Oy, Triangles, and "5"

I feel like I'm in the middle of a Jewish renaissance, except some of them want me to think they're "christian" when they're doing dirty deeds, and a few others are just screwing around with me.

The latest theme in town has been some kind of Gary Goldsmith revival, with my son saying "Oy" every other word, and I come home today to find plywood cut out into triangles and standing on the floor, and then it's '5' this and '5' that, and Count The Dracula says the lucky number of the last 2 weeks has been '5'.

So who the hell is '5' or is it just the number of men that's tried to screw me over? five this, five that, and I started wondering what all the 5 stuff is about and then the only thing I can think of is maybe that it's considered to be the most holy number for jews? Before I ever even mentioned Gary in my blog, and briefly at that, i think, I had a few guys coming up to me and I was finding out people were trying to tell others to use '5' for things.

I might be very wrong about where the number 5 is coming from. I really don't know. But for specific examples...I don't know. this is just getting weird. There are some who are so supportive and they're jewish and they're so wonderful in general or i've seen when they think it's unnoticed, this weird concern.

It's almost like, they feel sorry for me but some of them think even if they feel sorry for me and believe I'm innocent, I need to be screwed over anyway. Or, they go along with what's happening with my son. I think some really hate me but I am not sure why other than old stuff which i thought was under the bridge a long time ago.

then it's "star wars" this and that again, and these women who I knew were Jewish today, pretended to be christian in front of me, loudly, and I don't know why. Not only that, I don't know, what else.

I stood up for Israel in a meeting where it was mainly in favor of the Palestines, because i tried to be fair and balanced, either way. When no one was saying anything in favor of israel, i tried to put out some questions which were more balanced and fair. Not one other person had anything positive to say or add, to the topic on israel, or trying to see it from another perspective. But i know not everyone in any group, agrees with what some of the rest are doing. Maybe there are a few who really actually care about me. I don't know. But some very strange things have been done. I just don't understand.

I just end up having some hate me no matter what I do.

With '5', it's been about "five meat sandwich" said so loudly in my presence, I can't but help hear. then the other day at Walgreen's it was about '5 meat pizza' and this woman talking so loudly, coming right next to me to go on and on about the 5 meat sandwich. Then this woman who is talking to the other woman about the 5 meat sandwich, says something about how maybe I could use some foundation "primer" and she selects this bottle of foundation primer that is named "fix and perfect" and as she's saying this, some guy who had dark brown hair and was tall and was jewish, came into the store and exchanged smirks. It was sort of on and on inuendoes and I didn't know what half of it was implying so i just said, to the clerk, I told her she was probably qualified to do this kind of work anywhere and she said she hadn't been out of the town and I tried to encourage her to get out and try something new and expand her horizons. She told me she got 'benefits' in Wenatchee and didn't know if she could get these kinds of benefits anywhere else. I just tried to be nice in return.

I need to find Will.

I don't know, half the time, who is deliberately trying to stir up trouble or put blame on some other group or make me think something so i am hurt or offended and then end up offending a larger group. In general, I have not ever thought this is where most of my problems were coming from. i just haven't. but sometimes I wonder what is going on. I guess the more I offend some other group, or unintentionally think someone is trying to screw me or my over, the better it is for those who really are trying to do harm and would rather have a lot of people share in the blame.