Handwriting & My Thoughts Today & Yesterday

I got to talk to a woman yesterday who sat down and she said Kate and William had gotten married. I said, oh, I didn't know if they had. And I guess she wanted my reaction or really believed this. I thought it's possible they eloped. But then we started talking about Diana and what happened to her. She believes she was murdered. So I said, "Really? well tell me what you think. Do you feel it would have been a rogue cell within some intel or do you think it was much larger?" and she said, "I think it was much larger than that" and she teared up and then shortly after, walked away. I won't say who and she, for some reason, had a military tag and had been in the military so I am not sure if she wanted to know what my reaction would be if I thought they'd married, or if she was really just sharing. I felt, my impression was, that she was being honest in what she shared about this--that she felt it was much larger.

I said, "I never thought so before, but now after seeing and knowing what has been possible, to happen to me and my son, now I believe this is possible, that it was a larger group or a lot of people involved."

I think I met her not last night but the night before, on Monday night. Yes, it was Monday night and then she left right after we said basically this much and that was it. I remember I went home that night though, and thought about Diana and felt this weird doubt, like couldn't she have escaped somehow? Maybe leading a normal life somewhere else under cover? I kept thinking, either it was a lot of people involved with helping her to get away or it was a lot of people premeditating her demise.

I also thought, after what I went through with being harassed while traveling, that if some wanted to be so atrocious to her, with media and others, that it could have been very bad and as deliberate as it was with me.

I won't say who, but I am thinking, for some really weird reason, that some latinos really believe this too, about Diana. I don't know why and I haven't figured that out, but maybe some people who were latin american were close to her at some point and know what is possible.

I hadn't thought about Diana and things like that for a long time, until this woman sat down with me. And then I started thinking again.

The next day, I saw the handwriting samples. The combination of being tortured again all the time, non-stop, and then knowing what has happened to my son, and then thinking about Diana when I saw the sample, actually brought me to tears. I didn't cry or let them fall, but I had to try very hard not to.

And the reason is because my heart went out to him in a very pure way, without any selfish motive, and I tried to say, in that moment, to send the psychic message that my motives are not wrong, with my interest. And the only time I have ever teared up, while thinking about William, has nothing to do with Kate but to do with his mother.

I couldn't tell and still can't, if I'm made fun of or not, and what the deal is, but I know my own heart and so does God and that is beyond the understanding of any mind reader or psychic and THEIR own motives.

When I saw his writing, I felt I saw a sensitivity and also an insecurity. And recently I had thought about how sensitivity can manifest with kindness or also with the very opposite, which is the result of a need to be self protective.

In the last week, for some reason, it kept crossing my mind, not Spencer, or Earl Spencer, but what these two, esp. William, went through even from the start. And I thought about it because I know what has happened to my own son and how he has been affected for the rest of his life.

I thought about how he had been born with a sensitivity from birth and an intuition and how he was bonded to his mother but then forced to attach to a nanny, Barbara Barnes. I haven't read much about their lives, just their moms and this is mentioned. So he first was attaching to his mother, then it was probably his nanny who was fired at some point. He runs to his father as a little toddler, out of everyone, but then mainly sees guards or protective officers his whole life. He was supposedly a terror as a boy, which was probably an early sign of acting out. He had no problem killing animals which is odd, considering Harry was more reserved in this regard and yet William is the one who is more sensitive supposedly. I thought, it might be that this sensitivity also manifests in the reverse sense, of taking out emotions through hunting or not feeling pain in harming things. At least when he was younger. It could even be a way of feeling control, as a child who is not always allowed to be in charge of what he wants to do. He didn't want to go to school and was prodded along. Harry was more natural to being with people so I don't think it affected him as much. I felt that probably in the circle he was in, he was being raised with several incidents where it was deliberately to detach him. And then I think it is possible that both Harry and William were beginning to look like promising humanists, possibly, with their mother helping to direct them.

The other phrase that kept coming to mind was something someone quoted Diana as saying (true or not): "William will be king and I will be his Merlin."

