Thursday, April 5, 2012

Art I Liked & Charlotte's Babies & Obama's Answer

Last month, I looked at art and some things I liked were the lace on the sleeve of the girl, 'la nina' from frida khalo. In black and white, not color. The photograph of the painting in black and white brings out the contrast of the lace and, I think, makes it more striking and delicate. I really liked the way the lace is done, over everything else in the painting, that is what I liked best.

Her other ideas I was able to find in classical art. I saw her painting of herself in the bed with twines growing around it as a counterpoint, in a way, to a painting of a madonna and child, "workshop of the giotto/the epiphany". I think the idea is that her own epiphanies and inspirations for art, came to frida while she was on her sick-deathbed as opposed to creation (of a child and discovery by others...epiphanies) portrayed in the mother and child (jesus and mary).

I think Frida was exceptionally beautiful and smart, and like her art better than diego's. I enjoy the magical surrealism and symbolic play as well as her use of color and design, and the mirth of some of it. I can't look at all of it very long though, bc some of it is too disturbing for my taste.

At the time I looked at it, through a novel called "frida khalo" which had photos of some of her art, the one holding my attention was the black and white of the lace on the sleeve.

Almost transparent but tangible and such a feeling of lace laid against warm skin. I thought she really captured the identity of lace. Or, of that piece of lace and what it's purpose was for. Because all lace is not alike. I think the lace on the sleeve was almost some kind of crocheted lace, not sure, but just thought it was a nice feature to the painting and for me, surpassed all other features.

So I stared and stared at this.

I looked at this sometime after spending an hour or less observing baby spiders. I was at the stove one night and this baby spider dropped down by its thread and hung there, suspended midway. Then, I saw another and the one appeared to be waiting for the other.

I decided to watch the baby spiders so I left all I was doing to see where they went. The first one made a tightwire from the right to the left, in front of me. Then once on the ledge, the first one waited. I watched and I do believe they were communicating because it was like the first was calling out to the other, "Come on! don't be afraid!" The first one had landed on that ledge, right next to my mother's Paul Revere RiverWare saucepan that I had hanging on the wall turned over. She's had Paul Revere and that pan since I was a kid. So the one was waiting there and then the other one took off, on the same line. And then they were both there, right on that edge (the edge of two walls coming together). Then I watched and the first led again and threw out a line to the purple curtain I had hanging in drapes and folds from my ceiling.

It's a velvet sort of purple-maroon blanket I decided to tie up from the ceiling as a partition between rooms to keep it warmer.

So the one was then on the folds of the blanket. At the time I watched, it seemed so personable and sort of magical. These spiders didn't speak but I felt they communicated still and noticed they were not independent of eachother at all. They waited for eachother.

So the other one stayed by the Paul Revere pan and wouldn't follow. Next, a third came along...a third baby spider and it went over to the pan where the 2nd one was. The second one went over, across the line, after much more deliberation. The first one was impetuous and the other one really stayed back for awhile. But then it went after the other one up into the folds of the purple curtain. I lost sight of the first one, because it kept climbing to the top, where I had it tied. I looked and looked and didn't see it. So I got my candle that was then burning and took it up to see if was there and held it up torwards the ceiling by the curtain. The second was there, having joined the other after about a half hour.

Then I went to the bathroom, having to go, and when I walked in, facing me in the mirror was that spider. One of the baby ones was sitting on top of my head. I guess when I walked past the curtain, one of them jumped or landed, or who knows what, right onto my hair. I stared at the spider and the spider stared at me. Through the mirror. And I then brushed it off of my hair.

I brushed it off and that was that I thought. Then I opened my hand, which was in a fist. The spider was inside of my hand. I have no idea how that spider, which was on my hair, then ended up in the palm of my hand when I opened it. It was right in the center, and I felt, just staring at me again. How in the world this spider managed to get into my closed hand I have no idea.

So then I decided to put it back on the curtain. I think that's how it happened, or possibly I was trying to put it on the curtain and it landed inside of my hand instead. I think maybe that was the case, and it makes more sense. Anyway, I don't know if it was the 1st or 2nd baby.

