Today, I could tell my son was okay again. His eyes didn't bother him at all and he wasn't trying to conceal anything either. He's just better. Still has circles but they may go away. He still talks about closing his eyes being "scary" and nighttime and sleep, but whatever was hurting him before isn't, or doesn't seem to be, an issue now. He's also put on weight and was in good spirits too.
I had a very calm and positive vibe the whole way through and do now as well. When he first came in, I could see him walking in and he looked sort of sad. I don't know. I can just read my son. But as soon as I opened the door and peeked around the corner, he saw me and started laughing and ran around someone's legs to hide, and peek back at me, laughing the whole time.
I almost feel like crying, I guess from happiness but a little sadness too. Sadness that he doesn't see me more, but I'm so happy his health is returning and also thankful for the good things. And, I started to think about how he, once again, tried to take care of me, in this visit, and was so grown up. I guess I should save it for last, and go in order in this detail, but at the very end, I told him I might take a short walk and I was going to think about him and write abuot our visit. He said, "Mama! No, don't go! Stay here for me!" and I reassured him I wasn't going to go away but just take a small walk and then I would be right back, waiting for our next visit. He said okay then, and then he looked at my sweater and pulled it together, and said to me, "I don't want you to get cold" as he tried to zip my sweater up for me. ("I don't want you to get cold.") So I said thank you and how thoughtful, and let him zip me up and then he paused and said, no, let's get this up higher or something and zipped me to my chin. Sue thought it was really cute too and said "aaawww." I said, "You're a sweetie!" and Oliver said, "No! Not Sweetie. I'm OLIVER!" And we all laughed. I guess I couldn't wait to save this for the end of my detail, because it just touched my heart that he did this. He did other things too. I will be right back to write about it.
After Oliver was playing hide and seek and laughing, then we went to the room and there was a large stuffed black bear in the corner. I said, "Oliver! Look over there!" and he looked and had a big grin and said, "It's a bear!" and so I went over to it and felt it to see if he could sit on it and he could so I asked if he wanted to sit on the bear and he happily got on and then I pushed the bear across the room. He asked me to stop at the bookcase because he wanted to get a book. He chose Dr. Suess, "Would You Rather Be A Bullfrog?"
I asked him if he wanted to sit on my lap for the story (as he usually does) or if he'd rather sit on the bear while I read. He smiled saying he'd sit on the bear, so I faced him and held the book in front of him and read, which was fun for a change bc usually we're side by side but I got to see his expressions more and he looked up at me more and grinned and answered the questions in the book, as to whether he'd be a "dog or a cat". This time, when it came to being one thing or a "spook", he said, "I want to be a suit." I laughed and said suits were good and so are spooks. Again, he prefered being a piece of "smelly cheese" to a soda drink.
Then he wanted to play a game, Chutes and Ladders, but got distracted with Hi-Ho Cherry-O and said he wanted to play this instead. He wanted the stuffed monkey to play the game with him and for me to do a puppet show. I realized I need to come up with a puppet show idea. I set something up on the spot, but didn't know what to say. I asked him what the setting should be and he said with cars. So I had the monkey pretending to be interested in race cars and then he wanted the bear to come after him and bite his foot as he pretended to get away.
Oh, the first thing he said, which I thought was interesting, was when he first looked in my bag, while we were in the meet-up offices, he said, "Taco Bell!" and I said, "How did you know???" and I stared into the bag. I asked him, "Oliver, did you know the picture for Taco Bell or did you read it?" and he said, "I read it". He may have been right because later he was looking at a book in the room and I asked if he was "looking at it" or "reading it" and he said, "I'm looking at it." So he wasn't claiming to read it.
Sue told me today that he is able to point out how to get to his house and that he knows directions for someone driving. She'll ask which way to turn and he'll tell her, correctly.
So I tried the puppet show but then he wanted to go onto other things, but with the monkey speaking. He freely talks to the monkey and says "Monkey, would you like something to eat" and calls the animal "monkey". So he and the monkey had snacks and he fed the monkey and had the monkey playing with him. I showed him this baby doll, since he's interested in babies, but I guess he likes the real thing. He wasn't interested in a plastic one. He looked at the eyes and said, "Scary" and when he saw the stuffed bears eyes, he said, "Scary eyes". So, with the problems with his own eyes, I think, he says something about other eyes.
He had a few bumps and knocks today but all natural from playing. In one instance, he was waiting for me to set up a treasure hunt and sat backwards in a chair and then rocked it or leaned over too far and fell over when my back was turned. He was okay. Another time, he pretended to fall over dead, and did it without looking and nearly hit his head on the bookshelf and I told him it was very, very, good acting, so believable, but to make sure he's not going to hit his head before he tries it. Then he put a cherry from the game in his mouth again but spit it out when I offered the monkey's hand. He wouldn't do it for me, but he did it for the monkey. It isn't that important, right now, for me to discipline him or be very strict in our visits. I might work on things more if we had tons of time, but I'm not going to waste our short amount of time together, on defining boundaries, and most of the time he respects me and others. I am strict if it comes to safety, but not as much for other things. When he got his bumps, he came to me for a kiss and was better.
As we were snacking he decided to feed me. So I said thank you. And then I said to him I had noticed how he's been helping mama and trying to be so thoughful and I said, "You're only 3 but you're very grown up, aren't you?" and he looked into my eyes and nodded and smiled. He took this comment very deeply, and then just wanted to keep feeding me. I was full so he then wanted to offer some to Sue and Sue was kind enough to accept his gift and put it in her pocket. He wanted to bend over backwards being helpful then, or grown up, so I said, "Do you think you help Mommy with something else?" and he nodded readily. I asked him if he would throw an item away for me and then if he would like to bring me a piece of paper for making clues for our treasure hunt. I felt sort of bad asking him to do "chores" for me, but he enjoyed it and they were small requests and made him feel, I don't know. He wanted to do it, and then he sat there as I made clues and then we hid them and this time the treasure was a Reese's Peanut Butter cup hidden inside my boot (wrapped of course). He liked the idea of pb and chocolate together and ate this right away.
When Sue said it was about time to go, he looked at the wall and turned to Sue and said, "Sue, where's the clock?!" and Sue showed him her wristwatch and I asked him if he'd like to look at it. "There's a clock on Sue's watch" I said, so he went over to look and Sue explained the time and he counted out the numbers to 12 accurately.
He gave many spontaneous hugs and kisses.
At the end, I wrote out a calendar for him and he asked me to make a big smiley face for him again. So I did, and wrote he was special and a big helper. He took this and then he had his coat and shoes and everything on and he came over to me after I said I might take a little walk, and he decided he should zip me up, after he was assured I would be right there for him for our next visit.
It was really cute. Oh, we also read this 10 apples on top book and he wanted the monkey to turn the pages with his felt paw and it kept slipping and he laughed out loud. So he said he'd help the monkey and turned the pages for the monkey.
He said he'd had a good time playing with the kids at daycare the day before. He took everything I'd brought with him and this juice that I brought, which he liked. He didn't want to take his shoes off unless I had my shoes off. Then he took his shoes off. He wanted his coat left on, and he wanted my sweater unzipper so my brighter flowered shirt was showing, and he liked the colors.. I showed him where I had spilled a little bit of blue oil paint on my shirt, and then pointed out it looked like he may have been painting too, because of the green on his coat. So the sweater was unzipped until at the end, he wanted to zip me up.
At the last visit, he grabbed the pendant that was on a chain around my neck and kept twisting it back and forth and wanting me to hold him. I told him I had never taken it off since he put it on.
I hope the rest of his week goes well and that he is even better by next Monday.