My CPS Case: Power to Harm

I had someone recommend I share this email I wrote to Marie, the CPS worker assigned to my son's case. I sent this to her on the 23rd. Things have only gotten worse since then.

Marie,

The first couple of times I called my son, he babbled back, and had lots to say and sounded cheerful. He started playing on the other end. If I said I was going to come get him, he'd run into the bathroom and shut the door, waiting for someone to find him, like we do at visitation. But now, he begins to whimper and sounds EXTREMELY unhappy. I think my son is really having a hard time and is suffering. I have never heard my son make the noises he's been making. It's different from a temper tantrum. It's a very sad sound. Like a cry in a way, but a whimper too. And then he sort of makes a wailing noise. He does NOT sound happy. Tonight I called him and he did this again, only stopping when I sang songs to him. Otherwise, he would make this noise. I think what you are doing, in keeping him from me and not allowing more visitation, is having a distinct impact on him. I think my son is traumatized by hearing my voice and being reminded he doesn't see me. The first couple of times he was playing on the other end, as if he expected me to come out from a corner and be there. He sounded excited and extremely talkative and happy. Now, he's sounding very depressed. The excuse tonight was that he was hungry. Okay, so then he ate, and he was still doing this. My son is NOT okay and it grieves me that you are doing nothing about it. I've made several attempts and requests to see him more and know this is IN MY SON'S BEST INTERESTS but you are ignoring this. You are claiming you don't have time, or monitors, or money, and blame ME for being over here, and making scheduling "difficult". I've never made visitation difficult. I'm the one calling ahead to get times down pat and to know where I'm going so I can be there. And I've been there, on time, for every visit except the last because my lawyer said he had documents for me which he ended up not getting back to me about. My son sounds very, very, sad. Your response, so far, is that you claim to know he needs more time with me, but that it's impossible to do this. Your organization purposefully PREVENTED me from seeing my son for TWO WEEKS after I called to arrange visitation. He went almost a month without seeing me and he LOST WEIGHT when he was separated from me. Then I hear about things later, how, a month and a half later, he doesn't cry for me anymore at night, for a half hour. How he doesn't wake in the night crying for me, anymore. How he doesn't wake up in the morning, screaming and crying for me, anymore. I hear he's not "subdued and sad and quieter than usual" as much. Then, after he's no longer quiet and subdued, I hear he's acting out, and you guys are telling my aunt this is "normal". This is NOT FUCKING "normal". This is tragic and YOUR organization is to blame. You have ruined my son's life and created a troubled soul in someone who was previously trusting and knew he could count on me. You have shaken his fundamental faith that he can trust adults to be there and not leave, you have shaken his faith in stability. You have removed his mother, who he loves, from his life in a way he cannot process or understand and he clings desperately to my AUNT and goes to her over me now, at visitation, after having to bond to someone during this trauma. He doesn't think he can count on me. I "left" him. My aunt was there for him when he was most afraid and now he doesn't even know how to feel towards me. The last 2 times I visited he went with my aunt, but kept looking back at me, all the way to the car, looking for me, with a sad and confused expression. Why wasn't I coming? Why would I just leave him? Was he bad? What did he do wrong? He's not a BLOB. Children are NOT FUCKING "resilient". He's not a bouncy ball or an object. My son is extremely in tune with himself and even if he cannot express himself in words, he is very intellectual and sensitive. He is not "fine" and you're doing NOTHING about it. I am my son's "advocate". This fucking CASA guy is a puppet who will agree with whatever you say. He's a yes man and HE doesn't know my son. He's seen my son maybe 2 or 3 times and HE suddenly knows what is best for my son and how my son feels about things? I know my son better than all of you, and what I'm hearing from my son, and seeing, is that he is not okay, and you're not listening to him. Do you GET this?! YOU ARE NOT LISTENING TO MY SON. I AM. YOU FUCKING FIX THIS. If you ignore these repeated and documented requests, you will be held accountable. If I sue for anything, I will sue on behalf of my son, for his damages and your irresponsible negligence in removing my son because of SUSPICION without GROUNDS and refusing to HELP him when I make repeated requests on his behalf. You want fucking "mentally ill"? You will be fucking mentally ill after I publicize the way your organization has handled this entire affair. Cameo