I almost ended up wearing what my Dad wore and almost put on peach and blue with a blue jacket turned out, or was going to wear blue sweatshirt (still might if it stays cold) but instead I wore all black on top and brown courderoys. I might change to my blue later today just for something different but I don't know. I later put on another sweater and my only scarf bc it's freezing outside and when it's not raining I sometimes like to word process at an outdoor table. I have a small glass table outside on my porch. Changed to my dark green turtleneck, brown courderoy with black stretch neath and cream fleece on top. Changed my socks too bc they were wet, from b&w to pink fuzzies. I was too bundled up in stiffer layers earlier so changed. I wore my "heidi" braids around my head with a little pen to a side holding it together and then a tiny crimson rubberband at the ends. I used to french braid my hair all the time when I was younger. I've been french braiding since the 80s and then in the 90s and have done twisties in my hair or I guess what's called "crown" braiding, but right now, heidi braids are so fast and don't look too bad. For some reason, I remember Lorraine Rose was disturbed to see me with french braided hair--I did it myself, and I remember she was bothered by it. She said you must have had someone do that for you and I said no I learned a long time ago. I think someone showed me too, how they did it, in elementary school or when I was in jr. high actually. I wanted to know and picked it up. I think I got a book later too and tried to learn other kinds but I settled for french braiding and did this down the center of my hair, and also on the sides, which was crownbraiding but I didn't know it was called that. I sort of think this schoolmate named Anita Valdez showed me but I can't remember for sure. It was by at least jr. high but maybe earlier. Anita was my elementary school friend.
I save money for my family by wearing lots of layers at turning heat off at night, but then lately there has been condensation inside so I am also mindful of keeping things dry so they don't warp, which then gives me a break from being cold too! or wearing as many layers.
I found out I had a ceiling vent opened when I was wearing about 10 different layers, and tons of blankets and was still cold. Oh! haha....ahem...I didn't know I had that open...so that's maybe why?
However, I did something new for me, in my lifetime since I've been here.
I heated the outdoors!
"Don't heat the outdoors!" "Keep the door shut if you're heatin the ..." and "Are you closing off the rooms? because it will heat better that way.."
All my life I've known not to heat the outdoors but several weeks ago, I wanted to type outside and work outside even though it was freezing cold. So I took my space heater outdoors!
I heated my feet outdoors.
At first I felt a little guilty but then it was this guilty pleasure because I reasoned, "Well, I can either heat the indoors where I don't want to be at the moment, or I can heat the outdoors where my feet will stay warm and I'm getting a little sunlight and fresh air." And, I figured, it doesn't cost more, because if I put it on one setting, it doesn't overwork. I have to keep it running indoors and it never stays warm enough, so why not use it immediately outdoors?
I don't know why I'm writing about this, but it was a great idea.
I had cup after cup of tea and then sometimes I had coffee, but I made a lot of tea and put it in a canister and just drank lots of tea and worked.
Actually, I might do this again bc my feet are freezing.
Yesterday I got the idea to bring in a huge branch of myrtle into my house. I might turn it around and adjust it though, because I have to make sure it doesn't fall. Where it's at now isn't permanent.
I feel like today and yesterday maybe, after sensing a good feeling with God or something, something has been trying to wreck it. I sang some songs one night even and I felt it. The night before Thanksgiving night I think. It was just right there and then I have felt the last 2 days more like, everything is fine--no difference with me personally, but more of a distraction or sense that voodoo and witchcraft are trying to mess with things. I don't know what, but something maybe. I don't know. And someone had quit torturing as much and then they picked it up again. So whoever is doing this, is definitely not in good standing with God.
But it was day after Thanksgiving that I dragged this myrtle into my house. I read the following scriptures and passages and got the idea.
Someone is burning me now. Laser technology. And I guess it's because I wrote I didn't "feel it" and they thought they could try to torture and manufacture something. It's laser. And they started it up just about 10 minutes after I wrote the passage about when I sensed something.
Like I said, you can't imitate it, and it doesn't have to be a physical feeling. I wasn't even referring to a physical feeling in that situation either, I was describing a different kind of connection.
No one using technology to torture and call it research is ever going to get it. Not unless they experience it themselves bc then they wouldn't be torturing people.
I can't find the passage right now, but it's about taking olive leaves and olive branches and branches of myrtle and making booths for a 7 day celebration or some kind of ceremony. The only part I remember is the part about the kinds of branches and making booths. I had already walked by a huge myrtle branch broken off so I thought, it would be a good idea to take it in and make the house smell better. So that's what I did.
I also read from Proverbs and a few other passages. No big deal.
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someone, a woman, thinking pink and green and holding a brooch. I don't know what colors, I think more primary with some white, but she was holding a rhinestone studded or gem-studden brooch. It was about 4:50 p.m. and irregular, not perfectly geometric, and it was being turned to the left if you were the one looking at it and holding it.
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I don't know if my parents knew what I'd do today or not. Have no idea. I changed before 4 p.m. after layering up more because my layers were too stiff. So I got to their house at 5 p.m. or a little earlier actually, with a copy of the April 2005 Reader's Digest issue in hand, & keys because I want to take a photo from it maybe. Saw the last part of Seinfeld here and then a little news about supplies not getting through in Pakistan, and football now.
