Reconsideration for Attorney

After musing for hours, and being upset, I think my response was honest but not as well developed as it should have been.

I just wanted to say to this lawyer who is like my son or has been through similiar things, I understand what you were saying and that you were trying to be encouraging and show another perspective, and something of hope.

I feel a little bit bad that I didn't say more by way of encouragement for what you've chosen. Your choices and your path has worked out really well, and it takes courage and strength and I admire that.

I suppose at this point, when there is absolutely no reason for any of what's happened to me and my son, it's difficult for me to feel optimistic. If someone or a group did the right thing and just quit making this difficult and did everything they could to reunite me with my son, I could make some peace.

I don't know that peace is what the OTHERS want, ironically. It seems odd, at least, that this is taken the turns it's taken. It's very strange and that I am here, supposedly SO "severely mentally ill" that I cannot even see my son more than 4 hours a week without a guard present...

If I'm mentally ill, why has more not been done to secure a lawyer on my behalf? or a psychologist? they just threw me a list, after the person THEY chose backed out on me and changed everything.

It's obvious to everyone. To everybody. Everyone in Wenatchee knows what is going on, and maybe elsewhere too. And people know I'm not crazy. They've read the witness statements I put online and people believe me. Yet this continues! No one really WANTS a psych eval on me because they know, the STATE knows, anything that's done is going to turn out in my favor.

I don't know what your story is, or all the wrongs committed in your case and against your mother. It would be interesting to know. But it's really sad that these many things are WRONG with the system and the PEOPLE running the system.

I sometimes think, this is not even abuot the system per se. Afterall, there are a LOT of laws and rules which are good. But the problem is, Judge Hotchkiss chose not to follow them all. He's made ME follow everything to the letter of the law, but not the state. The state has laws about when it is proper to TAKE and remove a child and they didn't follow their own protocols and then worked very hard at trying to justify what they did. So is this really about policy, on this level? or is sheer accountability and the fact that the Washington State Bar and other Bar agencies are NOT the police of lawyers and shouldn't be depended upon for enforcement of the laws and rules?

I don't think, from my experience, and after talking to even Mary Del Balzo years ago, that making complaints to the Bar is ever a good idea anymore. But the problem is, there is no other place to make complaints and no other agency that can control the lawyers. The bad ones that is, or not even the "bad ones" because plenty of lawyers do a lot of GOOD. But when someone is really not doing their job and it affects lives, I think it should be taken seriously. It's not just a "hazard of the job" and lawyers do not get "danger pay". Everyone makes mistakes. And if it's a mistake because the attorneys are way overbooked with cases and can't do justice to anything, the county should then be sued. It should be the responsibility of the state or the county or whatever, to ensure that tax dollars are going towards ensuring peace and protection and civil rights.

But I had only one person, one lawyer, ever tell me what NOT to do and she really meant it and was a good lawyers. She said trying to take a complaint to the Bar was like pulling teeth and even when she'd done it once, it was made into a huge nightmare. I mean, they're ALL lawyers and they all have friends. One person complaining about another lawyer is going to have a lot of others fighting to cover things up or "free" the other attorney. And of course they know that sticking up for the accused rather than the accusor will work out nicely for them in the end, by either securing a similiar favor in the future should they come under fire, OR a better position.

But anyway, I suppose policies for better enforcement for accountability would be a good idea. And no, I don't think everyone who works for the state is "bad". And I think what you're doing is a true public service.

I guess I was a downer. I am sorry for that. What you are doing is good. I don't know that I could do what you've done and you have youth on your side. So keep up the good work and thank you for taking the time to write something positive and hopeful.

Thank you again.

Also, if you have any ideas for what to do when I can't even obtain the psychological evaluation the state has been telling me to get, I'd appreciate it. They are not setting anything up and I tried for the last 2 months to get one done through the person of their choice and then everything was switched up at the last minute and when I decided to be the one to CONCEDE and to "cooperate" and even go along with something which wasn't right, I was told no, it wasn't going to be done. So, when I have a Judge refusing to assign me with a PD, when everyone knows the last ones fouled up pretty bad, and then I have a Judge refusing to make sure the state gets a psychologist to do the evalution in a timely manner...

What would you do? If you have any ideas or know of someone, personally, who could fit me in very quickly for a psychological evaluation, let me know. I've called just about everyone on the state list that I was given and not one person will call me back. I dunno...blacklisted maybe?

Or does that sound "paranoid"? Or maybe...It is just the facts. That I cannot get legal assistance from those paid by the state, in this state. If someone wants to surprise me and show me this is NOT true, I'm waiting...


Cameo