So there was this 3rd one sitting there on the edge, and it stayed by the pan so long I cut the line. I mean, there was a spider web line from there to the curtain and I had things to do and an hour had passed so if it wanted to go to the curtain it could still cast it's line, but I broke it and thought, "Who knows, maybe that one is going to be staying on the other side". And then I was about to wash dishes and a fourth one was just starting to descend so I thought "I thought there were only 3" (bc that's all there was at first) but I saw 4 that night.

I thought, an egg must have hatched and it's all of Charlotte's babies. It was just like watching rapelling. It made me think of rappeling, you know, mountain climbing with ropes, in a terrain, and it made me think of spiderman, and of Charlotte's web.

I guess if someone called my son and others their own "babies" after taking them out to cast lines around without me, I might feel a little offended too. Which is why I stated I didn't like her, when I was in D.C. and I still don't think she was up to good business.

That nanny Tiggy. Men don't get it. Might not catch the drift. Women do. And I never thought about that comment in this context until tonight, it dawned on me, after I wrote the title. On the night I watched the spiders, I never thought of it, just of how connected they were and how it was fun to watch and so like rappeling.

It was a very interesting night. It felt very...I don't know how to describe it. But anyway.

I just looked over at the shelf thing above the stove to see if it has a brand or name on it and it does. It's called "Ventline".

It's the Ventline, which is above the stove and then the Paul Revere Riverware copper plated pan they waited by, near the edge and the edge is next to the refrigerator and freezer (freezer is called "NORCOLD" in white letters with a blue snowflake on black panel and then I had tied up the curtain from norcold freezer, to the vent or opening in the ceiling to fall down in folds as a partition between my livingroom and kitchen.

As for my own baby, I want my baby back.

I wrote a line to my son, even though he never gets anything I send him, telling him I'd watched some spiders the other day and they seemed to be saying to eachother, "Wait for me!"

From a nature perspective, one would think spiders just take off on their own and don't need eachother or aren't communal or social but I saw it the other way, because they seemed to be communicating still and following eachother. It was as surprising to me as my discovery that our fish, the goldfish, was happy and felt happy emotions upon seeing me, and wasn't only motivated by food but by a social tendency. To think fish have feelings is as surprising as the idea that spiders are social. Socialists? just kidding.

I wrote Charlotte's babies thinking of the movie and spiders and then my aunt charlotte, but then I realized while writing, this is what the inuendo was about to Diana and how she took it, and why she was upset. Aha!

Look at the date. I haven't checked but perhaps you could. Did Tiggy make this comment before taking William and Harry rappeling or after?

See, people can be very, very mean and disguise it and from what I hear, the british can be cold, taking it to art-form if they want to be. So one british socialite to another is not going to be obvious and yet they will know exactly how their comments will affect the emotions and fears of another.

Imagine. I don't think Camilla ever made Diana feel she was taking her kids (but I don't know for sure), just her man. Then Tiggy is taking her kids. So her man is with one woman and then a nanny taking her kids? that's too much.

That is: "Stay out of my son's bathtime and private affairs"

I can't remember what it was, but aside of feeling pushed aside (and mocked) by Tiggy, I think there was something about intrusion into certain times or spaces with her sons that Diana was completely against and Tiggy disrespected. I thought I had read it was bathtime but I am not positive. I haven't looked anything up for several years actually.

Too much torture since offending Tiggy's followers at The Post Pub. I found something. It's not the best, but the idea...and mentions orders. It doesn't mention the "my babies" comments by tiggy, but I'd check on the date, to see if it's after she took them rappeling, as if she is Charlotte, the mother spider and she took her baby spiders rappeling with her. It sounds strange, but women can be catty. We all know.'+bathrooms%3B+KEEP+THIS+'SERVANT'+IN...-a061309895

The only reason I mention it, is because whenever someone brings up some ghastly sounding reaction, or some irrational or crazy sounding behavior, sometimes it sounds paranoid or like over-reacting, until you find out the context of the provocation.

Which was worse? "my babies?" or "sorry about the baby"? Probably, tiggy should have been fired for "my babies" and there never would have been a need to retort with "sorry about the baby".