I think not everyone wants a promising humanist in the position of power which I never really thought of as "power" but now have understood more. The media coverage alone, is power. What someone might choose to volunteer for or do, with this coverage, could adversely affect certain groups. Standing up for a good cause will not always please all sides.

When Diana became involved with both middle easterners and weapons of mass destruction, it was a double-whammy. Add to this, some threats she was making about exposing people, even in her own family and own country (and other countries). She was turning into an activist, not just the wife of a royal, and the allegiance her sons had with her and to her, would not be difficult to anticipate. In her own way, she was even a kind of spy.

(The lady from the Red Cross decided to come over to where I was and have her lunch, here locally. I look over and then she is smirking as she walks out. She came in with her Red Cross badge on, prominently displayed and sat right across from me and then smirked as she was leaving...This is seriously the weirdness that I have to put up with)

If one is covertly collecting information against ones own government, it is tantamount to espionage.

But would the people allow Diana their Queen of Hearts, to be tried in a court of law for espionage? I highly doubt it. I also highly doubt that any other country would be able to go after Diana for anything, legally. She would have public support, in general.

I also never really believed being connected to Muslims had anything to do with it, but I have changed my mind. Charles himself is a fan of Muslims and Islamic art so there is no discrimination, I don't think, that holds well. Valerie is connected to Russia. I am still confused about whether Valerie and Diana were really friends or not but the point is, different royals sort of enjoyed friendships with people of different countries, aside from their own.

When Diana was already concerned about William for his sensitivity and desire to protect her, with the crash or wreck, I believe the worst occured.

For some reason, I still can't believe it lately. I have lately thought maybe the island burial is to prevent anyone from discovering she got away but then I think all those ogther people would have had to go to trial and testify she had died and so many would have seen her besides. I look at the faces of her sons at the funeral though, and they are not truly sad looking, which has puzzled me and then I think well maybe they are really that capable of distancing their feelings and emotions.

When I saw a photo of William in Toronto, Canada recently, I saw undisguisable suffering of some kind. And Harry looking sort of helpless like he didn't know what to do about it but he was very aware of his brother. The Canadian man looking triumphant about something, like "THIS IS THE WAY IT IS"

So when I looked at the handwriting, I didn't expect one thing or the other. But when I saw it, I had to close the link and not think about it. Because it made me think about his mother. Then I saw the r and wondered what the hell was going on. Like a joke? or meant to be an insight?

I need to see it close up.

Oh, now that I am remembering, I did sense very bad energy last night. I had wondered if my son was being tortured as I have been. I cried for the first time in a long time and asked God to help me and convince someone to come forward. I remember because I was lying on the floor in the bathroom, wanting privacy and listening to music and the song when I started to cry was from Arriana by Marchello, something about Rosa. They didn't introduce the song first. I heard the title after the aria was sung. She kept singing, "pieta, pieta" and I was just crying. I cried throughout the entire aria and then stopped. I was, for once, released to cry and all my emotions there. And it was about my son and thinking about him and how he has been blocked from even seeing his own mother and how his wishes have been denied. There was going to be a song by Prussians about fly away peacock, to help save the poor, and a lot of peacock variations but I pretty much turned it off after the aria. There was something else but it was like Wagner, so dramatic and intense and minor chords and stormy and I couldn't keep listening to it. One song, right before the Aria, was like water ebbing in and out and I remember this. The song was plain and then this second section came in and I saw the water.

Anyway, I digress.

So I will look at his writing and then write this. I might look up this Arriana song first. It was from NPR I think and the woman singing had the most beautiful
voice. I have to know who it was. But the only part I understood was pieta.

