poems of sorts freewriting

if you only knew
knew which sock i was knitting when they told me to turn
when i was pushed back from the book
all books down are star wars
upon my head erasing me
my life to be replaced
if you only knew
le resistance, my resistance, my will
is stronger than the oak tree
you lifted up a steel door to a warehouse
and someone brought it down
rolling out like raiders of the lost ark
i kept my hat and lost my shirt
feeling a way to mystery
weaving a reed basket
trying to tell the truth of the pressure
have you known this pressure
under torture
have you withstood it
how long in this country until someone can break
your back and take everything or try
to put my hand into a glove
turning me around with a blindfold on
laughing to pin the tail on the donkey
as my child is screaming and sobbing for me
the innocence
it seems i must defend the wicked
to live
i must believe in those who torture me and my son
hideous wrapped twisted metal and steel
hovering, with religion mixing
tearing the dress and every small thing
but glorying in my substance
using me as a key
to unlock doors
caring nothing about liberty
heart in my throat
throat in their grip
iron wills to destroy me all but leave a shell
and call the mortar wasteland
ring my son like ringing bell
to call the mortar wasteland
ringing in our private hell
we call it mortar wasteland
the landmine is threaded throughout
this country and the next
*****************************************
how much for the souls which hang as shrouds
laced from trees with clouds
seeing their shape they mimic gaping fish
baby birds crying, peeping with open beak
poking a drill through paper white sheets
with their cries as some press round circles
onto their beaks
"these are great punchholes"
the little white discs edged in paper lace
stained above from coffee cups at church
sitting on tables at sharis and dennys
where french fries were a small price to pay
for taking someone's life
to ruin it...to drive to distraction one life
out of a shrill bile seeping from the nails
she mixes her paint with purple and crimson
and paints the faces of the women
putting stripes into their hair
gods hands pulling on the strand with silver dust
finding a gummy residue from the sticky
mercury, the color of
same hands twist the strands and send to lab
no one looking at the teeth, blood or skin
sending it to virginias best
who took the contract from the devils best
bringing it to the table like an offering
faust, i am, this knowledge may set us ahead
if we can harness this and never pay
if we can steal and keep the secret in an aluminum
box with a latch, if we can use the satellites as stars
putting them into position as if all creation
has nodded to the thing we made
we destroyed claiming to create
we tortured in the name of jesus and god of israel
claiming our stakes were important
we used sticks and guns and things which most cannot see
to push people into the same pen
we watched the christians laugh as they laid out
"god loves you" in threes
that your hand like a mighty fist would pound the earth
and split the sky
that these who place idols above simplicity and truth
that these idols would be taken up and swallowed
and the people fall into the abyss.
your people a disgrace to your name
your people destroying evidence of their crimes and asking for
a blessing
believing this is what they deserve
a blessing
wanting to torture anyone who does not agree
there will be no blessing
the end does not justify the means
the end itself is not justified
trading truth for a lie
*********************
joseph of arimatha, shekinah, ashra, melekahn, izreel, melan, melan.

ayku, sherda

(some of this is just freewriting and is probably messed up with other things)
amelikah (sounds like ah-mel-i-kah) kerenth (sounds kair-enth)?
ay-ter-seed, kor-inth (or kerenth)
maleka, mesheeba (may-sheeba) daytu
ellay-im orhah jah
mesa ory onyay
malika (or maleka-or sounds like mal-i-kah), erdu
malika (or maleka), yshu
kabimar karim ahnshu
air-rah
*********
I am NOT saying any of it means a thing. I am just trying for free flow, where anything or everything could come to mind and it could be different things or languages or jumbled, but the idea is to be as open minded as possible. I have been listening to a song at the same time so that's probably not conducive to this, but i thought I'd try it as an exercise and I'm NOT saying any of it is psychic whatsoever.
listened to "friday i'm in love" over and over.