally, use of marijuana, in small amounts, should be decriminalized altogether as the health benefits for some far outweigh the risks and it shouldn't be made an issue that someone who needs medical marijuana can only legally obtain it, as it currently, from about 8 states in the union. It takes very little marijuana to control, for example, migraine headache, and prevent them, and the cost and labor benefit is great. The only people who lose out are pharmacuetical corporations who try to push all of 20 varieties of triptans instead, at $50 per migraine or more, or who push other meds as "preventative" treatments which cost an arm and leg, when marijuana can be grown for free and used in minimal amounts to not only prevent migraine, but abort it. The stigma should be removed for this reason.
9. Juevenile court cases should also be decided by a jury. A child or teenager should be respected and given the same equal access to the law as an adult. It is assumed the state will act in the best interest of the child, and this is not always true and some kids are railroaded or labled early-on. Kids and teens should be given a trial with a jury of their peers (teens and adults) because while convict
ions may not go on a permanent adult record, their liberty and civil rights are affected by any form of incarceration and forced treatment, if they are actually innocent. Kids from poor families are charged far more than kids from rich families, because rich families hire private attorneys to sway the judge. At the very least, kids should have the right to a jury, in order to have their case filtered through the eyes of many instead of one judge.
10. Government offices, state and federal, need more checks and balances by the public. The public needs more control over ethics complaints, misconduct, and other violations. Public offices who are supposed to serve the public should also be willing to be held accountable by the public.
There's more, but that's all for now.
Letter to Mark Hepko On The Merits Of A Lawsuit
Dear Mark Hepko:
Sue the bastards.
I included the article by the Wenatchee World but I know there's more to the story, and obviously, you felt free to share some of the details.
Don't make the constant mistakes I've made of trying to warn people to change their ways, or else you'll sue, just sue. I give people chances to correct their errors, thinking they'll do the right thing, and 9 times out of 10, by the time they've already done the WRONG thing, they're not going to admit they were wrong and correct themselves. If it's anything where they know they could be held legally liable, or have a bad mark on their career, they will cover it up or go after you to discredit you first.
Learn from my mistakes, because I made the same one over and over and over. At least I hope I can help others to understand. Do everything discreetly, until they get slammed and served with the court papers. If you tip them off ahead of time, not only will they go after YOU and start blaming you for things and slandering you to shift the focus and blame, but they will dodge service if they think you've got a lawyer.
Everyone knows how lousy the Wenatchee system is. They should have contacted you and didn't, and I would think they'd keep track of someone who at any time had an addiction to meth. Meth is serious.
Anyone who has been run through the mill or deprived justice, and who has suffered serious damage because of office irresponsiblity should not just "take it" anymore. Sue the bastards. I wish you the best of luck. Don't take the first lawyer's word for anything either, if he or she tells you you don't have a case. Sometimes, you have to go to 10 or 20 to find someone who wants it, who feels passionately about it. It's often not that people do or don't have grounds to sue, it's whether a particular lawyer is intellectually or emotionally interested in it. They think about whether they want to work on it, invest in it, think about it, and spend time on it, and what the payoff will be. Everyone is different and is passionate about different causes. I hope you find someone who will take your case.
I'm very sorry this happened to you.
Frankly, I don't think Wenatchee is a good place for anyone to live except generational families or those who pull the strings. Everyone else, in my opinion, should abandon ship.
Finally, I know there are still huge levels of discrmination against young teen mothers there, who are coerced to give up their babies to other waiting parents who are friends with the workers and want to adopt. I also know the hispanic immigrants are discriminated against as well, and they are at a huge disadvantage because of language barriers on top of everything else.
I believe very strongly, in the power of the lawsuit. The only complaint about a "litigious" society that one should have, is that only those with money typically are able to file suit and win. Corporations do much of the suing, and without any restrictions, to protect their business interests, and yet personal injury caps are placed on the common people, who suffer harm and do not have the rest of a company to fall back on. The imbalance is gross.
One good thing about Obama is that, as a black man who has had exposure to his community, he knows how THEY have been historically railroaded. They've seen the shadow side of "justice" and their men still outnumber all others for convictions. People can be set up to fail, and if a group with greater resources wants to do it, they can manipulate what happens to someone simply by using their money to jerk the apron strings of Justice. Anytime a regular person has a chance to sue, they should. More people should be suing.
Being a pacifist and "forgiving" is harmful to society--at least to a society of "equals". People and organizations have to be held accountable.
Christianity has been used to keep people down in the past. Slaves were told the Bible justified slavery and to give to Caesar what was Caesars and serve their master's happily. Americans leaving England were told to obey their king and not to defy England for the same reason--that the King was divinely appointed and the Bible says to obey your authorities. The Americans who left England had to use counter-propoganda to gain strength for their mission. The arguments made are that England lost its privileges...Read letters of Thomas Paine and George Washington. It was a religious argument that furthered the Revolution. Without it, they could not have gained the support they needed, because most people were christian and religious and wanted to follow what they thought was "right" or biblical. So some people had to introduce them to a new way of thinking and reframe those religious arguments.
I think now that the revolution needs to be of the common people against the corporations and big money. This country is currently a plutocracy, not an actual democracy, and the only way to get it back is to fight for it, even if it's only one lawsuit at a time. For every lawsuit that is NOT filed, the corporation becomes stronger. Special interests gain ground. And regular people endanger themselves, their families, and their communities by standing by as their civil rights are trampled on.
Good luck.
Sue the bastards.
I included the article by the Wenatchee World but I know there's more to the story, and obviously, you felt free to share some of the details.
Don't make the constant mistakes I've made of trying to warn people to change their ways, or else you'll sue, just sue. I give people chances to correct their errors, thinking they'll do the right thing, and 9 times out of 10, by the time they've already done the WRONG thing, they're not going to admit they were wrong and correct themselves. If it's anything where they know they could be held legally liable, or have a bad mark on their career, they will cover it up or go after you to discredit you first.
Learn from my mistakes, because I made the same one over and over and over. At least I hope I can help others to understand. Do everything discreetly, until they get slammed and served with the court papers. If you tip them off ahead of time, not only will they go after YOU and start blaming you for things and slandering you to shift the focus and blame, but they will dodge service if they think you've got a lawyer.
Everyone knows how lousy the Wenatchee system is. They should have contacted you and didn't, and I would think they'd keep track of someone who at any time had an addiction to meth. Meth is serious.
Anyone who has been run through the mill or deprived justice, and who has suffered serious damage because of office irresponsiblity should not just "take it" anymore. Sue the bastards. I wish you the best of luck. Don't take the first lawyer's word for anything either, if he or she tells you you don't have a case. Sometimes, you have to go to 10 or 20 to find someone who wants it, who feels passionately about it. It's often not that people do or don't have grounds to sue, it's whether a particular lawyer is intellectually or emotionally interested in it. They think about whether they want to work on it, invest in it, think about it, and spend time on it, and what the payoff will be. Everyone is different and is passionate about different causes. I hope you find someone who will take your case.
I'm very sorry this happened to you.
Frankly, I don't think Wenatchee is a good place for anyone to live except generational families or those who pull the strings. Everyone else, in my opinion, should abandon ship.
Finally, I know there are still huge levels of discrmination against young teen mothers there, who are coerced to give up their babies to other waiting parents who are friends with the workers and want to adopt. I also know the hispanic immigrants are discriminated against as well, and they are at a huge disadvantage because of language barriers on top of everything else.
I believe very strongly, in the power of the lawsuit. The only complaint about a "litigious" society that one should have, is that only those with money typically are able to file suit and win. Corporations do much of the suing, and without any restrictions, to protect their business interests, and yet personal injury caps are placed on the common people, who suffer harm and do not have the rest of a company to fall back on. The imbalance is gross.
