Very Strong Today

I had a bad thing happen first thing in the morning, but it didn't shake me. The energy today is so good. I feel so calm and strong, from first rising, and even the small bad things, don't feel bad. I don't know what I have to be thankful for really, except thank you God for this peace. And for whatever is going right for many others.

Sometimes I think I think I pick up on a lot of contrasting things maybe from the holidays. I was so happy, or have been happy to discover, I'm really not a nut in this! I have met a lot of people, in Wenatchee even, who say they know what I mean about a "vibe" or "energy".

I have a small headache which is due bc I usually get a migraine about now but I smoked cigs more to see if it would improve things.

As for my poems and things, I want to say I didn't have anyone in mind and it was all pure imagination. Nothing more, and I don't know of anyone reading "village of the damned" or any of these things. I just wrote for sheer release and fun. No, I don't know anyone in MI5 either. ;) I was just mixing up life with imagination. I am only playing around with stuff.

Thank you God though, for what is right in the world today and please help it to be right for others who feel down.

A few fun things to write about...last night drinks and cookbook talk, and being able to cry a little bit. I really needed to cry and finally did.

Listening to "Take On Me" by a-ha.

I keep running into people who are exactly half Native American too! it's been interesting. Last night, a woman who was exactly half and then today first ting, a man who was half and then another man who was half. Three almost, in a consecutive row. Oh! And I got some hugs today! The last guy said I should have hugs and so I hugged everyone in the room.

Last night I had so much fun...drank a little bit, and talked, and poured through an old Pol Martin cookbook, one of my first cookbooks ever. I never imagined looking at a cookbook, while tipsy, could be SO much fun!

Oh my goodness, everything sounds SO good when you're tipsy. I couldn't believe it. It's like food magnified and the guy liked the cooking channel so he didn't mind at all when I was listing all the ingredients to all these recipes.

I picked it out from his shelf and said, "I don't know WHO Pol Martin is, anyway, but I love him and his cookbook!" He has these nice illustrations on how-to and it was my first cookbook.

So we talked a LOT about seafood and steak. And we listed our preferred hierarchies on meat. I said for me, it would be seafood, then steak, then pheasant, then chicken, then ground beef, and then this guy brought up grouse, which i know nothing about. I asked about cornish hen, where they might rank.

I said I thought oysters should never be smothered in cheese, and he agreed. A sauce, where it sort of gives the flavor but doesn't "stick". And I remembered making Steak in Green Peppercorn Sauce for a lot of various company when I was younger.

Oh, it was SO fun. I forgot I like to cook so much! So we went through and I read recipe after recipe, listing ingredients. I started out with veal actually. Osso Buco. Then we went through and I was just drooling over all the Flambeed Scampi and Scallops. We talked about mussels and decided one thing sounded good and the other ideas were crap. I didn't get into the desserts except for the pudding and creme brulee types. One was a sort of creme brulee with caramel and orange. So yummy. But I said I liked most everything sauteed and with butter and a little lemon. How can it be improved upon? We decided zucchini, mushrooms, onions...mmm, and even eggplant. I told him I had sauteed an eggplant the other day and forgot how good it is.

Then we were on to steak. Filet mignon and tenderloin and other meats too. Rump roast. Humble but so good. I didn't know what steak tartare was until I found it again and thought it looked gross. Raw ground beef with an egg yolk? but we thought all kinds of things are good to try and I said I would even try frog's legs. I draw the line at eyeballs. I said the texture would be gross and he agreed.

I said something aboutr Swiss Steak and he brought up, then, Salisbury Steak. There were some really good recipes for sauces.

Anyway, just talked about ingredients and what would be good and what wouldn't be good, for an hour or more.

I know I have to do it again. There should be cookbook and drinking parties. Like, you just get a little soused and start reading cookbooks. FUN. I never thought so much fun. Then I thought, wow, maybe even cooking while tipsy, that could be interesting. Maybe not. I am like my mom. Making something good and then getting distracted and it's burnt. I told this guy I never knew I liked scallops and that they weren't rubbery until I tried them outside of my mom's house. This guy said, yeah, they're done in 3 minutes. My Dad called my mother "The Scorch Queen", all in good humor. Which is what I do. Start making something and then forget about it. But I said, "No one knows what a good mom I am! how can I like to cook like this and not be a good mom!"

We even talked about bananas paired with steak and how we wouldn't do that, but maybe on the side, with the cumin. I said the cumin would sort of cut the sweetness of the banana. But it needed something else too. He said yes and we agreed it would be best "on the side".

Oh and curry! He asked me what the name was of the ingredient used in curry because I said some curries are better than others for sure. I said it was "saffron" and he said, "Oh yes!" Then we talked about paella.

I also told him about I used to get this nan bread and slightly toast it in the oven and then use it with kefir cheese with this middle eastern seasoning mix and a little olive oil. With kalamata olives on the side.

Anyway, it was so much fun. I absolutely forgot that I enjoyed this kind of thing, and it was especially fun while under the influence! lol! I had a solid one too many and then burst into tears over my woes but it felt good. I haven't been able to let go and cry and I said to him, I wish everyone could know what I'm really like, when I don't have my guard up, because I'm really nice inside and like everyone and just have to fight stuff all the time. I said it would be better if I could meet everyone with a drink in hand.

So I think it would be fun to do it again and also to meet more people who like to talk about food while drinking. It's really fun to discuss. I forgot how much I know about seasonings and pairings actually.

We even talked about meatloaf. He said it's better with elk meat but I said I don't really like the idea of ground up meat mixed in with bread. But I know so many people like meatloaf!

I just found this song and I don't know who does it but sort of a surprise:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6wPqPepZztg&NR=1&feature=fvwp It cuts off though.

We talked about dogs too. Dogs are fun to talk about, but food a little more. We talked about different breeds and types. He showed me a deer he killed. I guess it was an elk. I guess I wasn't grossed out. It's not really the actual hunt that bothers me, it's if something is going to suffer.

I told my son is really into "tracks!" and finding tracks. I told him, at every single visit my son has found "tracks" in the books, whether it's 'tracks' from a dripping ice cream cone, or tracks in the snow, it doesn't matter, and I told him, you'd never think there are so many "tracks" in books for kids.

Hmm, what else? I don't know. That was the fun stuff at least.

I need to write about my visit with my son.
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Oh! My dream! I had two parts to a small dream last night.
It was about guppies and goldfish and I was going to rescue them to take to my son and then I had a woke up wondering about my cousin in Canada and what she's doing.
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1:40 P.M. something about the energy has changed. Not as good or strong. More sad or something. Not really bad at all, just a little different. Not that anything is wrong, but I feel like I'm picking up on an empathetic vibe that has someone feeling sad or there is something going on to undo what is right.

I talked to this man today who said he listens to his daughter and wife because they're usually right about things, and they feel the same stuff.

Now it feels okay again, but something was sad for a moment.

10-20 minutes later, feels better. I called about my son to see if he was alright.