Anger Management for Freedom of Speech

There are a lot of journalists, bloggers, artists, lawyers, and others whose children should be taken away until they complete a course in "Anger Management".

My proposal is as follows:

1. Anyone who threatens to sue another party should be required to attend 3 days of Anger Management until they withdraw their notice. Should Anger Management not be sufficient, jail time should be imposed for a minimum of 24 hours.

2. Anyone who writes anything negative or hostile about another person, in a blog, magazine, newspaper, or other publication, should be required to attend 1 month of Anger Management until they cool down, collect themselves, and find a private way to deal with their concerns. I propose they be instructed to channel their energies and writing into letters, put them in a "safe place" until the fire has died down, and then burn them, upon the embers in a symbolic ritual of peace and goodwill towards men. A tasteful Christmas song should be sung while the smoke is rising.

3. Anyone drawing or painting the image of any person in an offensive way, i.e., depicting any pastor's mother in a derogatory way, should be required to attend Anger Management for a minimum of 2 weeks until they have completed a course in Butterflies and Puppydogs and demonstrated the ability to use any color except black, which is not a "color". Artists will be rewarded for their efforts by the receipt of monies for their Butterflies and Puppydogs series, which will be a part of the Positive Reinforcement team's job to manage.

Speak softly and write a Disney flick.