My Posts About My Son, Giftedness & Lefties

I found my posts, well, to start, at least one, on the Cawley blog. Thank God. I am remembering now, too, I told him about having multiple email transmissions when we exchanged and he thought this was concerning and then didn't write after that. So it could have been he was concerned about his security and privacy as well.

I think I published a comment asking for confidentiality and then I posted anonymously, and later, after a while, I decided to give Cawley my email address and we corresponded just a little bit. Completely professional. Oh good, I'm finding others too. I'll repost them all here, because they give further insight into the development of my son and my diligence at researching and getting insight from other parents of gifted kids:

The first one I published without confidentiality was the one about left-handedness. I wrote the posts by the second "anonymous":

It IS a little odd--this left-handed thing. I think MOST of the men I've dated have been left-handed which is rather strange odds and I didn't LOOK for that either. Anyway, I was interested because I wrote about my son. It may have something to do with testosterone...(cough, cough, ahem!). We mothers of lefties may be a little...ummm...frustrated? outside of a relationship. I know on my MMPI one question was if I was satisfied with my sex life. It was put into the strata of questions with "concern" which a psychologist had to get more information about to rule out a potential problem. I said NO I wasn't satisfied, because the thing is, I wasn't HAVING any sex and wanted to! I was "waiting" for the right one. Almost allllll my fucking life. Waaaiiiiting. Okay, I'm in a better mood now that I've found my post:


"Giftedness and "palm-reading""
12 Comments - Show Original Post Collapse comments

Anonymous Anonymous said...

Ooh, that bit might be useful for figuring out testosterone / estrogen levels, also. Hmm...

- Kathy

5:17 AM
Blogger Valentine Cawley said...

Well, Kathy, it is a permanent record of the hormone history of the individual as it applied to their early days. It gives you a pretty good handle on their womb environment, for instance - and a good insight into their minds, too.

A helpful piece of research, I think.

Kind regards

3:33 PM
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Hello again,

Have you also read about hair whorls and handedness? I did some research about left-handedness because my son will suck only his left thumb and has done so since the womb (photos to prove it!). So far, my son is ambidextrous, but I read some research that indicated a counter-clockwise hair whorl is rare, but predominant in left-handed kids. I don't remember exactly, but it was something like if you have a clockwise hair whorl, you're 90% likely to be right-handed and if you've a counter-clockwise whorl, there is a 50/50 chance you're left-handed, and then almost ALL left-handed kids have a counterclockwise whorl. Sorry I don't know exact numbers, but it's online.

My son has a counterclockwise whorl. I looked at my son's hands and he has longer ring fingers than index fingers,and it is especially longer on his left hand. I wonder if boys automatically have this trait as opposed to girls? I think I read somewhere that they found women who were criminals had longer index fingers, therefore more testosterone, but it sounds like a study that could be easily gender-biased--making women who have non-traditional traits fearsome.

10:27 PM
Blogger Valentine Cawley said...

Hi.

No I haven't read anything about whorls - I will have to check it out.

I can comment though on your son's long ring finger. This is a sign of a high testosterone exposure in the womb. He is likely therefore to be good at mathematical and visuo-spatial tasks, but less so at verbal ones.

Furthermore it is NOT an automatic characteristic of males that they should show this long ring finger and short index finger. I have seen males with a "female" pattern - with almost the same length of index and ring finger. This indicates a reduced testosterone exposure in the womb and a relatively increased estrogen exposure. Such males will have good verbal skills - but are likely to be less good at maths. Their brains, therefore, are more "female" in type - but that does not have any bearing on sexual orientation as far as I am aware.

Good luck on raising your ambidextrous son.

11:09 PM
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Thanks for the comments and wishes. I found one of several links that describes the hair whorls and the link to handedness. http://www.americanscientist.org/template/AssetDetail/assetid/29757?&print=yes

I thought it was interesting in that lefties and righties have been found to have different characteristics/strengths. Wonder if there's a gene linking handedness to right or left brain dominance. From what I've read, most children are ambidextrous until about age 3.

I appreciate reading your blog.

1:46 PM
Blogger Valentine Cawley said...

Generally speaking, a left hander will be RIGHT BRAIN DOMINANT - and vice versa. So there is a direct link between handedness and brain dominance.

Thanks for the link. I will check it out.

I am glad to hear you enjoy my blog.

5:02 PM
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Another one of my posts, where I go by "mama":

"Tiarnan tests the temperature."
3 Comments - Show Original Post Collapse comments

Blogger Mama said...

Hello family,

When you say "outside of fist" do you mean with the fingers of his fist, knuckles, or back of the hand of the fist? It IS interesting, regardless, but I thought further clarification would give more of a picture/idea. My son is 14 months. He tests heat with the inside of his hand, at the base of the palm, just above the wrist, on the the pads. He'll say, "hot! hot!" and tap lightly with this part of his hand after he holds his hand above the object to feel the radiation of heat first (from food, for example, after I tell him it's hot).

6:59 AM
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Blogger Mama said...

Hello again,

I am checking back to say I've answered my own questions. I had thought it would be informative for everyone to hear what part of the back of the hand was used, and I didn't know how the heel of the hand is different from say, the fingers, but I looked it up on a Yale U. curriculum site that discussed sensitivity of the hand. It showed the fingers to be most receptive, with the heel of the hand about 1/2 as receptive and then the entire back of the hand as even less sensitive. I had thought, when I was asking you, that maybe the backs of the fingers are different from the knuckles, or the actual back of hand. So I was simply curious and then I found out it was a somewhat worthless question afterall. If there IS a difference between the back of the hand or the back of the fingers, it would be interesting to clarify, for just observational purposes. I certaintly do not intend or mean to monopologize the forums and have, all my life, asked many questions--annoying some in the process. Thank you though for your forbearance with my ignorance.

