I had some weird dream last night but I only remember the end of it.
It was me and my Mom in a large room and I got a call from "Gary". It was his wife and then he got on the phone. She was calling to say she wanted me to be their surrogate and how quickly and I said, just let me know and I need approximate details on provisions and arrangments, for rent, travel and medical. They were calling from the East Coast. So she was going on and on and then Gary, her husband, got on the phone and started talking, and then it went back to her.
While I was talking to her, my Mom got off of the couch, and started stirring a pot, cabbage-patch dance style, but making wide stirs and kept saying, "Crack open the strawberries", "crack the strawberries", "crack the strawberries". I wondered why my Mom was doing this and then I realized, she was hoping they heard her, and she was letting me know she thought they were playing a game and wanted to ruffle their feathers, unnerve them. She did this for a long time, saying this loudly, and then I got off the phone and realized they were FBI (in the dream). My Mom sat back down on the couch next to me. Then, in the dream or when I woke, I realized it referred to rapes against me.
When I woke up, I thought about "crack open the strawberries". I had thrown out a small strawberry jam, without opening it, into the garbage yesterday. Then I had to open up containers I had labled "borscht stock" because the military shut off my fridge and freezer to spoil all of my food. They have my entire place "rigged" and do all kinds of things here. I can't imagine what sort of "fun" it was for my parents to take their RV vacation to Arizona a couple of years ago. Thrills, I'm sure. I mostly thought about the strawberry jam when I woke up, and how it was sealed, and when Gary and this woman were calling me from the East Coast my Mom was implying they were both FBI and had part in organizing my rape.
Afterall, the last thing I wrote about last night, was the international bet made to have someone rape me.
I got up and went to the house and my Mom was finishing some things up and then got a call and I played with the dog. Then I left and came back and she was on the phone with a different woman whose name was "Jeannie" and had the same kind of East Coast accent as the woman in my dream. A little different but not much.
I guess she's called before, like in my dream, the woman I was talking to had called me before. She was calling for an appraisal and then said, deliberately, "Holy Shit" twice. My Mom basically was trying not to cry and had been trying not to cry when Jeannie called in the first place. I started braiding my hair as they talked, and Lorraine Rose came to mind. I noticed my Mom's one eye on the left corner is really ruined from torture and totally different from the other eye.
I said, as my Mom was telling "Jeannie" she had to go, "Have you cracked open the strawberries yet?" so Jeannie could hear.
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