Spiritual and Math "60"

I guess some spiritual things I could mention, for the last couple of weeks at various times, I noticed the presence of the holy spirit. Not laser, or technology, but other. I noticed it very strongly when I went to church not last Sunday but the one before, to the point I was a little shaky. It wasn't nerves or anything, I think it was just someone somewhere praying.

Then a lot of things from the Bible and with placement of things in my house to where it was sort of shocking and I didn't try to do any of it.

I don't really sense it tonight but that doesn't mean there is nothing. And I didn't do my devotion this morning when I usually do for a few minutes at least. So I did tonight, and got another pointer to something, with coincidence and reinforcement of an idea.

I think that's what it is, just a reinforcement to pay closer attention to things. I don't think it means anything for me specifically, but is just bringing attention to the scripture more.

I had clicked on Orinoco Flow by Enya earlier and it wouldn't play. Interference again, when I wanted to hear one song while trying to work on something. Then I wasn't trying to get anything in particular but I opened up my Bible to just read something and got "Waw". So I read "Waw" from a psalm...I think 119? the sort of alphabetical one...will confirm in a moment.

So I read this and tried to focus on it and then decided to go to this Who's who in the Bible book that has figures from scripture and thought I would randomly select one and then think upon it. So straight from Waw I opened up without looking and laid on my finger on...

Hawwa.

Waw. Hawwa.

Eve. Mother of living.

More exactly, life or source of life.

So I looked up "Waw" and it is for the letter "w".

What I first noticed was the sound.

Waw and then Hawwa.

There is a symbol attached and it's for "w" but can also be an "o" vowel sound and in modern times it's "v" sound. Then I noticed, when Orinoco Flow finally played, she sings a "waw" "hawwa" sound.

It sounds so Indian. Not the song, the waw hawwa. It makes me think of Hiawatha and wah ha wey i the scottish song.

So I guess Eve's first name was to match "ish". The match to man-"woman". And then she was given the name Eve later. Adam & Eve. Which is funny, leaving off last with atomic expression.

I wanted to look up atomic expression, predicate logic, because when I followed how it lines up, the atomic expression with the symbol, I thought it was so orderly. It gave a number to everything except the comma. 1, 2, 3, for numbers or symbols, and then when I tried to find out what happened with the skip it was because of the coma. Comma or coma. Whatever.

Anyway, I don't understand everything I read, but I like to try and going through it without getting breaks a path through the thicket. Atomic expression was not hard to grasp but some of the other stuff around it has been because I don't know so many of the symbols.

I've had people say math has changed and it's old math (what I'm reading) but it's still applicable and interesting.

I guess she sings "ah" or aw ahw but it's similiar to the "o" vowel for "w" for the same symbol.

The first time I heard it I think I was 13 years old, whenever it came out. Will Wagler played it for me and I liked it. He was talking about Enya and I had never heard of her before. Then I heard the Orinoco Flow song and I later got it for myself, in the early 90s. I remember playing it at my house that I owned in St. Johns. By then I was in my early 20s.

Anyway.

I wonder how hawwa got to be a name. Why it's hawwa.

Oh, I just went back to read again and her name was "adam" first. At least according to this book, the first designation was simply "adam" for "man" as in "human" and applied to both male and female. Then it was "man" and "woman" (ish and isha) and then adam and eve. It says her husband gives the name Eve to her as a play on words when they leave the Garden of Eve and it means "to live" and then designates how she will give life.

I guess it is the predicate (?) for motherhood. Or maybe just symbolizes that despite punishment, the destiny is "to live" and she is the first.

Maybe the pronunciation is more "way" then waw? but in the original scripture it's waw. I think it might also go as way or wey like yaweh, yawway, hawweh, hah-way. Anyway, it's also used in other cultures and religions, the word is, aside from judaism or christianity. yahweh is very close to hahweh.

There's my linguistic lesson of the day.

I thought to go to Genesis. Just now, at 11:12 or so. I wanted to find where "man" is first mentioned and it's on the 6th day which corresponds to the number 6 in the alphabet. I first saw, when looking up the symbol for waw, that it is listed in the hebrew alphabet (old version maybe?) as the 6th letter. And then later, a few minutes ago, I then rechecked Genesis and it's man created on the 6th day, given "life". Man is made in the image of God, therefore, correspondence.

Jah? Yaw?

See, math can be fun.

I take this book here, the who's who, with a grain of salt. Not everything is perfect in it but something like this is good for generating ideas. When I first looked at it I started from the beginning, not in random order or anything, just perused it.

I was given an "F" in Math 60. Anyone know that? Yeah, it was the same year some European English guy quipped in the diplomatic cables about the end of "Who's Who". It was 1994, that cable. I was put into Who's Who of some kind or asked to be included, for 1992 or something and for some reason, this cable stood out to me, thanks to the lovely man who is being chased around for wikileaks. Not sure why it came to mind again, but it did, when I recently looked at this transcript and saw this "F" from 1994 college math 60, which was not even college algebra. It upset me actually, because I remembered exactly what was going on at that time.

