Wednesday, November 23, 2011

My Parent's Predictions Today & Photos

I still have to go back and put photos of my mom up and I have european cookies and servers on my laptop that I have to disable and get rid of.

Hope you all enjoyed the show. jk. There was no "show". I just took lots of photos of things. It wasn't of me mainly either, but for artistic expression.

Today I took a ton of photos and got into doing some experimental modern angles and used lighting and a lot of random stuff. It was such a fun outlet that I forgot to eat all day...I just drank coffee and had a handful of raisins. I realized later, it was a close approximation to how I like painting to music and just feeling it. I like to FEEL the art. And when I feel it, I get so lost in it that I forget to eat, and I thought this is a very good sign. Then, I witnessed more of what my parents can do, and did tonight. And I am going to write about it in this post.

A lot of my photos got archived but I got some really amazing shots. Really amazing. I think the best stuff I can do, is creating or having an eye for beauty in chaos.

My place, by the way, looks like a zoo. It's a disaster. I was just digging through stuff and finding this and made a huge creative mess and my place smells like some strange fungicide or fumigation thing (like I talked about in the past) and chinese spices.

But in all of the mess, I had so much fun and got some really good photos. First I tried to just feel being symbolic and prayed God would direct me to just do whatever and photograph myself and I did, and got some interesting stuff, and then I was focusing on abstraction and modern art and making a composition. I got some gorgeous stuff, and then it quit taking anymore photos. It said storage was full. So I had gone up to 999 photos and the rest were archived and in storage files. So I have a lot of insignificant photos too, blurry or of nothing. So I am deleting these and then saving the other stuff.

I just used the laptop webcam and it's not great. Believe me. But I was practically dancing all over while clicking away and had music on and I just had a lot of fun with it.

It was a good little break.

And I was tortured today. Sometime after the morning when I was taking photos, someone started it up. It's like they got off work and decided to turn it on or just started it up for whatever. And it's being done here tonight, at my place and at my parent's house.

My parent's guessed more stuff correctly and the thing is, I am not gifted like that so I know that I must miss almost all of it.

But I saw some stuff and I will write about it. Also, I cracked up laughing...just laughing and laughing, when I got back to my house. There was this hilarious joke in all of it.

My Dad had been playing different clips of music from his piano, the electronic one, and there was this one section where it went off-note, like something got tweaked with the sound, like a dead battery sound or mic is facing the speaker squeal sound. And I got back to my place and did a few things and thought, "What a mess!" and then I got some things straigthened out and saw this little train that reminds me of my son, my thomas the train one, and I picked it up and the music was so loud I didn't hear the first thing that sounded when I pressed it, but then I held it up to my ear and pressed it again and it was the chooooo-chooooo! sound and it says nothing, is just a sound like the sounds my Dad was playing on his electric piano, and it went choooo-CHooooo!" but made this totally off-note, I think bc I got water in it by accident. And I pressed it again and it said "I'm Thomas! the #1 blue engine!" and I started laughing so hard.

My Dad knew this toy train was going to make this sound, and he played the exact same thing on his keyboard first. It cracked me up and I couldn't stop laughing.

2. blanket. My parents had a blanket folded a certain way on this one chair and I felt too afraid to even do anything when I was there at first but today I had prayed whatever I do, if I miss the mark, God will correct it and have something good happen,. So I tried to remember this in feeling free with how I photographed things and myself even. And then I decided, why be afraid if you really trust God. So I started doing what I would do and played more with the dog and then had this other blanket over my head and was hiding from hiim and hiding his toys. And then after we were done playing, I threw it back on the chair and stared. It ended up folded, sort of sitting upright just like the other one. It was a green blanket with a sheep fleece on the inside and the other one was crimson or whatever and I threw it up there and lo! it landed JUST like the other one, sitting up and folding in. I could not believe it. So I left it. They anticipated the way my blanket would fold. I couldn't believe it. It wasn't like, crumpled in a heap. It was sitting up like a sheaf of wheat (haha jk, no torture now). Well, anyway, it symbolized nothing, it is just proof of what they can do. I feel I shouldn't write about all of it and why is the U.S. torturing us so I do? I feel I have to defend us by explaining.

