Friday, July 24, 2009

Visited Old Friends, Miss Nacho, & Peace for Racism

I visited an old friend today, went to see some people I used to know, and only one of them was there. There was a new guy but I thought he was one of the old cabin guys at first, I didn't even recognize him.

It brought back old memories and I remembered how Nacho was always there, goofing off, and hanging out being a mediator and negotiator with everybody. I don't even remember Nacho's last name, or his real first name, but I felt sad.

The old group was all hispanic and they used to cook for me and have me visit and it was like an old family.

I met Nacho's son and was hoping he might be there, but he's not. I guess the rest of the guys are going up later or something. But I don't know if Nacho Jr. will stay in Oregon or what.

It was sort of fun to talk to the one guy and he looks the same pretty much and said a lot of changes have happened in his life. I guess his wife doesn't have stomach cancer anymore because she was dying the last time I talked to him. I really missed seeing Nacho though.

Nacho had this personality that told you he meant business, but he was a giant teddy bear. I don't think anyone disliked him. But then he got killed and I don't know if it was a hit or what but I think so. He used to visit me all the time and visit with my son and it's just weird that he's not around anymore. I think he's the first person who I've known who has died, except my grandfather. Oh, and my schoolbus acquaintance who commited suicide at the age of 13.

I think it was Nacho, but I can't remember, who brough money to me when I was in jail for something I didn't do. He went out of his way to help people and he did it out of kindness and nothing more. His girlfriend wondered if we were romantic but we weren't.

Then this new guy was really nice too. He gave me a ride back to Wenatchee and listened to me and I found out he's been here awhile in Wenatchee. He said he has a daughter and son in Mexico. He was sort of funny, good sense of humor, and I got to practice my Spanish again. I got to practice my pronunciation on a Spanish Bible too. Lol. Seriously, I was asked to read from the book of Revelations, the last 2 or three chapters. I think it was chapters. I didn't know what I was reading but I was able to demonstrate my Spanish. The only part I knew was the end part about "ven!" and what that meant. It was hilarious, not the reading, but then my friend was trying to speak in English and said he and his wife were brothers. He kept saying this and I repeated in Spanish and he agreed but I don't think he knew what I was saying.

I talked to the new guy about getting my son back and said I didn't know why he was taken really, other than politics. The guy said he thought I just needed to be working and that it was more financial than anything else. I don't know, maybe he's right.

I've been looking, and submitted more applications yesterday and then today I tried to go to a couple new places and some people gave me ideas on where I could apply next. So I will try.

If it's just financial, I don't know what the hold up is. If the state is willing to work with me as I get that piece together, I'd just like more visitation.

Yesterday and this morning I was really upset but then I got a bus pass. I was trying to go to Stemilt but we passed the stop when I was talking and the driver said it would take an hour to get back that way so I just decided to go to Cashmere. I was going to visit Granny if I had time after seeing the guys, but she was going to an appointment.

What is weird is that the one time marijuana was found in my blood, at the hospital, the only time of my life, I didn't even use it and had never tried it. The only people I was around was my family and the guys and I know they wouldn't put something in my food, unless maybe it was someone who really didn't like me. I was living with the guys at the time, but everyone seemed to get along.

I have always thought it got mixed up at the hospital or someone at the hospital did something with my lab results or just lied. It was so weird, because it was right after I reported the FBI guys and then moved to Wenatchee and I guess they did undercover drug type of work. I thought about this and all the problems that have happened since then.

I would have never used any drugs at this time in my life, and only after my son was taken did I even try pot, for the first time, to see if it helped with migraine and it did. I never even had a chance to go back and see if I could test against things that set off a false positive because I didn't know about it until 3 months later.

I went to ER at that time because of a suicide attempt which was a one-time thing and I was freaking out about it later, because I read that alcohol and pot don't mix and cause odd reactions and if I was on it, I didn't know who would do that to me. I would have a couple of beers every now and then but that was it. I read the combo makes people wig out and wondered if my attempt was triggered by that more than anything, if it was really in my system and I didn't know.

It was a really strange time back then. I wasn't an alcoholic though! I was smashing everyone's beer bottles on the porch and Nacho would stick up for me. I only smashed the beer bottles of the guys who were total drunks or alcholics and I did it on a cement pavement out of the way of others so no one would get hurt and then I cleaned it up. I don't think I ever saw Nacho drunk except a couple times.

I did a good deed the other day. I asked a friend to delete a racist comment off of his cell phone display. It really, really, bothered me and I said if your stuff is getting vandalized, this could be why. If anyone saw it, they would freak out. He said it was more un-P.C. than anything but I just thought, no, this is racist and not okay. So I made a step torwards Obama's admonition for racist thinking clean-up.

It's not such a good deed when you then talk about it, but I was proud of myself for saying something when no one of that color was around and it was just us and I told him how much it bothered me and was really racist. I don't know if he even thought of it that way or not, but I don't know how you couldn't. And! he changed it! He took out the racial slur and it made me feel good.

No comments: