Photo of Oliver's Beating: Punched By "A Guy"

Today, all on his own, of his own accord, Oliver began to tell me he was punched repeatedly by "a guy". He said it wasn't a kid.

His band-aid was off today, and the scraped off skin had scabbed over and there was a mark with burst blood vessels. His nose seemed to be less swollen but still slightly out of proportion, to a mother's watchful eye, and no one knows my son like I do. I guessed he'd been punched, but because of the way CPS has negated all my claims of abuse, I said nothing on Monday when he first showed up with another fresh injury.

It was while I was lying down with my son, and I told him I was taking a little bit of medicine because I'd been having a "headache" for 3 days (my migraine). So as soon as I talked about how MY head hurt, he began to point to his own head. His eyes widened as he turned to look at me, like "You too???" and said his head hurt and he pointed to his owie and said it was because "a guy" punched him repeatedly, and scratched him, at a "party". He made the hand motion of punching and showed how someone punched him in the face several times.

I got someone else to get a photo for me, and I cannot reveal my source, but I will be uploading this photo of my son's injury.

I told him to tell Holly or Pablo if anything like that happened but he just stared at me blankly and I thought, "He knows it doesn't make any difference".

I am thankful the Avilas have been interested in my son, but never in my care was he subjected to all the brusiing, nail snagging, and then full-on beatings. Not to mention they do spank him and CPS has condoned it, along with Wenatchee police. Not only that, it's strange my aunt would pass this off as something Oliver did to himself...picked off a "scab" from playing, when it's clear he was pummeled and my own, uncoached, is TELLING me and SHOWING me how he was pummeled.

I don't think they did it, but there is obviously a lack of constant and quality supervision and my son has been subjected to quite a lot.

The visitation monitor, when I asked her if she'd recorded what he said, for once, thank God, she said she DID. She wrote down what Oliver said. Oliver not only made hand motions of someone punching him, but of someone scraping or scratching him. And what he showed through hand motions fit the injury.

I may be making another trip, based on "paranoia", into Sgt. Moore's office. Actually, I think I'll just not even waste my time and instead make sure a Judge sees this. Judge Hotchkiss said he'd be interested in any photos of abuse or which could be from abuse, and I think he should reinstate my right to videotape visits.

The rest of the visit with Oliver was wonderful. It only confirmed a very special bond and aat the end, he didn't want to leave and kept turning back, looking at me and blowing kisses and waving. He said, to me to stay right there in that room and "Don't go! Don't leave!" I think my son thinks I live at the state office because that's the only place he gets to see me. He doesn't want me to disappear.

I could tell Oliver might be having some kind of attachment disorder which is new, because while he's always affectionate, I think he's been afraid of being able to love me as freely as he would like because he's afraid I'll disappear, which is what happened when the state took him from me. I think this, because of what he said at the end of the visit, and because his attitude totally changed, when he heard some good news from me, and some hope. I told him I had finally talked to a lady who might be able to help us see eachother more and he looked at me, with wide eyes and said, "okay! Yes!" nodding over and over. Then he was saying, "Tomorrow!" and I said it might take a little time still, but this lady was a lawyer who might be able to help us. He got such an excited and relieved look about him and then was even MORE affectionate the rest of the visit, kissing me repeatedly, voluntarily, and hugging me and laughing.

At the beginning of the visit, he was playing hide and seek and a little more reserved and then Rob Forest came in and he was shy. He voluntarily began to snuggle against me for a story though, and held my finger and leaned into me. Then after Rob left, he wanted to play the "night & day" pretend game. Then we were lying down and that's when I said what I did about my headache and then my son told me how he got HIS "head ache".

After that, it was right after he told me about his head, that I was lying down with him and after I saw he wasn't so enthused about telling Holly or Pablo when he was hurt, I told him he could tell "Mama" and that I would always try to protect him. I told him it was good when he told me how he got his owies because we could try to keep it from happening again and he lit up. I told him a lot of people wanted to protect him and there were angels too, that wanted to make sure he didn't get hurt, so to tell Mama and he was happy about this and agreed.

