I'll have to work up to THIS one. You won't believe what WA was up to. Getting very excited to expose this crap. But need to work up to it. Will probably write about it in a bit.
I have to start from the beginning. Which will be from the first time I signed up for services to their involvement in trying to refuse my son and I medical services and force us out of town (and then just taking my son away without cause).
When I signed up for services, it was at first because I was ill, coming from Oregon with chronic bronchitis and dizziness and extremely low blood pressure (which was always noted on medical records). I wasn't well, physically, and I had unexplained bruising all over my body too, which was odd. I was also having anxiety because of all the things that had happened in Oregon and the constant police harassment when I was in WA.
I signed up for General services, which is like basic welfare with a small cash income and food stamps and medical. I really didn't have other options and had to have medical with the constant migraines, which my biggest reason for signing up until, my plan was, until I felt better.
Then I became pregnant so instead of getting General welfare, I was put on TANF, which is for pregnant mothers and it's the same thing but there is a little more cash and better health coverage. The social worker I was assigned to was Tina Thornton. I actually think I was seen by someone else first, but she was so rude I asked for another worker and was happy with Tina's demeanor.
I didn't realize, that Tina was best friends with the only person in Wenatchee I got regular counseling from. She was best friends with my "psychologist", Brett MacDonald.
There were no problems at first, I didn't think. I did note that Brett was very accepting of what had happened to me in Oregon with the Catholic litigation, because I was still involved at that time. The Archdiocese case hadn't wrapped up yet and I had other things which were related, such as the Farmer's claim, oh, and I have to write about what Farmer's did to me, I believe, in conjunction with Abbey lawyers. I remember, because they harassed me, used a judge for their own means, and then closed everything out on my birthday.
While Brett was great to talk to, and I talked to her before and after the birth of my son, she was later influenced or pressured to be influenced by Wenatchee people. I found out about some of this, though, because she told me.
The only thing I wondered about, with Brett, was why she seemed to want to talk about the Catholic church stuff, but never about the FBI stuff. She believed me, but she didn't want to hear much about this part of things and I wondered why.
Brett's diagnosis of me was not anything extreme. She said she believed I only suffered from mild PTSD and that nothing else fit, logically. And it didn't, and she was the first one to "get" this. She felt any symptoms I had were directly due to harassment and nothing biological or regarding a personality disorder. Later, after I attacked her best friend, Tina Thornton, she said something to me, of the effect, that she had diagnosed me with PTSD, which she felt was resolvable and not a life-long diagnosis, before she "found out" I'd fought my own legal battles. What it sounded like, to me, was that someone tried to convince her I couldn't have PTSD or be "avoidant", if I was engaging in litigation with the "enemy" at my own will. What she didn't realize was that I hadn't intended to do it on my own, but my lawyer had backed out last minute and I did my best to keep up to defend myself. I didn't feel I had a choice. If I didn't do it, no matter how stressful it was to me, who would? I had a right to justice.
I do not believe Brett ever had an agenda. I believe she had people coiming to her later, to try to persuade her to think differently about me. I could always be wrong. At any rate, I don't even think she officially diagnosed me. I've never had a real diagnosis by any professional. She "thought", she said, that this was it, but I think she couldn't formally diagnose because she was still in school and hadn't finished exams to be fit for qualifications.
So actually, this was her opinion, but I guess it wasn't a diagnosis. I've never been diagnosed, by a professional who is licensed, with any disorder of any kind.
Brett knew one of the things I had a problem with, was opening my mail, because I tried to avoid it. I was afraid of what my reaction would be, to opening the mail, because I'd always had to open letters and motions from Mt. Angel Abbey and the Archdiocese, where they lied about me and said terrible things. And got away with it. So, in Oregon my mail was piling up, and in Washington, I especially had a difficult time opening up mail after I got John Kaempf's request that I be given an Anti-Harassment order when HE was the one harassing ME and my family. So one of the things Brett did was to ask me to bring the unopened mail to her office. Which I did once, and she noted how long past the postmark dates were. But in general, I didn't want to open my mail in her office so I didn't do this often. I knew reading these horrible and unfair things about me, upset me, so I tried to avoid it. That was my main avoidance technique.
My main issues, at the time, were occasional panic attacks (precipitated by some real or traumatic event), light depression, and avoidance issues. I didn't have nightmares or trouble sleeping or anything. I didn't hallucinate either. I had none of the more extreme symptoms. I mainly avoided things. Like mail, and then the other thing was that I avoided going to church and didn't want to be a part of religious organizations. With mail, I would just open things, and either cry or become anxious or get angry. It wasn't a problem with ALL mail, but mail from specific people or organizations that had already been harassing me.
From the exterior, Brett seemed to be "normal" but later, I thought she wasn't exactly "right". She and Tina, for one, both knew about eachother, and heard me talk about both of them to them, and never discolosed to me that they had a close friendship. This was also a problem later when they and others in "the department" lied, under oath, to a judge about me (and lost the case besides).
When I went on TANF, it was mainly because I was higher risk and my migraines were so disabling, this was what I was first applying to welfare for, to straighten out this problem. I was having migraines that interferred with work. It was a disability that at least partially interferred with my normal course of activities.
Tina, my social worker, was aware of this. I told her about it, and I told Brett. Tina was also well aware of what Brett thought, and about my difficulty opening mail from the Catholic church lawyers in particular. The other thing they were aware of was that when I was particularly distressed, I shot off tons of email to everyone. That was always a reaction to direct stress of having to deal with those who had abused me.
I didn't have violent reactions, or act physically aggressive, in any way, at any time. Anytime I was pissed, I would just send a scathing email, but I never threatened anyone with anything other than a lawsuit or "exposure", and if I did this, it was for good cause, when I knew and THEY knew, I had very good cause to sue or expose. I didn't just threaten everyone with lawsuits. Only those who had done things which were either criminal or aggreggious on a civil level (defamation, for example). So people would then claim I'd "THREATENED" them when really, all I had done was make them aware that I knew about their wrongdoing and that I knew it was grounds for a lawsuit. Big deal. I had people trying to make me out into a horrible violent tempered monster because I happened to have a verbal reaction to their misconduct and abuse.
I certaintly DID send out a LOT of email.
But I also, at the same time, was putting up with more than a lion's share of BULLSHIT.
I was constantly provoked, and the fact that this is ALL I did, and was my main reaction, is extraordinary, anyone who knows the facts, would agree. I realize this was the intent. To drive me to a reaction, and I didn't hold up very well. But if one considers how long I did hold up under the pressure, and how the worst of my reactions was to say things or write things, it is not proof of mental illness. It is proof that I was incessantly harassed.
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