I see it from a mother's side and a nanny's side. I think the nanny upset the mother and that the mother and mistress made some really class-ridiculous comments about the nanny. The one about bacon and eggs is hilarious, by Camilla. "Sure. She can make bacon and eggs in the morning, but she's not the kind of woman you marry."

That made me laugh out loud.

(Rescue Aid Society: The Rescuers)
I haven't seen clips from the Rescuers since I was a kid but looked them up tonight before making this post and then thought to look up this particular song at this time. It made me laugh bc the guy with the drum in the beginning, hit it and it makes this big POP sound just like I made last night. I had my jelly belly & aleve shaker in my left hand in a bottle that says "All Day Relief" and then I had taken the bag of popcorn from the microwave and instead of opening it, I didn't want to let go of the shaker in my left hand, which I was keeping time to, so I did a little drum move and WHACKED the bag. Right in the center. I had set it on the table and just POW and it made a sound exactly like that first drum from one of the four mice in the band. A few pieces of popcorn flew out (3). Then I looked at the bottle I was shaking and noticing my hand covered all words except "relief" and I thought about legal relief and my son. I did it as part of a drumming idea but then seeing this clip it's sort of funny in a different kind of match.

Who has sweaty hands now? and why? I just had some random impression of a man feeling anxious or thinking quickly all of a sudden and with sweaty hands. But I don't know who or why--it is just a vague impression. Sitting to standing and then sweaty hands.

Hmm...looking at the video again. King size upside down and the pap on the other side. Pop? or pap? It's a cute movie. I got tears in my eyes with Someone's Waiting For Me, thinking about my son.

Anyway, try it. Pop a bag of popcorn and then whack it with one open-face hand like hitting a bongo hard and it makes the same sound as the mouse with the drum.

I was going to list other art and paintings I noticed and glass I liked, but some other time. I think the lace and the spiders are enough for now.

On Obama, from the U.S. side, I didn't read the whole book. I will try some other time. I opened to that one part about being moderate and felt discouraged because we are really being tortured.

And then the next time I opened randomly, I opened to a section about Issac and Abraham. Which was also interesting bc I have wanted him to appeal for my son's rights. I opened right to the page immediately about Isaac and Abraham. He writes that when Abraham was told to sacrifice his own son, he was led by God in a spiritual sense, as a test of faith. But if others, looking in from the outside just saw with earthly eyes, they would call CPS or assume something was wrong, rightly. So how God may direct something and want something to happen or will be the one involved and yet others cannot be expected to understand or share in this spiritual revelation.

This was good for me to read at the time I read it, because it directly answered a question I had for God and to others and something that had been on my mind. And it was answered by the President, on the very thing.

And that question for me was, why does God sometimes show me things (not like others who are seers and prophets, but just now and then intuitive things) and it seems to have importance and I know it's from God and yet no one listens? Or why, if God really DID have a message from me to Obama, about how I should have my son, and even gave me a sign I asked for, in seeing his femur when I'm not talented in that way...why would God show me this if it's for nothing? How can I prove to others what things God shows me are really from him and not my delusion or imagination? and why would God show me at all if it makes no difference?

And then I opened right to this section. About how God may show a thing to someone and it's a revelation, an order, or even a miracle, but you can't expect others to be part of that spiritual revelation and to be on the same page.

So I got my answer from Obama on the very thing I was wondering about, through a book he wrote years earlier. And how strange that it is now such an answer after I got something from God to give to him directly and he already decided how he would respond.

I never looked like I was killing my son--I was trying to protect my son. But the point is about when God gives someone a message or revelation and then coming to terms with how others will see this or interpret it.

I hope something will change in a positive direction for me and my son. There has been a lot of crime involved in our separation and torture.

Hmm. back to Tiggy. I checked and the 160 ft/50 meter abseiling down a dam without safety lines event was allegedly in 1998 (according to wiki) which means they had most likely been abseiling with Tiggy prior to that time, and not on a large scale. So the comment most likely still refers to this idea, in my opinion. Others would know better than I. I would check on it though.

I will tell you one thing--she has a real smash 'em crew, Tiggy. I said one word against her and was tortured like never before.

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