I'm so not pregnant.
Don't get me wrong, I'm responsible, but things break.
While I would have been absolutely fascinated to see what sort of progeny I and my ex could have created together, I am relieved. Last night someone dedicated a song to me. It was "Laid" by James.
I watched the video on YouTube. Ohmifrickin'gawwwwwwwwwwd. It's HIM. That guy in the video is my ex! The one checking out his bloodshot eyes, hand-cuffed to the table, er, by the table. and all the mannerisms are even the same. Even the collapsing posturing. It's like he studied this character and learned it well.
Like I said, I do believe it could have been a great human genome experiment to discover what genetic gem could have been conjured, but I am not in tears about it.
I'm totally fine. But what is strange, is that a chemistry sort of developed. A couple of times I actually felt something like attraction or lust--hitting me from afield--around him. And I DO care about him and would have tried something out if he wasn't already working himself out. Then, sometimes, he's an absolute embarressment, just as I'm sure I've been to him. Most of the time--brilliant, and then other times, umm.... I really truly care about him though, and worry about him. Worry what he's doing to himself in his sleep and before sleep.
Ohmifrikin'... I just watched the video again. The likeness is absolutely unCANNY. My ex even has the same kind of facial scruff. Okay, even the lyrics fit. And then watching this guy, he drums the table with a kitchen butter knife or something, and looks exactly my ex. He even wears a similiar black/white ensemble.
The part where he says, "You drive me CRAZY...when are you coming home?" is exactly like him. That timid for a moment look, and then at the end, with his hand to his head and arm on the table, and sideways look up and down, it's HIM!!!!!!
For a minute I had to look more closely at James, to be sure it's not actually my ex, and that my ex is now moonlighting for an undercover role in a movie.
I really like James. It's humiliating, but I didn't know who he was until yesterday. And he's old, not new. Every single time I watch this video of "Laid" I laugh out loud. I really wish this "ex" who wasn't really an ex in the most usual sense of the word, well. I'm glad I still see him and hope we'll be friends. He's got my back on a lot of things, and I will reapy in kind. I don't blame him for his issues anymore than I hope to be blamed for my own issues. Everybody has issues. Just have to find the person whose issues are compatible with your own and help eachother. Friends or more.
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