Wednesday, December 24, 2008

2nd Broken Promise (Feb. 26, 2008)

I already posted the promise my mother made to get the radiation testing done. She said they'd pay for it since it meant so much to me. Now, here is an email where she promises my father and her have only promised me they'll pay for an independent mental health evaluation. After this, they promise to pay for a private attorney if I agree to the "conditions". I did, and afterward, they backed out on EVERYTHING. Broke promise for diagnostics, for independent mental health eval, and for private attorney. And then claimed they never made any promises:

RE: still trying...‏
From: cam huegenot (cameocares@live.com)
Sent: Tue 2/26/08 10:48 AM
To: dicksiedael@aol.com


I'm talking to a private lawyer right now who may be good. He's got 37 years of experience, and his secretary is WONDERFUL and chatty and caring, and she says he's taken very challenging cases in the past and is excellent.

She wants us to send a photo/photos of Oliver to him at his email address. I'm going to send him a timeline of events too, but she said she absolutely thinks change of venue is essential in my case and validated that court appointed attorneys have far too much on their plate to do anyone any good.

Please send some photos of Oliver to:

beatylaw@yahoo.com.

I'll have the independent mental health evaluation after I have a private attorney. I'll even do one all for CPS, in addition. I will cooperate when I have private represention, but without it, I don't feel any of this other stuff is in his best interest.

