Wednesday, January 16, 2013

(photo) Pixies & Ludwig van Beethoven - Piano Sonata No. 24 in F sharp major, Op. 78

(I woke up because of torture this morning and it's being applied all day. From early morning and still now at noon. It is the same technology I've already described by NASA as applied to me, my Mom, Dad, and my son, which when it's used, causes pain on that side of the brain and causes the eye on that side to bulge out. My eye is doing this, because of torture and it's been for hours with only about a 30 minute break)

This is the first thing I'm listening to this morning. I like it. I heard the first notes and it caught my attention.

It was written for the Countess Terese and, according to wiki writers for this song, is supposed to be one of Beethoven's favorite piano sonatas.

Yahno Connor. Janner Connor? is the pianist. I didn't read it, just now it was announced at 7:28 a.m.

Nice playing.

I listened to The Pixies all night last night. The same songs over and over, as I do when I like something. I usually only do this with music, not so much with movies and books.

I listened to HEY! and Gigantic for the first time, Velouria, and Purple Tape songs.


I like the other version where he's wearing his brown tee better, from London, because he does this kid thing where he is like a kid or handicapped, and does it so well, for the effect of this song and conveying an idea.

Also, I noticed the woman here, in her song Gigantic, sang it better in a London version (the drummer was better or something was picked up) more than in another performance. They must get a rush playing there or maybe it's because it was newer to sing (older performances where they still felt new).
London 1988: (actually, the other one had more of a feel to it, but the drums are better in this version. She was still emotive years later with the song, which is what I like in an artist--the ability to create an interpretation. That makes a performance art)I like her voice here. I guess they're comparable, I just liked it faster last night bc I was typing to it.

That man, the lead, is psychic. He isn't a show off about it, but finds it amusing.

and this i know, his teeth is white as snow. perfect. it's not 'are', it's 'is' bc that, in the phrase, fits lyrically to the song. just a nice nuance. and, i don't know my grammar, but does it matter? i clearly know my art.

I really like the Purple Tape song where he ends by singing "me. Me. Me. me. Me. me." at the end.

Also, I listened to Whitney Houston's I Will Always Love You before Pixies "Hey". What a juncture. I Will Always Love You to "Hey".

I used to ice skate to that Houston song.

I ice-skated to that song at the rink in Clackamas Mall and at the other main rink in Oregon. It is a great song to ice skate to. It feels good on ice because of the rush of the cool breeze against your face with her soaring you feel like your soaring to the music.

I like Pixies a LOT.

I also saw a British woman on "worst audition ever" for Simon x factor and she was charming in her own way. Rachel in the black sports bra.
Update 1/17/13.

I was told to wear a different lipstick and "adapt" to my age. I thought about doing that and then decided, nah. I go without make up with no problem, and in an outdoor jacket, like this, it's what fits, but I also like art.

Artists do not have to adapt if they don't want to. That's why some of them starve, but they are ever the true artist.

What I can say about this webcam on this particular that I was pushed to buy, and have not been successful returning yet, is that it makes me look 3x uglier and older than I am. I have ugly days, but not like I've had with this laptop. Adora at Fred Meyer wanted me to buy this one. I saw the look on her face over it. They shut down my Acer that takes great photos and was used for a UN complaint and tried to stick me with a laptop that makes me ugly as sin. Am I vain? or are THEY vain for being so petty it comes down to breaking into my house to STEAL my receipts?

I am still returning this computer and I talked to 2 different managers about it and each time I ask them to check the video surveillance for the day I bought this, they suddenly never call back.

So far, 2 of them have supposedly quit work, both of them at the same time I ask them to check video surveillance. I mean, is someone beating them up in the back room, telling them to shut up about it and make it so impossible they're fleeing the store?

What the ?

Oh, and yeah. I can't take art as a hobby but I could ditch my English major and career aspirations to be a full-time art student. It's just one thing or the other with these people.

It's not acceptable for me to have a passion for painting. It is only acceptable if I throw away my classics and ideas of being a non-profit entrepreneur or lawyer or professional. You know, go ahead and starve. Be a kid teacher, for the gov. Or, be a dental assistant, and do something so glamorous as scraping scum off of other people's teeth. Or, maybe the guy with the bent up head. Ricky. Ricky oh ricky. And then guess what. New Ricky, FBI daddy-o retired to shoot up gun shells all over the hills by my grandparents and stick a knife in Grandpa's butt. Who is waiting at the ER? Just Claudia, from the oncology department holding a syringe full of viruses.

So no. I have been pushed and tortured to not be an actual artist, diving into my art on the side, and selling some oil paintings. It's to scrap my art, scrap my voice and singing, and then get me to do some job that pays nothing.