Then I told him, I had finally talked to a lady who might be able to help us see eachother more and it was like turning a switch. I told him I'd just talked to her yesterday and he was completely different. He was happy, excited, said he wanted see me "tomorrow" and it's the first time I told him I'd finally talked to someone. Usually, I've had to say I'm "trying" and working at it. But he's smart enough to know and it made a difference for him.

Then, he wanted to play "airplane" where I say, "Is it a bird? is a plane? is it a boy flying high in the sky?" and he was laughing and then he was playing a game where he just leaned over and kissed me on the lips, hard, until I fell over and did this over and over. Then I told him I could show him how to get a "spider ride" and I sang "itsy bitsy spider" while doing it and he loved it. He wanted to do it himself and imitated a spider and then made hand motions of a spider on the table. Then he talked about "spiderman" and it was sort of funny because then we went to the restroom and this little blond boy came in with a spiderman t-shirt and Oliver was pointing at it, saying "Spiderman!" and then the shirt played this song, as the lights on it were going off, Taylor's song about "you were Romeo, I was a scarlet letter, and my daddy said stay away from Juliet/you were begging me please don't go..." and Oliver was just staring at this singing shirt and, I think, thought this other little boy was really cool.

Then we went back and had some of the food. Oliver was impressed that I had brought in "fish". As soon as I told him I had brought "fish" to our visit, he looked really excited and wanted to see what was in the box. It was a fillet of smoked salmon, which, I think, may have dampened his enthusiasm. I think he was hoping for a whole fish. We had olives, which he likes, and I explained they were Sicilian, Greek, and Kalamata, and we had cream cheese with salmon on crackers and he wanted to take the fish home, even though he wouldn't eat any of it. He also had his yogurt.

So that was the visit. When I was saying goodbye in the room I said "I love you Oliver" and he reached over to give me a kiss of his own and a hug and said "I love you Mama." I had just showed him a calendar too, of when he would see me next, in 4-5 days. I showed him where today was and how many days he wouldn't see me and then on Monday, after next church service day, he would see me. So then he was telling me to wait there for him and blowing kisses. He almost looked like he was going to cry this time. He looked sad and his face changed and he wanted to stay with me. He looked like he was about to cry.

Oh, the other thing, I gave him some advice about friends and other kids and he was very excited to hear what I had to say. The monitor seemed to not like it at first and probably thought he couldn't understand, but he does, and it was clear that he DID. Just because kids can't articulate everything doesn't mean they don't understand, with great depth, what is being said, and that they're not thinking deeply.

So I told him that some kids were mean and some kids were nice and friendly and if any kid ever tried to hurt them, he didn't have to be nice about it and he could hurt them back. So the monitor is like...scoffing or gasping but I wasn't finished. I told him, "Honey, you're very friendly and you like to give hugs and share toys, and some kids ARE nice, but others are mean, and if they're MEAN, it's not YOUR fault. There is nothing wrong with you and I want you to know it's not your fault if some kids are mean. It's good to share too, but if some kid is mean to you, first try to run away and tell an adult, okay? but if there isn't an adult around, or you can't run, if someone hits you, or tries to hurt you, you can hit them back. If they try to hurt you first, you can hurt them back...it's okay, because it's self-defense and you have a right to defend yourself. It's not okay for other people to hurt you. But first try to tell an adult. And even if you don't tell Holly and Pablo, you can always tell Mama, and Mama wants to know! Okay?"

You should have seen the look on his face. His total face expressions were so clear it was beautiful. He NEEDED that pep talk from me. He brightened up to hear it wasn't HIS FAULT if other kids were mean, and that I knew he tried to be friendly with everyone but if they were mean to him, he could defend himself.

Sorry monitor and everyone else, but it's not "okay" to tell a kid to sit by passively and do nothing for themself when they're getting beat up on. Even small children, who sometimes don't have the protection of an all-seeing and all-present parent, need to hear that permission, that if no adult can or will intervene, it is okay to defend oneself against abuse.