3. Apple pie with the V and forest fire impressions.
Then, I was sitting there and after I'd just taken some really cool photos that, in the abstract, looked just like a forest fire in the distance with water or a field below, it was this really cool fire effect I created with my flashlight and a bag of hyssop turned upside down and I can't remember if I was using a compact mirror too, but it was a landscape. And it looked like rocks in front of this or maybe diamonds...I couldn't decide. It was definitely a fire, and then I was at my parents
house and said I needed matches and started trying the clickers and they were't working until I used the one that said "calico" and I said "it's child-proofed" and I was thinkig about how I was almost named calico and cali is a nickname and means clear or light or something like that I think, I can't remember but I was thinkig of light and then it lit and my mom said turn it off. I did and then I grabbed these Fire Starter Loggs and they had the same thing on the box that was in the photos I had just taken. It was forest fire images, and when I slid the box to me, I accidentally hit this wrench and it opened up into a V, facing me exactly the way this V on the apple pie was, that my mother had made an incision of. I saw the apple pie and wondered why she had put this mark on it and then I was sitting by the fire and slid over these fire loggs, and the wrench opened up into a V. The same way it was on the counter, it was there at my feet, or knees, right there. It looked like a forest fire but some of the photos made me think of Moses and the burning bush. It was on top of this hyssop that looked like a dry bush and then there was a fire burning on the top, and then I changed the angle and it was a forest fire landsccape. It was the Canada-U.S. box of fire starters, like emergency supply box. I had the words for hyssop turned upside down and it looked like a different language. It was upside down.

I realized they knew or marked this pie bc this other thing would happen.

There were a lot of other things, and they predicted when I'd cough, or how many times, about 15 minutes or more before I did. There was a LOT, but I think I missed most of it. It's just a little bit of it.

I also had some flashbacks of my own today while taking photos. I had created a kaliesescope at one point, with seeds and herbs and they shone through like little crystals and jewels and I got this amazing set where these flower petals look like a heart. First, they were shining through my fingers and looked like loose diamonds and jewels. And then I got some with the flashlight looking like a blue tunnel with a light emanating or flashing from the tunnel and the flower petal in my hand shaped up like a miniature heart or organ, and the light caught it from backlighting and lit it up so it glowed, like a glowing heart in front of the entrance to the tunnel. Then, while doing this, I turned my hand down and a green leaf clover shaped onto my palm. I was stunned, and wondered how or why and then found out there was a round green bottle cap on the keyboard of my laptop and somehow the webcam picked up the glare of the green cap and it got distorted into a green clover leaf. It looked like kidneys or a heart. I thought about 2 people--Princess diana's heart and my Uncle Howards kidneys and heart. At some point, it came strongly to me--Uncle Howard. It was the shape. At first it looked like roses, and then one beautiful red and crimson rose and all of a sudden, it had two sides, like kidneys.

It didn't result from rosehips or seedless rosehips. I had used hibiscus petals.

It was really beautiful. First, it was these loose little jewels and it was an arch, a semi-circle arch, and on the outside of the arch which then looked like a tunnel, then there was this triangle framing the semi-circle and then it was loose jewels, like tiny little diamonds or tiny little round precious stones, sparkling, in the palm of my hand, and sparkling in the light and then they grew, as I turned my hand closer (the webcam was stationary so it was with my hand and placement and totally random) and they grew into roses. And then this one rose that I focused on, it changed and turned into a heart or kidneys and had this glowing inner quality. It was glowing from the inside.