After my son has been stolen.

Do you want some sense? Here. Don't ask me to babysit your kids after you steal mine. Don't ask me to work for you CPS, while you are holding my own son hostage. Don't ask me, U.S., to work with the FBI and your "teamsters" when you haven't corrected your wrongs and leave my entire family in the dark, tortured, and refusing to give us FOIA.

You asked me the wrong way.

You asked for a favor from ME, and to "work with us" when you held me hostage.

Work with you.



Didn't anyone ever tell you, you catch more spies with honey than vinegar. This is what I see. I see, with my artistic eye, not my minds eye, this song "Gigantic" by Pixies, to Demi Moore working out in the bootcamp movie where she trains to be a Navy Seal, but in the twist version, she tells on everyone, about U.S. torture of U.S. citizens. Another country attacks.

End of story. It's real Grimms. See, if you listen to this, and do not watch it, you can match Demi Moores voice to it. And then include her push ups. Of course, WWIII breaks out.

If you want someone to "work" for you, you don't torture them and use them as a kid, and take their own kid from them, and push them to do this and then push them to do that, and then freak out and start whining about "Why don't you work with us" to suddenly reduce your liabilities for being apprehended and discovered for crimes against humanity.

You don't ask for favors from people, your own citizens, when you're torturing them. All you'll get from that is someone who doesn't love you and works for you because they're forced to work for you, out of fear or compromise, not admiration or respect or love.

I was raising my son with the best method.

He never disobeyed me because he loved me so much. He did things for himself but also for me. I gave him freedom, he gave me obedience and trust because he knew I'd never ask anything of him that wasn't for his good.

All that this country has asked of me, is to fear them and that is not conducive to trust.

If you even look at the ideas some other countries have of raising their children, not all ideas are good and it's not for every kid and not all kids are happy. But the Asian and some of the other countries, where they are co-sleeping with their mothers, learn love and loyalty early. Some of the Mexican army people who went on to make huge sacrifices, were raised the same way, with their mothers at their sides. They are more willing to voluntarily give of themselves, for others, because of the trust and love they develop early. It's not spoiling a child. It's creating a bond.

My son was raised to have a bond.

My family deserves to have a hearing made to expose what has been done to us, and how we've been used. Only after this is done, is it possible to talk about "working with you", if ever. You can't use citizens this way and it's against the law to torture us.

How many times does this need to be said.

CPS has no authority over my son. It is an FBI matter. That is it. The FBI and The President can correct this, no other agency. It is not a "court" issue. It is not a matter of process. It is a kidnapping, and TORTURE of U.S. citizens. Sorry, but the "courts" don't handle "the Truth". You know, they don't touch the CIA and U.S. Army. In fact, I HAVE made a peititon for habeas corpus and the Magistrate assigned had a conflict of interest and knew himself what it was.

He threw it out.

Regardless, my son doesn't belong to the Avilas and he is my son. This country allowed him to be kidnapped from me and this country continues to allow torture of him and of the rest of us.

In the meantime, my Dad is told to write emails that make him sound uneducated when he's not. I hear him speak, and his grammar is not the same speaking to me as it is in the phoney email and diaries he's being forced to make.

Who would want to have him sound dumb over email except for a group that thinks another group is watching and looking in? There is some group in the U.S. that wants my Dad to look bad to another group.

I guess it's the same group that doesn't want me to take a painting class and be an English major at the same time, but would would be happy if I threw away English to take art as a trade.

So then it's a trade school. Not art for arts sake.

The group behind this thinks about every possible angle. It's like the nouveau riche scrambling for their territory. As if they read the play book real fast and decided it was coming too naturally to some, so they had to shoot them down with NASA assault.


And get your own music ideas by the way. Try "originality" but don't steal my music and songs when you're looking for a coat and hat.

Who wanted me to buy a computer that takes hideous photos? Adora. A woman. A young woman, who hates my mother. So why would Adora care?

Adora cares because she is a catty woman who is like how many other catty women who have stolen from me and poisoned me with poisoned cigarettes, some who have mafia daddies laughing out of the side window of SUVs as I'm taken on false accusations to a psych ward.

Jealous. I'm not the one who is jaded or green with envy. I think that shoe is on another foot.

I am tired of even weird men telling me what to do. Like "wear flip flops" in Wenatchee and "you're not in D.C. anymore" and even back in 1998, "wear flats, you don't need to wear high heels." Why should any man care about this? and then to the point of even trying to prevent me from wearing a skirt or having anything decent to wear. In Oregon, it's appropriate to wear outdoor kinds of clothing. But I am so tired of being forced out of painting classes even, what else do I have to paint? My face. literally. I can't use oils in my house and watercolors have no place to dry out in this small space. So the only kind of art I had was taking photos of different things and making arrangements.

