Saturday, May 21, 2011

Destroying My Livelihood & Rights

I have always been good with children, without exception.

And this was my livlihood and my occupation: working with children, for almost 2 decades.

I was about to open my own daycare for a few children, and my enemies blocked me from doing this by making false allegations.

I then had my own son taken at the same time, when my entire life, this is the work I've done.

I have never, in my life, had a psychological evaluation that has designated me as having any specific mental illness.

Despite the lack of formal diagnosis, I have been broadly defamed.

I had 1 "psych eval" that lasted 1 1/2 hours and was tainted. Even then, the psychologist came to NO conclusions and did not make a diagnosis. That was the CPS, WA state-paid psychologist who received a huge amount of material by WA state that was defamatory, which they gave her after she saw me and felt nothing was wrong with me.

Not only that, every single objective test I've ever taken, my entire life, has been clean and clear of any mental illness indicators. That includes Weschel or whatever, MMPI, MMPI-II and parenting evaluations.

The only "claims" of mental illness have come from enemies.


The claim originated from Mt. Angel Abbey & Archdiocese insurance companies, law firms, and those who tried to cover up for criminal or civil violations. When I made a complaint of misconduct about FBI employees, which the FBI could have been liable for, in a court of law, and required to compensate me for damages, the FBI persons involved who were in with the church and other corrupt individuals, smeared me and defamed me. They smeared me to cover for the FBI employees and as a favor to the lawyers and insurance companies. And the head directors for both the Oregon and Washington branches of FBI that I had to deal with, were Catholic.

My best friends from jr. high still know me and do not believe I am mentally ill, and my family, while under pressure to deny my claims of torture and my son's torture, still will not and have not ever said they believe I am mentally ill or that I need medication.

I then was sent to a psych ward, in Tennessee, with the encouragement of none other than the FBI. It was FBI personnel and Brad Uhl with the DEA, who has connections to Chris Rozollo from Florida. Through DEA and other law enforcement work. The people motivated to defame me again, from FBI offices, were working through both D.C. channels and some of their own corrupt channels.

In this time of "evaluation" (so-called), they did not evaluate me at all.

I did not have a diagnosis upon being sent there. It was not, what they said, is that it was not a "hospitalization" because to do this, a Judge had to consent to it. There was no Judge consenting to this and I was not formally hospitalized. However, during the week which they claimed they were "evaluating" me, they did NO evaluation.

Based on FBI and other group's defamation--HEARSAY, ALONE, they injected me with the same medications that are used on perceived "dissidents".

I showed up at the emergency room for a blood sample to be drawn because of abnormal internal bleeding. This is something that I had done in Seattle and it proved there were abnormalities. However, this time they deliberately refused to do a blood draw, and had me detained. They then refused me my right to contact an attorney or to have a phonebook to look one up, and when I told the woman in charge that I had not even been evaluated at the ER for a psychical exam, AT ALL, when I showed up for an injured knee and internal bleeding, she looked at her reports and saw it was true. So then she left the room and came back a half hour later and claimed the doctor had written a report that he examined my knee.

No blood draw was done even though I asked for this repeatedly, and was reporting internal bleeding.

I had not thought that I mentioned having gone to the FBI and their recommendation that I go to Vanderbilt ER, however, I may have brought it up. They deliberately defamed me, on HEARSAY alone.

This is DEFAMATION in the worst degree.

Because of defamation, which has no basis in fact or sound theory, and with ZERO supporting evidence of a psychological exam or diagnosis (even though I've had psych exams), this has been used to create and cause damages to me, with willful and knowing intent to harm.

When I was driven from Vanderbilt to the other psych ward, there was a white man there who was former military and he disliked me. He was responsible for convincing the Eastern Indian doctor to inject me with medications I did not need, after he was the one telling me he was going to have to hold me down on a mattress on the floor. He mocked me and harassed me and I kept documentation about him. He was former U.S. military and he referenced comments made by Chris Rozollo.

With ZERO "evaluation", they injected me with harmful medications. They then forced me to take oral medications and lied in their records about how much they gave me, because I kept a written record of exactly what I was forced to take, what I was told it was, the color and shape and any marks on the pills, and I did not miss describing exactly what I was given.

They kept me at the psych ward for a WEEK, and the entire time, not once did I sit down and talk to anyone, a psychologist, about anything. I ate the food I was given so they didn't have an excuse to say I was suicidal and depriving myself of food, and I kept to myself. I made small talk with others there, played some board games, walked and did yoga, and read my Bible. I made small talk and played board games only to demonstrate I was not a recluse and nothing in my conversation was important, at all. It was small talk.

In the meantime, they were not "evaluating" me for mental illness. They were evaluating how much I knew, and they had other military and psychic workers in there, attempting to use me for their own research. They had a couple of people literally in that psych ward, to have proximity to me, for trying out their psychic skills and nothing more. They were not mentally ill at all. One man was Asian and he was not there because he was mentally ill. In the "groups" we had to go to, they were playing jeopardy games with political questions, like that someone would ask of a President, in a presidential debate.

At the very end, after they forced me to take an overdose of pills and lied in their records about how much they forced me to take, I couldn't speak and my tongue was contorted from the effects. Only then, was I sent to talk to a psychologist. I couldn't even talk. He asked a few questions and said, "You're paranoid-schitzophrenic" and I said, "How did you come up with that?" They decided I was "paranoid-schitzophrenic" before they ever "evaluated" me, because that's what they injected me with medications for, supposedly. I have NO diagnosis.

I only have SMUT that's been written about me in FBI and state workers files, by people who were covering up for their own friends and insurance companies.