One good thing about Obama is that, as a black man who has had exposure to his community, he knows how THEY have been historically railroaded. They've seen the shadow side of "justice" and their men still outnumber all others for convictions. People can be set up to fail, and if a group with greater resources wants to do it, they can manipulate what happens to someone simply by using their money to jerk the apron strings of Justice. Anytime a regular person has a chance to sue, they should. More people should be suing.
Being a pacifist and "forgiving" is harmful to society--at least to a society of "equals". People and organizations have to be held accountable.
Christianity has been used to keep people down in the past. Slaves were told the Bible justified slavery and to give to Caesar what was Caesars and serve their master's happily. Americans leaving England were told to obey their king and not to defy England for the same reason--that the King was divinely appointed and the Bible says to obey your authorities. The Americans who left England had to use counter-propoganda to gain strength for their mission. The arguments made are that England lost its privileges...Read letters of Thomas Paine and George Washington. It was a religious argument that furthered the Revolution. Without it, they could not have gained the support they needed, because most people were christian and religious and wanted to follow what they thought was "right" or biblical. So some people had to introduce them to a new way of thinking and reframe those religious arguments.
I think now that the revolution needs to be of the common people against the corporations and big money. This country is currently a plutocracy, not an actual democracy, and the only way to get it back is to fight for it, even if it's only one lawsuit at a time. For every lawsuit that is NOT filed, the corporation becomes stronger. Special interests gain ground. And regular people endanger themselves, their families, and their communities by standing by as their civil rights are trampled on.
Good luck.
I Was Mistaken For A Native Spanish-Speaker
My get-going songs the last 3 days have been:
Akon's "Dangerous"
Usher's "Love In This Club"
Meredith Brooks "Bitch"
Also, this is random, but my Spanish must be getting pretty good. A few days ago, I went to a club with some people and I walked over to some guys who looked hispanic. I just wanted to practice my Spanish! So I began speaking to them in Spanish, with no English intro, and we talked for about 10 minutes and I asked them if they spoke English. They said yes and asked in Spanish if I also spoke English. When I said yes they laughed and started talking to me in English. They had to ask me if I spoke ENGLISH!!!! That's huge, right? for native spanish-speakers to assume my first language was Spanish? So I was flattered and proud and now I'm approaching anyone who looks hispanic or latino in the least, with Spanish first. This guy at the mall I asked directions from was really impressed and said it was also nice to see someone working on Spanish when the Spanish speakers work so hard on English. He didn't speak any English. Then, I talked with a Cuban-Honduran and he understood me perfectly as well.
My pronunciation is very good I think. I think I'm getting the rhythm down better too, so this is probably how I've enhanced my credibility. I just need some grammar classes.
I suppose I'm stress-writing now. But these are also things I want my son to know. I tried out some Farsi recently and that's a language I think I could pick up easily as well. French is harder for me, that gutteral sound...And even Arabic is difficult. There's one sound in Farsi that's a bit harder, but I could get it down with practice.
I wonder how many linguists are also musicians? It's all about hearing the sound and finding a way to replicate it. People trained in voice might have an easier time with mastering new sounds than others, I would think.
Akon's "Dangerous"
Usher's "Love In This Club"
Meredith Brooks "Bitch"
Also, this is random, but my Spanish must be getting pretty good. A few days ago, I went to a club with some people and I walked over to some guys who looked hispanic. I just wanted to practice my Spanish! So I began speaking to them in Spanish, with no English intro, and we talked for about 10 minutes and I asked them if they spoke English. They said yes and asked in Spanish if I also spoke English. When I said yes they laughed and started talking to me in English. They had to ask me if I spoke ENGLISH!!!! That's huge, right? for native spanish-speakers to assume my first language was Spanish? So I was flattered and proud and now I'm approaching anyone who looks hispanic or latino in the least, with Spanish first. This guy at the mall I asked directions from was really impressed and said it was also nice to see someone working on Spanish when the Spanish speakers work so hard on English. He didn't speak any English. Then, I talked with a Cuban-Honduran and he understood me perfectly as well.
My pronunciation is very good I think. I think I'm getting the rhythm down better too, so this is probably how I've enhanced my credibility. I just need some grammar classes.
I suppose I'm stress-writing now. But these are also things I want my son to know. I tried out some Farsi recently and that's a language I think I could pick up easily as well. French is harder for me, that gutteral sound...And even Arabic is difficult. There's one sound in Farsi that's a bit harder, but I could get it down with practice.
I wonder how many linguists are also musicians? It's all about hearing the sound and finding a way to replicate it. People trained in voice might have an easier time with mastering new sounds than others, I would think.
Proof I Did Not Get Notice
I can't show here how the mail is unopened, but at the bottom there is an email from Marie Scanlon, sent on 6/30/08 which is still unopened in my mailbox. I told AG McIntosh I didn't get notice of at least 20 days, and when SHE said I DID, I began to wonder. So I went to my mailbox and looked, and found this unopened email which MAY have been an attempt to "serve" me which I never received. I just have to print out the email address page to prove it I guess, because it will show up in bold, which indicates it's not been opened.
I didn't get good notice. Period.
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webmaster@wenworld.com Local headlines 7/09/08 25 KB
DRCNet Follow-Up: An Important Message from StoptheDrugWar.org 7/09/08 10 KB
Scanlon, Marie (DSHS/CA) Emailing: CC000001 (2).TIF 7/08/08 869 KB
webmaster@wenworld.com Local headlines 7/07/08 25 KB
David Plouffe, BarackObama.com Big announcement 7/07/08 7 KB
Scanlon, Marie (DSHS/CA) (No Subject) 7/07/08 19 KB
support@cwti.net Cheetahnetwork - Free Internet 7/06/08 4 KB
hollybeanpole@aol.com Fwd: Articles and pictures 7/06/08 4.1 MB
hollybeanpole@aol.com Re: inaccessible 7/04/08 10 KB
webmaster@wenworld.com Wenatchee World Local Headlines 7/04/08 25 KB
hollybeanpole@aol.com (No Subject) 7/04/08 9 KB
DRCNet Drug War Chronicle 7/04/08 12 KB
Jon Carson, BarackObama.com VIDEO: Unite for Change 7/03/08 11 KB
webmaster@wenworld.com Wenatchee World Local Headlines 7/03/08 26 KB
Jon Carson, BarackObama.com Get involved in Washington 7/02/08 8 KB
webmaster@wenworld.com Wenatchee World Local Headlines 7/02/08 26 KB
webmaster@wenworld.com Wenatchee World Local Headlines 7/01/08 26 KB
Blaine Library Notice - Bellingham-Whatcom County Libraries 7/01/08 2 KB
MSN Team New MSN Toolbar: Keep up with what's going on 7/01/08 28 KB
David Plouffe, BarackObama.com One more thing 6/30/08 7 KB
Scanlon, Marie (DSHS/CA) 6/25/08 court hearing 6/30/08 7 KB
webmaster@wenworld.com Wenatchee World Local Headlines 6/30/08 27 KB
DRCNet An Important Message from StoptheDrugWar.org 6/30/08 10 KB
Barack Obama Deadline: Midnight tonight 6/30/08 7 KB
Camp Horizon Re: Camp Horizon
I didn't get good notice. Period.