GO OLIVER! and I know my son. He is the FIRST to hug and kiss and be kind to other children and I can tell he's been taking some beatings.

The other thing he did at the last visit which he was really proud to show me, was his skill at balancing with his feet on thin rails of a futon. They are metal and round thin poles and Oliver climbed across them and then positioned his feet over them carefully and stood up, looking at me. I let him do it even though it was slightly dangerous, because I was right there if he slipped. He stood all the way up, balancing perfectly on his feet, and didn't fall at all. Then, from his perch, he jumped from the rails onto the floor. He looked so proud and I clapped and yelled for him. I said I was very impressed with his balance. He was so happy about it and just hugged me.

Oh, funny, just read something about child development and sensitivity to clothing tags. That was Oliver, all visit. He kept trying to tear off his shirt tag and trying to turn his head to look at it. It really bothered him and was distracting.

I don't plan to write everyday.

I said I was quitting, and I am and it's not impossible. However, when I have my son talking about being beat up, and threats made, I don't know why I should be silent on that matter.

I won't be writing about all of the visits with my son here. I am documenting things elsewhere. But if abuse comes up, I'll write about it. I am concerned about who my son is/was with. The other thing I observed on Monday, was a very prominent infection around his genital area, which I noticed when he used the bathroom. I don't know how he could have gotten this.

There will be gaps. Days where I write about nothing. And then other days, where, if something horrible happens, I will write about it, if it has to do with either my SON or someone who is abusing their authority. Otherwise, the rest of my life, my son's life, and everyone else's life, is going to be kept out of my blog.

I'm still willing to take the whole thing down too. I am sure that in the next few days, where I write nothing, this will demonstrate I CHOOSE to write when I want to and that it is not compulsive and that if I choose not to write and say I won't, I won't.

This is still to establish credibility on my end, to show I am willing to take this entire blog down, should my son be returned to me without blocks.

If all of this stuff isn't happening at home, with Oliver, I am really questioning his CHURCH daycare and WHO is being allowed around my son without proper supervision. He keeps showing up with pieces of skin missing from his feet or buttocks and other parts, and pinch marks, bruising, and then now a full face beating. I want to know WHAT is going on.

UPDATE:: Copy of Email Communications Regarding Oliver's Injuries, with Avila's and CPS:

RE: What Happened To Oliver's Face‏
From: cam huegenot (cameocares@live.com)
Sent: Thu 6/25/09 12:11 PM
To: holly (hollybeanpole@aol.com)
Cc: Michelle K. (DSHS/CA) Erickson (ermi300@dshs.wa.gov)

Holly,

I feel your reply was not so much forthright as directed to CPS. I addressed you personally, and asked. I did not send the message to state workers.

However, it is not just my concern, but the concern of others who have seen the same marks, to find out what is going on.

That mark on Oliver's face is not a little "scratch". Anyone can see this and the visitation monitor and everyone else can see it. It's not a little scratch on its own either, but has burst blood vessels underneath. If Oliver did that to himself, that is one very serious example of self-harming that is occuring while he is in your care, which he never had signs of prior to removal from me.

Not only that, Oliver described how this happened to him, and he made motions which fit the mark exactly and he did not say he did it to himself.

On Monday, a couple layers of skin were OFF, and it wasn't red. By a couple days later, it was even more noticeable and the other red burst blood vessels were showing. Not only that, his nose was swollen and slightly scratched on Monday and I noticed and saw he'd been crying a lot and he told me this was true.

I recently acquired several bruises on my own legs. You know what's funny? is that not ONE of them is perfectly round and about the size of fingertips, circular, and finger-spaced apart. I have at least SIX bruises on my legs right now and each of them is irregular.

Oliver has had bruising on his legs that looks like normal playing bruises and they're irregular, but he's coming in on a regular basis still, with fingertip type bruising.

I would also like to know where he's getting scratched and rough marks on his bottom. I would like to know if you and Pablo are still spanking my son.