I remember I had signed up for this class thinking I needed a refresher and then I withdrew from it after a week or so because it was far too slow. The professor didn't acknowledge my withdrawal and gave me an "F" which I tried to contest and they kept saying I had to go through the teacher. I never got an "F" and had hardly any time in the class at all. I had taken full year geometry as a freshman in high school, then full year algebra as a sophomore in high school, then algebra II as a junior (which was very similiar to trig) and then I opted not to take any math my senior year when I was assigned to take trig and never failed a class.

Then I went to New Jersey. Lovely place, that. I was in this town called Livingston, New Jersey. "To Life!" (oh! it's gonna be a gooood life, it's gonna be a good life, a good, good, life...trailing...?) lice or life or lisa? So I went from Bedminster as a nanny in 1993 to Livingston in 1994 and my objective was to go to Sweet Briar or one of these girlish colleges. As I was straight out of high school, they wanted SATs. So I took it, not like all my friends, who took prep courses and paid money to be tutored first. I didn't even open up a Cliff's guide on the SAT. I didn't prepare at all, and just took it. I scored high in percentiles in verbal and english (even for the privileged of Livingston, because the results were weighted according to the demographics of where you took the test. So, for example, someone with less opportunities taking the test in a private school monied area would come out ranking further down than if they'd taken the test where they actually went to school and gained their education. For me, it was in Sherwood, Oregon, not Livingston, NJ). I scored high despite who I was competing with but because I hadn't taken any math for over one year, combined with zero understanding of how the SAT worked, and only average grades in my college prep math, I scored crazily low.

I think someone ran with that and thought they could take advantage of me by portraying me as stupid, on a record.

Because right after this test, I went back to Oregon and it was still 1994 and I thought, well, I scored so low bc I've had zero math, I didn't have a calculator with me like 100% of the other students I was taking the test with, and I need a refresher course.

I never had a calculator, all through high school. All my friends did and it was used in class but all the way through, I didn't have one. So with test-taking, it slowed me down obviously, with other factors. It's not like English, where you just whip out your intuitive answers and write an essay.

So I signed up for this Math 60 class and it was SO SLOW I zoned out and knew it wasn't the right class for me. I dropped it immediately but since it was my first term in college in my entire life, I didn't get the proof I had formally dropped it right away. So they gave me an "F" even though I was never there, and then put an "E" next to it. What the "E" was for I can only imagine.

Since I knew it was too slow and dropped it, I later tried a Math 75 and it was also too slow and I dropped this one, formally, and they still gave me an "F" even though it was a drop I made in the first couple of weeks.

So basically, someone was determined to stick the F's in math with me. They weren't mine.

Then, just recently, I found someone went BACK into my record and added all these "F's" to history classes. Those were never there before and they are all new and when, in the last few years while being distracted, it was done (at community college level) I have no idea, but I never got an "F" in history. It was regular U.S. history stuff.

I had one problem with a teacher claiming I plaigerized a paper which I never plaigerized, for an English class, and aside from this, I didn't have other problems at this time, with community college. All the "F"s in history I received were backdated after I was raped actually. I am pretty sure. Because that happened in 1998 and at that time I had no F's assigned to history classes and when I took history later, I didn't get F's either. I have to go back and investigate that.

Then, in 2002, I took Art History. I took it after studying religious history at the monastery. I started with ancient art but was blocked from going further than this in these classes.

Before this, at the community college, I remember a guy from England, or who said he was "English" stalking me and that was interesting. He was very tall and handsome and he hated my guts and watched my every move--I couldn't figure out why.

Later, while still at PSU, same thing with some legal clerk later, in 2003 I think, stalking me at this diner-pub and same thing.

But at any rate, not to go on a tangent, I was definitely being "Stuck" with some "F's" that I never got. Seriously. I fought that first "F" for a long time until they forced me to give up because I was just ignored. I wasn't even in the class.

My guess is that someone knew about my low math score from the SAT and then they tried to build upon that, as if this was a true foundation. But it was not the truth, and things done to me and written or documented about me have not been the truth very often. I guess no one thought I could contest a written record so when I ended up being successful in college or handling 2 lawsuits at the same time as successful college, they didn't want me to look that smart.

Torture is a great way to dumb someone down.

When someone starts to blog, it must be threatening to the status quo that has wanted someone to seem stupid, immoral, or whatever too. It is no wonder the FBI refuses to give me discovery of my own records about my own person when they've allowed countless others to assault me, harass my entire family, slander and defame me by internal and external domestic and international methods, and then tortured me as well.

It's been religious hate crime and some kind of weird political strategy that amounts to nothing more than anti-competition and torture of the fittest.