Good Morning World

From the only fully tortured and non-syndicated journalist in the U.S...

(good morning vietnam?)

I almost matched Prince Williams engagement photo tie today, but I decided that for the sake of world peace, I would wait on that until I put out a disclaimer of how I ended up with this clothing combination--it wasn't intentional.

So I put the black lattice scarf with the fushia shirt back into my closet and looked at a t-shirt with 2 doves that said "think global, start local" and had a tree in the center. I put it back because it's too cold out. So I said to God, "Okay, what should I wear?" and all I got, and it probably wasn't from God, but who knows and I know God knows all languages...I got "ciel."

Ciel?

Ciel is french for sky.

So I thought maybe sky blue and had this idea in my mind but I have nothing in that color and since it is cold out, I just took out a couple of wool and cashmere sweaters and one happens to be blue.

I might wear my fantastic and shocking black lattice web over the fushia flower look tomorrow or maybe another day entirely.

I am breaking to look up ciel on wiki and I guess there is a tincture of that name, and I...ThINK it's the same color (oh no) that came to my mind this morning. Greeeaaat. I'll have to look it up. I'm not reading it fully but ciel also refers (it says) to a color in heraldry also known as bleu celeste (heavenly blue).

Anyway.

I ended up with this scarf that has roses on it and it's black and grey with a little gold and has a black lattice fringe at the bottom. I didn't realize we could only choose 1 scarf and it so happened to be the one I got, randomly, when I went in on a certain day. Then, on a different day I had randomly taken this fushia shirt because I like the color and it reminded me of one I liked in Wenatchee months ago (last summer). I don't know when the engagement photos were out but I think I had this combo with me before they ever came out and I certaintly didn't notice the tie until I saw the photo on the mag at the grocery store maybe 2-3 days ago.

I had almost worn the scarf with that shirt several times but hadn't yet. If I do, the black lattice goes over the fushia and it matches William's tie. Which I thought was shocking and I put it on this morning and had so many looks from even homeless shelter women I thought, "Maybe I should explain first?" hehh heeh aaaaahhhh! as I end up on the rack again and my clothes in shreds. Hey, all it says is twins! right? peas in an alien pod. You say tomaytah, I say tomahtah.

Who picked that tie out anyway? that's what I wanna know.

(London cringes and decides it's going to be a double double dollop of cream day.)

Anyway. It's not a big deal, but judging by the saucers I saw with the homeless women, I was looking at the shirt with doves and the tree next.

Last night I sat next to this woman and asked God to show me something about how he felt about me because I felt degraded and tortured (as I am) and I had opened up to Ezekiel "2 eagles and a vine" and read this passage. I took it as a sign of hope that even if powerful people try to do one thing, God can take a branch and plant it himself and can make the low one high and high one low and the dry one flourish and the green one dry. After having someone tamper with my periods and fertility and medications and poisoning me, I hope I can still have kids. I should be able to, but this is one reason why I don't feel I want to be in this country any longer--no one is looking out for the civil rights of me and my son.

And what I thought was also strange was that before I opened to this passage, I had noticed someone staring at my socks. I had reported them yellow and they were, but the yellow ones were beneath the white ones which say on the top of them "dry-" and then have a right and left mark on them.

It was sort of funny because after I opened to this, the staff gave me a towel to dry off with and it was like this big deal. I don't know who is telling who what.

But whatever interpretation anyone else tries to make of it, I am the one who asked it of God and I am the one who can say how it was given and how I received it. And it was with good connotation for me and my family and not bad. So even though I don't put much stock in signs, if there are signs, and they are given to me, then I am the judge of the manner in which it was given. And it meant something to me, because I did not have a normal period this month as I should have and this is not because there is anything wrong with me other than others tampering with my body through torture and medication of me, which is immoral and wrong. I have completely normal periods, whenever I am not medicated, and at the same time, and regular, and the ONLY time I have ever had a change of any kind is when someone is giving me meds of some kind. And I have already known this has been done.

So I think God says "Fuck you".

He might even know how to say it in French.
*****************************
Now I'm looking up tincture ciel. I also read a nice connotation of ciel as the acronym for an international organization for environmental and civil rights, which is nice.

But I guess I got it as a word for a color, since I was asking what color God would have me wear today.
******************
I saw the colors on the wiki site. It was very close to this blue, but I saw it just slightly different, by a hair in a way. Maybe just a little bit lighter. I am trying to find the color exactly, but ciel is at least the word I got and then I was wondering what color that would mean. I read it is on RAF (or navy?) badges after WWI so I was trying to find an example of what a RAF badge looks like, just for the color, and I searched this after typing for other examples of ciel and not finding anything. I haven't found a clear example of a RAF badge yet but still looking. I might try yahoo and see if they have examples too.

Oh I can't tell.

I felt like wearing the fushia and had a good feeling about it but out of trying to be peaceful, decided to put my sword in its sheath.

No, I don't know. I was wearing this fushia and black combo and then turned to some passage about driving demons out of a man into pigs and thought "Will?" and thinking it was strange I ended up with the combo. Was it defeating the devil to don this combo or better to put it off? I then tried to go with the gracious thing and then I have made my disclaimer and now everyone can see I have a propensity for quiet modesty. I know there are some forces that are not good and I didn't want part, so this is why I prayed and hoped I was being sensible in even small things.

Then I got psalm 150 about praising God and sang this. I propped it up next to the sink while I put on my make up and just sang it through a few times.