thoughts about Di

I read more about Di last night and then this morning. It confirms more and more that her main cause of distress in the later years, was the idea that she was losing her sons. I didn't know it but she only got ONE out of every FIVE weekends with her sons, in the settlement. Meanwhile, Tiggy was spending a lot more time with them and then calling them "my babies". I don't know how anyone could blame Di, at all, for what pressure she was under. I read, but take it all with a grain of salt until I can sort through things. I always thought Tiggy sounded great for the kids, but as a mother, I am sympathetic now to Di. They were her children and she was being pushed away from them.

I read an article last night, about Di not being able to wait to unwrap presents and the press called it an "almost infantile" enthusiasm. A commenter wrote that it was so wrong to be derogatory about Di, and that she too had this kind of enthusiasm, and then I thought...Hmmm. Need to figure out which teams the papers were on. Because from what I hear, Di and Charles teams used different papers or publications to sometimes leak to. I do believe they were friends later but there were definitely Di haters. I guess there were Charles haters too.

I cannot imagine what it would be like to be a Princess and yet only have an occasional weekend with ones children.

I'm reading the Simone Simmons book. I don't know that Di would have wanted Simone to "tell it like it is" regarding her sexual life, but well...there's a little bit of everything in this one. I mean really. On the back cover there is a quote: "Simone, if anything happens to me, write a book and tell it like it is." I hardly think Di was talking about letting the world know her rating system for lovers. "If anything happens to me...make sure to let the ladies know to steer clear from Oliver Hoare." Make sure the world knows how much Hewitt likes cashmere. Make sure the world knows what "jumping my bones" means because really, it's fitting, should something ever occur, that the world knows.

I might have to delete most of what I just wrote. Had to get it out but will probably delete. The book is actually well written with a lot of detail but the main thing is that it's too bad she gave so much information to fortune tellers or took serious stock in it. I do beleive in psychic gifts. But telling someone to do this or that or giving advice on "fortune" is so wrong and potentially very damaging. If it's true that she did interviews because of their advice, it's really horrible.

I do feel it is right about the Queen's attitude. She might be a tough cookie, but I think there is a lot of understanding and I think Di and the Queen had an unspoken desire to help one another but maybe didn't know how to get it across.

I have found I enjoy analysing video clips. I've never taken a psychology class but I really enjoyed reading the video of Charles' gaffe and guessing about their personalities and instincts and skills. I don't know. And I've watched that video many times and it makes me laugh. After I did this, I felt such elevation, that I am skilled at something and enjoy it, that I finished and thought, "Why are people holding me down here?" and I felt more like myself again. To able to take something apart and look at it from different angles and not be too bad at it.

I might do a few more.

One small secret...which might be something I'm totally wrong about because I haven't seen enough...but with just one or two clips...I felt William was actually more intuitive with children and the vulnerable even though he was Mr. Bossy Boots once and that Harry is more intuitive with the press, even though he's been the rebel and press disaster. I would have to see more clips. William looks very happy with children around and Harry could pick himself up more and be a great leader. It's all there, he's just always been known as "the spare". The sparecrow, said in a light way. I don't mean that he should change his ways really as much as that I think people will start to see him for his accomplishments.

I enjoy seeing the family clips to see who Di was dealing with but I am focused on her and not her family really, for what I'm doing.

It's good to see what the press is about too, a little bit, in sorting things out, because everything is so contradictory. One source will say Di felt sorry for Princess Michael and another will say she said she wouldn't ever courtesy to "that b----". It doesn't matter at all, this, for what I'm doing, but it makes everything something to be contrasted.

I really shouldn't even read anything about W and H because that's not the focus of my book, but it's kind of interesting. What's more important, is when I read Simone claiming Di was "bulimic" in her youth before she ever met Charles and yet in Di's "true story" by Morton, which was based on her own words, she didn't pick this up until maybe a week or more after a comment was made about her being "chubby", during her engagement.

I saw a clip of Fergie in an interview and she looks very natural though she didn't like being quized about Charles' engagement to Camilla. She said what she should say but it didn't look like she was saying what she really thought. She averted her eyes.

It's all hard to figure out, but I think if Di had any disorder it was probably an adjustment disorder in coping with her new situation. Then, basically PTSD. I think she was rightfully paranoid and that it wasn't unreasonable but rational paranoia. She knew she was always under surveillance and she didn't like Tiggy moving in when she was seeing her own sons so seldom.

I think Di and Charles had artistic differences and she just didn't know how to compete with Camilla. Really, I hear how Camilla speaks to Charles and her way of comforting him and praising him and it's very...well, I don't know many women who know how to pet an ego like that but women did this in the past. Not many women know how to do this. I don't believe the Queen does this with Philip either. Any woman who can do this, has serious talent, in my opinion.
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I had to look. How in the world did Prince William manage to get himself photographed peeing??? Seriously. I looked at the photos and yes, he's really peeing...at a polo game? I mean, he doesn't even have people around him to cover for him. It's like he wanted to do this or didn't care.