I think I found the actual title: Rosa del ciel (Rose of the heavens). They only mentioned it at the end as "Rosa". Hmm, maybe I clicked on the wrong thing. Rose of the heavens goes with L'Orfeo. something about Marchello too. I think they said the name of the opera was Arriana. I'm finding out now. Well, I'll find out some other day. I think it would take work to find. It was probably from NPR which would be the main classical station. They were doing one hour with some selections, and I came in on a flute symphony piece by Franz and then there was another flute piece (I think) and then I think it was this Rosa aria. At any rate, I woke up this morning and felt bad or sad energy and that I was not going to get my son back unless someone intervenes in a major way. My lawyer is not helping and only focuses on appeal, and I have the right to challenge this entire thing on basis of corruption and lack of jurisdiction.

On his note...I haven't looked it up again yet. But I felt something hidden or forced to be, and also, very "in the lines" but slightly insecure in some regard. Maybe from being pressured, maybe from being bullied. The script was very small, much smaller than Charles' which usually indicates introversion by nature. The letters were so tightly squeezed together with some words that I felt he is not very open with who he really is and is extremely guarded. Nothing stood out as "alarming"--as in deviance. I need to see the note again.

Something looked very honest and friendly or transparent on one hand and then on the other hand, very hedged in.

I wasn't sure if it was really his writing. I imagine it is, esp. for such close friends but it crossed my mind how sometimes people make or write a note for someone else. But I assumed, on his own stationary, his own hand. I would say if someone else wrote it, I would seriously question the motive of writing the r that way. If it was William, I am confused and that's all. I think maybe his Mom made her r's that way though. I just remember something in particular, from D.C., which I won't mention right now.
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someone just shut my computer down. It is plugged into the wall and the battery is good and someone shut it down. This other man just walked by, a "Lee", who is bad news. He is Italian and bad Italian. He's not one of the good ones. He works at Skillsource here in town.

At any rate, my computer was shut down. And I kept feeling the sensation to my head, that I had happen at Safeway, when I then had the laser beam dot appear on my laptop. So I asked the guy who works here what is above this cafe and he said it was storage. He said the storage area is owned by the cafe owner.

Others are getting off on this woman who is a little overweight, who came in while I was writing this and flashed her book title at me: "A Christian Funeral". She has been sitting here licking her fingers and sucking on them non-stop since she showed up and people have made a big deal about her, with nods and smirks and laughing. Not at her, but with her. I think the finger licking is supposed to be a big deal and the point of comedy because she is doing it every other 5 seconds. Oh, now she has finished her...no she hasn't. She just touched it and didn't even break off a piece and then made a point to lick or suck on her own fingers again.

If I look around, the only other people here, with proximity to where I am, is a black man who doesn't like me who is often here. Then there are 2 people behind me. I believe I once had some weird things happen the last time this man was here so he is not ruled out but there may be the others who are right behind me too.

Because my laptop was shut down, intentionally, when it's already plugged in, I know that someone is deliberately trying to cause harm through technology.

I went to the page for the British Monarchy to look up the note that William wrote and as soon as I went to this site, my computer quit, or basically said "Going on standby"

Now Cafe Mela decided to put on the song "Rhianna" by Fleetwood Mac about "will you ever win". They have had no music all morning until now. I guess someone clever had to think of a very smart song to put on. Arriana-Rhianna. WOW.

The woman I called an "assassin" the other day is from Central America. That's what she just told me. I went to the counter and she said, "You called me an assassin the other day" and I said, "Yeah I did. You're not originally from Wenatchee right?" She said she has been here since she was 10 years old. I don't buy what she told me. I knew she wasn't from here but I don't trust what she just told me necessarily. I guessed she was from Seattle and she said no, she'd been here from Central America since she was 10.

I got up from where I was sitting and someone still did something to target me so it has to be that the fucking metal in my neck is either a tip off to other kinds of technology or someone here is doing something. The thing is, people who are local seem to know when it's happening so if it's so top secret or coming from another source, why would they know. It quit and then then the black guy walked back in but there are two men behind me who are getting a kick out of things. Some Asian guy is running around outside with a long sleeve shirt on and the number 9 on it. The woman who sat here for almost 1 full hour just left, and for bringing in a book, she only turned to one page and was on one page the whole time. So I think the point was to flash a title about a christian funeral in front of me.

