Someone Screwing With Things...My Blog

I just discovered someone screwed with my blog posts to upset something--I think, a bet.

I found out a post I made, had a comment which didn't go through last night but was there today. And I didn't know it was even there or I wouldn't have done certain things today.

Like go to lunch maybe.

I feel that someone interfering with my post and then adding it to my blog when I didn't even know it was there was deceitful.

I had tried to answer someone's question about their thinking I was against jews (which I tried to explain). It didn't post last night. I checked and it was disconnected and didn't post at all. It didn't post the whole thing either, because I looked at it this morning and it ends with "which is why I won't take food or drink from anyone" and that's not how I left it.

But the fact that this comment was there, like that, stating I wouldn't take food or drink from anyone, I know intuitively, messed with something. Because someone would make a guess that I wouldn't go to lunch or eat out today at least and then some betted against it.

Or I look like I say one thing and do another.

I had added to the comment, clarifying what I would accept or when, but it never posted so I made another comment stating it hadn't posted and I would explain tomorrow.

I know something was up because when I went to lunch, I figured, at a restaurant, it's no big deal of course, and different, but I had no idea this other thing had posted, in the way it posted.

I sometimes say one thing, and do the other, if it is for an important reason, but in general, I try not to be contrary if I'm writing on a serious topic, as I was. I wouldn't have mixed contrariness in my explanation about jewish things.

Doesn't saying one thing and doing another make one a hypocrite? at least in some cases? and that was not what I was trying to portray or explain at all.

At any rate, I had a nice lunch and was happy to make the acquaintance of someone else who knows the town. But I wouldn't have left my posts like that. So to explain, it wasn't me.

I don't think it's necessary to explain further if I already have someone going to lengths to screw with my comments or order of comments.

Lately, even when a big deal is made out of something, I am trying to base it back to the reality of what is happening between me and God and not worry about what someone else thinks.

For a small example, I went to the service today and prayed along with everything, out loud, except for the part where it is the prayer for forgiveness for sins. I had already closed the book and instead of imitating out loud, and pretending like I didn't need the book to follow along, I just prayed quietly while everyone else recited it. I said it in my heart, and figured that's good. But then it was sort of funny because I went along with the prayer at the end, which everyone knew and I sort of followed along, out loud, thanking God for forgiveness of sins (when I hadn't even said the prayer for forgiveness out loud). haha, so it was sort of funny because this one woman looked at me with a quirked eyebrow and then greeted me with a courtsy (curtsy?). I thought, "Oh no, like I think I'm special because I don't have to say the sinner's prayer but I can say the "I'm forgiven!" prayer out loud".

I sometimes think about these things but who cares. Most of it, doesn't matter and people will figure you don't know.

If you feel okay with yourself, I guess, and God, you're okay.

But yes, I believe someone intentionally altered my email to influence what I did today and no, I would not have accepted lunch if I'd just posted that without clarifying. For a certain reason.

I think there was a potential "order of things" that someone was attempting to manipulate perhaps. Maybe someone didn't want some things to happen.

I had planned, after church, to just go to the cafe and then possibly after email and internet research and applications, go home for the night.

Very interesting. The song "Changing Your Heart (you know who you are)" came on. Sort of ironic, isn't it? I do love this song. Oh, the song is coming from a personal player. This one man who was sitting here when I came in and then when I left was making a big deal about it. So some group expected this.

I don't know what happened at the end of the day, but I know some group was hoping to interfere with how something turned out.

That's all I can say.

What I know, is I don't care, as long as my family is safe and no one is harmed. Others either. And if I have work, that is what I am interested in.

What is really sad is that there was some joke on my going out to eat and the hope was that I would have "pulled pork" and "pie" and I picked up on the pie bit and didn't have any. I said I was swearing off of sweets. I didn't want to say I had been fasting, but I had enough discernment to know not to order or take any bite of pie. I just said I have put off sweets for now, and "fun". He asked if I could have a glass of wine and I said, "I don't consider that to be fun. I consider that to be part of a healthy diet now and then" (something to that effect at least, not that I've had a glass or would).

As incredible as it seems and as out of the loop as I am, I am picking up on very small bits and pieces. I'm not walking around trying to figure everything out or read anyone's mind. I'm just trying to be myself and just have some simple things like work. That's it and this is not too much to ask for.

Then these other women came in when I went back to the cafe and went on about "we enjoyed watching your stuff" but it was in a different vein of thought. Sorry, and it could be taken any way, but some of the digs here have been...hmmm, actually...somewhat discreet. It's one of those things that when repeated sounds nuts or like one might have misunderstood, but on another level, given tone and expression, the intent of the saying is given away.

Like what you say in a courtroom and then the tone and expression that gets completely lost on the transcript.