Illegal Medication in Nashville & antique white "roses"

I am positive now that someone put medication in some food I took.

I fasted the rest of the day and all the effects of medication were present. It interfered with my first days of looking around for work, of course.

I think it may take awhile for my body to flush out all the shit I've been given. The first day I didn't take food prepared by someone else, my sense of smell even came back. One or two things instantly returned and the rest probably screwed with my system and will take awhile to get back. This sets me back, of course, as it always has, when it's been done.

And then I had my favorite and only scarf stolen. My sweater the next day and I travel light--I only took with me 3 shirts (which I layered), 1 sweater, 1 pr. of shoes, and one pr. of jeans and a scarf.

What's worse was that some tried to make a joke out of it, as if this is not crime and is funny.

There was a service but it felt like a mockery service in some ways. They had some guy there doing impressions of my Dad, and the speaker was saying good things, but used every cliched phrase from the Bible that comes to mind and then the music was almost intentionally simplistic, as if he could do better but the point was to not do better. I did not feel the holy spirit with that pastor. I felt the whole direction and glory and purpose to god was cheapened by making it into a stage for theatrics. He did say some good things, but he was pulling a plug for someone too. I felt he was trying to make fun of my family and cheapening or making light of our form of worship too. He got it wrong, but I felt that's what he was doing. It made me sick that anyone would use a podium for an important position, for something else.

Also, the kids were not there and I missed the positive energy from children. That was one of the first things I noticed. There was also a woman who has had some pretty bad things happen to her but I'm not sure if maybe she had decent energy. I was trying to figure out where the power was, and I think a lot of it was from the kids.

One thing that I noticed, which made me wonder if we were going back to 1950s subliminally flashed messages, was that I saw roses at the end of the service. I'm not going to say it was an "image" or a "vision" or anything, because I saw them right after looking at the projection screen and then closing my eyes to just pray. I opened my eyes again because I figured I had seen them on the screen but they weren't there. They were antique white, almost cream, but not that much yellow to it, large, fully opened roses. I saw the direction or position they were in but I was confused about whether they were real roses, fabric roses, or large cake roses. They were 3 dimensional, so they were not flat, as if in a rug. I asked someone what time it was when I decided to write it down and it was "10 minutes after 8 p.m." so it must have been at about 8 p.m. that I saw this. I thought it was maybe something like in the 50s where little messages to "eat popcorn" or "buy soda!" or other subliminal photos are so quickly flashed, it doesn't register as real except in ones subconscious. I don't know. I could draw them. They were gorgeous--rich and exquisite. I saw them without focusing or trying to see anything so this is why I wondered if there was something on the screen that I somehow picked up on. There were at least 5 or 6 and in a row that I saw from a vertical slant. Not straight up and down but at an angle and in a row. Just one after the other, not a cluster. If I didn't see them bc of a subliminal msg on the screen, I saw them through the eyes of someone else.

It was one of the Baptist churches but I won't say more than that. It really doesn't matter because every denomination has different people in it and different quirks.

When I went to the Episcopal church, last Sunday, the atmosphere was pretty normal for the religious education section. It was sort of boring, but good application to life--about the gift of administration. The second service was very good, sermon wise, and form, but a few odd things or people, again, with theatrics. I don't feel church is the place for that.

The other thing which I guess I will just say is William. Very weird. It's like a cosmic joke. I might elaborate. I guess all I will say is that I don't know what the deer blood smear (he received after his first kill) is all about, but maybe I don't want to know. I am curious as to whether the smear was vertical or horizontal I guess and that's it.

The only wrong thing I did was during part of prayer or reading, I was so absorbed in the reading that I didn't know everyone else had turned to face the center of the church. I was oblivious and stood face forward. I didn't take communion, but that's not wrong, it's personal choice to sit back. It would have been a common cup though.

I also thought they were going to recite the Apostles Creed but instead it was the Nicene Creed. I got by okay, from memory. Didn't remember every single word for word but followed well enough.

Also, I had received a flyer from the time before and it was for a different service but I didn't know. The service I first attended was for Christ the King.

I haven't had any dreams lately, which I'm relieved of. I slept well.

I was thinking about the impression I had of the deer and me with the bag of arrows and the only thing I've pondered is why I didn't see a bow. I sort of saw the bag, and these long arrows but I almost think I threw it like a javelin. I looked up javelins now. The word I got with what I asked was "arrows" though. If it had been javelin, I would have heard this because I know the word. But I don't exactly remember any bow. Just the bag and arrows that were longer and flexible and one going toward the deer. I got this for me, in answer to my question, and then saw a woman but I didn't know who it was, in the drab clothing and then when the arrow was thrown, I saw the deer and eyes like I was only feet away. Sort of shifting viewpoints which makes it confusing as to whether this was another woman or me or a combination of something for me and also seeing someone else.