There is no doubt that it's technology though, because someone keeps screwing with my laptop at the same time, and turned it off right as I went to the royal images section to look up handwriting.

Now I went to the site and I can't find the images from the Remembrance Day. I see some of Harry, which I'm not remembering seeing before, so I guess they were in the backlog. I think they were there. But where are the ones with Charles and William? Maybe in a different section? Why would they delete them?

This is weird.

I tried to find them and then my page got redirected to the missing video clip of the Quatar banquet. It's been replaced with a photo of the Queen in a straw hat. I felt like the Quatar banquet was evidence.

I'm sorry, but that clip, seeing that after what I went through, was proof to me that someone in their ranks was deliberately out to cause me distress and then wanted to rub it in my face and make an ass of the Quatar man too. If it wasn't, then why did it come down? It showed ME, at least, that someone wanted to freak the hell out of me or let me know my every movement was watched. Which would be great if I felt it was friendly and lately I am really wondering. Why would anyone want to be a part of what terrorizing I went through? Unless it's just to say, "We sympathize with you?" and I don't think anymore, that this is it, and I go to the photo (not the gallery but just the first photo) of Kate and William and they are photographed for their engagement underneath a set of FEET?

I guess I was wrong. I said it's not all about me.

But it is.

Which means I am tortured for having power enough to draw this kind of interest in me to begin with. Which makes all of it plausible and most likely, that I and my son and family have been tortured and terrorized and it's not a joke.

Probably, if it were a friendly hello notice, the whole golden ass on the table by the Quatar, it would be accompanied with a present of a lawyer, courtesy The Queen. Now I am thinking it looks more like the Queen or someone, is worried about their own Queen's Counsel, OR someone is seriously manipulating all of them and making them look like rich and self-interested bullies, and how is that good for the monarchy? With that kind of attitude, and with the Queen about to pass away, the monarchy will probably be abolished because the people won't put up with it. I have not thought anything was against me really, except for a few people who were showing up to harrass and monitor me. Then, I thought, probably they are sympathetic but can't say too much. Then it was "Are they sympathetic or are they making fun of me or is someone actually setting them up and putting them up to it and they don't even realize this?" Then, after I was harassed and followed all over in a grand Jewish-planned escapade, there is the horse ass on the table, which makes me think, in combination with being harmed in Russian Baptist church while the sermon was about "we will make sure no one takes your crown from you (Kate)" and someone filming it and I felt it was going to the royals. Last service was about the plight in Israel at the end. Why are they pandering to Israel unless someone from Israel is influencing what they do?

I was fucking TORTURED in Russian Baptist church and I guess the point was to score points with the monarchy?! or people around them? WHAT THE FUCK.

No one even cared about the british monarchy over here until I started to bring it up. Then all of a sudden, like right now, we've got this family deliberately staring at me as they walk by the window, dressed in only pink and blue. I think they are one of the few Muslim families in town because I remember seeing her before. This is so nuts. Hm. Well, I know one thing for certain, in an uncertain world full of deception--you do not have Osama bin Ladin's approval. And THAT is about as much as I know anymore. Who really stands for what they say they stand for anymore? I am just saying, "Hell. At least I know, I think, what Osama bin Ladin stands for even if I don't agree."

I am not kidding. No one even cared, and now they do, and now they do...why? because the whole point is to be obnoxious and believe they are tormenting ME? If so, that is really messed up. No one ever gave a rip about the british monarchy and now, since I've brought it up, they made a big deal about it from Seattle to Wenatchee and even wear things and yet it's just weird.

I do not have a good feeling about any of it.

I feel badly for the british monarchy too, and actually, more than they feel about me and my son I think. Because they have thought it funny to encourage or enable others to harass me and I think, if this is true, given ones position, it isn't becoming and anyone from a christian or upper class background especially, should know this.


