i forgot to do one thing today but got a lot of other things done. i believe my iron levels are still low because i've been very tired still, but i'm not having things happen that were happening at the other place. which affected my heart, and caused my legs to swell, and where i was medicated without consent among other things. oh, and caused a very severe thinning of my blood to where i would bleed over anything. and that's where there was very extreme overheating and it was NOT all "psychic" either, and this is where the plane went overhead and i got blasted about that time, and what else? there was no way i could get anything done when i was there. it was impossible. i still have to get my things from there.
i still have to find out the decision of the housing program people, and get into an apartment and the state is trying to terminate rights.
the social worker gave me the wrong time for an appointment with the psychiatrist and then hasn't rescheduled with him even though she knows.
it appears they are trying to deprive my son of visitation time again, as well, by claiming next Monday is a holiday, when they are required to schedule around these things in advance. I think this will make it, possibly, the 30th visit that my son has been deprived of with me, because of THEM, and that's when he has only received 4 hours a week with me anyway and they claim a security guard is needed for each and every visit which is a lie and everyone here knows it.
i woke up again, and had a bad feeling until about 7 a.m. or so. lately, something has been going on in the mornings that isn't right and i sense it and then it will change.
i worked on getting my unemployment today. i talked to both d.c. and wenatchee offices and got the name of the guy who is supposed to be the liason for coordinating the information and combining my hours and wages from both states. i was told it was a "tony" and now i'm finding out his name is chris prescott and he's from Olympia. d.c. told me that according to what they have, it shows my claim is completely "inactive" in Washington state, even though WA people have been telling me it is active and would not go inactive if I were on GAU temporarily. So I have been told many different things. I also contacted the IRS and they're submitting a request for my W-2 to be re-sent to me. All this time, people were lying to me and trying to keep me from getting anywhere with my claim. A LOT of lying. I got someone decent over in D.C. today.
my next thing to do is find out where my lawyer is, for this case and to get a continuance based on the fact i've had all these things going on which prevented me from representing myself or having a lawyer that did anything.
my lucky guesses were that i knew this one place had sub sandwiches today. I have no idea how I knew, but I knew, and knew they were up for grabs, and the guy outside told me, yes, they'd had subs that day. They don't everyday. I said, "Really?" and he said yes. Then no one would confirm it with me but i looked at the date on the wrapper. this will sound weird...i think i might know what clairaudience is, and clairvoyance, or in christian terms, it's described with another vocabulary (i found a good book that explains psychic and spiritual giftings from a unique perspective the other day and i'll have to write about it. i think it's called 'the gift'). I have read about "smelling" things psychic-ly and to me, that sounds absolutely bizarre, but I swear i "almost" thought i could smell subs but maybe I walked past a cafe or something, but then still, what does a "sub" smell like...the whole combo? and anyway, I walked in and subs! i got a sub sandwich. i think the strangest thing, is that i literally "smelled" subs when there were no subs around me but i somehow knew and then confirmed with this guy before going in. no one said anything to me either. now THAT, if it were not real and right, would sound SO nuts. But I have read about this kind of thing--"smelling" things and yet I would say it's one of the most unreliable of the giftings and...what's the point?!
then, i went to this church and every week a different church in town might have a food bank, from all over town and it's random (as far as I know). i had a hunch i knew where it was today and i was right. He asked if I'd called Serve Wenatchee and said no, (i just 'knew'?).
i prayed today, after I got home, for God to bless and increase my giftings and help me to be responsible and wise with them. I don't know what that will mean but I think it is also a scary prayer. I mean, it's a good one, but it's one with a burden too, sometimes and we might not understand everything that goes along with it.
I sometimes don't feel very "connected" to God.
Right now, I feel a deep sadness vibe. It's 9:45 p.m. PST and I also did after I got off the phone with the IRS. I don't always know what it's from. Actually, I think this clock is off by about 15 minutes or so. I don't now, I'll wait to hear from the radio what time it really is.
I do know that when I prayed out loud for my son, in our last visit, I immediately felt and sensed the presence of God, right then and there, where I felt neutral before. God was right there and heard my prayer. what the outcome, I don't know, but I felt it very powerful and strong and I think my son did too.
Sometimes it seems I have to spend a lot of time praying to get to a "breakthrough" and then other times, it could be just a few short lines, and I feel it's been received.
So thankful to God.
Last night I fell asleep to classical and woke at 2 songs in the night and remembered them. I had many dreams but don't remember any of them. I woke with Tchaikovsky and also there was this operatic and very short English ballad about "beauty" something and then the guy read the lines from the song out loud so maybe it was sung in another language initially but it was so beautiful and I heard the words and then fell asleep again. I heard the entire song and those words and then back to sleep.
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there was just now a "to celebrate" by some st. peter choir I think.
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here's a link to clairalience (sense of smell). i thought it was clairsentience but that's more of the empathetic thing. i am much more doubtful of clairalience and can't say i've ever thought anything like this or had this experience except for maybe 1-2 times but it could have been today, that as i was thinking about subs, i went past a restaurant that was at least baking bread or something and this reinforced the idea of "i want a sub!" so anyway. but while sometimes it's probably a sign of something weird, there are too many accounts from others who are otherwise normal, for it to be discounted. http://mysticbanana.com/what-you-have-smelled-with-clairalience-and-what-was-its-meaning.html. this has comments from all kinds of people, from atheists to catholics to wicca types, to skeptics.
one other time have i sensed a smell but i figured it was coming from someone or something in the general location. it was almost a decade ago and i smelled violets when none were around and it was a very strong smell. the only 2 times i ever smelled something but didn't know where it was coming from, was today but i did pass a restaurant while thinking about subs, and then the one other time, when it was very strong violets and there was no woman around with this fragrance on and no violets in sight. it happened when i walking through a monastary.
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