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Scanlon, Marie (DSHS/CA) Emailing: CC000001 (2).TIF 7/08/08 869 KB
webmaster@wenworld.com Local headlines 7/07/08 25 KB
David Plouffe, BarackObama.com Big announcement 7/07/08 7 KB
Scanlon, Marie (DSHS/CA) (No Subject) 7/07/08 19 KB
support@cwti.net Cheetahnetwork - Free Internet 7/06/08 4 KB
hollybeanpole@aol.com Fwd: Articles and pictures 7/06/08 4.1 MB
hollybeanpole@aol.com Re: inaccessible 7/04/08 10 KB
webmaster@wenworld.com Wenatchee World Local Headlines 7/04/08 25 KB
hollybeanpole@aol.com (No Subject) 7/04/08 9 KB
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Camp Horizon Re: Camp Horizon
Insufficient Service and Lack of Good Notice For Hearing
One thing I can argue, which Mary Ann McIntosh was angry about, is that I didn't get sufficient notice of a fact finding hearing. I'm supposed to have 20 days notice or something, and be "served" and I wasn't served. Mary Ann McIntosh told me a couple of days ago that I had "good notice" but I didn't.
I wasn't even able to check my email for a long time because I was on the road. I didn't get served by mail, or by newspaper publication, and any email notice I recieved, I opened and read about over 10 days after the last hearing. I have not had 20 days notice.
Mary Ann wants to argue otherwise, so I guess it's a good thing I didn't go back and open unopened email from that time period. It's still unopened. A whole chunk of mail is unopened because I couldn't read my email for awhile and then when I COULD, I didn't have time to go back and open past stuff so I just opened what was most recent. I heard there was fact finding, but didn't get any kind of service, or normal notice.
So that is probably NOT "good notice" Ms. Mary Ann.
Look forward to the Appeal.
I wasn't even able to check my email for a long time because I was on the road. I didn't get served by mail, or by newspaper publication, and any email notice I recieved, I opened and read about over 10 days after the last hearing. I have not had 20 days notice.
Mary Ann wants to argue otherwise, so I guess it's a good thing I didn't go back and open unopened email from that time period. It's still unopened. A whole chunk of mail is unopened because I couldn't read my email for awhile and then when I COULD, I didn't have time to go back and open past stuff so I just opened what was most recent. I heard there was fact finding, but didn't get any kind of service, or normal notice.
So that is probably NOT "good notice" Ms. Mary Ann.
Look forward to the Appeal.
Mary Ann McIntosh Justice--Wenatchee Style
AG Mary Ann McIntosh asked the court to quit my telephone visitation with my son and the Judge agreed and made an order, in the last hearing where no one was representing my side.
Funny how Mary Ann is claiming I've "abandoned" my son and yet tries to stop me from having telephone contact with my son.
I've been calling anyway. The state, it appears, already knows they're in trouble for the way the last hearing was handled, and didn't even want me to know they'd gone so far. So it's not been enforced.
My son is comforted by his mother's voice, and was soothed and fell asleep to it, last night, and yet if the state had their way, they wouldn't even want him to hear from me. How is it, again (?), that they are trying to reunite the mother and child? How is it, again, that I'M the one who has abandoned and neglected my son? The state has abandoned and neglected their responsibilities.
Trying to cut off the only form of visitation I can manage right now, while trying to get help, is an further attempt to break the bond between me and my son.
And they claim to be all about my son's best interests, and push him around, and his mother around, knowing he cannot even speak up for himself and what he wants.
Funny how Mary Ann is claiming I've "abandoned" my son and yet tries to stop me from having telephone contact with my son.
I've been calling anyway. The state, it appears, already knows they're in trouble for the way the last hearing was handled, and didn't even want me to know they'd gone so far. So it's not been enforced.
My son is comforted by his mother's voice, and was soothed and fell asleep to it, last night, and yet if the state had their way, they wouldn't even want him to hear from me. How is it, again (?), that they are trying to reunite the mother and child? How is it, again, that I'M the one who has abandoned and neglected my son? The state has abandoned and neglected their responsibilities.
Trying to cut off the only form of visitation I can manage right now, while trying to get help, is an further attempt to break the bond between me and my son.
And they claim to be all about my son's best interests, and push him around, and his mother around, knowing he cannot even speak up for himself and what he wants.
Letter About My Son's Breakdown Prior To Fact Finding Hearing Today
Marie,
In your "plea letter" to me, you wrote at the end, that I deserved to have a "breakdown". Then you went on to say it's amazing I didn't have MORE "breakdowns". It is YOUR fucking idiotic opinion that I had a "breakdown" and you still ASSUME what I said was happening to me and my son was NOT happening.
I have the right to prove these things WERE happening and that there was NO "breakdown". I yelled and wrote nasty emails because no one was listening to me when I was trying to get people to believe me. The only one who did was Andy Panda, who knows what was going on with my computers and electronics wasn't normal.
Then you claim at the end of your letter, that there are people who can "help" me. Funny how you seem to think those people are all in WENATCHEE. Where half the crappy things happened. If you claim to care about my getting help, your department would be happy to know I'm actually able to GET better help over here, and you would be supportive.
Your suspicions and assumptions are still unfounded. You have no way of proving what I said was happening, was NOT happening. My son's speech is still delayed and I quit having periods and had other documentation of damages. I have the right to get proof of these things.
What happens if I'm RIGHT Marie?
What would you do if it came back, verified, that I tested positive for exposure to high electromagnetic fields or radiation? It can be done. If it's TRUE, then what happens to your theory it was a "breakdown"? Your theory goes out the window and it is established I WAS in my right mind, and that my actions were NORMAL given the fact no one was doing anything about what was happening.
I do have people who believe I and my son were in danger, and that I pissed off some higher end people. I made reports about people in the CAtholic church and the FBI, and they are verified claims. One of the FBI agents I dated briefly told me he infiltrated the Mexican mafia. It was proven, by FBI field offices, that he really WAS FBI. I've had people in high ranking positions, who have resources and money, who could have access to equipment which could cause damage, try to cover up for things that they did which could cost them their careers. The FBI employees I reported, I found out, had committed actual sex crimes against me, which, if convicted, would force them to register as sex offenders and they would lose their jobs.
There are other people who have had money and motive, and if it wasn't random environmental things, it was intentional. I believe and know it WAS intentional, because what was happening to my computers wasn't random. I took it to Panda and he agreed. Someone was messing around with me.
Don't you think it would be great to do something that would make me sound crazy? You don't know anything about what I've "been through" and the level of people I've pissed off.
If you want to help me and my son, you will grant continuance until I am able to prove this is true, through diagnostics and also prove the Wenatchee doctors damaged me and my son and tried to cover this up as well, which was motive for their complaints to CPS.
You need to open your eyes and listen to yourself.
Wenatchee does not know best. And if you want to claim it does, how can you say no one else is qualified to help me except your department, which already screwed me and my son?
My son fell asleep last night, listening to my voice. He was upset, and when someone tried to leave the room, just to go around the corner, I heard him sob, shriek, and panic. My son FREAKS out when people "disappear" now, because YOU took his mother away. This was the worst trauma he's ever been through and he's not over the shock. He has signs of behavioral problems and extreme anxiety when someone tries to leave him. It's not normal separation anxiety. He has been traumatized by your department. In response to his fears, I talked to my son. I told him I knew he must be scared now, when people leave, because his mama was taken away from him. I told him he knew his mama kept her promises and said she'd be right back when they put him in another car, and he waited, and waited, and he didn't see her again. I told him I knew he had been very, very, sad, and scared, and that he couldn't eat very much, or sleep, and that he cried. I told him I knew how frustrating it was because he couldn't even tell anyone how much he wanted to be wiht his mama. I told him only he and I and God knew how close we were and how good our relationship was. I told I knew he knew I was a good mom, and I told him he did nothing wrong, and that I always wanted to see him, but some bad people wouldn't let me. So mama cried too, and couldn't sleep, or eat. I talked to him like this, explaining things, and going over them, telling him what I was doing now, that I was trying to get a private attorney and other people to help him. I told him not to worry if he overheard people saying his mama didn't want to, or refused to come back. I told him his mama was fighting for him from the first day, and that he would be with me again and live with me, and play with me, like before. I would take him to McDonalds again, an dthe library, and park, and preschool, and swimming. And as I was talking, my son quieted down. I asked Andres, "what is he doing?" and andres said he was just lying down on his blanket with his eyes open, listening to me. And after 20 minutes, my son fell asleep, soothed to sleep by comforting words and the voice he knows and loves.
