Friday, January 28, 2011

Good Morning

Last night I figured out the headache stuff really wasn't me. I was lying with my head against the wall and had continued pressure as long as I laid there. I decided to try lying with my head at the other end of the bed, not expecting it to work, but wondering, and it quit.

It quit instantly. And then it was never so bad. I had to do a chore so I did and when I came back something was different. The whole time during chore I never had the headache either. Then I went back and in some light way someone was doing something, but it wasn't nearly as bad and I slept.

Then I got out this morning and no headache.

I got Earl Grey again and some oatmeal and oatmeal bars and water and I chose not to wear any make up again.

Today it felt easier. And my skin didn't look too bad because I had rested a little and had a lot of water the day before.

I had no plan of what I was going to wear but I decided on a white shirt. Sometimes I think ahead about what I'll wear but I had no idea today and just felt like since I'd worn my pajama jeans to bed again, I wanted something that looked and felt clean. So, my pajama jeans, my white long-sleeved shirt with a white tank beneath, black rose scarf, and red fleece with my boots.

I noticed someone yesterday who had that very unique color of blue eyes yesterday. I always wonder what race they are and still don't know. English? or Russian? he had a broad face and these very pale but not dull, light blue eyes. It's this one color. I saw him on the way to the museum yesterday.

I realized I'm not really into artifacts museums. I like glass, paintings and drawings, mixed medium, quilting and some crafts, and scupture.

I like looking at arrowheads and clay pots and guns and swords for just a little while and then I'm bored.

I liked this one section about "non-traditional forms of war" or something and was drawn to it and then guess what it was about?

zee spies! That's what I liked, was seeing this gun that was hand-made by someone living in the woods and it was really beautiful and doubled as a cane.

And then seeing other things where people hid one thing into something else.

And then I was just looking for the paintings and finally was excited to hear there were quilts too. I spent the most time looking at these things. A few I really liked and made mental notes on them. There was a watercolorist by the name Krutch who I liked and then I picked out which paintings I liked best and looked at the names. I liked Dury. There were a couple of others. One portrait of Andrew Johnson I liked but it was all the way at the top and I couldn't see it, however, I noticed how the painter had made his cloak with this appearance of velvet sheen and noticed it more than I might usually. With the quilts, the silk crazy quilt was my favorite for the colors and creativity. And I liked the doublet that was in a teal color and I can't imagine the work that went into it. A black and white one wasn't my favorite but I thought it was interesting for the kind of style it was, for that period of time. It turned your eye so that it seemed to be moving, like an MC Esher work. Other quilts were really beautiful or made well but maybe I just didn't care for the colors or design as much as the others.

The other thing I asked about was if there was an underground railroad section but there wasn't. Maybe they didn't have one of those in Tennessee if it wasn't close enough to the border. It was slightly depressing in some ways. At first, it felt just a little bit depressing, with the idea of slavery and seeing some of these interesting Indian artifacts that looked almost like Mayan indian or Aztec ruins and thinking about how much of that creativity was ruined by oppression.

I got to the Y and looked up cnn news first. I read the article about Egypt first and might look at a few more things.
I'm going to do this in a minute but in the meantime I looked up today's common prayer message. I guess it was a good day to wear white?

It is Psalm 51, and has a section about wash me so I am white as snow, make me clean. I was thinking about going to the prayer this morning and then looked up what it was today while I sat here. I dono't know if I'll go or not.

I've been listening to "Our God" by Chris Tomlin this morning, on repeat. It sort of reminds me of "Fix You" at one part, by Coldplay.

As for the weather...I debate on what to say. The thing that's odd is that I sort of, despite predictions, thought...I don't know.

I prayed against it but said, "God, i really don't want it to snow like last time. Last time was fine, and I didn't mind, but right now, it's okay and you can do whatever you want, maybe a little, but if you could make it sunny instead and warmer, that would be great. But it's up to you of course."

Then, we had this really light snow and then it turned to bright sun. I don't know if I am juust able to guess ahead of time or what. ?! Not all the time. I would hate to be the local rain-maker or weather wizard but sometimes I wonder.

I want to look up more about Egypt. Today on the way to the gym I passed this part of a basket or something, along the sidewalk, that made me think about Moses in the basket.

Last night I was feeling really hopeless about getting my son. So many strong powers against it and then spouting off like I did last night doesn't totally sound normal, but it's really a reaction to torture. And then the message was that if God is for you, who can be against you?

And they might be, but I have to have faith in God. What is the biggest shame is how he is now 4 years old and all this time taken from us.

I felt like efforts have been made hard enough to keep me from work again and then throw in the MTMHI event as well. I don't know who in this country or who outside of this country, can help me organize the facts and bring them out to prove my son is mine and that we have been persecuted.
I went to the church prayer at the episcopal church. It was a different reading than what I found online for anglican, through the website "". I don't know who organizes the readings for this one but think it's is from the Book of Common Prayer and today there is a saying about the house of prayer from Joel. The episcopal reading was of Psalm 40 and passages in Isaiah. All of it is good.

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