Thank you,

Cameo

________________________________
> To: cameocares@live.com
> Subject: Re: still trying...
> Date: Tue, 26 Feb 2008 11:05:42 -0500
> From: dicksiedael@aol.com
>
> Okay, Cameo, here's how it is:
> We did NOT "promise" you anything other than independant eval and bus ticket. We said we might be willing to do the radiation testing, and indicated "maybe" helping some with attorney...but specifically said no promise or guarantee on that. We've made several calls, looked up info, talked to people and prayed about your situation and what is BEST to do. Not cheapest, Best. I talked with the attorney because I was willing to see what he had to say and to "consider" helping in that way, but I've always made it plain that there was no guarantee. After talking with SEVERAL people lately, they suggested waiting even on the eval. to #1 make sure it's what the state wants and #2 see if the state is still doing one and if so, it might come out good and WHY spend for the independant one if another is acceptable? Just because we are 'willing' to spend approx. $2,000 for that doesn't mean we WANT to or NEED to. If we thought it wAS
> necessary" we were willing to. We are just trying to be prudent. And we have been writing you to support you, but listen to this honest fact: "Support" does not mean always patting you on the back and telling you what you want to hear. Support and love can be telling you what you need to hear or need to do in your best interests and those of Oliver. I know I've told you some things about yourself that sound harsh, but it's not to just make you feel down or hopelless, it is in HOPES that you will SEE that you NEED to make CHANGES in your attitude and/or actions.
>
> However, this note just shows big time that your attitude is NOT changing. You demand by telling us what you want and what you 'expect'. You threaten by saying you'll cut off familly ties, 'ruin' (or attempt to, that is) family members, remove Oliver from good care.
> You are hostile, ungrateful, mouthy. THIS, Cameo, is WHY you are having most of your problems. You've treated doctors that way. You've treated family that way. Youve treated CPS that way. You treat everyone nicely UNTIL you do not get "your" way, then all
> "hell breaks loose". Many times they don't even have to be 'doing' anything....just disagree with you.
>
> I do want to call your attention to fact that we said WE thought it was "unreasonable" for CPS to expect you to just jump at less than two hours notice to get to Bellingham and on bus. We are seeing BOTH sides and trying to give you advice. However, your insistence on 'computer access" is petty in relation to the overall situation here with your son separated from you for two weeks. They can see that, anyone can...I would think even you could. Dont challenge EVERYTHING. You honestly have no good reason to request this Maria be removed. So what if she's rude? So what if she's catholic? They don't care, for sure, if she's catholic, and it is NOT a compelling conflict, especially in their minds. And rude? When you treat people the way you do, MOST folks are rude, are they not? And she IS their 'employee'. You would have to have proven (or nearly so) compelling reasons to even request her being removed..l....and if you tried to 'demand' it, then I'm not surprised they ignore you; nobody likes to be bulllied and unfortunately for you, they don't HAVE to be; they are presently in control.
>
> As to your threats. Your attitude makes it ever so plain that you are NOT putting Oliver first in consideration. You threaten again to rip him from Holly's where YOU have ADMITTED he is getting EXCELLENT care and that they are good to him. Why? Vengence or being mad or 'showing us'. NOT what's best for Oliver. Bring out the "skeletons", Cameo. Bring out all the filth and crud and trash and horrors of the Bairds and Garretts. Do what you have to do. You have blinders on. I hope that someday they fall off. I hope if they do, it won't be too late.
>
> Your concern at this time should be to get back with Oliver. You think you're going to win all these battles...and you make it all a battle. How many of these battles over the past 5 yrs have you actually WON? You need to humble yourself. Dad says if he could humble himself and work at Burger King for over a year to do what was best for his family, so can you. They treated him badly. There were customers and folks in town that ridiculed him for 'working at burger king'. Prior to that, he was completely and unjustly fired from Belmonts where he'd done above and beyond his best for years. Thats WHY he was at burger king...after nearly a year of NO work available. It was slander, too, that could have ruined his name around town. The church turned on him, believing them and even saying worse. But we never treated them badly. We left, disassociated ourselves. But didn't sue, didn't even treat them with disrespect, just sort of tired to keep our distance when possible...not always possible in small town. Matt. 23:12 Whoever humbles himself will be exalted. Prov. 11:2 but with humillit comes wisdom and Pov. 15:33 and humility comes before honor. I Peter 5:5 clothe yourself with humility. Prov. 16:18 Pride goes before destruction; a haughty spirit before a fall.
> prov. 15:1 A gentle answer turns away wrath, but a harsh word stirs up anger. Pov. 15:5 "but whoevr herds correction shows prudence. Prov.19:19 He who loves a quarrel loves sin. Prov. 18:2 A fool finds no pleasure in understanding but delights in airing his own opinions. and further in chapter: A fools lips bring him strife and his mouth invites a beating. A fool's mouth is his undoing and his lips are a snare to his soul. Before his downfall a man's heart is proud, but humility comes before honer. He who answers before listening, that is his folly and his shame. Those are all bible verses, just a few of many, dealing with the tongue and with humility and pride. The issue isn't whether you are right or wrong, but how you respond.
>
> I'm sorry you feel as you do. I'm sorry you can't see. We do love you. IN spite of the your threats. We just want to see you helped, and yes... we have said you do need help, but not just money, you need help to make changes. WE do not ENJOY telling you that you need help or need to change. Don't want to have to telll you anything bad, but we tell you the truth. I am truly sorry ....I do think our actions in this whole thing have sent you mixed messages. We say we wont help, then talk to the attorney, etc. What we have said all along, though, is that there were no promises. I've checked into things and talked with your attorney because I want to be open minded to doing whats best for you. You don't have to agree with our decisions, but sure wish you wouldn't always think the worst. I want what's best for you and I want what's best for Oliver. period. We would not let the 'money' stand in the way if we thought it were THE answer to doing what is long term BEST for both YOU and HIM. Throwing money at something will always spend money. It willl not always solve the problem. I want the problem solved. I do want you to get 'help'...whatever that may be. I want Oliver back with his mother...but not a mother who is at war with the world, but a mother who is stable and happy and enjoying her son that God gave her.
> A mother who can have good relationships with others. A mother who can provide a good home for her child. You can do those things, but I think you do need help to do them. I have prayed and prayed for both of you. Things have seemingly only gotten worse. I have to believe this is part of answered prayer. NOT that I think God wants your son taken. BUT I think maybe he wants to help you to see that you need help and need change and need Him. But you have a will, and if you do not humble yourself but instead continue your wars, you may well end up losing. That is not our fault. It is not God's fault. It is your choice.

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