Do you understand something? You are NOT to physically harm my son in any way, in any form, for any reason, and you are also not to sit by as my son is self-harming himself if he is ever doing this, and you also have a responsibility to monitor any person you have watching Oliver. You haven't answered my questions about the daycare at your church, and that church of yours in right in the middle of the worst part of town, with the highest rate of child sex offenders and released criminals and gang activity. I know, because I used to live there, and I, being a GOOD PARENT, went online to find out if there were child sex offenders or criminals in the area and that's where the concentration was. The same street you have your church on, which draws primarily, people from the neighborhood.

Also, I have witnessed your own outbursts as have your own children, and knowing my own mother and what her reactions could be like, since you were both raised in a similiar situation, with the same parents, I know it is difficult to shrug off old or bad habits which you learned from your own parents as a child.

I have had the benefit of years of working with others' kids and keeping patient at all times, knowing there was never an excuse to hit or harm a child, especially not my own, at any time. Because I practiced this for decades with others' kids, when I had my own son, even if I had a technical "legal" right to spank my son or harm him through physical "discipline", I chose NOT to and I am probably the FIRST in the entire Baird line and maybe even Garrett line, to practice a completely different parenting style.

Your job, as his foster parents, is to FOSTER security and protection for a child who is not yours but who is temporarily in your guardianship and safekeeping. To love him and cherish him is the best part of it, but the other part requires constant diligence and supervision.

I am shocked with the lack of concern you have for his safety and how you allow just anyone to be around him or to babysit him. You even let total strangers to YOU, from the state, the state workers, drive him around and take him places out of your own eyesight. You let others babysit him and threw him into a daycare where I could hear him sobbing and screaming for 15 minutes while the caregiver did NOTHING to comfort him. You leave him at a church nursery while you go to church and when my son begins to self harm himself (according to you) after his wonderful "religious experiences" there, you do nothing about it.

1. You let a state worker drive my son around because it is convenient for YOU. You are thinking about your needs, not on supervision of my son at all times.

2. You let a church nursery and its workers, with children who have behavioral problems, and with the potential of drawing less than desirable nursery attendants, watch my son while you pray and lift "holy hands" to the sky. You do this because it's convenient for YOU, not because you are supervising my son properly at all times.

3. You threw my son into a daycare with kids that hit and hurt him and a caregiver who sat around and neglected him. You did this for your own convenience, not because you are caring enough about his constant supervision.

Word of wisdom...Children, especially before the age of 3, should NOT be left unattended with people you barely know, whose history you haven't learned or observed. They cannot even speak for themselves. Even children slightly older are manipulated by adults because they are young. Children need protection by good adults, from the very real potential dangers that are out there.

My son shows marks that are not normal, on his body all the time and yet you cannot even claim to know what's going on all the time because part of the time he's with others you don't know. The rest of the time, he's with you, and I and your own children are aware of your own outbursts and troubles controlling moodswings. You are not paying attention when my son says he was mauled at a party. Tell me something Holly, was there a "party" that weekend that my son attended? How about Sunday? Did Oliver go to a party or a gathering with lot of people at the house? or were they throwing a "Party" at your church nursery?

You are NOT asking serious questions, so his MOTHER is. For you to write this off as a little "scratch" is unbelievable. Absolutely unbelievable, and cause for concern in and of itself.

At this point, I considering bringing his paternal biological relatives into this. The biological father supports MY raising his child, not YOU. Did you get permission from the biological father at any time? If you didn't, you should know, I DID.

This is going to court.

I have photos and witnesses, and the state has been nothing but negligent regarding my son this entire time.

You do not have my son's best interests at heart when you ignore real abuse and trauma and yet try to stall and delay on my "services" to run the clock out for my right to have my son returned to me.

You have all screwed up.
Thanks, but there is no thanks to what the state has done. For thanks, I'll give the Avilas 70%. The rest, that 30% where my son has lost weight and was refused photos of his mother when first removed from me, for months, and for refusing to take him to an independent non-state chosen pediatrician in Whatcom County (which I was paying for entirely including your accodomodations), and for his repeated evidence of abuse and the lack of supervision and care in choosing people who watch over him...