Earlier today I was in the mood to go hiking somewhere but I didn't know where or who with and then my parents were out. So I typed outside. I feel I've slowed down though and not focused and I'm not happy about it. Obviously, from the photos, I was drugged at some point. Drugs or meds make me look crazy. I start feeling halfway normal and then I get medicated, and it was on that one day that I mentioned.
I got the same name, same day of birth but it was for a likeness for someone else, thinking of them, not a name. Sort of a name.
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I am sitting by the fire and there was a piece of wood here and then I got a mug for tea and after I accidentally overboiled it, it left the same shape on the mug, on one side. On the other side it has the shape of what is lying on the hearth there, things lying out and stripes like on the starter log box. I photographed and will post here.
I am sitting with my back to the fire and to my left hand, is the wood and the starters and then to my right hand is the piece of wood and a photo of the mug with the marks on it.
My parents never set out a piece of wood like this, by itself, so I figured it was for a reason and then after I noticed the mark on my cup, I saw it matched. Here's the symmetry...the wood piece is the upside-down version of the mark on the cup. Then, the triangles next to the starters, are next to eachother and have the inverse pattern too.
It's not a good photo of the mark bc in person it's much darker and defined, just like the wood piece. But it fits.
So that's the second time in a row.
I haven't put the other photos up yet, about the piece of foil, bc I have to go backwards and do this and add it.
If you face the fire, the starters to the right, cup and piece of wood to the left. But no difference, it's just that it matches what was laid out ahead of time. I didn't even know I was going to make tea for sure, just had some with me in my pocket. I had 2 bags in my first cup, of earth tea with lipton, and then in my second cup, same thing. But I didn't overboil the 2nd one bc I didn't want the shape to change before I photographed it. It was maybe about 6 p.m. when I noticed, around this time. Right now, with this update, it's 6:28 p.m.
2. $2.
I took the RD into the house and it has a rolled up wad of cash with $2 on the outside. My Mom pulled up and I opened the door for her and she said, pointedly, "I have your money" and it was $2. A little change, but $2 which I then set on top of the digest which says "never run out of money". Hahah. I am putting up those photos of my mom's card and this other woman tonight.
3. Blackened stove left and my teeth.
Somehow, my Mom or Dad knew my teeth would turn blackish and that I'd say something about it. I think I realized it was from balsamic vinegrette I had but I was upset and then noticed, it matches the exact same kind of appearance of stain on their stove. Brushed twice and that helped but I have to do it again. It wasn't just a black stove...it was sort of speckled, which reminds me...
4. Eucalyptus spots and mat.
My mom turned a mat upside down and it's sort of leopard spotted on the underside. So I realized, this is the exact same thing that happened to the eucalyptus wood I tore off and took into my house. I hadn't thought of it and then noticed and realized, oh my gosh, I must have splashed something on this but then I realized it's resin and what happens to this kind of wood. It exactly matches the mat. I peeked under it the other day and it was "Welcome" upside down. It was just the welcome mat, but anyone, it's a match with the eucalyptus.
5. Also, tea bag string swirl.
Last night I had tea at their house and this black thread string swirled into the same exact design that a tea string ended up in my cup. Exact. I had torn the little paper tag off off of a teabag so it was just a string in a circle. A black thread had been under a washcloth and when I washed dishes for them I didn't realize it was there and it moved and swirled on it's own, and ended up there on that side, and then the same thing was inside my cup. It wasn't that someone tried to do this, it randomly occured and I noticed. It's possible it was that way under the cloth and someone already knew my tea string would formm the same design, I don't know.
6. Mom cleaning.
She was cleaning before I left tonight but didn't have to bc I'd done some for her. Then I went to my place and had to wash dishes in order to set my laptop down where I can get a signal. So I ended up doing my dishes and cleaning around the counter just like she'd done.
7. I think the military is forcing experimentation.
I think the military is forcing my parents to perform for them and then documenting it through laptops now. They can't admit to what they've done or have forced others to do, so I think they use my mom's laptop and my dad's laptop and I don't even know if those laptops are rigged or what, but I wouldn't be suprised at all. Like, with cameras on the outside cover, or 2 way mirror type stuff so they can record and watch what my parents do. When I saw my mom on her computer and then my Dad holding up something to his, well, over it, but not while on it, I figured, it's a U.S. agency. They have allowed us to be tortured and then they want documentation of what we do. I write about some things out of desire to help prove we're not crazy, bc someone was trying to get crazy stuff started while we've been tortured at the same time. It's very bad for us.
My Dad said today, referring to something, he said, "It's not a joke." I recently wrote about "jokes" who are in government agencies, and thought maybe he was defending them. But in another sense, no, it's not a joke. It's real, and we are really being tortured and assaulted every single day and I know for a fact that my parents are force to work for govt. and who knows who they use to torture us. They are apparently wanting to conduct experiments now, that they can document from a remote location. As if they haven't done enough. I said, "Mom have you ever had this place checked for hidden cameras?"