3:21 PM
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Blogger Valentine Cawley said...

I find your questions interesting and stimulating and not in the least bothersome as you suppose.

You raised an interesting matter - and answered it yourself.

However, just for information's sake, Tiarnan uses the part of the fist denoted by the back of his clenched fingers and knuckles: a pretty insensitive area.

Good luck on raising your gifted child.

Best wishes

8:42 PM
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Anonymous Anonymous said...

I think I'll just continue to send my responses as annonymous bc I always am concerned I'm hogging or clogging the msg. boards to you. I caught up on some posts and this was my favorite. Probably bc my son is close in age so I can see the entire thing so clearly. Sometime I'll have to send a photo of him--he looks a bit like your kids do...the wavy hair (I don't cut it either) and big eyes. He's half Mexican (from the father) but many think he's part Asian. Anyway, how sweet. And I didn't know that about mimosas! The first thing that came to my mind was Venus fly-trap. I don't think my son has ever waved goodbye to plants, but he is fascinated with them as well. And nature. He was really into fly's, and was excited they would come so close and even perch upon his finger, but I think he looks for my reaction and I wasn't cooing, "ooooh! look at that flllyy honeeey!"

1:28 PM
Blogger Valentine Cawley said...

It is funny how open young children are to experiences - such as your son and the fly. Later we learn to be less open however - which, in a way, is a pity.

There are a lot of interesting things in the natural world, if you know where to look.

A venus fly trap would be good to have a look at too...though it is rather threatening, unlike a mimosa.

Best wishes on raising your son!

1:50 PM
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Okay, I am the one who wrote the post about having a guinea pig and a parakeet. How embarrassing that I wrote it!

"Children and pet animals"
4 Comments - Show Original Post Collapse comments

Anonymous Anonymous said...

Have you considered reptiles? I fondly remember a pet lizard (Carolina Anole) I had as a child. He lived for seven years and became quite tame. He would sit on my finger and I could hold him up near a fly on the window and ZAP! he would nab it with his sticky tongue. He would also lick drops of honey or tiny bits of banana off a toothpick.

My family lived in an apartment, so a small pet that lived in a terrarium was ideal. These lizards may be too fragile for young children to handle, but I suppose that depends on the child. I was about eight years old when we first got him.

We also had a tortoise (much more rugged than a lizard) which we kept outside and fed dandelions.
We had a garter snake, too.

Reptiles are quiet, small and not as stinky as small mammals! Fish are nice, too (we have fish right now) but you can handle reptiles.

9:44 AM
Blogger Valentine Cawley said...

Reptiles? That sounds interesting. Like you say, they have the advantage that the kids can handle them. (Fish wouldn't like that much!)

Thank you for your suggestion. I will take my kids to a pet store and see whether they like the look of a lizard.

I appreciate your insight into what lizards are like to have around - and how to raise one. That helps.

Best wishes

10:40 AM
Anonymous Anonymous said...

A lizard IS a good idea! When I was young, I had a guinea pig that I loved, and later I had a parakeet. I can't remember how it was with the guinea pig but that he ran around the house and could be held too, but the parakeet was very tame and ate out of my hand. He would give kisses too and liked to ride around with me wherever I went. They're not smelly, but they are a little messier because you have to change the papers (bird seed gets around). When I had my parents babysit him for a week while I was on vacation, he died. Birds can die of a broken heart--they won't eat and get anxious. Parakeets seem to be pretty smart, but are smaller than a parrot and don't need as much room. The other thing, if you get one--like any bird, they may fly into a window or mirror and hurt their wings. Some people clip the wings so they can't fly around as much, but I couldn't bear to have that done. At some point, the bird flew into something and injured one wing and couldn't fly straight and would hit other objects too. Really, more than anything, though, the parakeet wanted to be around me. If you get one, they'll be attached to you,if you get two, they'll be attached to their partner. I was attached enough to my parakeet to sew him a christmas stocking and feel depressed when he died.

12:35 AM
Blogger anon said...

Heya again,

I'm an animal lover myself and grew up with a number of dogs and cats over the years.

Upon moving to Singapore and into 'apartment-life' though, I've had to satisfy myself with smaller pets. Fortunately, I have found equal, if not more, joy in rearing hamsters.

If you go down this insanely obsessive route, I recommend dwarf hamsters, as I've found from personal experience that they are the more odourless of the species. Other hamster enthusiasts might disagree of course.

All the best!
Joanne :-)

4:36 AM
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I found a couple of others, but I think the one I wanted was the one I marked "confidential" and it had a huge list of things my son was doing and his interests at about 14 months of age.

My son was still speaking at 14 months. It disappeared sometime after that. He showed every sign of being extremely gifted, and although this was noted early-on,it was also later confirmed by others. The doctor who was MY PCP who broke off my speech to interrupt and comment, "Do you realize, your son is HIGHLY intelligent?" was one to notice later. I hadn't said a thing about him, she was just observing his actions and words.

But no one in Wenatchee believed me or listened to me. And when his speech went to gibberish, they still didn't listen to me.