The entire time I was there, I never had "odd" behavior. I also never said anything out of the ordinary. They didn't use the time for "evaluating" me at all, because they decided they "knew" on the first day, in the first hour, when there was ZERO supporting diagnosis or professional analysis.

All they had, was lies, and political smut.

I was watched, and "observed" while under the effects of an overdose that could have killed me because it was contraindicated for anyone with susceptibility to seizures or epilepsy. Then I was shown material that "...the FBI gave us this...and said _____".

It was all about what the FBI said and wanted.

One doctor said, "Give her the antidote" and they gave me stronger medications to counter the effects. From that point on, I refused to take medications and they did not force me to take medications, for the last 2 days. If there was something in my food, I don't know. They had each tray given to you as your name was called out.

I went before a Judge and the Judge found no cause to have me formally admitted to be hospitalized. I was not psychotic, nor was I ever psychotic. I was also not mentally ill.

I have been a political pawn, and that is it.

The Judge signed papers ordering me to be released and with no legal cause for hospitalization.

I filed for my passport the next week. Using all of my benefit money from Washington state to do it. Someone in the U.S. didn't "like" the idea of my moving on, and quickly offered me a job at a place where I was again used for research and tortured and experimented with. I kept my mouth shut because I needed what little money I got, even though it was hardly anything.

When I worked at the restaurant, 9 times out of 10, if there was a crying kid or baby, they quit crying when I approached or said something to them.

Everything about me has been picked apart and used as some kind of science project--even my ability to calm and quiet a crying child.

My ability doesn't come from some other "psychic's power" or from some gimmick I use. It comes from having an authentic gift with children and you can't lie to animals and kids, because they pick up on it. They know you're a good person or not. I'm not saying all kids and animals like me, because of course most are loyal to parents and not strangers. But, my average with kids, at Logan's, was not an exception for me.

This is how it has been with my MY ENTIRE life. Which is why I read the books I read, and cared about kids and was working with children my entire life, to be the best mother I could be. Children sense good energy with me, because it is there for them.

I didn't approach every crying child because usually I let the parents handle it. But if they still cried, I would approach. We're not just talking about kids that someone could train to quit crying, but babies.

One time, I prayed that children would see an angel of God behind me or something of God that adults couldn't see. I prayed this once, when I went to work. And it was the strangest thing because this one boy, who had black parents and I still remember where they were sitting, he was acting like he was ecstatic, and giggling and clapping his hands, every time I passed and then if I left he got fussy. His own parents stared at him in shock. I thought, "I think that child maybe really saw an angel."

Probably 9 times out of 10, I was able to help them quit crying, not be as sad, or think about something else. This is how it has been my whole life. Which is what made me a good nanny and an even better mother.

Today, I heard a couple of kids crying in the daycare at the Y. I walked in to say hello as I've done a few times in the past. One Asian boy was being held and had a bottle of milk, maybe 1 year old or so, and he was still crying. She put him down and he turned to me and I picked him up. When I did, he quit crying. Then she took him and he started to cry again. So I picked him up again and he quit crying. He made a few peeps, but I bounced him the way I used to bounce my son and he quit. They like the movement because it's like the feeling of moving up and down in the womb, which they still remember. Then, I said, "bop, bop, a bop" and made some musical bop noise when I bounced and said to him, "You are holding onto your cup really well, because it's not falling!" and he got a little smirk at the corner of his mouth. What did he do next? a few minutes later he was holding onto his sippy cup with just his teeth and not his hands. And I commented on this and said, "You are a smart boy, aren't you?"

Kids are smart. Babies are smart.

What I do, is I give them respect.

Then the Eastern Indian woman started to walk by with this dark look on her face which she tried to change when I looked at her. She came in and then left, I guess to tattle and have someone tell me not to be there. So the manager came in.

There was another little girl there who had been crying too, and I tried to help and she also quit crying.

The manager came in and I was told I was not allowed to be in the room with the kids.

Why? because I have been grossly defamed.

The woman said, "I guess I'll take him back but I think he'll start crying again." and I said, "No, he won't cry." and even though he did cry before, I knew he wouldn't this time.

I handed him to her and he didn't cry at all. Just as I knew.

He was not going to cry, and I said it out loud before I handed him to her. How did I know?

Because I am an intuitive mother and I know what I know.

The CPS and state workers I had to deal with should not be working with children at all. These are the people that should be dealing cards in Las Vegas. How they ever got their jobs to begin with, is sheer desperation for any kind of work, and maybe something that they thought their husbands or boyfriends might think was a nice thing to do.

They're like the candy-stripers of The Child Development and Care" community.

And THOSE women hate me for more than one reason.

They're husbands and boyfriends lusted after me, maybe. They didn't like the fact that I challenged their shoddy work. They didn't like the fact that I was unwilling to cover up for their husbands, brothers, fathers, and boyfriends who were criminals, and they were jealous of my every ability, including my intelligence and ability and knowledge of children.

I made them look bad.

All that these people have "had" on me, is hearsay and lies.

There has not been ONE professional psychological evalution and when I asked my own lawyer, Justin Titus, several times to ask for a private psychological evaluation for my defense, he refused.

He was bribed.

Because of people like this, as an innocent person, I have been robbed of my credibility, my child, and my professional career and livlihood, which was, up to that point, working with children.

When people dare say, "It's all about you" now, I would counter with, "Yeah. Because you fucking took the kids away from me."

God damn those in the FBI who have any part, at all, in smearing me. And God damn (curse) those who are state workers and are corrupt and lied to cover for themselves, others, and allowed for the torture of me and my child.

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