Wednesday, March 16, 2011

Today (impressions...psychic or no?)

I tried to find medieval sacred music (instrumental) and couldn't find it on Pandora with my search so i ended up choosing harp music when i saw a harp option.

i am going to have to write without capitalization right now because the library computer i'm at has a problem with the caps key.

the first song is concerto for flute, harp, and orchestra and is by mozart and features stephan turnovsky. it sounds like water music to me. like petals from budding trees listing to a pond in the spring.

i had an odd impression the other day...yesterday. it was really odd and i thought it is probably some kind of crossed wire idea. but i briefly wondered about a woman and all of a sudden, i saw a speculum. like she went through a lot of exams for gynocological stuff or would be going through this. i didn't ask for the impression, it just came to my mind without trying to think of it. i got the impression at about 3:20 p.m. yesterday or a little earlier. i wrote it down i think, and would have to look at it. it was british royalty connected but this is why i wonder if i somehow got a misimpression. i don't really know how it came up or what my thought was exactly but it was something like 'i wonder if she has health problems at all' or something like that, it was vague and then i saw and could sense the spec and i had the impression that it wasn't just like an annual exam but something that was either occuring in that time and moment so it was very vivid, or in that day or close, or something that happened a lot in connection with some kind of process or problem. I sensed first some idea of pain of some kind and then there was a visible speculum. but i didn't see any parts of a person or anything. so then, i saw things as facts and then my own assumption was there was some kind of exam or exams for a reason. that part is my assumption.
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read the news today, about U.S. people buying iodine and some going for kelp. i had thought about kelp myself yesterday, that it's so high in iodine, it might be a good natural solution for anyone who is worried. i wonder if anyone has any estimation of what the possibilities are, if there was a full leak. does anyone in the u.s. who works with nukes have any idea about this? and then seeing all of the trash in japan from the quake is hard to grasp. i think it's so big it's hard to understand. i liked the story about how the store owner in japan was passing out supplies after. it was a couple days ago. i just read the article from the emperor's speech. i was wearing grey today until i changed thinking i had to go to work maybe earlier today but i don't have to work until afternoon.

if i could help out i would but all i can do here is work on my legal situation and maintain work. i don't have enough money to help as i'd want to and have some who don't want me to have money either. ironically, the verse i picked up today sounded like a fortune cookie and not a scripture: "you will be rich. you will give to others generously." this is how it went and i don't know what version of the bible someone was using. i put it in my bag but would have to look again. i unrolled it and thought it sounded like a fortune cookie thing and not a verse.
but i think it was from corinthians? exhorting people and encouraging them.
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i can't find any estimates of what could happen with radioactive spill to the west coast but i looked and it says the jet stream and direction of the wind would mean radioactive waste would hit west coast within a 36 hour period. i guess that's why people are buying iodine or wondering over there. here in tennessee no one is really going out to buy stuff i don't think.

i can't say i had any premonition of this quake. i did think about earthquakes in general the night before, and was upset about something, but i didn't think or wish anything to happen anywhere.
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I am on another computer now, with caps. It's several hours from when I made this post and is now about 3:04 p.m. and I'm getting ready before work.

I've gone back to the 80s music on Pandora. I really love the song "Maniac" by Michael Sembello.

I ran across someone today that reminds me of someone else a little. And what's strange is that when I asked what heritage or ethnicity, he said a few things but one thing that stood out was Danish because I once imagined this other guy sounded like prodigy of another Denmark man--the sense of humor and shock factor. They have a similar pencil style. Then, on a different day some guy sat next to me and it was like he'd been wearing a shirt with this other guys DNA specific B.O. on it. It was distinct B.O. This other guy, who is here today, I turned and knew eyes on me. Then, I was at the computer, back to him and I sensed something had changed. I sat there and didn't turn around and thought, "He left." So then I looked and he had left his seat but his things were still there at the table. Then we talked for a few minutes and asked eachother the same question at the exact same time. "How old are you?" same intonation and speed and everything.

Anyway, I'm trying to figure out some new things to help volunteer with and help write a grant for. Someone gave me an idea about a group that needs a grant writer for people who are artists that have been released from jail. Which is something I really like the idea of because I love art and understand it in some ways, or artists, and I like the idea of creating new opportunities. I was slightly worried about writing for "released convicts" while I have this situation with my son, but then I remembered what the scripture says too, to not neglect the prisoners. My only hesitation was, "How will anyone look at even writing a grant for released convicts if I have a child?" but the thing is this, I am not trying to get my son back because there was something wrong with me to begin with, or with my judgement. While I am single or without my son in my care, I may have taken risks to get back to him that I'd have never taken if he had always been with me. But I have good judgment.

I don't know if I'll be able to get a trade on a night to attend this one meeting I've been invited to, but if not I hope to find a different day to meet and discuss ideas and grant needs.

There was another meeting that I had wanted to attend but I had some other pressing matters to attend to, and I can always go back and address the other thing.

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