That was last night.
I'd like to know how you intend to "help" my son TODAY. Are you going to give his mother a chance to get evidence, or are you going to keep railroading this case?
Cameo
In your "plea letter" to me, you wrote at the end, that I deserved to have a "breakdown". Then you went on to say it's amazing I didn't have MORE "breakdowns". It is YOUR fucking idiotic opinion that I had a "breakdown" and you still ASSUME what I said was happening to me and my son was NOT happening.
I have the right to prove these things WERE happening and that there was NO "breakdown". I yelled and wrote nasty emails because no one was listening to me when I was trying to get people to believe me. The only one who did was Andy Panda, who knows what was going on with my computers and electronics wasn't normal.
Then you claim at the end of your letter, that there are people who can "help" me. Funny how you seem to think those people are all in WENATCHEE. Where half the crappy things happened. If you claim to care about my getting help, your department would be happy to know I'm actually able to GET better help over here, and you would be supportive.
Your suspicions and assumptions are still unfounded. You have no way of proving what I said was happening, was NOT happening. My son's speech is still delayed and I quit having periods and had other documentation of damages. I have the right to get proof of these things.
What happens if I'm RIGHT Marie?
What would you do if it came back, verified, that I tested positive for exposure to high electromagnetic fields or radiation? It can be done. If it's TRUE, then what happens to your theory it was a "breakdown"? Your theory goes out the window and it is established I WAS in my right mind, and that my actions were NORMAL given the fact no one was doing anything about what was happening.
I do have people who believe I and my son were in danger, and that I pissed off some higher end people. I made reports about people in the CAtholic church and the FBI, and they are verified claims. One of the FBI agents I dated briefly told me he infiltrated the Mexican mafia. It was proven, by FBI field offices, that he really WAS FBI. I've had people in high ranking positions, who have resources and money, who could have access to equipment which could cause damage, try to cover up for things that they did which could cost them their careers. The FBI employees I reported, I found out, had committed actual sex crimes against me, which, if convicted, would force them to register as sex offenders and they would lose their jobs.
There are other people who have had money and motive, and if it wasn't random environmental things, it was intentional. I believe and know it WAS intentional, because what was happening to my computers wasn't random. I took it to Panda and he agreed. Someone was messing around with me.
Don't you think it would be great to do something that would make me sound crazy? You don't know anything about what I've "been through" and the level of people I've pissed off.
If you want to help me and my son, you will grant continuance until I am able to prove this is true, through diagnostics and also prove the Wenatchee doctors damaged me and my son and tried to cover this up as well, which was motive for their complaints to CPS.
You need to open your eyes and listen to yourself.
Wenatchee does not know best. And if you want to claim it does, how can you say no one else is qualified to help me except your department, which already screwed me and my son?
My son fell asleep last night, listening to my voice. He was upset, and when someone tried to leave the room, just to go around the corner, I heard him sob, shriek, and panic. My son FREAKS out when people "disappear" now, because YOU took his mother away. This was the worst trauma he's ever been through and he's not over the shock. He has signs of behavioral problems and extreme anxiety when someone tries to leave him. It's not normal separation anxiety. He has been traumatized by your department. In response to his fears, I talked to my son. I told him I knew he must be scared now, when people leave, because his mama was taken away from him. I told him he knew his mama kept her promises and said she'd be right back when they put him in another car, and he waited, and waited, and he didn't see her again. I told him I knew he had been very, very, sad, and scared, and that he couldn't eat very much, or sleep, and that he cried. I told him I knew how frustrating it was because he couldn't even tell anyone how much he wanted to be wiht his mama. I told him only he and I and God knew how close we were and how good our relationship was. I told I knew he knew I was a good mom, and I told him he did nothing wrong, and that I always wanted to see him, but some bad people wouldn't let me. So mama cried too, and couldn't sleep, or eat. I talked to him like this, explaining things, and going over them, telling him what I was doing now, that I was trying to get a private attorney and other people to help him. I told him not to worry if he overheard people saying his mama didn't want to, or refused to come back. I told him his mama was fighting for him from the first day, and that he would be with me again and live with me, and play with me, like before. I would take him to McDonalds again, an dthe library, and park, and preschool, and swimming. And as I was talking, my son quieted down. I asked Andres, "what is he doing?" and andres said he was just lying down on his blanket with his eyes open, listening to me. And after 20 minutes, my son fell asleep, soothed to sleep by comforting words and the voice he knows and loves.
That was last night.
I'd like to know how you intend to "help" my son TODAY. Are you going to give his mother a chance to get evidence, or are you going to keep railroading this case?
Cameo
Tuesday, July 22, 2008
Wenatchee CPS Neglects Duties--Baby and Mother Die
I have included an article by Jaime Adame, a reporter who has written a few stories for the Wenatchee World that I admired. Apparently, Wenatchee CPS is so focused on self-preservation and justification of MY CASE, and god knows what else, they have forgotten how to focus their attention and resources on cases which are legitimate and real. In the hours of conferences workers and lawyers have had about my case, and in colluding with Wenatchee medical professionals, to smear me and keep face, they could have been following up on REAL crisises. They didn't, and for such a small town, it's really not okay that this happened. Wenatchee is not a big city. Everyone knows everyone, and as a result of not following up on a case where the son was at very REAL risk of "harm", a baby and his mother are dead.
Some law firm or the ACLU or SOMEONE needs to fix that town. It is NOT going to happen with a couple of lawyers, there must be some big dogs with major resources to do it. I still say Wenatchee should be incorporated into King County. They cannot manage their own affairs. Everyone knows about the justice system in Wenatchee, and the state offices are not any better. Even the main hospital is losing some of its privileges.
The town is run on hysteria and gossip. And in putting social concerns and self-interest first, CPS and the state have focused on trying to nail me in a case without merit, and ignored serious warning signs.
For the family that lost their baby and daughter, I encourage you to find a lawyer, NOT in Wenatchee, but in Seattle. Do not tell people you're going to do it, just do it. Sue these people and hold them responsible for their negligence. When enough regular people stand up for themselves and sue, and take back what is theirs, and hold irresponsible offices accountable, the town will begin to change for the better, and it will be a safe place to live. See the article below:
Troubled woman had history with CPS
By Jaime Adame
World staff writer
Posted July 22, 2008
Enlarge this photo
A teddy bear, personal letters and several bouquets of flowers mark the place near Porter's Pond in East Wenatchee where Taunya Hilliard killed herself and her son, Spencer Hepko. (World photo/Kathryn Stevens)
Editor's note: This is the first of a two-part report on the July 7 deaths of Taunya Hilliard and her son, Spencer Hepko. The Wenatchee World has gathered information from family members, Child Protective Services and police and court records.