People do so many mean things to them.
What they were doing with their laptops and in offices had no point except if someone else was watching and monitoring their every move. That would be U.S. government.
Why wouldn't it be? This is exactly what the U.S. has allowed to happen to ME. They even allowed people to medicate me and detain and confine me in spaces in order to watch me by camera and put me in a room where a U.S. govt. psychic worker could use me. They videotaped me and USED me, for ulterior reasons and motives, when I was supposedly there for "making improper 911 call".
EXCUSE ME. DO YOU THINK THAT WAS IMPROPER?? Um, pardon me, but I think we have EMERGENCY reasons to be trying to call for help. What happens when hate crime triumphs through govt. officials and law enforcement that then BLOCK us from getting help? This country's leaders have created and enforced our helplessness. So it was happening in jails, to me.
They were not only falsely arresting me, they used me when I was there.
They not only tortured me and my son, they used it as an excuse to steal my child from me.
So when I see how hate crime is controlling leaders in govt. and they use me at will for whatever they want, after obstructing my ability to have even a halfway normal life, I know they are forcing my parents to work for them. They intruded into my personal space when all I was doing was trying to protect my right to a good name and to go to college.
There is absolutely NO reason I should be where I'm at. There is nothing wrong with me and there has been nothing wrong with me aside from trauma from hate crime. It's shocking that I am even in this position, and that hate crime groups have made this happen, for over 7 years. I should be through college by now and working. It's completely unacceptable that I was blocked from travel and education. And from there, my ability to work and access to courts was blocked. There is NO excuse. My abilities and skills have not been tapped or used at all. Instead, everything I can do has been attacked. I have been FORCED into slavery ever since 2004, when the FBI and law enforcement broke my back. THEY broke MY back by forcing me out of even traveling freely, forcing me to lose lawsuits that would protect my ability to work and have good earnings. They allowed mafias to mess with my entire family and kept us separated from eachother and threatened to do worse. They have made it IMPOSSIBLE for me to get on my feet for 7 years. IMPOSSIBLE. Hate crime controlling govt. It's not me, and it's not my problem. I have always been capable of getting excellent grades and finishing college but they blocked me frmo this and blacklisted me using a defamatory article and other materials. They made it impossible for me to work, and tortured me with technology.
This is not conducive to the best genius. Not even the smartest person in the world is able to contribute or work under these kinds of conditions. It is impossible. The only reason they didn't totally demolish my parents earlier is probably bc they were still exploiting and blackmailing them.
The military and CIA can't admit to what they've done so to get evidence, they want to watch us through other forms of technology. The FBI does nothing bc they are protecting their own interests and don't want to admit how many of their employees are connected to eachother and men who attempted to date me. I would guess fully 2/3ds of the men who tried to date me are connected to FBI or work directly for FBI or govt., if not FBI.
I think it's too much of an "embarrassment" for them. And for others. Too embarressing to admit, for some, that they were pursuing me. After I've been made out to look like "this".
You know that ad about migraines, don't let them knock you out? That's a phrase I used back then, all the time. I called it being "kay-oh'd". KO'd. And I remember people jerking and flinching when I used that phrase, and stare at me intently. It was my main expression in the late 90s-early 2000s. Then I get forced out of lawsuits that just protected my own safety and ability to work and an ad comes out, with a woman wearing my shoes, under a rock, and it says don't let migraines "knock you out". A knock out is the same thing as Kay-Oh'd. Really funny. I had more than half of those migraines triggered by technology.
I was very talented and gifted but I didn't realize it. However, I didn't have the kind of "word of knowledge" and spiritual gifts my parents have, which the Military has tried to exploit.
You know all of the horrific things done to my son? Before the age of 5 mainly. They like to try to traumatize and disassociate kids early, at about, or before, age 2. They'll never use my son for some secret work bc everyone knows who he is and that the govt. and gangs have tampered with him. If they use him for anything, it's stuff like torture and mind control.
The other day I burped and blamed it on my Mom, knowing we are under surveillance. I'm pretty sure cameras are involved, but in case they weren't, I burped and then every time my Mom tried to speak up to ask me not to I said, "Mom! what are you doing?!" I kept burping and spoke up the exact same time she did, saying, "Mom, why are you doing this?!" Finally I said, to my Dad, yelling at him when he was around the corner, "Daaad! Mom is trying to blame something on me knowing people can overhear." or something like that. My Dad came out of his office and said one time he worked with this woman named Marianne, and he was covering for her office when she was on vacation and she had a planner and schedule out. Her friend, someone else, not her, had written in a reminder that next week was "national outdoor recreational sex day." And it was a friend, to embarress her and my Dad laughed about it or joked about it when she was back from vacation and she realized her friend had written this in, in what looked like her handwriting into her personal planner.
I laughed about it, but it also made me think about things that have been blamed on me, or written up in connection with my name, when it wasn't me. Or when it had no bearing on the truth about me. I imagine there are a lot "national outdoor recreational sex day" post-its in the FBI offices--maybe someone misplaced one of them and stuck it in my file.
Worse than that is possible.
They have allowed hate crime to keep me from surfacing for over 7 years.
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