The process had the most impact for me, personally. Right after I was thinking about this, and looking at this, and watching what I saw, then after I stayed there, looking and thinking, it's a tunnel with a bright flash and a glowing heart and then thinking of my Uncle Howard who just died, and then I had seen all this and turned my hand again and I had a green leaf clover on my hand instead.

After I did this with hibiscus, I got out other spices and was going to make more experimental photos and tried one powder but it wouldn't show well and was yellow, so then I went to coriander seed and put the flashlight into the bag so they spread out like beads across the flashlight surface and they turned, like a kaliedescope. Then I used the hyssop and turned it upside down and that's when I got the fire on top of the dry hyssop which made me think about hyssop, and hyssop in general and I turned it upside down and there was a fire that looked like it came from the top and the letters looked like a different language.

Before that, I got some really cool juxpositions with Reader's Digest and copies of envelopes from FBI and things. And I thought about Yulia from Ukraine today. I didn't plan it that way. And I didn't even know her name even, until I saw news a month ago that she was a prime minister in jail and when I looked her up she was this really beautiful one that wore her hair up in braids.

I didn't put my hair up this way, thinking of her. I braided my hair and wrapped it around my head, not thinking of anyone at all--just thinking, it's raining and my hair is so long and what should I do with it today? So I braided it on both sides and then decided I'd wrap it around and it wraps twice and then I even have length to tie it together into a knot. I set out a red v-neck sweater and brown courderoys and had my cream shirt beneath with this boo-boo shirt over it and all you can see frm the v line is "AB". That's from the lettering on the top. Then I used this bright red scarf and had this little red fake flower like the English one, and I decided to pin it to the scarf with the safety pin showing.

I don't know. I don't know what I was doing. I just asked God to please correct whatever i did wrong that caused problems and God knows who they are who love him, but that doesn't always mean things work out for them I know. Or for me. But I had this on, and my red lipstick and light maskara and put in my sneakers, and then at one point, maskara got into my eye and teared up so I let it run and when I saw the black maskara had run I left it. It looked like a black eye.

So, to symbolize what is happening to my parents, I left the black eye. And I put a pen in my hair that says "parker" on the inside. I wasn't really sure what I was doing but just wearing what I wanted and not personally putting anything into my idea at all, but then I had the royals, and My Mom and Dad and family, and Yulia come to my mind when I was taking photos. At one point, I felt I was sort of representing Lorraine Rose. I felt it took on different ideas...I mean, when I had the windex in the background, and pure shine by hask in my hand, and FBI envelope, I thought of her. But I wasn't trying to represent at all. Just different ideas of what has led to torture of my family.

I took some shots of ads from Readers' Digest like "What you don't know could kill you" with holding an envelope with an address from Portland FBI.

I got out knives then, first just one knife. I used it to represent my Mom being cut. So I put the blade against my cheek and at my neck to represent for my Dad. The first one had UK on the label and then I was playing with the camera bc it was showing a reflection from my sticker that I usually use to hide my webcam and it has partial words of IRIG and RMS and ACORN and SQUASH. Some of it got turned around, so irig looked like giri. And then I held it out over the cam and got an illusion of a blade extending from the other side and ended up with myself looking like I was pointing something like a USB cable at someone's eye. Like a mini laser. Then, the blade that had green and white and black on it and sort of looked like an Irish theme, turned into a blade with crimson down it, from the reflection of my sweater. Then it kept picking up turquoise light from somewhere so it was me in a red sweater and a turquoise light and when I waved the blade or sometimes moved it slowly, the blade turned into a sheer gleam of a light like a light saber. And all of a sudden, I looked like Princess Lei with a light saber. I mean, obviously, I'm not a princess or lei, but I had these braids on my head and the knife turned into a light saber. A turquoise one. Then I took out a knife with a blade from Taiwan and did more work with it and a green one too but it was dull. Then I combined 2 together and 3 for different effects. I had a turquoise saber, a green saber, and I think a blue saber. It was never red when I moved it though. It was only crimson when it was connected at both ends, like the Red Sea.