RELATED LINKS
STORY: Donations sought for memorial, playground equipment
STORY: 9-year-old boy shot in head dies at hospital
STORY TOOLS
ENLARGE
A memorial is left at Porter's Pond at the foot of 19th Street along the Apple Capital Loop Trail in East Wenatchee for Spencer Hepko and Taunya Hilliard. (World photo/Kathryn Stevens)
EAST WENATCHEE — Child Protective Services had some contact with Taunya L. Hilliard, the woman police say shot her 9-year-old son before turning the gun on herself near the Apple Capital Recreation Loop Trail in East Wenatchee.
But no active case involved Hilliard at the time of the July 7 shooting, said Connie Lambert-Eckel, a deputy regional administrator for the state division of Children and Family Services.
And Hilliard's brother said — despite his sister's prior drug abuse and an earlier suicide attempt in 2005 — things were looking up since her marriage to Sam Hilliard. The couple was living together with Spencer in East Wenatchee at the time of the shooting, according to police.
"Over the last two years, while Taunya's been married to Sam, things have been wonderful," said Brandon Jones. In 2000, Jones for a time had legal custody of his sister's three children, he said.
Ups and downs in his sister's life included a 2005 divorce, during which letters filed in Chelan County Superior Court described her as an angry woman who worried her family.
Still, Jones said he knew of nothing troubling his sister recently. He said their mother spoke with Taunya three days before the shooting, and "everything seemed completely fine."
'A really good mom'
Hilliard, 37, was found dead on the riverbank in the area known as Porter's Pond, a semi-automatic gun in her hand and a two-page handwritten note on the ground, police said. Her son, Spencer Hepko, had been shot in the head, and he died two days later at Harborview Medical Center in Seattle.
Family members have referred to Spencer as Spencer Hepko-Hilliard, but his name is Spencer Hepko on his death certificate, according to the King County Medical Examiner's Office.
Spencer was the child of Hilliard and her second husband, Mark Hepko. Before that marriage, Hilliard — who grew up Taunya Jones in Silverdale — had two children with her first husband.
"She, for a long time, was a really good mom. I know that's going to be hard for people to grasp," said Jones in a phone interview July 14. When he was closest to his sister, "her home was always clean, the kids were always clean and happy," he said.
Still, Jones said he phoned Child Protective Services several times over the years to report his sister neglecting Spencer.
"All of this started when she started using drugs," said Jones, 33, adding he never thought his sister physically abused her children.
Documents released by the Kent Police Department show in 2000 Child Protective Services stepped in after a report of abuse involving Mark Hepko, Spencer's father and Taunya's husband at the time. The documents suggest the investigation did not center on Spencer Hepko.
Mark Hepko would later serve prison time. In an e-mail interview, he called the shootings "the most tragic event of my life." He said he hadn't seen Taunya in more than six years or Spencer since 2002, except for at the hospital after the shooting. Hepko confirmed he and Taunya began using methamphetamine in 2000, four years after they were married.
Jones said he and his wife, April, were living in Monroe when they took custody of Taunya's three children. His sister was living in Kent at the time, he said.
Two children went to live with their biological father, while Spencer stayed with Jones' family for eight months, Jones said.
These concerns continued for years after his sister regained custody of Spencer, said Jones, now living in Mill Creek. He added that he called CPS numerous times, rarely hearing back from the state agency.
In the last two years, however, Jones said he thought his sister was no longer using drugs. He said he filed no complaints with CPS during this time, and described his sister's husband, Sam Hilliard, as "an amazing guy" who helped his sister quit drinking. Sam Hilliard did not respond to interview requests.
State, court involvement
In 2003, Taunya Hepko was convicted of driving under the influence in Douglas County District Court. The conviction is the only entry in her online criminal history, according to a Washington State Patrol database.
Court records show that in 2004 she married Brian Brons in East Wenatchee. The marriage would end about a year later.
In 2005, several letters written to Chelan County Superior Court described Taunya Brons as an angry woman, even as she sought a protection order against her husband.
"Taunya has a serious anger problem," wrote her sister, Tammie Riddell, in a letter filed in court.
Shortly before that letter, Riddell had called the Douglas County Sheriff's Office to report that her sister threatened her over the phone. No charges were filed. Riddell declined to speak with a reporter in the days after the shooting.
Taunya Brons had claimed that Brian Brons was peeking in her windows and leaving her notes and letters in her car at work. She also claimed he had verbally threatened an unnamed friend.
A judge decided not to grant a more permanent restraining order. Brian Brons did not respond to interview requests.
Jones said his sister had troubles, including involvement in an abusive relationship with a boyfriend, whose name he said he didn't remember, and a suicide attempt. Jones said the suicide attempt occurred in 2005 somewhere in the Wenatchee area.
"I don't know what kind of pills, but she took some pills," said Jones, adding that a boyfriend called for help immediately and she was hospitalized for a day or two.
"I spoke with her the next morning," said Jones in a phone interview this morning, adding that he also heard about the incident from a relative. He said he thought his sister had been upset after a dispute with a boyfriend.
After the incident, his sister voluntarily agreed to temporarily give up Spencer, and Jones said he cared for Spencer for about two months that summer, a transfer that he said involved state welfare workers.
"He went back to her right before school started," said Jones, adding that he remained concerned about Spencer's welfare.
Lambert-Eckel declined to give details about CPS' involvement with Hilliard and her son, citing the ongoing police investigation. She did confirm that CPS had involvement with the family in two places in the state, including the Wenatchee area.
Another welfare official said CPS does not automatically remove a child if there is a parental suicide attempt, but welfare workers rely on mental health professionals to decide what to do. A suicidal parent is offered services such as counseling, said Sharon Gilbert, deputy director for field operations in the state Children's Administration, a division of the state Department of Social and Health Services.
Welfare documents about the family will become public within 30 days after all investigations conclude, according to a letter from the state Department of Social and Health Services sent to a reporter seeking case reports.
Gilbert said welfare authorities were not required to investigate because they had not provided services to the family within the previous year, but a formal investigation was expected to take place anyway to review how welfare authorities handled complaints and delivered services to the family.
Jones said he doesn't think CPS handled his earlier complaints correctly, some of which he made out of concern for Spencer after his sister moved to the Wenatchee area.
"I'm not saying that I blame CPS for what's happening right now," Jones said. "What I'm saying is, if they had done a better job in the time reports were being made, she may not have had custody of him."
Jaime Adame: 664-7144
adame@wenworld.com
COMMENTS
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CPS may not automatically remove a child from the house of an attempted suicide by a parent but one would think that they might decide to contact the other parent of the child. Especially if he had his parental rights to the child. Especially if he had gone to treatment, been subjected to UA's and jumped through all of CPS's requirements. One would think he deserved a call from a case manager to let him know. That is my concern, and that will be what I try to change. Not one phone call, no certified letter. I was contacted within hours when my son was shot by his mother, by guess who...DSHS. Thanks but you're too late.
Spencer's Dad
Mark Hepko | Jul 22, 2008 12:27 pm | Request Removal
Some law firm or the ACLU or SOMEONE needs to fix that town. It is NOT going to happen with a couple of lawyers, there must be some big dogs with major resources to do it. I still say Wenatchee should be incorporated into King County. They cannot manage their own affairs. Everyone knows about the justice system in Wenatchee, and the state offices are not any better. Even the main hospital is losing some of its privileges.
The town is run on hysteria and gossip. And in putting social concerns and self-interest first, CPS and the state have focused on trying to nail me in a case without merit, and ignored serious warning signs.
