Monday, November 24, 2008

TTSOML #228: Marijuana Virgin

My new host family smoked a little pot. Discreetly. I think it's safe to say, though, that the guys--the son and his friend--were die hards. They didn't even seem to want girlfriends...all they needed was MaryJ.

At first I wasn't allowed into the main apartment, probably because they didn't know if I was "cool" or not. There was marijuana stuff everywhere. Bongs, pipes, everything.

I wasn't considered "cool" until after I said one day I'd like to try some pot and I would go with them, outside, on a "walk". We were "taking a walk".

I had never sampled marijuana in my entire life until that point, and my back hurt a little bit still and I didn't have medication. I thought it might help and wanted to know if it did work at all, medicinally. I had never done any "illegal" drugs, but the state had already successfully lied enough, to enough people, and made everyone think I did. So now, I was going to try it for medicinal reasons.

These guys were shocked when they watched me. They said, "Wow, I thought you were just kidding or didn't want to admit you did it...but you're a VIRGIN. I haven't seen a VIRGIN since jr. high..." They could tell I'd never done it, I guess, because I wasn't even used to having a flame lit that close to my face and I kept backing off, because of the fire. Then, I didn't know how to inhale into my lungs and they had to coach. They said a joint would be easier for me. I didn't feel any effects whatsoever, from the couple of attempts I made, but I did cough loudly at the end, and they said that time I got a "hit".

It really couldn't have been better timing, because if I hadn't discovered marijuana prevents migraines, I would have ended up in the Whatcom country ER for migraine. But I realized, when I got my migraine, it was so mild and different, and the only thing I'd done differently, was to try pot. So I decided to continue my experiment and see if it really worked.

I've proven it does work. It is THE best and ultimate preventative to menstrual migraine and the only one which has ever worked for me, and it has almost no side effects. It's extremely mild.

So I got to know all about potheads, and then hippies, in Bellingham. I didn't drink before they took my son, except for an occasional half glass of wine combined with OTCs to try to help pain, for medicinal reasons. But I began drinking socially again, which was somewhat helpful, given the trauma the State of Washington had put me through.

I got rid of the diaper bag, because it only made me cry and made me sad. But I kept my son's shoe.

And as soon as I was somewhat stabilized in Blaine, as soon as I was across the border, I called CPS and asked to visit my son and they refused. They just kept telling me to move back to Wenatchee and wouldn't set up visitation. I knew that if I killed more time in Blaine, I would be able to establish through roommates and others, that I wasn't "mentally ill" or paranoid schitzo. You can't function socially and live with people and be schitzo. So as soon as I had established friends, and a base, I tried to make arrangements to see my son, and the state purposefully delayed and stalled, and I believe it was to try to force my son to bond with my aunt without seeing me again first.

I am also told, my son was extremely ill and depressed, and not eating or sleeping. Almost as soon as I had access to a computer, at the hostel caretakers place, I began petitioning my family for financial help for a lawyer. They wanted explanation after explanation. Nothing I said or explained was good enough and I was repeating myself. I sent over 4 or 5 LENGTHY emails a DAY, every single day, to my parents, to try to get support for a private lawyer.

The whole time, they were listening to what the state told them on the other end. But I knew the state knew they were on very shakey ground and that if a private lawyer were involved, they would be sued. And as soon as they thought I had a private lawyer, they were calling me up, their own director, and asking about voluntarily dismissing the whole case.

My guess, is that the AG, which trumped up things against me to Canada, got involved. Caballero and the AG likely told them to shut the fuck up and that they were going to railroad me. They knew who their friends were, and they weren't afraid of me. They were worried, but they figured they could still influence the outcome. The entire "game" was being staged in their hometown of friends, for one thing, and a lot of people were riding on an outcome against me, and in favor of the state.

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