And then at one point, when I turned the blade, it turned into a wooden bridge. A plank. It had picked up the wooden cupboards and turned the entire blade into a wood bridge. It was a straight wooden bridge. Like a plank bridge or a diving board idea. And then I was still turning the blade, and it picked up my face in the blade from a different mirror. It was some other mirror that randomly picked up my face from a distance and then my face was smaller, bc it was from a mirror somewhere else, and small enough to fully fit on the blade, even though I had the blade obscuring the entire lens.

At one point, I took the inside of the pen that said "parker" out of the white case and held one end and the other metal part that looked like a mercury thermometer and it looks like a thermometer. Its sort of weird.

I grabbed a couple business cards and article idea and put them together, just random, for art's sake, and nothing more. One, I just grabbed it not thinking and it ended up being a checkered cab print with a Vanderbilt card next to it and right next to this, was a receipt I had that said on the bottom "mybkexperience" and after I grabbed it and it was randomly like this. I also grabbed my Bible and had some print photographed and didn't even look. I don't know how they turned out, but I know that I checked twice and once, the first time, it was on the prophet jeremiah being falsely accused or oppressed. Then it was on something from Matt about people saying Jesus must have a demon and he's challenged, and then the other was solomon's dedication and the ark is returned and that was the last one I did, the fourth one. I don't know what one of them was bc I didn't look, just snapped it.

Last night before I went to bed I read about how Jesus healed a man from a royal family and people said he was possessed with demons or ill, and he wasn't--it was possible bc Jesus gave the glory and credit back to God. The man came to him and said please come with us and Jesus said go, your son is healed and he believed it was true and left. It was the 7th hour when he met a steward on the way and the person said, "YOUR SON HAS BEEN healed!" and he asked when, and it had been the 7th hour, which was the exact same time Jesus said it would happen.

And because of this miracle, the entire family believed in God and became believers.

Others though, got increasingly jealous of Jesus. They tried to discredit him by saying he was like a criminal and didn't obey the law, and had fellowship with sinners, and that it was a demon, not the spirit of God. They even tried to say he was mentally ill. And both religious and others attacked him for it.

So I realized, it's important sometimes for me to get the time right if I'm talking about a time of something, bc maybe it matters to someone, and could increase their faith.

My parents are not superstitious and neither am I. We believe in miracles and have been oppressed for a few of us having gifts.

At any rate, when I was taking photos here, I didn't have much problem until I photographed myself holding a Judicial Misconduct book. I made a shot of myself looking like I'm behind bars too, with Yulia in mind. What's weird, is that I had ALL these people, in Wenatchee esp., trailing me and in Seattle to, trying to make references to her and I never once picked up on it. I read she went by "Yu" for short or something and thought, "You have to be kidding. Are these people so malicious and paranoid that they think since I look at the back of a Starbucks cup which says YOU or a gatorade bottle with the same big YOU on it, someone must think it's about her." I advise giving it a rest. My parents are fine. But some of the people out there are just false prophets and liars who tried to delude a lot of people and get a headstart on something.

I'm going to put up the photos of my Mom and that woman Lisa side by side, from my other post, and I'll work on more RD stuff and some of the horrible things they put in their magazine, to basically, no mistake, get to my family.

And then I found out the editor is strongly Roman Catholic.

By the way, I'm still wondering why my Ex, Alvaro Pardo, attempted to get me to talk about sexual or intimate things over the telephone after we broke up. It wasn't something he was into, and I've never done this, and never even in person. Richard Whittemore fully lied about me. I've never felt comfortable writing anything "sexually explicit" and I've never talked this way in a romantic setting with anyone, and I've also never done this over the phone. Oh, once I had a practical conversation while traveling but it wasn't racy.