For the family that lost their baby and daughter, I encourage you to find a lawyer, NOT in Wenatchee, but in Seattle. Do not tell people you're going to do it, just do it. Sue these people and hold them responsible for their negligence. When enough regular people stand up for themselves and sue, and take back what is theirs, and hold irresponsible offices accountable, the town will begin to change for the better, and it will be a safe place to live. See the article below:
Troubled woman had history with CPS
By Jaime Adame
World staff writer
Posted July 22, 2008
Enlarge this photo
A teddy bear, personal letters and several bouquets of flowers mark the place near Porter's Pond in East Wenatchee where Taunya Hilliard killed herself and her son, Spencer Hepko. (World photo/Kathryn Stevens)
Editor's note: This is the first of a two-part report on the July 7 deaths of Taunya Hilliard and her son, Spencer Hepko. The Wenatchee World has gathered information from family members, Child Protective Services and police and court records.
RELATED LINKS
STORY: Donations sought for memorial, playground equipment
STORY: 9-year-old boy shot in head dies at hospital
STORY TOOLS
ENLARGE
A memorial is left at Porter's Pond at the foot of 19th Street along the Apple Capital Loop Trail in East Wenatchee for Spencer Hepko and Taunya Hilliard. (World photo/Kathryn Stevens)
EAST WENATCHEE — Child Protective Services had some contact with Taunya L. Hilliard, the woman police say shot her 9-year-old son before turning the gun on herself near the Apple Capital Recreation Loop Trail in East Wenatchee.
But no active case involved Hilliard at the time of the July 7 shooting, said Connie Lambert-Eckel, a deputy regional administrator for the state division of Children and Family Services.
And Hilliard's brother said — despite his sister's prior drug abuse and an earlier suicide attempt in 2005 — things were looking up since her marriage to Sam Hilliard. The couple was living together with Spencer in East Wenatchee at the time of the shooting, according to police.
"Over the last two years, while Taunya's been married to Sam, things have been wonderful," said Brandon Jones. In 2000, Jones for a time had legal custody of his sister's three children, he said.
Ups and downs in his sister's life included a 2005 divorce, during which letters filed in Chelan County Superior Court described her as an angry woman who worried her family.
Still, Jones said he knew of nothing troubling his sister recently. He said their mother spoke with Taunya three days before the shooting, and "everything seemed completely fine."
'A really good mom'
Hilliard, 37, was found dead on the riverbank in the area known as Porter's Pond, a semi-automatic gun in her hand and a two-page handwritten note on the ground, police said. Her son, Spencer Hepko, had been shot in the head, and he died two days later at Harborview Medical Center in Seattle.
Family members have referred to Spencer as Spencer Hepko-Hilliard, but his name is Spencer Hepko on his death certificate, according to the King County Medical Examiner's Office.
Spencer was the child of Hilliard and her second husband, Mark Hepko. Before that marriage, Hilliard — who grew up Taunya Jones in Silverdale — had two children with her first husband.
"She, for a long time, was a really good mom. I know that's going to be hard for people to grasp," said Jones in a phone interview July 14. When he was closest to his sister, "her home was always clean, the kids were always clean and happy," he said.
Still, Jones said he phoned Child Protective Services several times over the years to report his sister neglecting Spencer.
"All of this started when she started using drugs," said Jones, 33, adding he never thought his sister physically abused her children.
Documents released by the Kent Police Department show in 2000 Child Protective Services stepped in after a report of abuse involving Mark Hepko, Spencer's father and Taunya's husband at the time. The documents suggest the investigation did not center on Spencer Hepko.
Mark Hepko would later serve prison time. In an e-mail interview, he called the shootings "the most tragic event of my life." He said he hadn't seen Taunya in more than six years or Spencer since 2002, except for at the hospital after the shooting. Hepko confirmed he and Taunya began using methamphetamine in 2000, four years after they were married.
Jones said he and his wife, April, were living in Monroe when they took custody of Taunya's three children. His sister was living in Kent at the time, he said.
Two children went to live with their biological father, while Spencer stayed with Jones' family for eight months, Jones said.
These concerns continued for years after his sister regained custody of Spencer, said Jones, now living in Mill Creek. He added that he called CPS numerous times, rarely hearing back from the state agency.
In the last two years, however, Jones said he thought his sister was no longer using drugs. He said he filed no complaints with CPS during this time, and described his sister's husband, Sam Hilliard, as "an amazing guy" who helped his sister quit drinking. Sam Hilliard did not respond to interview requests.
State, court involvement
In 2003, Taunya Hepko was convicted of driving under the influence in Douglas County District Court. The conviction is the only entry in her online criminal history, according to a Washington State Patrol database.
Court records show that in 2004 she married Brian Brons in East Wenatchee. The marriage would end about a year later.
In 2005, several letters written to Chelan County Superior Court described Taunya Brons as an angry woman, even as she sought a protection order against her husband.
"Taunya has a serious anger problem," wrote her sister, Tammie Riddell, in a letter filed in court.
Shortly before that letter, Riddell had called the Douglas County Sheriff's Office to report that her sister threatened her over the phone. No charges were filed. Riddell declined to speak with a reporter in the days after the shooting.
Taunya Brons had claimed that Brian Brons was peeking in her windows and leaving her notes and letters in her car at work. She also claimed he had verbally threatened an unnamed friend.
A judge decided not to grant a more permanent restraining order. Brian Brons did not respond to interview requests.
Jones said his sister had troubles, including involvement in an abusive relationship with a boyfriend, whose name he said he didn't remember, and a suicide attempt. Jones said the suicide attempt occurred in 2005 somewhere in the Wenatchee area.
"I don't know what kind of pills, but she took some pills," said Jones, adding that a boyfriend called for help immediately and she was hospitalized for a day or two.
"I spoke with her the next morning," said Jones in a phone interview this morning, adding that he also heard about the incident from a relative. He said he thought his sister had been upset after a dispute with a boyfriend.
After the incident, his sister voluntarily agreed to temporarily give up Spencer, and Jones said he cared for Spencer for about two months that summer, a transfer that he said involved state welfare workers.
"He went back to her right before school started," said Jones, adding that he remained concerned about Spencer's welfare.
Lambert-Eckel declined to give details about CPS' involvement with Hilliard and her son, citing the ongoing police investigation. She did confirm that CPS had involvement with the family in two places in the state, including the Wenatchee area.
Another welfare official said CPS does not automatically remove a child if there is a parental suicide attempt, but welfare workers rely on mental health professionals to decide what to do. A suicidal parent is offered services such as counseling, said Sharon Gilbert, deputy director for field operations in the state Children's Administration, a division of the state Department of Social and Health Services.
Welfare documents about the family will become public within 30 days after all investigations conclude, according to a letter from the state Department of Social and Health Services sent to a reporter seeking case reports.
Gilbert said welfare authorities were not required to investigate because they had not provided services to the family within the previous year, but a formal investigation was expected to take place anyway to review how welfare authorities handled complaints and delivered services to the family.
Jones said he doesn't think CPS handled his earlier complaints correctly, some of which he made out of concern for Spencer after his sister moved to the Wenatchee area.
"I'm not saying that I blame CPS for what's happening right now," Jones said. "What I'm saying is, if they had done a better job in the time reports were being made, she may not have had custody of him."
Jaime Adame: 664-7144
adame@wenworld.com
COMMENTS
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CPS may not automatically remove a child from the house of an attempted suicide by a parent but one would think that they might decide to contact the other parent of the child. Especially if he had his parental rights to the child. Especially if he had gone to treatment, been subjected to UA's and jumped through all of CPS's requirements. One would think he deserved a call from a case manager to let him know. That is my concern, and that will be what I try to change. Not one phone call, no certified letter. I was contacted within hours when my son was shot by his mother, by guess who...DSHS. Thanks but you're too late.
Spencer's Dad
Mark Hepko | Jul 22, 2008 12:27 pm | Request Removal
Monday, July 21, 2008
The Agenda Of Mary Ann McIntosh, AG in Wenatchee
Please forward to Ann McIntosh, who still has not given me her email address:
If you go forward with fact finding, I will appeal to State Supreme Court.