I don't know if that 30% even negates the other good. My son is not okay but he has had to adapt and force himself to bond to the people he THINKS he's stuck with.

Cameo



--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
To: cameocares@live.com
Subject: Re: What Happened To Oliver's Face
Date: Wed, 24 Jun 2009 20:46:26 -0400
From: hollybeanpole@aol.com
CC: ERMI300@dshs.wa.gov


Cameo:

You don't have to be worrying about Oliver's safety with us, though I'm sure it's only normal for you to do so since he's not under your watch and you don't see him all the time. He is a normal 3 year old boy who enjoys playing indoors and out,and many times plays rough house style play. The scratch on his face you are referring to was nothing more than that, a scratch that he gave himself when in the car with us last Sunday.

I am not working at present and haven't been since I told you, so Oliver is under my supervision, and Pablo's. Oliver does bruise easily, apparently, and there isn't much I can do about that. I am giving him more red meat and vitamin C to try and help. He does not have fingerprint bruises as no one has been abusive to him in our household, and he has not been traumatized by us in any manner. I do take Oliver on Friday mornings, sometimes, to play with the kids at daycare when I buy groceries. He misses the kids and loves playing with them, and he gets tired with how long I am shopping for groceries, so it's a win/win situation.

Oliver has an appointment for the 30th for his yearly checkup since he turned 3 years old this past May. I'm sure CPS will provide you with a copy of the doctor's report after the appointment.

Sincerely,

Holly





-----Original Mes sage-----
From: cam huegenot
To: holly ; mom dad
Sent: Wed, Jun 24, 2009 3:13 pm
Subject: What Happened To Oliver's Face


Hi,

I'm not trying to cause trouble, believe me, but I'm very concerned about Oliver's safety at this point.

Everytime I see him he has not just bruises from playing, but fingerprint mark bruises and other weird thing like pieces of skin picked off, from his feet or bottom. Today his face was all scabbed over and bruised from what Oliver described as a beating, and it was first noticeable on Monday.

I am wondering if he's being thrown into a church daycare. Or WHO he's around, because this keeps happening.

Oliver is NOT okay and seems traumatized from it. He was definitely more subdued than usual MOndya and he'd been crying.

I would really like an explanation for what is happening to him and if you can't keep him safe, or are not questioning others' when you should be, please do what you can to support me to have him back in my care.

At this point, the visitation monitor documented this and what Oliver said, and the state will just remove him fr om family altogether.

Please work with me to help Oliver be reunited with me and please tell me WHAT is going on.

I would like to know, too, if he's getting sent to ANY kind of daycare and when he's out of your supervision and with whom.

Still interested in going to the prayer stuff.

Love,

Cameo
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I am going to have a cmoputer person upload the photos for me. I don't trust what might happen if I can't do it right and lose the photos. I have them, but I need professional help to b e sure they're loaded properly.
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If anyone wants to be sure my son isn't beat up on at the church the Avila's go to, the church is at 716 Methow. If you check on the statistics, this church is located in the worst released criminal offender area. Which doesn't mean there aren't good people, because I lived at 300-something Methow and I visited all the wonderful neighbors. But I never, ever, had my son out of my sight, and I also DID check to see where sexual pedophiles might be. Just for my own awareness, which was unnecessary, because I always had my eyes on my son, just like the neighbors all say I did. I was extremely vigilant, keeping him in the corner of my eye but allowing him to play freely and only intervening when and if necessary.

I feel more people, good people, could be involved in protecting and looking out for my son until he back in my watchful care. And I appreciate all of those who try. But if you see anything at all, and notice who my son is near, or if you have knowledge of something, by legal or illegal means even, please let me know. Please email me at: cameocares@live.com. I need help from others because some of the state workers and some of the police are not doing their job. Thank you.

ANOTHER UPDATE:
I just got a computer guy to upload the footage of Oliver's beating on the side of his face. It's a little fuzzy, but does show the layers of skin are off and then the bruising next to it. I have very good documentation of either someone beating the hell out of his face or serious self-harming.