Probable Twins, I Think

I am also now wondering why they wanted to give me Cytotec. They were ready to send me home, so I don't think it was totally necessary. They said either a D&C or Cytotec. But if there was an ectopic pregnancy, and it was still alive when the other fetus had died, it certainly died with the Cytotec.

I believe I had another baby. I think I was pregnant with twins. I think the Cytotec killed the ectopic baby or started shrinking it down. Either it died from the MRI like James River did, or it died from Cytotec. It would have started shrinking with the Cytotec, and on radiology reports, it says whatever was inside of my ovary, within one day, had shrank in size. The radiology was done from one day to the next. The Cytotec would cause the shrinking of a fetus in an ovary.

I would have tried to carry the other baby. Ovarian pregnancies are not as dangerous as tubal ectopics and ectopics in other locations. I would have totally given the other baby a chance.

I wanted both babies.

I believe I conceived twins, and both of them died.

I am listening to Coldplay today. First "I'll See You Soon" then "What If" then "Swallowed in the Sea" (could fall in love to that song), "Daylight", and then "Shiver".

My roommate needs computer and I'm going to try to get some fresh air. I took an extra pain pill and feel slightly better. I'm on about 2 Percocet right now. When I write later, I'll write about the people I noticed at ER when I was there last, and in the waiting room, and I'll write about some things I've realized--new discoveries I've made about myself, life, and the possibility of falling in love.