I sat through that service and felt, on that day, that something from that service was going to the monarchy. I didn't know if it was cameras in the church that were hidden, or the video filming that was being done, or what, but I thought so and then this guy at the long table is knocking the chair over on the right side and someone has put golden horse asses all over the banquet table. Which I thought was in sympathy for me and what I had just been through. I had dinner at a Chinese restaurant in Spokane which features a HUGE version of the horse ass. And then the next day, the Queen's banquet was set up that way.

Now this woman just came in with a big pregnant belly and her t-shirt says, "I'M PREGNANT" and she has this hot pink and black trim so I grinned and her and said, "Is your name Kate?" and she said, "No, it's Kim. CLOSE!" and I cracked up and said, "I had to ask. It was the most natural question."

Okay, so with all the harassment, and then more with this Kate stuff, I feel it is in my best interest to really know her family's background and religion because I do think it would point out where the harassment is coming from and which groups hate me because they imagine I had been a threat to their agendas.

That wouldn't explain everything, but it would definitely explain a lot. It would help point out, for example, if she is coming from a Jewish background, why I had every Jewish-American and an Anteater too, going after me and trying to stir things up with Catholics or hispanics to be a smokescreen for their own agenda. There are also some who just already had their own issues with me and would blame it on something new, but some of this can be traced to other things and I know there is no way I would have this many problems if it was not connected in some way.

I have a huge list of people I can just pick off, and go over, who have been in MY WAY of anything normal, like even just having my son and a normal job because instead they had to protect themselves and rip me to shreds and provoke me to such such distress that I unraveled if I didn't kill myself.

I think it's sad because I cannot imagine that going along with this kind of thing is what Diana wanted for her sons. She went along with it to a certain extent and then her moral resolve kicked in. She almost died from it and held on and then, here she is, secretly taping Valerie and doing her own "spy investigations" on her own family, including investigating and being willing to report a rape of a servant and wanting abuses to end, and then while she's taping Val's servants, and threatening to expose Charles and the others (I guess personal things), she is a "spy" of sorts, compiling a dossier that works against the U.S. military and her own countries lead, and she did it to help the poor and vulnerable, not the status quo. Some of this could have even been to "have something" against others in order to simply protect her access to her own sons, because she probably thought she was losing them.

Then, given her propensity to help the adverse, she went from her Jewish divorce lawyer, and confidants, to Muslims and IF she was ever thinking of marrying, and she already demonstrated a willingness to marry a Muslim through her interest in the Pakistani doctor...her sentiments could be shifted to the Muslims. And if she had more children, her own sons would also be interested in Muslim good or causes in a new way. Who knows what The Merlin had imagined.

The Merlin could have upset the entire social order.

Congratulations on the engagement by the way, becasue I have to throw that in here somewhere. The World can look forward to Mini-me's of Gary. Cheers. Even a poor person or a peasant's father would be better for Grandparents than "THE WORLD BELONGS TO GARY".

It is not the joining of two countries in this exchange of hands for marriage. It is not an alliance with Spain and Greece, or Denmark and England. It is not Russia or Pakistan with Scotland and England. Oh no. It is England and Party Pieces. Or England and Gary's World. Hoorah. Visa-vis England and NY Jewish Community and The Cocaine Industry Internationale.

If I cared I wouldn't be mean, but you are talking to another kind of "animal". One that has been repeately, literally, and undeniably tortured and no one has done one FUCKING thing about it.

So if I feel part of my and my son's suffering is due to the jealousy and misconstruction of my life, or that this has been used, I feel I'm justified to be slightly cynical, in my own right, after everything MY son and I suffer.

I do not see Kate, or her family, as examples of independence (maybe her parents for starting the biz but not Kate for refusing to do anything else), or of charity and goodness to the poor and disadvantaged (in a natural sense--not out of appearances), or of moral rightness (tolerance of illegal activity in the home in the middle of even involvement with the royal family, knowing the dangers). Then Carol disowns her own brother, just to distance herself for political reasons. Nice. Instead of being a sudden 'waste of space' he could have been surrounded with encouragement and love to get into rehab. Instead, he's a waste of space.