It doesn't matter what I try to do, if I become good at anything, or show any talent at anything, I am then being literally assaulted by NASA?

And I'm sorry, but having music artists steal my MUSIC from me? but I'm the beggar. I have women making a living off of my original songs, who beg off of me, and steal from me, but I am not allowed to profit myself.

What about the women who used a poisoned cigarette against me? No one cared to investigate that. I find that odd, especially when it occured a couple of blocks from the FBI offices in Seattle.

I think Anne Craine/Crane is maybe connected to the Sandbergs. That is a total tangent, but I was reminded of Michelle Erickson today. Some of her buddies were friends with the man who was Francie's boyfriend. So basically, Erickson is connected to the cokehead. Michelle Erickson is. I need to post this in a different spot.

I am just now listening to "Where Is My Mind?" at 9:30 p.m. and a little earlier, and the voice in the background is the same thing I used to sing as a teen, about that time. The harmony. I used to sing that way, and I used to cry that way. It sounds like me from back then.

It's me, exactly.

I also remember, that while I had never heard of this group or heard these songs, I am positive others did and connected it to me as well. The "yeah" vocalization is something that Travis Vice said to me ALL THE TIME in the exact same way. The Vices went to the New Song Church I ended up going to, in Portland, Oregon. He started saying this to me, all the time, but he wasn't always doing that. He had 2 other brothers, Tim and Tom. Tom married Halea, Halea is whose house I rented a room from, and she is the one who knew Ragnar from Denmark. Tom never made this comment, but Travis started doing it ALL THE TIME, and mainly directed to me.

Then what's odd, is Gary Hemenway asked me to sing background vocals on his CD at White Horse and I did, and it was similiar to this because this is how I used to sing and is also very much the sound I made when I cried, when I was younger. So I sang backup on this one song and played it for Lorraine Rose and she freaked out over it.
Lorraine Rose the British woman. She just acted so weirded out by it. It was really beautiful but something got to her. Then, I had that CD in my house and someone broke into my house and stole it from me. Wait, they stole "Sacred" by Kate Miner and then they stole the CD I did, from my house or car. They stole it possibly along with Sacred.

So here is this song, and it sounds like me in the background, and the part about swimming...I think this is what I was being mocked over. By the "Americorp" woman "Jill". "Keep swimming."

Keep swimming indeed. All the way from Boston, MA. Jill, with Americorp, said this to me and I told my Dad about it. She said it with such venom and deliberate pointedness, that I thought to tell my parents because it was so intentioned. I am sure people make comments all the time, but the way she said it.

So yes, I believe a lot of people have known things about me and my family and concealed it from me. Sometimes while making fun of me or mocking my Dad, and sometimes while using us.

I think to myself, where would Travis Vice get this idea? and the only thing I can think of is his Dad is U.S. military. I mean, unless when Tom and Halea started dating, Hilary told her something that Ragnar (Danish guy) told her. Then Tom could have told Travis and he started saying this. Because it took awhile before this became his "habit". And then all of a sudden, he would say it while leaning in my face sort of, or loudly in church, the exact same way the singer does it. Usually at youth church.

Why would I be connected to Boston, MA unless it's through CIA-U.S. Army MKUltra spying on me all the time and passing info along. So then what? some people later make fun of me over this? and I had no idea. As if I had any clue at all, and I have to live with people like "Jill" mocking me to my face, and saying, "Keep Swimming." She said this to me in 2009, after I met Chris Rozollo, who was a scuba diver.

The other weird thing is I remember the actual day that a break dancer showed me on the blacktop or concrete, how he could spin on his head. That was earlier though, 4th or 5th grade. Sometime when me and Katie Fallon were friends. I wandered over and wanted to watch them and he kept showing me this. I stood on my head at my house, but didn't try break dancing. I don't know. It's a little weird, only because of the voice so much like mine, exactly. I mean, exact. It's how I sounded when I cried.

Jill with Americorp. Like SHE has a bright future.

I know Lorraine heard my background singing and her oldest daughter did. I remember she was sort of cold and dismissive about it, Lorraine, saying it was a lot of technology helping my voice to sound good--something like that, about the reverb on it. It had sort of hurt my feelings because she said that, and then she also seemed to want to minimize anything I did. I didn't "own" my house, I "rented", when really, I owned my own house. I don't know. It wasn't that big of a deal with Lorraine at all. I just know later someone stole it and stole Kate Miner's "Sacred" from me, and then I had all these odd comments from people at church. I think the Vice Dad was U.S. Army. I am pretty sure he was/is Army. None of his sons were military though, at that time, not to my knowledge.

