Sunday, August 31, 2008

My Afternoon Activities

I put my running shoes on hold and signed up for a running group in D.C.

I went to several bookstores in town and familiarized myself with their books and I skimmed through several books about Diana. My impression? she had a bunch of vultures capitalizing on their imagined "friendship" with her. I have some theories about Diana after some of what I've read, not only about her alleged "mental illness" but about who she was afraid of before she died.

This woman had circumstantial depression and problems, but removed from the bizarre stressors she was under, there was nothing wrong with her. This woman was incredibly sane considering what was going on. At any rate, I am going to write my little psychoanalysis and impressions after I get to a better wi-fi station.

I still need to do my TTSOML posts too. But I took some time for myself today instead, and read books and listened to music. Sade, Tori Amos, and yes, Def Leppard. I really feel like singing tonight. Or right now. I wish I had a gig. I've responded to some Craigslist ads for musicians and need to make some contacts to get the art/music thing going here.

I also found a couple of other things in common with Di while reading. She and I both broke our arms as little girls, though I don't know which one she broke. I broke my left arm. She broke hers while riding horses and I broke mine while swinging from a tree. And she and I both used Winnie-the-Pooh stationary and cards for notes to our kids. Also, she co-slept with her sons.

This is a woman who knew her stuff. She educated herself on the things she wanted to know about. She wrote a dossier on landmines, doing her own research and proving the British government was profiting from not cleaning up landmine sites or something like that. I, on the other hand, wrote a "dossier" on the Catholic church and vicarious liability of the Archdiocese to abuse committed by parish priests and monastic clergy.

She believed it was possible for doctors to cover things up, and I have personally HAD this happen, and live to even talk about it, even if I have to fight being discredited by crap about mental illness. I had my medical records stolen, and then totally "re-written" and I even had a false report of drug use added to my records where no one told me about it, and I found out about it later, after signing to obtain my records. At that time, it was impossible to have tested positive for drugs because I never used them, and never had in my entire life. Not until after my son was taken away from me did I try a drug, and it was pot, and I only tried it to see if it helped migraines. That's very recent. Prior to that, there was nothing. But my medical records were being rewritten by hospital doctors whom I later found out were quite often members of the Cahtolic church, and whose hospital had Catholic affiliation. I hadn't known until later, until my records got screwed up.

Besides which, how can anyone say Diana was "paranoid" when she had countless incidents of people accessing her phone conversations and other things? That's not paranoia. That's being rational, given the circumstances. One of her first lovers was killed "accidentally" in a collision after he had threatened to expose his affair with Diana. Diana believed he was assassinated, basically. Maybe he wasn't, but I don't think she should be written off so hastily. It's claimed the woman recounted her beliefs (Di did) after some friend pointed out the unliklihood that a 17 year old would be an accomplice. Give me a break. 17 year olds, throughout the history of time, have been known to do things. 18 year old men go to fucking war and kill people all the time. You just fucking never know. I'm not saying it's very likely, but until proven absolutely impossible, it's not an impossible theory. Perhaps somewhat improbable, but many of Di's predictions came true. She knew something was up. I trust her to have been in touch with her instincts, even if she couldn't exactly put her finger on what was happening. This woman was totally trashed, moreso than most people who even like her imagine.

I also want to look into some of her religious connections more closely, or those who were connected to her and were religious.

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