You have given me enough notice of this hearing, nor was I given sufficient notice I was to be "pro se" in the LAST hearing.
I have a right to collect evidence for my defense against your fact finding claims, and I don't have this yet. I also have a right to have seen all of your discovery prior to fact finding, and to a copy of the audio for the last hearing.
It is not in the best interest of my son to have his mother found guilty of crimes against her son that SHE DID NOT commit and is innocent of. Your department was wrong to take my son, and did not have sufficient grounds. You have proven, by refusing me reasonable counsel, accomodation for disability, and visitation, as well as continuance, that you are self-interested and do not care about my son's interests. If I am NOT guilty of your charges, and can PROVE this, I have a legal right to continuance in order to collect evidence to support my case. If I am not guilty, then my son should be returned to me without delay, and this is the most expedient way for his damages in separation from me, to be remedied.
All you want is a stamp of approval on the action you took, which was unmerited. My son is and was never abused, neglected, OR at risk of harm while in my care.
The fact that you don't want to allow me time to get documentation to prove this, shows you don't care about my son. If you wanted my son to be back with me, you would allow a continuance to prove my claim and make my defense.
Because you DON"T want my son to be with me, this is why you choose to move forward, to attempt to find me guilty, have my son's guardianship permanently removed from me, and to set him up for adoption. You feel it's better he be adopted out as quickly as possible, and not allowing me time to make my defense is the easiest way to do this.
You have been arbitrarily prejudiced against me from Day One and still, to date, have not given me any notice as to what happened in the last hearing.
I spoke with the AG Ann McIntosh today and she was curt and rude, and basically said she didn't care whether I was physically disabled or not, and said she was going to claim I had abandoned my son. I never abandoned him. I had to move to get the discovery and evidence I need to make my defense. I also went to every single visitation with my son until the buses were too crowded to allow me to lie on my side, against two seats. When I developed severe pain and other worsening symptoms, I asked for a change of venue, and gave my own PD a note from my doctor, which asks for change of venue so I don't have to travel due to my disabilities from childbirth. My PD never used that note and the Judge said he never saw it. I told my PD besides that the doctor said he could write a better letter and notorize it, if my PD contacted him. My PD never contacted him. I couldn't travel because of my injuries and I missed out on visitation with my son because of the STATE, and discrimination, NOT because I "abandoned" my son. I have countless emails which show how many times I requested MORE visitation time wiht my son, when I was able to travel and the buses weren't packed. I asked for MORE time, and the state refused THIS, claiming it was too inconvient for them to organize.
The state put their own interests, Wenatchee put their own interests, in wanting to have things THEIR way and railroad me in a Wenatchee court system, rather than heed rules and laws for accomodation for disablity, and preserve the right of my son to see his mother, whom my aunt TOLD the state he missed and needed.
I have never abandoned my son, but now the state wants to claim this, to avoid responsibility for FAILING my son.
After 2 months of not seeing my son, after repeated requests for visitation and for transfer of my son so I could see him, I left to get evaluations and medical care that I need, for my case. This is not abandonment. This is called being a proactive mother who cares what happens to her son and that it will take longer for him to be placed with her again if the state wins a fact finding hearing.
I can only get certain diagnostics IN this area, in Maryland, which is why I came here. It cannot be done anywhere else.
Your refusal to allow continuance, after everything you've already done, proves you are setting my son up to be adopted out, and have no interest in not just his rights to visitation with me, but in his right to be with his mother.
Is it so bad to be wrong?
It must be, to do this to a baby. None of you should keep your jobs. You are unable to put a child first and attempt to bully and coerce a parent to your agenda, which is clearly self-protective.
You also didn't bother to get my diagnostics from Seattle, which prove I have a broken tailbone and fractured pelvis. Neither did you both to get my and my son's records from Canada, and I've told you several times you need to get these. Why is it that you don't want any medical records outside of Wenatchee records?
hmmm.
Cameo
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Subject: RE: Letter For Mary Ann McIntosh
Date: Mon, 21 Jul 2008 08:59:43 -0700
From: ERMI300@dshs.wa.gov
To: cameocares@live.com
CC: SCNL300@dshs.wa.gov
Ms. Garrett,
Please be advised that I have forwarded your email to Ms. McIntosh and she will respond to you at the mailing address you have provided.
The Department does not agree to a continuance of this matter in court and will press to go forward with the dependency fact finding hearing this Wednesday.
Please also be advised that Mr. Caballero has blocked your email address and he is no longer working Dependency cases. It does no good for you to continue addressing him in your emails as he will not receive them.
I will send as much of your discovery as I am able this week, however Ms. Scanlon is out of the office this week. She handles the court work part of your case therefore some of it may not be sent until next Monday, July 28, 2008 when she returns. The Department does not generally keep court transcripts in client files. There are no court transcripts in your file, therefore none will be provided to you in your discovery. You will have to contact the Douglas County Court Clerk to request court transcripts.
Thank you for your time and take care!
Michelle Erickson, MSW
Social Worker III
Division of Children and Family Services
Wenatchee
Phone: (509) 667-6118
Fax: (509) 664-6358
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
From: cam huegenot [mailto:cameocares@live.com]
Sent: Monday, July 21, 2008 7:46 AM
To: Jeanne Wellbaum; jkoch@co.douglas.wa.us; Erickson, Michelle K. (DSHS/CA); paul_glassen@hotmail.com; pcassel@cbm-law.us; Scanlon, Marie (DSHS/CA); Caballero, Tomas (ATG)
Subject: Letter For Mary Ann McIntosh
Importance: High
For Mary Ann McIntosh,
I do not have a landline phone to use. At all. All I have is a cell phone and I cannot afford the minutes. I can barely afford to call my son everyday, and the state and CPS have done nothing to facilitate this form of visitation. I also do not have the ability to write to you by regular mail as there is no printer, and handwritten notes are not okay for legal documentation which I would have to copy to everyone. It would take too long besides.
I have asked for a continuance, because I've not obtained evidence yet which is crucial to my defense, and because I had to relocate to access these services. I'm also having severe physical problems which need attention and I cannot get medical care in Wenatchee or the Washington area. I'm not having my periods at all, and while this is normal for 1-2 months, under stress, it is NOT normal to persist for 8 months, and to get worse with passing time. There are phsyical damages to my body which need attention and I don't have the legal resources to access law books and write my own motions in proper form. Besides which, the state has already been forced to acknowledge THEY believe I have at least a mild form of PTSD. I have documentation to prove the AG's office, which represnted the state in the Fair Hearing, has knowledge of probably mild PTSD and if you continue to discriminate against me and refuse accomodations for at least disabilities which YOU have claimed to have knowledge of, you will be in a poor position to claim you are acting in the best interests of the mother and son and that you care about reunification or respect our rights to visitation, services, and to be a family.
You must allow time for me to collect evidence, just as any lawyer would do and ask of you.
You must also take into consideration that I am indigent and cannot afford certain resources, which is why I requested reasonable public defense. The key word is reasonable.
It seems to me that you are attempting to avoid giving out your email address so there can be no possible written record of my attempt to communicate with you and ask for cooperation. If you cared about the interests of my son, you would make the necessary accomodations to facilitate communication, and not put up obstacles.
It seems I will have to appeal the actions of this department. I am copying all of these parties so it cannot be claimed no one knew what was going on, and what my attempts were to communicate with you and the court. Any one of you, especially Tomas Caballero, can easily forward these emails onto you, and if he refuses to do so, knowing my circumstances, I can prove accomodations were never made on my behalf.