The band singer who wrote this one was in Boston when it was written. I thought they were all London people but he was in Boston for that. So then I later meet Mark, of course, U.S. Army, from Boston.

Like no one knows who I am or anything about my family.

Where is my mind. Um. It was more like, "Who broke into my house, and where is my Miner?"

I was listening to the song "Hey" and I am seriously beginning to believe my Mom and Dad and their twins have literally been chained. I know the song is about figurative speech and poetry, but there is too much evidence to think it's NOT possible anymore.

In the movie by Steven Speilberg, about the precogs, the 3 people who see the future and predict crimes, they are chained in the water. "Where is my mind? way the water..."

Yeah. I have wondered, when I realized my parents are twins--I have wondered where the other set goes and what happens to them. I am beginning to believe they are forced to go to a secret prison of some kind and I don't even know how long it's been going on. Maybe it hasn't been all the time, but I am positive horrible things have been done to them secretly. The first time that I heard the song "Hey" and connected the actual real possibility that my parents are forcibly chained and restrained, was just a few days ago.

Also, they are definitely twins. My Dad with the rough and calloused feet, the next day the other one is taking off his socks and it's the smooth feet Bob with no callouses or redness or hard soles or anything.

I think my parents are seriously wanting someone to check the MKUltra files and help them now. It was months ago, but that one night, my MOm and Dad both left the house, and I saw both of them get in the car, and heard them talking on the way out, and then I was at the window, and at one point, I looked over and it was an arm reaching up to the light. It was by my Dad's sofa chair, there is a tall standing lamp, and someone was crouched down there so I couldn't see who it was, but I just saw this arm go up, and toward the light and then that was it. I was too afraid to go over and see who it was. I didn't have a bad feeling about it, but I knew someone was inside of their house. I thought it was a twin at first.

Most of the things done to my parents, I never even see.

Then I don't know what it is with O'Reilly but not today but the day before, I think, Carolla was on saying if you want off the boat Captain, I'll buy you the first drink. He said the Navy has a saying. It's not to buy a drink, it is to drown. The drink is the water. That is what he was refering to. So at some point today O'Reilly made some comment about glad to see you're on the boat again. Something like that. ?

What is seriously going on. I mean, my family deserves to have someone investigate and get the FOIA from the FBI on my parents and brother to confirm "destruction of records" around the same MKUltra Senate Hearings in 1977.

As for Jill, the most I gathered was that I believe she is possibly friends with Amy Goodman, a woman in Seattle, WA. Jill interned for Americorp at the YWCA in Wenatchee, WA. So, through her federal job, it was lots of love from Jill.

You know, it's federal. People using and abusing their positions in the government, to harm my family and then mock us over it. Half of the time I have no idea what they're even talking about. It is like they have been imagining they are punishing me over something I know about. Or, they are just hoping it gets back to my parents, whom they know it will hurt most.

Jill the Pill.

"Keep swimming". I mean, out of nowhere. I was nice to her and everything. Never rude, never had a reason to dislike her, and she was so sarcastic and mean. It was said after my son was poisoned with hair bleach or perm solution too. I had just seen my son at a CPS visit and he showed up that way and the next thing I knew, Jill with Americorp was making this horrible comment to me. I was standing outside, at a yardsale thing. I wasn't doing anything anywhere near water. I later saw there was some card, blue and black and white, in her van, with someone's name on it that was Jewish and with a connection to carpentry or construction or something.

The other possibly related woman is the one who broke my hand at the federal facility in Knoxville, TN. I believe that officer, who freaked out when I asked her to count my money, is connected to Jill from Seattle, WA. I am positive. I saw a recent "FedEx" commercial of a woman (wife) pulling a jacket down off from her husband, where she accuses him of "stealing office supplies from our daughter" and says "I BUY office supplies from FedEx".

Well, believe me. The crimes against MY family, are federal.

So when I see mockery even from ads on t.v. by FedEx, I am not surprised. You know, they even made the guy look like he didn't know what he was doing, or was losing his mind too, didn't they? Very effective mockery.

I sort of like the "one-upmanship" attempt but it fails at "torture of human beings". These people are the ones who are gloried and who everyone waves their "hail hitler" flag to, who get bombed and half of them die by another country's hands and the rest go to jail for committing crimes against their own citizens. Then, we build the museum to commemorate the victims and the woman with the high hand, suddenly looks more like the ignorant foolish monster.

Check on Jill and the woman cop from Knoxville. It is a match. ID=ID. I don't mean they are the same person, I mean they are 100% connected to eachother and there is a thread to follow. Just a hunch, and that's all I ever have, since I am not psychic.

I get hunches and I'm "intuitive".

No comments: