weird reactions lately

I do not know what this woman's agenda is...

This young woman came in and I thought she was being friendly and then I thought, hmm, maybe not.

Additionally, I have had some of the same people who watch me all the time, recently show up more.

And then I have my lawyer not doing anything about my case and being influenced not to help.

Today, I had zero problems with my laptop and the burning stuff. I don't know what changed but I have almost been watched more closely than ever. It's not the intense international stuff anymore, but people on the fringe, still doing their best to cause problems.

So I met this young woman and she was checking out Thai cooking books. I went to the humor section to get real humor stuff. Not random, but to enjoy and choose on my own.

I found the Mother book I'd come across recently and then I also found one on disaster cakes gone wrong, which was one of few photo types of magazines, like the Mother one, which I was in the mood for. Then I also chose "Emails from an Asshole (real people being stupid)" by John Lindsay. And another one too, "5 People Who Died During Sex". Just wanted to find something funny to read.

So I had these with me and then she tells me I should check out this man who writes about how he thinks he's going to some really cool nudist colony and ends up in a nudist trailerpark.

Which was not weird still, but she kept acting a little weird about my books. She asked what I had and I showed her. I read the first two and set them aside and then I went to get more and when I came back, she was glaring at me and had a book called "Put Em Up". I thought, oh what the hell bc she was acting sort of strange.

Then I thought, does she think I'm trying to state a message or something? because I set the "Mother" book on top of the "Cakes" book? I am not kidding--I have had some of the strangest forms of dislike and really had it stirred up more than anything.

For my part, I liked her. I thought she was fine and seemed to be very smart. I just don't know why she started acting weird.

I seriously think now, now that I am just now seeing some new headline with Okay magazine, about wedding plans with Kate and Will, that I have had half of this persecution and attempt to kill me or poison me, over royalty.

I don't care if it sounds crazy or not. The more other things unfold and I notice the reactions and shifts, the more I see what might be going on or what was possibly going on in the past.

I think I was viewed as a threat.

So some went after me harder than ever and not just over my son or local issues, but because of newer fears by some. Which is even why, probably, some were trying to have me imprisoned and then falsely arrested so many times to smear me. Stealing everything I have and keeping me from getting my son back--provoking me endlessly until I have a reaction, and trying desperately to hook me up with other men or try to uncover and share dirt about me...

Starting to make sense.

To me, it wouldn't make sense to try to hook me up with different people unless I was wanted out of the way, and I have questioned why there has been this huge overhaul of me and every single thing that I own.

Poisoning too. Is no small thing.

IF it is true that at any time someone got some whiff of an idea, correct or not, that someone was interested in me who they didn't want interested in me, if it's that big of a deal, this would maybe explain why I have been chased after and harassed and followed and lied about as if I were Genghis Khan.

It might also explain why people would get paid off to steal from me and try to trash me so badly. I don't think any group would do all of that, over a medical malpractice lawsuit. It had to be something else.

I have had a feeling that some of my legal papers, which trashed me and made me look bad, too, were sent out to people in order to try to convince others that I was not a good person, or was trashy, or something.

It might explain why so many Jewish were in town from out of the area, for specific times, when I may have been the worst threat and that would explain why so many were not on my side. I would think they would be, in general, and have a little family background myself, but it's been very strange and I haven't understood why.

However, why problems with Catholics? just old stuff maybe? or something new? Not all of them but one party I guess stirred up problems and wanted to pass it off for one thing when it was something else.

That might explain why all of the internationals and others pretending to be nice but being involved to draw me away from things that were good for me.

It might be why people I thought I could trust, tried to set me up to go to federal jail. Because I was a threat in that regard? or because I was interested in Diana?

The more people trashed me, the less of a threat I was. Isn't that true? But still, all of this effort to keep me down in such a way that I have never heard of before, ever.

I may not have met William in person. Maybe not, or maybe I did and didn't realize it. But I know for a fact that I saw Harry. It was in Washington D.C. and he popped his head around a corner. I never met him and wouldn't even say this much until now. I kept it to myself for a good reason. And I also know, for a fact, that someone I knew, knew them and the family. I later understood why I was being asked all these questions which were very specific. I had no clue why I was being asked about any of it. Now I do.

Someone just covered up the magazine cover now, about the wedding plans. Don't want me to talk I guess. Go figure.

I guess what was revealing to me, is simply having all these things get stirred up again, and wondering WHY and what in the world is going on, and then I see this cover and it clicks.

And I cannot believe it.

But this makes a lot more sense now. Why even Judge Shea would not honor my request, to federal court, to give me a lawyer and put out an injunction until I had a lawyer, and send this off to me on August 10th. I asked for a normal lawyer. I was told to ammend my claim. Why am I being asked to state a claim when it is clear that if I'm stating I am pro se and don't wish to be, and need a public defender, this is a claim right there, in and of itself?

My son hasn't seen his mother for 2 weeks.

I used to think a few Jewish people were just mad at me for having anything to do with someone they knew who had a girlfriend who was Jewish. I thought that this was it. But now I am seriously wondering.

I don't even know that Kate is Jewish though. I mean, I'm not sure of it by any means, but who cares anyway right? or what is going on?

Maybe one group thought it was about one person they didn't want me to be with and others thought it was about someone else. ? or there really is some great big dual with groups?

I have had some issues in the past, yes, but nothing that I can think of, so offfensive to anyone, that they would actually want to drag me through the mud this badly and keep my son from me AND try to make me look like a criminal too! and keep me from even having work or a house???

However, I do recall that for some reason I could get work in some other areas, and had an English guy say to steer clear of this region and someone else said this State, but maybe it wasn't just about state stuff at some point.

Unless someone really mistook me for being a Russian spy or a mistaken identity, I cannot think of any good reason to go after me like this. I just can't.

So what is going on?

Make the local people hate me so much I never get ahead, to appease some others who have a greater agenda?

And yet, with all of this, I still, for some odd reason, have a general peace, at least in this moment. I shouldn't though.

My son doesn't see me. There is no peace in that at all. Today I felt a bad vibe several times that I couldn't do anything about, because I am blocked by sick persons in this justice system, from being able to look out for, and check on my son.

As for other things, I somehow have peace that maybe something will work itself out. I don't have to have anyone, just because....other than my child.