Social climbing is the word.

Which is why I have thought it would even be better for him to go with another royal or aristocracy from some other country. That's not serving MY own interests. That is thinking about what kind of family is so interested in elevation. There are even non-royal or non-aristocratic families that are less interested in social climbing. Being an entrepreneur is admirable. Social climbing is not. That's my opinion. I think Kate did one thing right--she kept her mouth shut. It is impossible to say though, that she is separate from her family when she has never even lived in her own apartment and has lived her entire life, with Mom and Dad. She is 28 years old and any other normal person in England would have wanted to have their own place. She not only lives with Mom and Dad, she works with Mom and Dad.

Which, to most people who have even a little bit of money, is strange.

Who am I to speak, given my situation?

It is a far cry to be tortured and trapped and have everything stolen from you (in my case or case of others) than it is to have every natural advantage in the world and do nothing unique for yourself.

(Other than to secure a boyfriend your brother brags about.)

Even then, I never thought they were soul mates, intuitively, but I think what was settled on was a combination of trust, and security or insecurity.

I guess the reason why Kate lived with her parents all this time, is because she is a virgin.

If they took down the note from William, I won't analyze more of it.

What felt good, in all of this, was, for once, seeing this woman who is always so mean and mocking me who I know is Jewish, walk past me with one mocking expression and haughty look and then, after I had posted more, walk by looking just shocked. At least dropping the harassing nature for once.

I once posted my thoughts about kate with william on the royal forum, and I was delicate and anonymous but all of a sudden my computer was down, crashed, and then the whole fricking site was down and "under construction" and every single thing was just crazy. Same with the psychic hotline site. That was around chrismas of last year, when someone really decided to basically torture the living hell out of me. I guess it was a little before then. First people were trying not to upset me so they were doing all of this pretend-sucking up right before last winter. No one wanted me to upset their own plans so I was even led to believe I might get my son back. In the meantime, people just stacked things how they wanted and wasted my time and then started torturing me again and stealing from me so I sounded like a lunatic and couldn't get anything done either.

I just want someone, anyone to come forward and give me ONE piece of information for getting my son back. That's what I have cared about all along. What has happened is unbelievable.

Anyway, I was thinking as I was walking, if Kate were not literally living with and working with her family, 24/7, I might think she has some small independence. However, that cocaine thing with the uncle, I was thinking, if you are NOT involved, the natural thing is to be mortified and then embrace and encourage counseling and feel sorry for the family member. They wouldn't distance--they would get closer. If they KNEW about it already or were involved, they would then react by distancing and not wanting to consider that person a part of the family. I highly doubt they didn't know when they are having Kate and William stay for weeks at a time with him. Which means Kate knew. Which means, possibly, that William knew or at least found out. That family reacted to cocaine bust news the way people who are involved react, not the way innocent people react. One wonders what kind of party favors come with the Party business. It might go into the background for awhile, with time, but no one will forget it. It will always be a question. It might be slightly different to imagine someone with a bong in one hand and a ledger in the other, but cocaine is still something that ships and subs and planes are pulled over for and people go to jail over for a long time.

If it is true that the car Diana was in had a very small bag of cocaine in it, or this was found, I wouldn't think someone would want to get messed up in that again. Regardless of who it's from or who's involved. They're all really nice when they're clubbing with you and you're going along according to their plan, and then when they don't like you anymore, they're blackmailing you or dragging you to the ditch.

Maybe it's one thing to try it once or twice. But to be involved, or have people in your family involved, is really different, I think. It's dangerous. Especially if or after one knows and then still goes with it.

For some reason, tablets are coming to mind, more than loose powder. So I'm looking this up now. Probably, cocaine leaves in natural form are good for a person now and then, maybe, and for hard labor at times or, according to wiki there are some medicinal benefits just like alcohol and marijuana, but it's so illegal it's not worth it to be really involved.






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