The two go in hand. I had to work on fixing so many things, and keeping an eye on what's going on. I'm trying not to be impatient, but it takes a lot to upset me, and a lot of time too, and my patience is short at this point. Still, I try to be polite and am doing what I can do.
Not only have my son and I been totally railroaded in this "custody" case, they went from bad to worse. They care nothing about my son and his needs. It doesn't matter that our visits have been wonderful from the start, and that I'm an excellent mother. All these people want is information on ME, to punish ME, and to completely trash me all means possible.
Not to mention, I find it very strange and bizarre, the amount of cover up and money used for cover up, that has gone into this case. Not to mention the total invasion of privacy and insistence on lining me up, now, with a "panel of experts".
I think it's about time these people were matched with their own "panel of auditors".
The entire case is based on whether I have a mental illness or not. Whether or not I do, they don't want me to have my son. They already know that any legitimate "illness" would be one of temporance, due to the stress and trauma they began when they took my son and caused him terrible harm in the doing.
They have lied and then they lie more, and no one holds these people accountable for anything they've done. Not one thing.
They have purposefully obstructed justice with unnecessary delays, lying, and attempts to block my right to objective evidence.
The latest is that, today, my lawyer told me CPS wanted to have me go to Seattle to see a panel of experts and, he said, they wanted a neurologist, and a psychiatrist, and yet were open to seeing if there was anything or anyone else I'd like to add, he said, like an orthodontist or something.
Why the HELL would I want an ORTHODONTIST to evaluate me for a fucking custody case?
This is absolutely out of control.
I looked at my lawyer and said nothing about the "orthodontist". What I said, was "This neurological evaluation is a simple neuro exam, not a psychiatric one. It is specifically written that a normal head exam is first and then possibly after that, a psychiatric evaluation with "recommendations"." I told him, "They are trying to sneak this in, and you KNOW it."
Then, I added, "And your secretary told me they snuck in NOT making up visits, and this is totally wrong." He said he didn't know and would have to look.
How does he not know this is an attempt to "diagnose" and try to force medication or other, without allowing me time for an independent psychological evaluation first?
They know I've been discussing this with my family, getting an independent psych eval done, and all of a sudden, they want to rush in and try to get ahead of something that will, they know, totally contradict what THEIR "report" says.
If my independent psych eval is more normal, then the object is to take the least "instrusive" treatment or remedy, if anything is needed (counseling, whatever) at all.
By trying to get ahead of this, the state wants to make a shoddy evaluation "stick" by claiming a psychiatrist has made recommendations to go with it.
The Judge ordered that a plain neuro exam could be done and that was it. The purpose is to see if there is any "damage" and even this is unnecessary if I don't have problems arising from "damage". In other words, an independent evaluation would probably make having a head exam completely moot, because no normal professional psychologist, in THEIR right mind, would make the claims that the other woman made.
My own lawyer also tried to tell me I didn't have the right to know what materials went to the state psychologist, about me. I stared at him, shocked. This is like saying the defense doesn't have the right to an independent evaluation from their funds.
I told him it is NECESSARY and MY RIGHT to see what materials someone is given, so that I may have a chance to RESPOND to them if they are wrong, out of context, or if I have my own supplementary materials to counter with.
What the hell is going on.
Meanwhile, I was told I could use their boardroom and office resources for my case, (phone, fax, whatever) and then this morning someone told me no, not anymore. I had to talk to someone else and he agreed to allow it, but only "1 hour per day" which isn't enough time. He said "to start" so perhaps that will be increased, but they all know I can't get anything done with just 1 hour a day. That's 5 hours a week and so far, I've done more than my lawyer has on my case, and he's been redesignated as second chair. They already know that I know this case in and out and that I have done law before, and know the angles and strategies and how things get set up.
Basically, I have enough knowledge to know what needs to be done. So in a way, I make a good director. Which isn't what most lawyers want, but when I sit back and do nothing, I'm being told to allow the state to slip in all kinds of things which prejudice my position and my son's rights.
I also noticed how eager some of these people are, to have me go "out of the area" again when they know about all the problems I had last time, with someone trying to even kill me. It's not that Wenatchee is safer, but until I have better means, it is true that it is harder to make a quick escape and not be noticed in a small town.
There is absolutely no need for me to go out of the area to have a neurological exam done. It is going to be pretty much the same thing, no matter where I go. It can be done here!
"Panel". Yeah, I'm gonna ask for an ORTHODONTIST to join their psychiatrist and neurologist, because my teeth might be the problem here.
The problem is very, very, simple and can be said in one word:
"Corruption"
I have people bringing up threats again. Threats on my life. There shouldn't be cause for it and I don't have to be "nuts" not to be a threat.
My goal is, and if this is "threatening" there is something wrong...My goal is to simply show what the truth is regarding my mental state and that I am not and was never a risk to my son. Sure, I agree I have issues, but none that are serious or which pose any kind of risk to anyone.
I believe I can do what is possible. There's no reason not to be able to put forth a simple and persuasive argument for having visits increased and my son returned to me.
It is unnecessary to try to trash me. It doesn't do any good for anyone. It is also not my "goal" or motive, to turn around and sue left and right. My focus is my son.
I am doing all that I can to get him back. I will be able to show my efforts at trying to get work and also at trying to get into housing. I have more than enough evidence to show I have been and am a capable and loving mother.
I've made mistakes in the past like everyone, but my goal is to move forward.
On one hand, yeah, I was willing to totally let everyone trash me for the rest of my life, all in return for a few more hours a week with my son, so I could see the eventual goal was reunification. But my willingless to cooperate and to do MORE than to cooperate, to basically sacrifice my entire reputation on a mental illness hanger, was rejected. In response then, I have nothing to do than to make a reasonable and rational case for myself and for my son.
I have one priority, and it's my son. Everything I do reflects this, whether there is a lot to "show" for what I do, my efforts have been unending.
There's no just cause for harming my son further and I have confidence that in doing the right thing, despite the odds, it is the best thing to do. I am going to be true to myself, to my son, and to my God, and there is nothing dangerous, risky, or "wrong" about that.
But yeah, while I like my lawyer and think he seems nice and we laugh and he even blushed today, I feel like he's either getting pushed around or doesn't know enough about my case yet. So I'm hoping this will turn over, and I'm doing what I can to work fast and help him to understand this case.
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