Cameo Garrett
If you go forward with fact finding, I will appeal to State Supreme Court.
You have given me enough notice of this hearing, nor was I given sufficient notice I was to be "pro se" in the LAST hearing.
I have a right to collect evidence for my defense against your fact finding claims, and I don't have this yet. I also have a right to have seen all of your discovery prior to fact finding, and to a copy of the audio for the last hearing.
It is not in the best interest of my son to have his mother found guilty of crimes against her son that SHE DID NOT commit and is innocent of. Your department was wrong to take my son, and did not have sufficient grounds. You have proven, by refusing me reasonable counsel, accomodation for disability, and visitation, as well as continuance, that you are self-interested and do not care about my son's interests. If I am NOT guilty of your charges, and can PROVE this, I have a legal right to continuance in order to collect evidence to support my case. If I am not guilty, then my son should be returned to me without delay, and this is the most expedient way for his damages in separation from me, to be remedied.
All you want is a stamp of approval on the action you took, which was unmerited. My son is and was never abused, neglected, OR at risk of harm while in my care.
The fact that you don't want to allow me time to get documentation to prove this, shows you don't care about my son. If you wanted my son to be back with me, you would allow a continuance to prove my claim and make my defense.
Because you DON"T want my son to be with me, this is why you choose to move forward, to attempt to find me guilty, have my son's guardianship permanently removed from me, and to set him up for adoption. You feel it's better he be adopted out as quickly as possible, and not allowing me time to make my defense is the easiest way to do this.
You have been arbitrarily prejudiced against me from Day One and still, to date, have not given me any notice as to what happened in the last hearing.
I spoke with the AG Ann McIntosh today and she was curt and rude, and basically said she didn't care whether I was physically disabled or not, and said she was going to claim I had abandoned my son. I never abandoned him. I had to move to get the discovery and evidence I need to make my defense. I also went to every single visitation with my son until the buses were too crowded to allow me to lie on my side, against two seats. When I developed severe pain and other worsening symptoms, I asked for a change of venue, and gave my own PD a note from my doctor, which asks for change of venue so I don't have to travel due to my disabilities from childbirth. My PD never used that note and the Judge said he never saw it. I told my PD besides that the doctor said he could write a better letter and notorize it, if my PD contacted him. My PD never contacted him. I couldn't travel because of my injuries and I missed out on visitation with my son because of the STATE, and discrimination, NOT because I "abandoned" my son. I have countless emails which show how many times I requested MORE visitation time wiht my son, when I was able to travel and the buses weren't packed. I asked for MORE time, and the state refused THIS, claiming it was too inconvient for them to organize.
The state put their own interests, Wenatchee put their own interests, in wanting to have things THEIR way and railroad me in a Wenatchee court system, rather than heed rules and laws for accomodation for disablity, and preserve the right of my son to see his mother, whom my aunt TOLD the state he missed and needed.
I have never abandoned my son, but now the state wants to claim this, to avoid responsibility for FAILING my son.
After 2 months of not seeing my son, after repeated requests for visitation and for transfer of my son so I could see him, I left to get evaluations and medical care that I need, for my case. This is not abandonment. This is called being a proactive mother who cares what happens to her son and that it will take longer for him to be placed with her again if the state wins a fact finding hearing.
I can only get certain diagnostics IN this area, in Maryland, which is why I came here. It cannot be done anywhere else.
Your refusal to allow continuance, after everything you've already done, proves you are setting my son up to be adopted out, and have no interest in not just his rights to visitation with me, but in his right to be with his mother.
Is it so bad to be wrong?
It must be, to do this to a baby. None of you should keep your jobs. You are unable to put a child first and attempt to bully and coerce a parent to your agenda, which is clearly self-protective.
You also didn't bother to get my diagnostics from Seattle, which prove I have a broken tailbone and fractured pelvis. Neither did you both to get my and my son's records from Canada, and I've told you several times you need to get these. Why is it that you don't want any medical records outside of Wenatchee records?
hmmm.
Cameo
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Subject: RE: Letter For Mary Ann McIntosh
Date: Mon, 21 Jul 2008 08:59:43 -0700
From: ERMI300@dshs.wa.gov
To: cameocares@live.com
CC: SCNL300@dshs.wa.gov
Ms. Garrett,
Please be advised that I have forwarded your email to Ms. McIntosh and she will respond to you at the mailing address you have provided.
The Department does not agree to a continuance of this matter in court and will press to go forward with the dependency fact finding hearing this Wednesday.
Please also be advised that Mr. Caballero has blocked your email address and he is no longer working Dependency cases. It does no good for you to continue addressing him in your emails as he will not receive them.
I will send as much of your discovery as I am able this week, however Ms. Scanlon is out of the office this week. She handles the court work part of your case therefore some of it may not be sent until next Monday, July 28, 2008 when she returns. The Department does not generally keep court transcripts in client files. There are no court transcripts in your file, therefore none will be provided to you in your discovery. You will have to contact the Douglas County Court Clerk to request court transcripts.
Thank you for your time and take care!
Michelle Erickson, MSW
Social Worker III
Division of Children and Family Services
Wenatchee
Phone: (509) 667-6118
Fax: (509) 664-6358
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
From: cam huegenot [mailto:cameocares@live.com]
Sent: Monday, July 21, 2008 7:46 AM
To: Jeanne Wellbaum; jkoch@co.douglas.wa.us; Erickson, Michelle K. (DSHS/CA); paul_glassen@hotmail.com; pcassel@cbm-law.us; Scanlon, Marie (DSHS/CA); Caballero, Tomas (ATG)
Subject: Letter For Mary Ann McIntosh
Importance: High
For Mary Ann McIntosh,
I do not have a landline phone to use. At all. All I have is a cell phone and I cannot afford the minutes. I can barely afford to call my son everyday, and the state and CPS have done nothing to facilitate this form of visitation. I also do not have the ability to write to you by regular mail as there is no printer, and handwritten notes are not okay for legal documentation which I would have to copy to everyone. It would take too long besides.
I have asked for a continuance, because I've not obtained evidence yet which is crucial to my defense, and because I had to relocate to access these services. I'm also having severe physical problems which need attention and I cannot get medical care in Wenatchee or the Washington area. I'm not having my periods at all, and while this is normal for 1-2 months, under stress, it is NOT normal to persist for 8 months, and to get worse with passing time. There are phsyical damages to my body which need attention and I don't have the legal resources to access law books and write my own motions in proper form. Besides which, the state has already been forced to acknowledge THEY believe I have at least a mild form of PTSD. I have documentation to prove the AG's office, which represnted the state in the Fair Hearing, has knowledge of probably mild PTSD and if you continue to discriminate against me and refuse accomodations for at least disabilities which YOU have claimed to have knowledge of, you will be in a poor position to claim you are acting in the best interests of the mother and son and that you care about reunification or respect our rights to visitation, services, and to be a family.
You must allow time for me to collect evidence, just as any lawyer would do and ask of you.
You must also take into consideration that I am indigent and cannot afford certain resources, which is why I requested reasonable public defense. The key word is reasonable.
It seems to me that you are attempting to avoid giving out your email address so there can be no possible written record of my attempt to communicate with you and ask for cooperation. If you cared about the interests of my son, you would make the necessary accomodations to facilitate communication, and not put up obstacles.
It seems I will have to appeal the actions of this department. I am copying all of these parties so it cannot be claimed no one knew what was going on, and what my attempts were to communicate with you and the court. Any one of you, especially Tomas Caballero, can easily forward these emails onto you, and if he refuses to do so, knowing my circumstances, I can prove accomodations were never made on my behalf.
Cameo Garrett
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