At the time, I sensed that he was setting me up. Or someone else was asking him to do it, to set me up and make me look and sound bad. I refused. I said I wasn't getting into squidgygate. Not only would I never do this, for security and personal reasons, bc anyone would/could overhear.

But I also felt, if my Ex never wanted something like that before, why would he be trying to pull this out of me NOW?

Like, who is on the other line or waiting to tape it to share with others? I knew someone put him up to it. I knew it. So for me, it makes the sincerity of the entire thing, suspect.

In every single way, I have had people trying to disqualify me from my good name and reputation.

It points back to who originally wanted to defame me and recreate the facts of my life and the perception others have of me.

I accept responsibility for my swearing and reactions to being literally tortured and watching my own child suffer and family be exploited and tortured. I do.

But I am tired of the constant attempts to falsely arrest me, or make me sound like what was printed about me fits, or that the slander of my character and mental health fits.

It's time to ask the FBI why they are protecting my Ex. They are protecting him and whoever he is connected with, but allowed my entire family to be brutally attacked. It was a continuum of the same, and involved the same men and women who originally had something to hide to begin with. It was hate crime. I split up with him and the GOVERNMENT allowed hate crime and torture to continue.

It's hate crime. And he was involved. My Ex was involved. If he hadn't been part of hate crime, then it wouldn't have been possible that everyone quit torturing us and decided to happily and viciously pick it up again when we broke up. So it's more like a deal that the CIA or FBI had with him and his buddies and their own buddies, and then they punished my entire family when I decided I needed more time before making such a commitment.

So Colombia is involved.

Which is only interesting, in my opinion, in that Diana was last in Colombia before getting killed. They have more landmine interests than most.

I don't even know where he is, if he's in the U.S. or back in Colombia or what. I have no idea. But the FBI is backing HIM and not my family. The only reason the FBI would do this, and halt torture, is if they personally felt they were getting something out of it.

It's like someone told my family everything was great and would work out or be better and they were lying the entire time. Torturing us even, to push us to the limits, and then lying. The FBI is the organization responsible for putting a halt to any kind of torture or hate crime against Americans. They were happy to do this, if I was with him.

What's it to you FBI?

How about you CIA? Department of State?

You've allowed people to be used and tortured in your own country. So it's a continuum of the same. There was never any great plan or miracle or idea. My parents and family and friends are great and have very good intuition, but I was there. I know. I know how to tell if there is some kind of odd motive behind another thing.

I know when the flags are going up bc there is something that another group has planned. I mean, I did love him, at that time, over time more, cared about him, but something was up and sure enough!

Sure enough.

The old switcharoo. Most likely, it was an abatement of torture only for purposes of trying to do something even worse to me or get me out of the way or further disqualify me from my good name.

What's scary, is that I know for a fact the U.S. government is involved, because hate crime is controlling things right now. The scary thing is that they had no problem managing the hate crime problem if I was with him. But if I wasn't, whoa. The FBI was assaulting me at an Irish pub in Seattle, WA. Can I see a photo line-up? I'd like to see a photo line-up of FBI employees, because I'm positive that I can make some positive identifications. I have this intuitive feeling.

Not everyone who says they're Catholic is Catholic either, and I'm not saying that about my Ex, but about someone else I knew who lied to me.

I'd like to know about Marshall Mathers. Because he was targeted by the FBI and he's protestant and FBI is mainly Catholic. I knew his cousin from high school. I didn't figure it out until years later, but just because I knew her, it would be interesting to know if someone went after him or anyone I might know at about the same time they were trying to insult and ruin my own family. We didn't know them at all, but the FBI and hate crime groups didn't necessarily know that. He had to leave and went to England for awhile. Like Monica Lewinsky.

England is not an option for me. But I'd sort of like to know when it was that Marshall Mathers was being chased out of this country by the FBI. It worked for them--I mean, they regrouped themselves, and you know it can get really bad if even people with money have to take drastic action sometimes to escape persecution.

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