Tuesday, September 6, 2011

Kevin Bolls Sermon and Impression

I got this sermon yesterday, and listened to it yesterday. It was pretty good, by a Kevin Bolls.

It talked about Psalm 51 and the passage of Isaiah, how Sarah and Abraham refused to believe God was going to give them a child of their own the natural way...

So they hired a woman to do it for them.

The sermon was about waiting on God and how sometimes people get impatient and try to do things their own way and it backfires.

That was another point to the sermon, about how witchcraft and voodoo can backfire.

But, about Sarah and Abraham, they waited 10 years, and didn't have a kid so they figured they would take matters into their own hands. Sarah said, "Hey, here is my friend or handmaid, she can have our baby for us." So they got their baby, but because they did things their way instead of waiting for a different promise that had been given to them, they got Ishmael, and this caused divisiveness for generations. It was about how you should not doubt in the dark, what God shows you in the light.

(Which is weird because yesterday I was going to write a post called "How to make Sun Tea When It's Cloudy).

And it talked about how sometimes you don't make lemonaide with the lemons, and shouldn't, because the lemons are rotten. Sometimes, you just have to throw the lemon OUT.

The CD had one sermon and then an extra part to it and I think that was for the baptisms because there was a baptism for Mary yesterday (for some reason, bloody Mary came to mind but I also thought about this other woman named Maria and it was a good section, not bad. I was thinking about a child baptism being for a bloody mary, for some reason).

The entire time I listened to it I sensed pretty good energy. Then it talked about, after the couple that couldn't wait, about other stories and he included this part about voodoo and witchcraft, how it shouldn't be done, because if you don't do just one very small thing right, in the whole laying out of the curse or spell or whatever, it backfires. And it can backfire big.

He talked about how some will say, "If you just do it like THIS, or we need to do such and such like THIS __________ and then you trust and rely on some voodoo to work things out for you, it will backfire."

So anyway, then this man said he lost all these things and didn't know why God was closing the door. I thought, "This part is definitely not for me. I think this is a sermon for someone else for sure."

Because for me, with my son at least, it's not about waiting. It has to be about action. And there is no "closed door".

The song they sang was "I will never be the same again" and then after this there were 2 baptisms, one for a Maria and one for a Dwayne.

I remembered this kid's name that I was writing about the other day, it was Isaiah.

And I think Dwayne or something similiar was the name of one of the FBI guys that came out to visit me but I would have to check.

I listened to the sermon yesterday but I really felt it was for someone else. It was a good sermon, but there is no closed door for what God's will is, to me, although, yeah, I would say I've closed the door on certain things myself.

Like dating. I'm not interested. Or compromise over my son. I'm not interested.

I like who I am and I'm not interested in being tortured either or lying to say I was nuts and not really being tortured by people who are criminals and support criminal families.
When I got the impression about Michelle Obama the other day, it was instant. I got a lot of things but again, maybe they're not all accurate. But it was immediate.

Earlier in the day or the day before, when I had written about asking God to see something and seeing a man with clenched teeth at about 8:40 a.m., it was about William or Harry. I don't know which one I got, because I just decided to pray and test it and see if I would be shown anything, out of curiosity. Who knows. Maybe I got Charles. But what I asked, was, "show me what William is doing right now at this moment" and I got a lot of things and it felt like it was all fuzzy and just imagination. Like, seeing rope, seeing eating, seeing buttons...not all things were possible or done at one and it wasn't feeling true. So I waited and waited and then said only if God wanted to show me and then I said, "Or about anyone in the world or something important, if it will help me get my son Oliver back." So I waited and said, "And William, well either one then...whatever you want." So I just wanted to see something that was right in the moment, to either test if God shows me things or WANTS to show me things, or to see if there was something else important that would lead to helping my son or convincing someone that God wanted them to help me get my son back.

And all of a sudden, I got something. It was very fast and came right up and because it wasn't my imagination and I couldn't fully understand what it was, I knew that was it--what God was showing me for that moment. And it was a man with his teeth clenched and in some kind of pressure thing or something that shakes. I thought that it was like something where you feel it lifting up suddenly. It wasn't like driving fast on a bike and clenching teeth, it was something else, which is why I thought maybe flight similator. Maybe it was torture. I have no idea. But I didn't know if it matched either W or H or if it was of someone else. The face was right up close. I saw it inches away from my own face. And it was about 8:40 a.m. my time. I'm checking my clock now to see if it's right and matches up to the time on other things. So far, I checked a phone and it might be about 20 minutes off. Let me see... I checked. It seems to be right to the computer clocks but those can be off so I'll check in the other house to be sure. I think my clock is a couple of minutes fast.

Not yesterday but the day before, I saw what looked like Kate Middleton, screaming. But maybe it wasn't her. Just all of a sudden, screaming and upset and pacing. I thought it was her specifically. And then a few days ago, I saw a very young blond woman crying and throw herself prostrate on the floor to pray to God and she was wearing pants or jeans and just threw herself down to cry out to God. I don't know who she was, but it was dramatic.

For some reason, I see a lot of blondes. I don't know why. Only a few brunettes, and tons of blondes feature into my impressions and images. All with different features, but lots of them. I've seen so many different kinds of blondes and I don't even know who they are but I can usually tell, "this one is not that other one"

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